

A couple of years ago, I wrote an article for the site entitled, "Why You Should Stop Faking Orgasms ASAP". I'm pretty sure that you can tell from the title that I'm not particularly a fan of faking it. In fact, back in my "getting it in" days, I would have no problem letting a guy know that if he needed more motivation (cue Kelly Rowland) to get me to where I wanted to go. I was down for that more than acting like he was doing what needed to be done.
Still, between all of the counseling that I do, the conversations that I've had and the research that I've done, I am more than just a little bit aware that a whopping 80 percent of women have faked orgasms and 1 out of 4 guys do it too (just because a man ejaculates, that doesn't mean he climaxed; that's another topic for another time, though).
Taking all of this intel into account, I figured that now would be just a good of a time as any to ask some women why they opt to fake it because, as you're about to see, as with most things in life, faking orgasms isn't really a simple black-and-white or cut-and-dried issue. Not by a long shot.
(By the way, I didn't go by middle names this time. The women chose the names themselves. Due to the sensitivity of the topic, I'm pretty sure you can understand why.)
Why Do Women Fake Orgasms?
Gayle, 33. Single.
"I'm gonna be real with you — I fake most of the time because while the men I'm having sex with tell me how good my stuff is, I'm usually not all that impressed with their performance. So, the quickest and easiest way to bring intercourse to a close is to fake it. Otherwise, they'll get to the point of releasing, only to pull out and the cycle starts all over again. Who has time for that?"
Mya. 24. Engaged.
"My issue is there's only one man who has made me cum and it's not my fiancé. And when I cum, girl? It is loud, long, and ugly! Not only that but it takes some pretty, let's go with unconventional thinking, to really get me there and I'm uncomfortable sharing what those acts are with my man. I think it's just easier to fake it than to fully expose myself like that. Also, I've been faking for this long that if my man knew that, I'd be in for some long discussions that I don't want to have. At least not yet."
Leeyah. 28. Married.
"My deal is that I cum, every time, with oral sex. My hubby is the master at that. His stroke? Not so much. He's kind of sensitive about his sexual performance overall and so I figure, so long as I gets mine one way or another, faking can't hurt. Can it?"
Bethaney. 40. Divorced.
"What's crazy is a part of the reason why I'm divorced now is because I used to fake it with my husband. For years, I would, and then, one vacation, he hit my spot…girl, he hit my spot! Because I hadn't reacted quite that way before, he was like, 'Hold up. Have you been faking it all this time?' which led to conversations about trust which opened up Pandora's box about a whole lot of issues. Faking it is a complicated thing."
Angelia. 27. Dating.
"I've been faking it, pretty much ever since I lost my virginity. With the first guy, I didn't know what the hell was going on; all I knew was my friends were always talking about how great orgasms felt and so I thought there would be something wrong with me if I didn't 'play the role.' Then, it just kinda stuck. I do enjoy sex a lot but to this day, I'm not sure if I've ever had an orgasm before. I'm so used to faking it that it's just…a part of who I am."
Jasmina. 45. Married.
"Chile, fake it until you make it — that's my motto! See, I have a system. My husband gets off on me getting off and so, the more I fake having an orgasm from intercourse, the more he'll give me head, and [the] head is what actually gets me there. So, technically, do I even qualify for this interview? Anyway, if any of your readers find themselves in the same boat, I highly recommend my strategy. Faking one way can get you just what you want in other ways."
Eryn. 36. Divorced.
"My reason is probably not a very surprising one. I don't really have sex for the orgasms. I like the intimacy and closeness. I actually can go months without having sex and be just fine with it. But I know men like to feel like they've 'shook the floor,' so I'll fake it so that I can cuddle once it's over. Might sound sad but it's fine with me."
Gem. 35. Dating.
"This is gonna sound weird but it's my truth. There is a man who I've been having sex with for over a decade now. We're long-distance. We don't really want the same things out of life. Real talk, we're not all that compatible except for in the bedroom. There, he's my soulmate. I've been used to having great sex with him for so long that I think there's a 'block' when it comes to me and other men because no matter how hard they try — we both try — I just can't seem to get there with anyone but him. So, I fake it because I don't want to share what I just told you with anyone. I've gotten so used to it that it doesn't even bother me anymore."
Zen. 47. Married.
"OK, I don't fake it all of the time. Well, yes and no. I fake quickies. When you're married and parenting and busy, you don't always have 30 minutes for real foreplay and intercourse. To keep my husband satisfied, I'll oblige a couple of quickies a week to boost his confidence and yes, I'll act like he's blowing my entire back out. Then, when we have time to really get it in, I'll have real orgasms. I'm not sure if he can tell the difference and I sure as hell ain't gonna ask him."
Nina. 39. Dating.
"I don't fake having orgasms; I fake having multiple orgasms. If a man thinks that he can give you those from the start, girl, you will have his ego soaring so much that he'll be down to do whatever you want to do — in and out of the bedroom. So, the first round, I'll shake, yell 'n everything and then when I'm like 'lick my ass,' he's down for it because he wants to see me cum again and again. Faking has some real upsides. You've just gotta know how to work the program." (She literally winked at me after she said it.)
Like I said, faking it has layers and while it's still not something that I'm personally down to do, I get the method behind the madness and the psyche of some. That said, if you've got some other reasons for why you think faking orgasms can work in a woman's favor, please drop it into the comments. The more we all hear each other out, the more we can learn how to be more honest — at least with ourselves. Right?
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
From '106 & Park' To Prime Time, Rocsi Diaz Is Still That Girl
Rocsi Diaz is no stranger to the camera. From her iconic run on 106 & Park to interviewing Hollywood heavyweights on Entertainment Tonight, she’s been at the center of culture for years. Now, she’s back in the hosting chair alongside none other than Deion “Coach Prime” Sanders for We Got Time Today, a fresh talk show exclusive to Tubi.
The show is exactly what you’d expect when you put a media pro and a sports legend together—a mix of real talk, unfiltered moments, and guest interviews that feel like family kickbacks. As the duo wraps up their first season, Rocsi sat down with xoNecole to talk about teaming up with Deion, the wildest moments on set, and why streaming platforms like Tubi are shaking up the talk show world.
Scoring the Gig & Clicking Instantly with Deion
Photo by Paras Griffin/Getty Images for Essence
Deion Sanders had been dreaming of hosting a talk show, and when Tubi came calling, it was only right he made it happen. But before he found the perfect co-host, he held auditions with different women for the spot.
Lucky for us, Rocsi threw her hat in the ring, and the connection was instant. “You just can’t buy chemistry like we have,” she tells us. “We are legit like big brother, little sister—fighting, cracking jokes, telling each other off. When you watch the show, it’s like watching family.”
Mixing News, Culture & Sports—Minus the Snooze
With We Got Time Today, Rocsi and Deion cover everything from the latest headlines to celebrity tea and, of course, sports. But instead of stiff, rehearsed segments, the show keeps it loose and unpredictable.
“We’re not breaking the mold—it’s not rocket science,” Rocsi jokes. “We just bring our own flair, our authenticity, and our personalities to it. Deion has firsthand experience in sports, so when we talk about athletes, he brings a different perspective.”
And the best part? Unlike traditional talk shows that rush through quick interviews, We Got Time Today actually takes its time. “A lot of shows might give you one or two segments with a guest,” Rocsi says. “With us, we actually sit down and have real-life conversations.”
Her Top Guests (So Far!)
From music icons to relationship experts, the show has already had some unforgettable guests—but a few stand out for Rocsi.
“Ice Cube was our first guest, and he’s just legendary,” she says. “Kirk Franklin had us cracking up when he broke into a full choir freestyle for our Christmas special. And anytime we get Dr. Bryant on to put Deion in the hot seat? That’s my favorite!”
And of course, there’s Nick Cannon. “Nick was amazing,” she adds. “You already know he’s going to bring the energy and say something wild.”
Tag-Team Hosting with Deion: The Inside Scoop
While Deion Sanders is best known for his football greatness, Rocsi says he’s also one of the funniest people she’s ever worked with.
“He’s goofy—like, really goofy,” she laughs. “A lot of people didn’t know that side of him, but now they do. He can crack a joke, and if you’re too sensitive, good luck, because he will go in. But the best part? I throw it right back at him! Sometimes we just look at each other like, ‘Okay, that was a good one.’”
But beyond the laughs, she admires his insane work ethic. “Watching him juggle everything he does is just super admirable,” she says.
How "We Got Time Today" Brings That "106 & Park" Energy
Photo by David Livingston/Getty Images
For those wondering if We Got Time Today feels like 106 & Park 2.0, Rocsi says it’s a whole different vibe.
“The only comparison I’d make is that it’s a destination for the culture,” she explains. “It’s a platform where our people can come, feel safe, and have real conversations. But other than that, this is Deion’s world—we’re just having fun in it.”
The Talk Show Shake-Up: Why This Show Hits Different
Unlike traditional networks, We Got Time Today lives exclusively on Tubi, proving that streaming platforms are changing how we watch talk shows.
“Tubi is giving more people opportunities and making content more accessible,” Rocsi says. “Deion is a huge Tubi fan—he literally loves Black cinema—so it just made sense for him. And honestly? He’s got me watching it too!”
Real Ones Only: Women Holding Each Other Down
Rocsi credits her best friend, Chantelle, for always keeping her grounded. “She kept pouring into me, reminding me of who I am,” she shares. Even Deion Sanders makes sure to give her flowers, often calling her “the hostess with the most.”
In the industry, she’s built lasting bonds with women like Julissa Bermundez, Angie Martinez, and Angela Yee. “Julissa and I still kick it—her house is basically Sephora, so I just shop there,” she jokes. She also cherishes her friendships with Melyssa Ford and Robin Roberts, who have offered unwavering support. “Robin has always been there for me,” Rocsi says, reflecting on the wisdom she’s gained from the legendary journalist.
With the show’s first season wrapping up, Rocsi is grateful for the experience and excited for what’s next. “We’re having a good time, and the audience can feel that,” she says.
And if you haven’t tuned in yet? Well, Rocsi and Deion got time—so you might as well make some too.
Catch We Got Time Today now streaming on Tubi!
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Coconut Water, Papaya Masks, Bone Broth & 7 Other 'Edible' Skincare Recipes To Try Out
I don’t know about you, but there have been dozens of times (at least) when I’ve heard that when it comes to narrowing down what beauty products I should use, “If you can’t eat it, don’t apply it.”
Although I do think that there should be a bit of nuance that’s applied to that type of resolve, I must admit that I do get the overall point because, when you’re trying to give your skin the best possible pampering and care, the less chemicals that you apply, ultimately, the better. Plus, there are so many things that are even in our own refrigerators that can make our skin look radiantly flawless.
10 of those things are listed down below. And although each of them can benefit you, health-wise, in a myriad of different ways, today we’re going to solely focus on how all of them can be relied upon to get your skin into the kind of condition that you’ve always wanted it to be.
1. Coconut Water Serum
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If you want to get a bit more potassium or antioxidants in your system, coconut water can make that happen. Since potassium is something that helps to keep hydration in your skin and antioxidants are awesome at slowing down the signs of aging, these are already two wonderful reasons to consume coconut water consistently. Aside from that, coconut water is also good for your skin because it contains antimicrobial properties that help to prevent breakouts, plus, it is a solid source of vitamin C which helps to boost collagen production so that your skin has more elasticity.
Wanna hydrate your skin from the outside in? Check out this Coconut Water and Jojoba Oil recipehere.
2. Papaya Masks
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A fruit that also contains a lot of vitamin C and antioxidants is papaya. It also has an impressive amount of Vitamin A in it which is good to know becausevitamin A is a nutrient that can help reduce skin sagging, decrease hyperpigmentation, and even soothe the symptoms that are associated with psoriasis. Since papaya features properties that also fight inflammation, it can help to speed up the healing process of pimples and, if you’re looking forfree radicals to stay far away from your skin, papaya can do that for you as well.
Looking for a gentle way to exfoliate your skin while soothing any skin irritation that you may have at the same time? Check out this DIY Papaya Maskhere.
3. Bone Broth
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I am someone who enjoys cooking withbone broth. If you’ve always wondered exactly what it is, bone broth is simply the nutrients that come from animal bones after they’ve been soaking in water for a long period of time.Since bone broth is packed with everything from protein and calcium to magnesium and amino acids, it’s definitely something that can give your skin a boost of health from the inside out. Specifically, the amino acids in bone broth help to reduce inflammation and help you get a good night’s rest (which is paramount as far as achieving glowing skin is concerned).
Also,the collagen that’s in bone broth can help to make your skin firmer and more youthful-looking. So, if you want to proactively help out your skin, cook with bone broth more often. Within a matter of weeks, you should notice a difference.
4. Black Cumin Seed Oil Cleanser
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I ain’t got not one lie to tell you — when it comes to something that is holistically beneficial for your health, black cumin seed oil is that one. So much, in fact, that there are several articles out in cyberspace (like this onehere) that list over 100 ways that it can do wonders for your overall health and well-being. Your skin will adore this particular oil becauseit contains properties that fight acne, treat psoriasis and eczema, andhelp to dissolve warts. Also, this oil contains antibacterial and antiviral properties that help to keep your skin healthy, in general.
If you’re looking for an all-natural way to deeply cleanse your skin, black cumin seed oil can certainly be of great assistance. You can read more about why and how by goinghere.
5. Watermelon Skin Toner
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On the palate tip, few things make me happier than cubes of watermelon (when it’s in season, which is typicallybetween May and September). Since it consists of92 percent water, you know that watermelon is going to hydrate your skin — plus, the vitamin C that’s in it will do a good job of increasing your skin’s collagen production. Some other great things about watermelon (as far as your skin is concerned) is ithelps to reduce inflammation and oxidative stress and it can evenhelp to even out your skin tone.
A super refreshing way to tone and tighten your skin is to use a toner that has watermelon in it. A quick and easy recipe that will help you to do just that is locatedhere.
6. Hemp Milk Soap
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At the end of the day, hemp milk is a milk alternative that is made by mixing water and seeds from the Cannabis sativa plant (yes, the plant that makes weed) together. Since there are a lot of fatty acids in hemp milk, that automatically makes it “skin worthy” because fatty acids help to hydrate your skin, improve the texture of your skin, and reverse some of the environmental damage that your skin may be experiencing. Since there are also vitamins A, D, and E in hemp milk, that makes it beneficial for your skin as well because vitamin A can help to unclog your pores, vitamin D can help to cultivate new skin cells, and vitamin E can help to smooth out the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles.
If you’re looking for a way to soothe your entire body with hemp milk, there’s a cool (albeit ingredient-rich) recipe for how to make hemp milk soaphere.
7. Tomato Paste Mask
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It’s not that I don’t like tomatoes, it’s just that…if I go months without eating one, I don’t really notice. I wish that wasn’t the case too becausetomatoes are a good source of fiber, folate, Vitamin C, beta-carotene, and potassium.Your skin needs beta-carotene because it’s an antioxidant that helps to protect it from UV damage and it reduces the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles that you might have. Some other benefits that come withusing tomatoes for your skin are they reduce skin inflammation, boost collagen production, help to prevent cellular damage and they work well as a skin exfoliant.
So long as your skin isn’t super sensitive (because there is a fair amount of acid that’s in this particular fruit), it will be so happy that you’ve given it a face mask that has tomatoes as one of its main ingredients. StyleCraze has many for you to choose from. Gohere to check ‘em all out.
8. Fig Face Polish
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If you’ve always wondered whatthe difference is between a fig and a date, let’s get free today. Although they both are fruits, figs contain more calcium, aren’t as sweet or sticky and they also have fewer wrinkles than dates do. On the skin health tip, figs contain fiber which helps you to stay regular which can help to detox your system and prevent breakouts.Figs also contain nutrients that can help to speed up the healing process of symptoms that are associated with dermatitis and eczema.
If you’re looking for something that will deeply hydrate and moisturize your skin, figs can do that. Figs also have a pretty good reputation when it comes to removing dead skin cells so that your skin’s texture will be soft and smooth; this is partly thanks to the antioxidants that are in them.
Ready for your skin to have a brilliant glow? Check out this fig face polish recipehere.
9. Aloe Vera and Honey Facials
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There was actually a season in my life when I used todrink Aloe vera juice. Although I preferred to mix it with juice, I must admit that I could tell that it was good for me when it came tomy digestive system. I’m pretty sure that my skin enjoyed it as well, seeing that Aloe vera, internally, also helps to hydrate skin and keep it well-moisturized. If you actually use the gel on your skin,it can help to heal inflammatory acne, speed up the healing process of eczema and psoriasis symptoms and it can even assist withminimizing the appearance of pores.
As far as honey and your skin go, it’s dope because the properties in it will help to treat issues like acne, eczema, and psoriasis, it can soften the appearance of acne scars and it can even brighten your complexion over time.
If you’re someone who is all about DIY facials, this DIY Aloe & Honey Face Mask (here) will absolutely get you right.
10. Zinc Gel for Glass Skin
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A mineral that your skin definitely needs you to have in your system on a consistent basis is zinc. Studies have proven that zinc can do everything for your skin fromhelping to prevent and heal acne and providing it with protection from the sun tosoothing the symptoms that are associated with eczema and rosacea andhelping to repair DNA damage that could lead to signs of aging. Zinc-enriched foods that can help you to receive these perks internally includelamb, lentils,pecans, shiitake mushrooms, and fortified cereals.
Something else that is high in zinc — chia seeds. That said, if you like the look thatglass skin provides, you can actually make a homemade gel that can help you achieve that look. The instructions that will help you to do so are locatedhere.
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All of these are edible ways to achieve beautiful skin, whether you eat them or apply them.
Give them a shot. They’re delicious (inside) and easy (outside) ways to achieve your skin goals without any of the sometimes expensive, chemical-filled drama that comes with a lot of these commercial brands out here. And that’s just the truth.
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