Explore your sign’s 2024 horoscope predictions to learn what is in store for you this year in love, career, and more. Check out the love compatibility of each sign to learn more about zodiac pairings and all things compatibility.
July is a month of connection, hope, planning, and rejuvenation. The energy begins to settle more this month after a somewhat dramatic June. This is when new relationship developments will be taking place, and when the power of love, understanding, and connectivity prevails. We enter July in Cancer Season, and when the Sun is in Cancer emotions are high, but so is the love. There is more nurturing and caring energy flowing through the world this month and you will feel it strongly as you move through it.
The month begins with Neptune going retrograde in Pisces from July 2 until December 7. Neptune retrograde makes things a little foggy for now, and inner clarity may feel more challenging to grab ahold of. Overall, Neptune moving into retrograde motion tells us our dreams have the power to become a reality, but make sure you balance your realistic goals with the hope you have for it all. Mercury moves into Leo on the same day, and Mercury in this fire sign brings the heat into communication matters. Mercury in Leo wants to perform. Conversations are more drastic and intense for the time being, and this transit will allow you to feel more confident in what you have to say while giving space for others to do so as well.
The Month Ahead: Your July 2024 Horoscopes
On July 5, the New Moon of the month occurs. This New Moon will be in Cancer, joining the Sun. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for your emotional world and to not only visualize what you want in your life right now but to take the time to truly feel into it. Take a relaxing bath, go to the beach, light a candle of intention, and do what feels soothing and nurturing to your life during this time.
On July 11, Venus moves into Leo, and Venus in Leo is a proud lover. Venus, the planet of love, being in this bold fire sign brings passion to romantic and relationship matters. Don’t be afraid to put yourself first right now and to go after the love you want, while knowing you deserve the best for yourself. This is a time of recognizing your desires in love.
Mars leaves Taurus and enters Gemini on July 20, and this is bringing a little chaos to the emotional waters of Cancer Season. Mars in Gemini is proactive but can also be reactive, and we are being asked to think things through before acting on them. The day after, there is a Full Moon in Capricorn, and this is the Strawberry Moon of the year. This Full Moon is all about letting go of self-sabotage and recognizing the growth, skills, and achievements you have created in your life thus far.
This Full Moon is about checking in, doing the work, and letting go of old belief systems that don’t serve you. Don’t underestimate yourself right now.
Leo Season officially begins on July 22 this year, and this Leo Season will be interesting as Mercury will be going retrograde later in August. On July 25, Mercury moves out of Leo and enters Virgo, and Mercury feels more powerful here. Mercury will be in Virgo until August 14, and communication is more clear, direct, and thoughtful. Mercury in Virgo asks all the right questions, and your power is in the details right now.
Before July comes to an end, Chiron goes retrograde in Aries from July 26 until December 29, and healing takes priority right now. While Chiron is retrograde, this is a good time to be proactive with your healing and the things that matter to you and to focus on renewing your inner power and living a confident life. Overall, July is about doing what is best for you, your heart, and your peace of mind.
What July 2024 Has In Store For Your Zodiac Sign
Read for your sun sign and rising sign below to see what the month has in store for you.
ARIES
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleYour guidance for the month is to take your time with what you are developing and to consider all options, Aries. The Sun is in your 4th house of home and family for most of the month, and you need more time to decompress right now. You are moving through July with a sense of purpose but also with more of a need to emotionally regulate and understand your inner world better. Venus will be entering a more romantic area of your birth chart on July 11, and this is going to be spicing things up for you in life and love.
On July 21, there is a Full Moon occurring in your 10th house of career, reputation, and achievement, and this is a good time to take a look at how far you have come. Work matters are culminating and some important projects are seeing completion now. Before the month ends, Chiron goes retrograde in your sign until the end of the year, and you are going to be learning more about what it means to love yourself, heal, and ask the tough questions.
TAURUS
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about getting the right head space and heart space, Taurus. A lot is developing for you right now, but it may be hard to notice your progress because things are moving as quickly as you have hoped. With a New Moon happening on July 5, in the area of the birth chart having to do with communication, you are receiving some important divine guidance as the month begins.
Set your intentions for mental clarity and allow yourself to be heard right now as you never know what may spark the right conversations that need to be had.
Venus, your ruling planet, enters Leo and moves into your 4th house on July 11. This transit for you will be all about bringing love and compassion into the home and feeling a stronger support system in your life. Find your people and connect more with the people you resonate with and feel safe with. Before the month ends there is a Full Moon happening in an adventurous area of your birth chart, and the things you took a leap of faith on over the past month, are coming full circle for you now.
GEMINI
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is about creating boundaries and putting your well-being first, Gemini. Gemini Season is over, but there is still a lot on your plate as your responsibilities accumulate. With the Sun in your 2nd house of income for most of the month, you are focused on your financial world right now and are creating new plans for your growth here. The New Moon on July 5, will be helping you set the right intentions for your abundance and will be showing you what has been blocking your flow here.
Venus enters your 3rd house of communication on July 11, and this is bringing in more connection and understanding in your life. Mid-July you are feeling more of the coming together with others that you have been looking for this month. On July 20, Mars enters your sign where it will be until September 4, and you have more energy, charisma, and direction with you now. This summer is going to be very active for you, and you are going to be having a lot of fun.
CANCER
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is all about opportunity, Cancer. It’s officially Cancer Season, and it’s your time to be bold, be confident, and go after your heart’s desires. The month begins with a New Moon in your sign on July 5, and this is a good time to set intentions for your personal goals, self-love, and self-care. This New Moon is all about getting back to you and giving yourself the love and nurturing you so often give to others.
On July 21, there is a Full Moon in your opposite sign, Capricorn, and this Full Moon is bringing things full circle when it comes to love and finances.
You have been working on your personal development this month and have been putting yourself first more, and towards the end of July, you are seeing the benefits this has brought to your close relationships and your financial reality. Cancer Season ends on July 22, the Sun moves into your house of income, and you are putting your financial goals more to the forefront. While the Sun is in Leo, your abundance increases and you are going to be seeing growth here over the next month.
LEO
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is a healing month for you, Leo. You are learning more about your heart this month, and are healing through understanding and acknowledging your past. The month begins with Mercury moving into your sign on July 2, and more clarity and understanding are coming in for you now. Mercury in Leo makes matters of the mind more prominent for you, and you are coming up with some good ideas and perspectives right now that are helping you through what is thrown your way this month.
On July 11, Venus enters Leo and love takes a turn for the better. There may have been some challenges of feeling the love in support in your life recently, and you are moving away from this energy now as you recognize the need to give yourself the love you have been seeking. Leo Season officially begins on July 22, and it’s time to shine in your truth. This Leo Season will have some ups and downs as Mercury will be going retrograde in your sign for two weeks so overall, this is your month to renew, and gain clarity.
VIRGO
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is all about having fun, Virgo. You are in high spirits this month, and there is a lot to celebrate in your life. You are feeling more friendship, connection, and overall joy this month, and this energy is more prevalent for you with the Sun in your 11th house of hopes, dreams, and manifestations for most of July. Mercury will be in your house of closure and endings as we enter the month, however, and you are experiencing a big letting go in your life as well.
The Full Moon of July is happening in a fellow earth sign, Capricorn, and romance is high for you during this time.
This Full Moon is giving you clarity on matters of the heart, and love feels more stable and secure right now. On July 25, Mercury enters your sign where it will be until August 14, and Mercury is your ruling planet and loves being in your sign. You are going to be learning a lot through communication matters over the next few weeks and will be taking more time to consider how you want to communicate and come across.
LIBRA
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is about creating abundance in your life, Libra. This is an active month for you as you take on new opportunities and thrive in what you are working towards. With the Sun in your 10th house of career for most of July, you are focused on making your goals a reality and taking on more responsibilities here. Venus moves into your 11th house of hopes, dreams, and friendship on July 11th, and this is going to help you navigate the new direction this part of your life is headed in this month.
The Full Moon of the month is a fortunate time for you and will be occurring on July 21st. This Full Moon is bringing things full circle for you in the home, and creating an emotional clarity that makes you feel safer with where you are in life and who is by your side. Before July ends, Chiron goes Retrograde in your sister sign Aries, and your love life is going to be moving through a transformation for the rest of the year. Chiron Retrograde is going to be helping you overcome any issues with codependency.
SCORPIO
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about patience and communicating effectively Scorpio. The Sun is in an adventurous and transformative area of your birth chart for most of the month, and this is a good time to travel or to think about the things you want to do in life. There is a New Moon in this same area of your chart on July 5, and it’s all about setting your intentions for adventure, inspiration, and spirituality as you start the month.
On July 11, Venus enters your 10th house of career, and you are going to be receiving more recognition, love, and support on the job.
How you are coming across to others is being received more favorably during this time, and it’s your time to show up and show out. There is a Full Moon occurring at the end of the month on July 21, and this Full Moon will be giving you some significant divine guidance. Important messages are coming in as you end the month, and you are making your voice heard.
SAGITTARIUS
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleYou are moving through a personal awakening this month, Sagittarius. The month begins with a New Moon in your 8th house of transformation on July 5, and this New Moon is all about setting intentions for your path in life and your important commitments. Look at where you are and where you want to be, and if you are receiving the same type of energy you want to be given. You are finding your balance as you enter the month overall, and you are going to be moving through a lot of changes this month as you find your way and gain some clarity.
Venus moves into a fellow Fire Sign, Leo from July 11 until August 4, and love is a source of happiness and adventure for you during this time. You are going to be feeling the love when you step out of your comfort zone more, approach things with confidence, and keep an open mind. On July 26, Chiron goes Retrograde in Aries, and this is going to change the pace for you romantically. While Chiron is retrograde in your 5th house, you are going to be defining and redefining your happiness in life.
CAPRICORN
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about moving on and moving forward Capricorn. You are moving through a time of clarity, love, and also personal healing, as you recognize what is no longer serving you or your heart anymore. The New Moon happening on July 5, will be a good time for you to set your intentions for the heart, and for the relationships that feel right for you and that you want to continue to develop over the next month.
The Full Moon of the month will be happening in your sign on July 21, and all eyes are on you right now. This Full Moon is bringing all things to do with your personal goals, health, and self-image, to the forefront. Let go of perceiving yourself with anything less than love, confidence, and support during this time. Before the month ends, Chiron goes retrograde in your 4th house of home, foundations, and inner world, and you are going to be moving through a time of deep healing and emotional renewal for the rest of the year.
AQUARIUS
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is a big month of growth for you, Aquarius. You are feeling courageous and energized when it comes to your goals, daily life, and the progress you are making right now. The Sun is in your 6th house of work and health for most of the month, and you are really working hard in July and taking care of some important responsibilities and duties. Venus moves into your opposite sign on July 11th, and you are receiving more support mid-month, and are feeling the love in your life.
There is a Full Moon happening on July 21, and this Full Moon is a time of closure and endings for you. You are letting go of what once was, and creating space for the new to enter your life. You have been through a journey of self-growth this month and you are bringing this energy into your inner world and inner harmony as well. On July 22, the Sun moves into Leo and enters a romantic and loving area of your birth chart. You are ending the month in high spirits and with love on your side.
PISCES
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleJuly is an eye-opening month for you, Pisces. You are moving through a lot of transformations this month and are focused on creating more clarity in your life. Neptune goes retrograde in your sign from July 2 until the end of the year, and you are entering a time of taking the rose-colored glasses off and seeing the truth of what’s been hidden. On July 5, there is a New Moon in your 5th house of romance, and it’s time to set your intentions for love, but also for what will make you personally happy in life and make you feel like you are living in your authentic truth.
On July 21, the Full Moon in Capricorn brings clarity regarding your hopes and dreams in life and your community. You are recognizing more of a need to be around like-minded souls and people who have similar goals as you, and you are going to be seeing new ways how to get there. Overall, there are a lot of growth moments happening for you in July, and you are learning through the inner awakening that is taking place for you now.
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At the beginning of the year, we are being shown how significant 2025 will be for love. From March 1, 2025, until April 12, 2025, Venus, the planet of love and relationships, will be retrograde. Venus goes retrograde approximately every 18 months and hasn’t been retrograde since the Summer of 2023. With love taking a step back at the beginning of the year, we move through a time of understanding the emotional world better and letting go of trying to control outcomes here.
What Does 2025 Have in Store for Love?
It’s time to refocus your relationship priorities overall, and with this retrograde happening in both Aries and Pisces, Aries being the first sign of the zodiac and Pisces being the last; there is a chapter we are closing and a new one we are walking into.
Another significant factor that is influencing relationships this year, is Jupiter’s entry into Cancer. Jupiter brings blessings, abundance, luck, and expansion, and in water sign Cancer, brings these gifts to your emotions. Cancer rules emotional safety, foundations, close loved ones, family, support, and emotional well-being, and with Jupiter in this sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, we experience blessings in stability within love. This is a good year for building stronger foundations in love, aligning with those who are loyal and supportive, knowing what you need emotionally, and being a lot clearer on it.
Letting Go of the Past: The Astrological Theme of 2025
Overall, the guideline for the year when it comes to love is to focus on the bigger picture and let things work themselves out without forcing them to. Magic will come in for you this year when you can assess your needs and wants, let go of illusions or smoke and mirrors, and focus on the things you want for yourself rather than what you don’t. Your focus and beliefs on love are the priority right now, and things will be coming full circle for the better.
Read below to see your personal 2025 love forecast. Read for your sun, moon, and rising signs.
ARIES
2025 is one of the more significant years for you, Aries. A lot of the major transits are happening in your sign, which includes Venus retrograde in Aries at the beginning of the year, Neptune in Aries from March 2025 until 2039, and Saturn in Aries from May 2025 until 2028. Not to mention, Chiron, the wounded healer is currently in your sign until 2027.
What this means for you when it comes to love, is that you have learned a lot about where you want to be here, and it’s the year to implement more of these tools and knowledge of the heart.
This year for love is about honoring your integrity and what you need personally to thrive in life and creating that space to let it in. You need someone who will be there for you through whatever you are experiencing in life and not someone who adds to these challenges. This year is a time of rising above, and choosing better for yourself.
TAURUS
2025 for you when it comes to love, is all about perspective and taking better care of your heart, Taurus. Uranus, the planet of change, rebellion, progress, and upheaval, has been in your sign since 2019, and this year you get a break from all of the surprises. From Jul. 7, 2025, until Nov. 7, 2025, Uranus leaves your sign and enters Gemini, giving your mind and your heart some time to breathe.
This year you are being given the opportunity to see things for what they are, rather than what you fear them to be. You are able to see your relationship dynamics clearer, allowing you to feel more confident in what you are building and creating for yourself in this area of your life. What you are working on this year is letting go of overthinking, and allowing things to play out the way they are meant to in love.
GEMINI
This year you are feeling in balance when it comes to love, Gemini. Relationships are important to you in life overall, as you are a relationship-oriented sign, but it can be difficult at times to keep the balance and perspective here. This year, with lucky Jupiter in your sign until June, you have the opportunity to be blessed with some fortunate circumstances personally and within romance.
You are feeling yourself this year, and this is attracting you success and new opportunities within love.
Uranus will also be in your sign this year from Jul. 7 until Nov. 7, and some surprises are in store for you. Pay attention to what happens in your love life during this period, as similar themes will be coming back around for you when Uranus officially enters its Gemini transit from 2026 - 2032. Overall, this year is about balancing what’s coming and going in love, and finding your peace within your inner confidence for it all.
CANCER
2025 for you, Cancer, is about stability in love. You are growing emotionally from the ground up, and are feeling a sense of support, confidence, romance, and receptivity in your love life this year. You are one of the lucky signs of 2025, and this is due to Jupiter, the planet of blessings, entering your sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026. While Jupiter is in your sign, your life expands and you are able to see the gifts of your world that may have been harder to come by previously.
This is a year of spending more time with your loved ones and feeling more heard and supported emotionally. Safety and security are especially important to you this year, and you are only entertaining the people who feel that way about you and provide that. Many Cancers will be expanding their families this year or developing a long-term relationship, and overall this is a year of feeling stronger when it comes to love.
LEO
When it comes to love this year for you, Leo, it’s about trusting your intuition and listening more to what your heart is telling you. There are not many major transits happening in Leo in 2025, which means there is a lot of room to grow, but you may be feeling a lack of support or encouragement to do so. A lot of Leos are taking a step back to look at where they are currently in love, and yearning for some change and a new direction here.
Neptune will be in your 9th house of adventure for most of this year, and you are being asked to get inspired and do things differently, but don’t take unnecessary risks in love that may not serve you in the long run.
It can be easy to get lost in the fantasy of love rather than the actual reality you’ll live in here, and taking more time to understand yourself, your relationships, and the dynamics in your love life will be necessary. Overall, your heart is healing this year and you are moving away from the past and creating your new future.
VIRGO
This year when it comes to love, you are going through changes that are aligning you closer to your goals and dreams here, Virgo. You are focused on making things work that you want to see bloom, and also letting go of putting effort into people that aren’t reciprocating the same energy. With the North Node entering your sister sign Pisces and the South Node moving into your sign from Jan. 11, 2025, until Jul. 26, 2026, you are doing a lot of letting go over the next year.
However, with the North Node being in your 7th house of love, new doors and gifts are also opening up for you and your partnerships. The more you can let go of perfection and overworking your mind and your heart, the more blessings you will experience when it comes to love this year. In 2025, you also have two Eclipses in your sign, and there are overall a lot of changes Virgos are moving through this year. Your main guidance for love is to stand by the things that serve your heart and release yourself from what burdens it.
LIBRA
Love is coming to fruition for you this year, Libra. You have been through a lot in your personal life these past few years, and walking into 2025, you are ready for some positive change. This is a year of feeling in balance with your personal goals and dreams, and what you are experiencing romantically and financially as well. Relationship dynamics are serving you and your sense of abundance, and many gifts are coming your way in love this year.
With Neptune, Chiron, and Saturn all being in your 7th house of love, your love life and partnerships are the main focus for you in 2025.
You are moving through changes, overcoming previous obstacles, and bringing back the dreamy energy here. With Chiron in the 7th, you are still doing some healing of the heart, but with Neptune now entering, it all feels a little more romantic and spiritual at the same time. This year is about believing in the impossible in love, taking care of yourself, and allowing someone else to take care of you as well.
SCORPIO
This year is all about opportunity when it comes to love, Scorpio. You have your eyes on the prize and are focused on what you want for yourself, but also how you want to show up for love as well. You have goals and intentions that you are setting for your love life this year, and a lot of them reflect the passion and strength you are feeling as you enter the year. Vesta is in your sign this year until September, and you have a spark within you that is a magnet for success and love. You are walking forward confidently and are feeling inspired, sexy, and magical this year.
This is a very sensual and powerful year for you, and this energy is being reflected in the relationship experiences you are having. Jupiter also enters your 9th house of adventure halfway through the year, and there is something special about the trips you are taking and the risks you are taking in love. Overall, this is a year of doing things your way and attracting love to you through your inner confidence and charisma.
