Ever since you were a little girl, you've probably had a favorite color. Even if it was pink or purple when you were young and now that you're grown, it's something that's more in line with red, yellow or a neutral hue – have you ever thought about why you gravitate to those shades?
If your response is a Kanye shrug followed by "I dunno. I just do." that's probably what most folks would say. But as I was trying to figure out why I like the colors that I do — these days, it's shades of blue, grey, and brown — I did a little research on color psychology. It actually revealed a lot.
See, the thing about me and color is our relationship is ever-changing. Right now, I'm in a season in my life where I'm focusing on peace, consistency, and figuring out who is truly reliable in my life. And lo and behold, check what blue, grey and brown symbolize:
Blue:
- serenity
- wisdom
- loyalty
- truth
Grey:
- reliability
- dignity
- maturity
- dependability
Brown:
- stability
- friendship
- comfort
- natural
Crazy, right?! Just to make sure this wasn't a random coincidence, I thought about how a couple of years ago, I was really into the color green. At the time, I was focused on doing things to improve my health. And green? It's all about that.
Green:
- growth
- health
- harmony
- fertility
- money
That got me to thinking about actor Lisa Raye and the fact that, more times than not, she's in all-white. I did a little digging around to remind myself of why she does that. When she first started doing it, she said that it made her feel like an angel. Then, once she wore white to her father's funeral, she realized that white complemented her personality of going against the grain; of marching to the beat of her own drum. Her story, in combination with my own, was enough for me not to be a skeptic of color psychology anymore. There had to be something to it.
Before thinking about how various colors reflected wherever my mind was at any given point in time, I pretty much only thought about color psychology as it related to establishing a business brand (a good read is "How to Use Color Psychology to Give Your Business an Edge"). But as I kept reading articles on the topic, I got that it really does have a lot of power and influence on our psyches.
Take yellow, for example. How do you feel whenever you see it? Probably brighter and happier.
That's just what yellow symbolizes. Or what about red? When you want to look and feel sexy, it's probably one of your go-to hues. After all, nothing is hotter than the perfect shade of red lipstick. Red is the color of love, passion, and desire.
There are even studies that say the color that you choose to wear can totally alter your attitude for that day.
For instance, if you wake up in a bad mood, you should probably put on a cool color like blue, purple or green because it will help to keep you calm and centered.
On the other hand, if you have a first date coming up and you want to make a bold impression, go with something warm like orange or red. If you've got a job interview, making a good impression before saying a word by wearing black (it signifies leadership), blue (it conveys being a team leader), or a shade of grey (it represents being a responsible person and logical thinker). Or, if you're somewhere you know your ex is gonna be, rock some purple. You probably know that it symbolizes royalty, but it also represents respect, wisdom, spirituality, sophistication, and mystery.
Am I saying that colors and what they symbolize should run your life? No. Nothing should do that. I'm simply saying that colors affect us more than most of us probably think that it does.
And, thanks to my own color psychology experience, I'm suggesting that whatever colors you gravitate to, you might have a couple of your own a-ha moments if you do some digging into what they represent. By the way, another cool read is "Color Psychology: Does It Affect How You Feel?".
Once you get started, it might cause you to see some commonalities among the people you know, based on the colors they're the most attracted to as well.
Anyway, just some cool food for thought. Life is vivid. Live it in (semi-well-thought out) color!
Featured image by Getty Images.
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- The Color Yellow | Psychology Today ›
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Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and SkylarCj Hart @hartbreakToday, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak