Robert Christopher Riley is hot off the screen just as much as he is on.
Scroll through his Instagram and photos of his chocolate abs and well-groomed beard may have you salivating at work. Amongst his 121,000 followers are women commenting, "Jesus why is he so perfect?" and "He's my #MCM (man crush Monday) every week." One would assume that all of this praise and celebrity would go to Riley's head. However, having known him for several years, prior to the premiere of Hit The Floor, he remains just as humble and gracious as ever.
The star of VH1's nearly too hot for TV scripted series Hit The Floor plays Terrence Wall, a pro-ball player and professional thirst trap--and just our luck, most of his scenes require him to be shirtless. The series follows the lives of “The Devil Girls," a fictional professional dance team for pro basketball team Los Angeles Devils, as they navigate the cut throat world of sports and entertainment. After two successful seasons, the series went on an impromptu hiatus and won't return until 2016, however, the break hasn't fazed Riley who is beyond busy running two companies focused on production and photography.
Before stepping onto the Hollywood scene, the classically trained thespian received his Masters in Fine Arts from Ohio University and spent time on Broadway as an understudy for Terrence Howard in Cat On A Hot Tin Roof, which also starred Phylicia Rashad and James Earl Jones. When Riley made his transition into television, his first role was on Law & Order: Criminal Intent.
Having already lived a full and exciting life in his 20s, Riley has a wealth of wisdom to share with xoNecole readers about having personal and professional success in your 30s. If you ladies are wondering if Riley is single, yes, he is. Feel free to slide into his DMs, but you have to come correct.
"You need a certain level of intelligence that's closely akin to mine just so neither of us feels inferior to each other," he says. "We need to have relatively the same amount of book and street smarts. At this point in my life she needs to be capable of raising a family. And I'm not talking about her cooking and cleaning for me when I get home, I can do those things."
Whoa! Mind blown--an educated man with two degrees who's an entrepreneur that also cooks and cleans...yes, please! What else is Riley looking for in a relationship? Keep reading on…
xoNecole: What did your mother teach you about relationships and how does that play a role in the type of women you pursue?
RR: My mother led more by example. We never sat down and had the “birds and the bees" conversation. She was a very strong and independent woman; she did everything for herself because it was no one else to do it for her. She left my father when I was maybe two years old because he was abusive and not a good man by my standards of what a man is supposed to be. Looking at my mother as an example of what a woman is capable of unfortunately has created some very high expectations for the women I've dated.
If I think you're beautiful, that's step one. You've got to be willing to do what it takes to raise a family and for me it's about playing whatever role is necessary. Sometimes the father is the comforting one and sometimes the mother has to be stern. There are some households where the women is the breadwinner and whoever is involved in that relationship can't make the other person feel like shit because they make less.
I'm single right now, but I'm also not interested in just dating for the sake of it. As my great aunt would say, "Everybody needs a little comfort,' but don't mistake comfort for your life partner."
At this point in my life if I'm going to associate with someone, there's going to be some major questions within the first couple dates that if they aren't answered properly we either have to figure it out or it isn't going to work.
xoNecole: What's your advice for women who are ready for a relationship but keep meeting guys who say they're too busy on their “hustle" and their “grind" to date.
RR: Appreciate their honesty! Whether you're a man or a woman, if you're not ready for a relationship, don't do it! A lot of people confuse what they want with what they need. You may want a boyfriend and someone to share your world with, but that may not be what you need right now. What you need is someone who's supportive, who's happy with you doing what's best for you, which sometimes means letting you go. It's sad, but they might be doing you a favor.
I would love to be in a relationship right now, but if the person wasn't exactly what I needed, it would be like a sandbag weighing me down. You don't want to unnecessarily concern yourself with someone that won't add value to your life. There are other ways to surround yourself with people who will give you the same support you think you need from a romantic relationship. Surround yourself with genuine people that you know will always have your back and that doesn't necessarily have to be your boyfriend or girlfriend. That mindset definitely takes some getting used to, and it might mean some lonely nights, but I'll take that as opposed to getting attached to the wrong person. You have to think big picture whenever you get sad and lonely but there are few people that I know who get married at a young age that are still together because you don't know who you are; some people do, God Bless them. But most people don't.
[Tweet "You need time to figure yourself out before you can add someone else to the equation."]
xoNecole: So many actors have the assumption that once they secure a leading role on a TV show, they're financially set. Can you give some insight on the importance of saving your money as well as continuing to hustle during your show's hiatus?
RR: You've got to figure out something to do that doesn't involve you waiting for someone else. For me it's my production company, Hollywood Massive, and my photography company, Fresh Perspectives. Hit The Floor has been great. Season two aired in 2014. We had a marathon in January but the new season isn't premiering until 2016.
For the fans that still love the show and are waiting for it to come back, God bless you. We're hoping that you'll still be there. Undoubtedly we'll have to get a whole new crop of new fans, run some more marathons of seasons one and two and hopefully get people re-interested and re-acclimated to the show. You can't count your chickens before they hatch.
xoNecole: So once an actor books a show they shouldn't buy a house and a Lamborghini?
RR: Nope! And it takes a while to figure that out. Because chances are, if you're like the majority of us, you've spent so long trying to get your big break that once it happens, you just want to celebrate. A lot of people don't understand why these rappers and athletes are throwing money in peoples faces, making it rain in clubs and buying so much expensive stuff; it's because they've spent their entire lives not doing it and now they're like, 'it's my turn!' Oftentimes, that's what gets you into some financial trouble. It's so much easier said than done to realize that things aren't financially solid once you get on a TV show. Now if you've been on a series for several seasons then it gets picked up in syndication and you get one of those checks, that's a different story. But that person may also have a family and other responsibilities and still need other sources of income.
For younger actors who haven't gotten to that particular point in their career that they've been dreaming about, realize that it's a very long road, don't be too quick to celebrate. Being successful is one thing but it's being a “celebrity" that'll get you in trouble. I always put “celebrity" in air quotes when I'm talking about myself. I'll be the first to tell you, I'm a regular person, I just have an interesting job that people like. The best thing you can do as an up-and-coming actor, whenever you decide that you've made it, is take sixty seconds to realize you don't own the network. They could stop running the show whenever they want they can also not hire you back. No one is bigger than any series; understand that this is a business and you have to be prepared for the ups and the downs. You have to realize who you are and what you've been sent here to do and hopefully, it's a little bit bigger than just entertaining people.
xoNecole: What is “Hollywood Massive" and why was it important to you to help people of Afro-Caribbean descent get in touch with their roots?
RR: Hollywood Massive is a production company and a movement. I'm [a] first-generation American. My mom is from Trinidad and my father was from Barbados. Not to long ago, I was trying to figure out what made me the happiest and also what made me different and it turned out to be the same thing, the fact that I'm Caribbean! It was Soca, it was Carnival, curry chicken, ginger beer and all these different things that I loved growing up. Between public school and college, I felt like the love of my culture was thrown on the back burner. It's not that I was pretending, but I felt like I was hiding a part of myself. So now I'm sharing it with people. I know so many people that aren't Caribbean that love the culture and I wanted to share it with as many people as possible-- appreciation without appropriation.
My company produces carnivals, we will cover cultural events and I use my platform as a “celebrity" to bring this movement to an audience that hasn't previously had this experience. I'm striving to be a bridge and stretch my arms as wide as I can and bring a lot of different people together while simultaneously making people proud of me. If there's one young person in Trinidad or Barbados that thinks they can make something of themselves as a result of me, I'm all for that. I also represent Flatbush, and I want to give kids in Brooklyn some one to look up to.
xoNecole: What are some things you know for sure about resilience and perseverance that you would share would someone that's in the midst of a challenging time?
RR: Stay off of social media. It can make you feel like you're not worth anything, like you're not making enough of the right moves. As a photographer, I know a photo is literally a moment in someone's life, you don't know what it took to get there. The person posing in front of the expensive car may be behind on their payments. You don't if the person showing off their nice house can really afford it, it might be going into foreclosure. Don't worry about what someone else is doing; focus on the competition against yourself. If someone tells you your dream is too big, chances are they couldn't do it themselves.
Believe in yourself and make sure your team is strong, take inventory and cut dead weight whenever necessary.
At the end of the day you should be able to look yourself in the mirror and be proud of what you've done. Make sure you're not doing it just for you because when you're gone what's left? Are you just working towards getting a star on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame? Work towards building a school or mentor some kids, give some type of reciprocation to the world. You don't have to be rich to do something charitable, you just have to understand your power as a human being then go do something impactful.
Featured image by Paras Griffin/Getty Images
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Alaska Wasn’t On My Bucket List, But My Glacier Adventure Made Me A Believer
We all have bucket list destinations at the top of our lists. I visited one of those at the top of 2024: Japan! But what happens when you get an opportunity to go someplace that wasn’t on it? For me, that was Alaska. Now, I’d submitted my short film to the Anchorage International Film Festival, genuinely thinking it would be a long shot to get in with a short film about fibroids and Black women’s health.
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
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Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert