

Lower back tension is a common issue that many women experience. The lower back, also known as the lumbar region, is particularly prone to tension and discomfort due to various factors such as poor posture, sedentary lifestyles, pregnancy, and postpartum, as well as everyday stress — and all those knots and kinks have to get worked out someway.
We sit for long periods of time between working and commuting, and sometimes our posture can be an afterthought until we notice an ache that surfaces over time. This form of discomfort often manifests as pain or stiffness and can be a source of discomfort that can affect our daily activities, sleep, and overall mobility. By addressing and relieving the tension, you can experience a significant reduction in pain and lead a more active and fulfilling life.
It’s important to listen to your body when aches, soreness, and tension arise. Lucky for us, there are various methods to relieve lower back tension, including regular exercise, stretching, yoga, and massage. And to help you get on your way to tension-free living, we have included a set of stretches specifically designed to alleviate those aches in your lower body.
1.Sphinx Pose
@theliberatedyogi Sphinx Pose for Day 3 of the #AffirmandAwaken challenge. It’s appropriate that today is hump day and that our affirmations today center around healing. I chose a baby back bend pose because it’s what my body needed today. Remember that yoga is not a competition. Affirmations for healing: 🙏🏾I am capable of healing 🙏🏾I can access tools and resources to support my healing 🙏🏾 My greatest healing comes from within 🙏🏾I embrace my healing journey Affirmations are statements that can help you to challenge and overcome self-sabotaging and negative thoughts. Research shows that positive affirmations can help change thought patterns and influence different behavioral changes for the better. 💡 Hosts: @sacredspacesyoga @raveenalexis @cryswic @_vibeswithjas @theliberatedyogi 💡 Pose Line Up: Hip Opener - Relationships Inversions - Self Love Backbend - Healing Balancing - Courage Heart Opener - Success It’s not too late to join us for this #AffirmAndAwaken challenge on IG. Come on! #liberationyoga #blackgirlmagic #blackyogateachers
2.“The Windshield Wiper”
@hellobojja Feel a release throughout the lower back - this will also create space across the thighs as your bringing movement to the legs - if you hear cracking keep going unless you feel pain, not to be confused with tension or pressure HOW Lay stomach down, arms in front of you with the forehead directly on the hands. Shoulder, hip bones and knees should all be in one line - bend the knee and bring the toes up to the sky - with light force drop the feet side to side . . . #hellobojja #fyp #stretchy #onthisday
3.Child's Pose
@laurenj.williams 8 Step Child’s Pose Preparation #fyp #foryoupage #yogaforbeginners #childspose
4.Cat/Cow
@itssydneynoelle a daily practice of cat/cow circles can do wonders for our bodies & here are a few reasons why! ✨ #catcowpose #catcowcircles #sacralchakraopening #blackgirlyogi #dailyyogapractice #dailymovement #spineactivation #movementismedicine
5.Downward-Facing Dog
@yogawithkrissyjay ✨Yoga Demo: Chataraunga, Upward Facing Dog, Downward Facing Dog✨ #yoga #yogagirl #yogaflow #yogi #blackyogi #blackgirlsdoyoga #fitness #mindfulness #meditation #yogalife #yogapractice #yogapose #yogapants
6.Needle and Thread
@samm_yv Tight back? I got you ! 🖐🏾✨ #yogatips #divinefeminine #learnontiktok #yogapose #selfcare #wellnessroutine #neckpain #spineflexibility #flexibility #fyp
7.Happy Baby
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Cavan Images/Getty Images
Aley Arion is a writer and digital storyteller from the South, currently living in sunny Los Angeles. Her site, yagirlaley.com, serves as a digital diary to document personal essays, cultural commentary, and her insights into the Black Millennial experience. Follow her at @yagirlaley on all platforms!
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
Did You Know That Certain Traits In Men Can Make It Easier For You To Orgasm?
Recently, while doing a podcast interview on how God, love, and sex all work together, I shared something that I find myself saying quite a bit to church folks (whenever those topics, together, come up): “The main purpose of sex is not procreation, it’s oneness. Adam and Eve did not procreate until after they left the Garden of Eden. They had sex prior to that, though.” (Genesis 2:24-25, Genesis 4:1)
The reason why I think that this is relevant to today’s topic is, as I was doing some research for it, I found myself rolling my eyes quite a bit as I read things like “men need to orgasm in order to release sperm; women don’t need an orgasm to conceive” and “Why do women orgasm? It’s still a mystery.” Umm, is it? Because if you factor in the oneness component that I just mentioned (which more people should take to heart if you ask me) and then add to that the fact that the ONLY purpose of a clitoris is sexual stimulation and satisfaction for a woman — female climaxing and the need for it to happen as much as possible should baffle absolutely no one.
Sex serves a layer of benefits and yes, for both men and women, pleasure should be one of them. And since that is the case, a woman being able to orgasm, as much as she can, should be promoted…in content on a consistent basis.
And that is why I thought some of you might find it interesting that there are certain things about men, specifically, that science says can increase the chances of you climaxing — not only more but more intensely too.
Let’s dive in.
How Masculine a Man Is
I’m gonna be honest: All of the women out here who give pushback on submission and yet want a man to physically look up to (you know, someone who is 6’ or over which is only 15 percent of the male US population, by the way) fascinate me. So, you want a man who towers over you yet you think it is antiquated for a man to lead you? Do tell. Anyway, that is the first thing I thought about when I read that a man’s level of masculinity plays a significant role in how often a woman is able to orgasm and how quickly she is able to do it.
It would appear that some of the backstory on this is, on the physical tip, men with strong jawlines and broad shoulders represent being in good health as well as being able to protect their family while research also reveals that men with beards make many women believe that they would be good fathers. And yes, as much as social media may say — or scream — otherwise, women tend to prefer dominant (exerting authority or influence) men more as well. All of this together, in the bedroom, results in more and faster orgasms for women. Fascinating.
A Man’s Personality
A sense of humor in a man can really take him a long way in life — including when it comes to giving women orgasms. That’s why articles like “Funny Men Give The Best Orgasms, According To Research” exist. Although it’s probably a given that a lot of us are drawn to this character trait because it makes us feel good, research also says that humor taps into our creativity, makes it easier for us to adapt to things, and can help us to be better problem-solvers too.
Sexually, I would think that being funny helps because humor and orgasms both provide dopamine hits which is the feel-good hormone that runs throughout our bodies. While we’re on this topic, other personality traits that will make you cum more when it comes to men include being creative, warm, and faithful — gee, imagine that. #sarcasm
Also, a Man’s Self-Esteem
I’m pretty sure it doesn’t surprise you in the least that the more intense your orgasms are with a guy, the more attractive you’ll find him to be and the more willing you’ll be to have sex with him multiple times a week. Yeah, y’all be careful with this one because something else that science says is whenever a really good orgasm comes your way, as a woman, your brain literally switches all the way off for a moment (which could explain a lot when it comes to who some people choose to deal with out here…just sayin’). Anyway, apparently it would seem that a truly confident man is who’s able to pull all of this off.
That makes sense because confidence is all about having a high sense of self-worth; embracing challenges; not having a lot of self-doubt; listening well to others; standing firm on one’s own beliefs; putting plans into action, and taking control of one’s life. Plus, since a lot of women will admit that they prefer a man to be a provider and protector, which in turn causes them to feel safe, and feeling safe also makes it easier to let go and enjoy sex fully — yes, all of this tracks.
Foreskin
If no one else will say it, I WILL: the double standard on foreskin vs. the extra skin that a lot of women have when it comes to their vulva is absolutely ridiculous. In fact, if you know some things about your clitoris, it’s constructed a lot like a mini-penis in the sense of it experiences an erection of sorts when it’s aroused and the clitoral hood is the clitoris’s “foreskin.” So, to be out here giving the “ick” to men for how they were born when some of us have large or hanging lips — yeah, let’s chill on that.
Besides, according to science, “uncut men” not only have a greater level of sensation during sex, but that extra bit of skin (which isn’t as much as a lot of y’all make it out to be…relax) actually gives women more consistent orgasms too. Don’t believe me? Read this here and this here.
If He Ejaculates
I dunno. If you’re not a selfish partner, this one seems like common sense because, if a man “completes the act”, that means he was able to “get his” and that seems like something any good lover would want for their partner (the only thing better? Experiencing it with him at the same time!). However, what I did find interesting is there’s a greater chance that a woman will orgasm herself if she knows that her partner came.
In fact, one study said that a little over 50 percent of women thought that it was very important that their partner ejaculated during sex while a little over 22 percent said that they experienced more intense orgasms if he came during intercourse.
Some studies say that the sensation of the sperm inside of the vagina may play a role in this; however, since that means that you must engage in unprotected sex (check out “Thinking About Going Condom-Free? Read This Before You Do.”) in order to vouch for this one…I’ll just say to use forethought, wisdom and definitely get tested before attempting it.
BONUS: How Your Friends See Him
The more you learn, boy. Have any of you heard of the sexy son hypothesis before? The gist is this: If you create children with someone who other women find attractive, the belief is that you will end up having sons who have that same quality. And yes, being with someone who you think is appealing to other women — seems to increase the chances of you having an orgasm too (chile).
___
Hmph. It’s intel like this that explains why so many think pieces say that the brain is the most powerful sex organ that we have. Anyway, if you’re someone who wants to have more orgasms or more intense orgasms, perhaps take some of this data to heart. For all you know, it might be the blueprint that you’ve been looking for all along.
Thoughts? Comments. Confirmations? LOL.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Giphy