SAGITTARIUS
This is a beautiful year of feeling balanced and abundant in love, Sagittarius. There is a lot of energy coming in and you are giving a lot of love as well. This sense of synergy you are feeling within your love life this year has a lot to do with Juno, the asteroid of soulmates, in your sign from Feb. 19 - Apr. 15. Your people are coming in and you have options this year, Sag.
This is a year of feeling loved for the inspiring, outgoing, and unique being you are, and meeting more people who match your energy.
Saturn also enters your 5th house of romance this year, and you are learning a lot through your experiences with others. You are learning how to be more confident in who you are and what you want for yourself and also recognizing the importance of making more time for fun and playful experiences. This is the year to see love as a more light-hearted experience and to not take yourself too seriously.
CAPRICORN
You are letting things come to you when it comes to love this year, Capricorn. You are feeling beautiful, capable, and worthy, and you are receiving the gifts that come from this sense of confidence and patience. This past year, you were setting a lot of new goals for yourself and your relationships, and in 2025, you are experiencing the results of these efforts.
Jupiter moves into your sister sign Cancer from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, and enters your 7th house of love, partnerships, romance, marriage, and harmony. Your love life and experience of it all are expanding this year, and benevolent Jupiter is sending blessings to this area of your life. This is a year of things coming full circle for you in love, and you feel less confused about it all and more sure of yourself and what is becoming for you here.
AQUARIUS
Love is a highlight for you this year, Aquarius. You are coming together with another, and many Aquarius’ will be forming new relationships or growing within a strong relationship. You are experiencing the fruition of your dreams in love, and are also able to heal and let go of past emotional experiences that have been overwhelming for you in the past.
The North Node enters your 12th house of closure this year, and you are motivated towards change, cleaning house, and releasing the cobwebs of the past.
You are walking into new emotional experiences with less baggage and self-doubt, and are experiencing a fresh start in love. This is a year of asking for what you need emotionally and receiving it. Love is coming in for you in harmonious and magical ways, and you are rewriting your story in love in 2025.
PISCES
You are moving through a lot of changes when it comes to love in 2025, Pisces. This is a year of closure, healing, and giving yourself a fresh start, and the way you enter the year will be a lot different than the way you end it. The North Node of Destiny enters your sign this year, and the South Node of Karma enters your 7th house of love. So, a lot of your focus this year is on your personal goals and path, and there may be some neglect or lack of focus on your relationships.
This can create some discord with those close to you, and your guidance for this year is to try to balance the personal successes and wins you are experiencing, with the love changes that also need your attention right now. Know that what leaves your life this year is being replaced by something better, and also know that your healing doesn’t need to have a timeline and you can take as much time as you need to grow. Overall, you are turning a new page in love in 2025.
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Dating men of higher social status shortened my tolerance for a lot of things I was convinced were normal. I blamed the universe for attracting undesirable men when it was my fault for allowing undesirable behavior. An interesting dichotomy between those guys and sugar daddies was the treatment I accepted.
It was easier to put my foot down with men of opulence because their privilege meant there was no limit to meeting my desires. Plus, recognizing my own worth made them (the good ones) want to treat me with the same high regard.
I’ll admit you don’t NEED to be an SB to enhance your dating style, but that’s the path I journeyed. It taught me how to be gracefully tough on men based on the simple fact that I’m invaluable. I’ll never convince anyone to be an SB, but feel free to pick a few gems I learned that might take your 2025 dating style to the next level.
Don’t overdo it by showing gratitude.
Let’s stop praising men for the bare minimum.
Yes, it’s okay to make a man feel affirmed but don’t let those affirmations come off too intensely, especially for things that require minimal effort. Don’t tell him about your ex never opening the passenger door for you, don’t brag about him being "The One" because he texted to make sure you got home safely, and most definitely don’t offer up the cat just because he paid a $150 dinner bill (give it because you want to, not out of obligation).
To be honest, I barely even say thank you when a man finds me attractive. “You are so beautiful.” I would respond, “Aww, you’re so sweet.” When he holds the door open, I graze his arm and smile.
Showing too much excitement about the bare minimum strokes his ego and draws a ceiling, which he doesn’t feel he needs to surpass. It tells him you’re not used to regular treatment, so you’ll be grateful for anything. Why do more than necessary? I like my men reflecting at the end of our date, thinking, “What can I do to impress her?”
Don’t stop having manners, though. Just keep it simple and move on.
There’s no such thing as “dating for potential.”
Hold my hand with this one.
There comes a time when the word “potential” shouldn’t be a part of your dating vocabulary. It’s nothing more than the encouragement of false hope. He’s not flaky with time because his schedule is too busy between balancing family and work. It’s because you’re not important enough to prioritize making time for.
He’s not stingy on dates because he’s having a rough time handling all his financial responsibilities. It’s because he’d rather spend his money on things that don’t involve you.
Trust me when I say men don’t date with potential in mind. Many of them hold themselves in very high regard with an “I can do better” mindset, and so should you. There’s A LOT of weight in the saying, “If he wanted to he would.” So stay away from Mr. Shoulda Coulda Woulda because, at the end of the day, he didn’t.
*P.S. If he ever says he doesn’t deserve you, he’s not being sheepishly humble. Take his word for it and run.
Do NOT be afraid to say no.
How many times have you put yourself through something you didn’t want to do based on feeling obligated? You compromised yourself in order to please the person you’re dating because it seemed like the easier option. Let me just remind you of the old saying, “Nothing good in life comes easy.”
I like comparing men to children, not to demean them but to draw similarities. Children often like to push and see how much they can get away with until the parent says no. Once you allow them to get away with one thing, they’ll nudge the limits to see how often they can skate by.
Dating is just like this. Get comfortable giving rejection. It can be an uncomfortable concept for some, so consider saying no and following it with a light reason. For example, “Do you want to come over and watch Netflix?” “No, I don’t feel comfortable going to strangers’ houses.” If his response is anything but understanding with a Plan B, on to the next.
Those boundaries were created to protect you. Any man who respects you will respect them too.
Don’t lay all your cards on the table.
When a man asks, “So what exactly are you looking for?” The vaguest response comes to mind.
It’s a common mistake to think men (not all) ask questions for unselfish reasons. That one, especially, is basically like asking for cheat codes to a game. Describing your idea of a perfect man, dating intentions, etc. allows him to know who he needs to morph himself into in order to get what he wants. Enter love bombing, physical intimacy, delusions of potential, then ghosting.
I’ve said the below on a few first dates and wasn’t surprised by how quickly the guys weeded themselves out.
"I’ve been having fun figuring things out as time goes on. There are times when I love going out to meet new people and times when I love cuddling up on the couch. It depends on how I’m feeling.”
I just said a whole lotta nothing, leaving it up to him to decipher. It’s open-ended, which forces him to show his intentions and let things play out naturally with as little manipulation as possible.
The first date defines how he views you.
This is where all those conversations leading up to this day come into play.
The perfect first date doesn’t only have to consist of 5-star dining and lavish wine collections. Those are merely perks. The perfect first date is valued based on how much effort he put in to show he’s been listening.
You’ve been dropping subtle hints that tulips are your favorite flowers. Did he show up empty-handed? You shared your discomfort with driving to far places at night. Did he book a 9 p.m. reservation somewhere 30 minutes away? You told him about your new venture into veganism. Did he take you to his favorite steakhouse?
These aren’t small things and they’re DEFINITELY not things for you to take on as a challenge. These could be easy signs of a life full of selfishness and laziness if shrugged off by the belief you should be satisfied with him making time for you.
Will taking my advice find you a husband faster? Who knows? But, ultimately, dating isn’t supposed to be an earnest search for a man. It should be a time of personal growth while sorting through experiences to find a partner who will appreciate the valuable woman you are.
Having high standards for yourself doesn’t make you difficult or unreasonable. To the right man, it definitely won’t make you undateable. Like I said before, nothing good in life comes easy.
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