I remember when I first got engaged thirteen years ago. There were exes and guys coming out of the woodwork, professing their so-called love or appreciation for me, and trying to "apologize" for how they treated me in the past. However, I wasn't the least bit concerned because I was focused on my future with my actual fiance, now husband, and I knew we were meant to be together. Nevertheless, it was a testament to the reality that sometimes and unfortunately: people only see the potential for what could've been when they see you doing well by yourself or with someone else.
Will Packer's new hit show, Put A Ring On It, on the OWN Network (airing Fridays at 10pm EST) seems to share similar sentiments - for both the women and the men. The basic premise of the show is to help couples determine if they're with the love of their life and if marriage is the next step with the help of Dr. Nicole LaBeach...and by going on dates with other people. Each couple engages in work to help them unpack their baggage and issues. As you can imagine, it really interesting witnessing their reactions, or lack thereof, when their partners start dating other people.
While these couples are still debating about taking the next step towards marriage, we wanted to talk to some real-life married men, and even a few who are engaged, and find out specifically what convinced them it was time to pop the question.*
Toby & Rynetta: Married for 17 years, Dated for two and half years
Courtesy of Toby and Rynetta
How He Proposed: Toby surprised Rynetta on her birthday by acting like he was bringing her breakfast that morning.
Why He Proposed: "After dating for two and a half years, I realized that Rynetta was different. She pushed me in ways that others didn't and I was all the better for it. I knew that it was time to take the next step. Rynetta had all the qualities that I was looking for in a wife. I knew at that point she was the woman that I was committed to spending the rest of my life with."
Patrick & Angela: Married 9 years, Dated for about two and half years
Courtesy of Patrick and Angela
How He Proposed: Patrick called on Angela's sister and some of his friends who helped him arrange what she thought was a "girls' dinner". Nevertheless, it turned out to be a surprise proposal when he walked into the restaurant with Jamie Foxx's "When I First Saw You" playing over the restaurant's sound system.
Why He Proposed: "A year before I met Angela, I was immature! I ended up going through a tough situation and at the conclusion of that situation, I asked God to make me spiritually and emotionally ready for the next woman. Over the course of a year, I had a true transformation and became a better man. One weekend, I came home to my parent's house for a party. My sister was home as well with a friend from college. I walked upstairs to see my sister and noticed her friend, but only from behind. Once I saw the back of her head, God told me that's your wife. Once I moved my sister out of the way (because she was blocking the door), I went over and introduced myself. Then, I went back downstairs and told my best friend, 'I just met my wife.'
"I was ready to propose from the moment I saw her, but I needed to prepare myself financially to provide the proposal, ring, and future home she deserved. When everything was set in place, I started taking her to jewelers to look at rings, unbeknownst to her that I had already customized a ring for her (with the help of my sister)."
Jacob & Saneda: Married 6 years, Dated for 4 years
Courtesy of Jacob and Saneda
How He Proposed: While on their first trip to Canada, Jacob proposed to Saneda as they enjoyed an intimate dinner at the CN Tower's 360-degree restaurant. As she was reaching into her purse, he reached for the iced-out jewelry box from his pocket.
Why He Proposed: "I never really had one particular moment of clarity when it came to popping the question. Rather it was a culmination of things and it was like all the stars aligned. Not often does one find someone who matches their wit and intelligence, shares similar morals, and enhances your overall life experience. Yet all those things were true. Together, we were living our best life. She would sometimes mention random engagement announcements and things of the sort, so I knew that she was ready, or at least she was making sure I knew that it was something she looked forward to.
"As referenced in a freestyle on some of my earlier work, we moved in 'after only two months, fell in love after only two pumps (she had very nice shoes)'. Since we were already committed to each other and sharing our home, it seemed like the next natural step. No need in putting off the inevitable. I embraced it, and it was one of the best decisions."
"I never really had one particular moment of clarity when it came to popping the question. Rather it was a culmination of things and it was like all the stars aligned. Not often does one find someone who matches their wit and intelligence, shares similar morals, and enhances your overall life experience. Yet all those things were true. Together, we were living our best life."
Harmakhu (“Khu”) & Jackie: Married 7 and a half years
Courtesy of Khu and Jackie
How He Proposed: Khu convinced Jackie to join her in their living room to watch a movie, but she was surprised to walk in and see that some of her family was there waiting to greet her. Khu got down on one knee and proposed to her in front of their family and friends.
Why He Proposed: "Timing is everything and even though we met in high school and had crushes on each other, we didn't date until after reuniting at our 10-year high school reunion. Since we had a good history and understanding of one another, Jackie and I moved in together after only a few months of dating. Upon moving in together, Jackie made it crystal-clear that she was not trying to shack up and would expect marriage plans within a couple of years. I loved the boundary-setting as it was a goal that I could mutually see for myself with her.
"I proposed within a year after moving in together. I knew it was time because her love brought me to a place of peace that I had never known within my life. During the first six months of dating, I received two promotions, so home and work life definitely took on a new meaning with our partnership. Having already experienced combined finances, planning, and working through the kinds of quirks or kinks that present itself when you cohabitate the same space was everything. It felt natural and it flowed, and marriage was the cherry on top to what we were building together."
Okino & Brianna: Married for 3 years
Courtesy of Okino and Brianna
How He Proposed: Okino lit some candles in their apartment in Florida, got down on one knee, and popped the question to Brianna.
Why He Proposed: "My wife, Brianna, is my soulmate, best friend, and I knew I wanted to be with her forever. We used to sit and talk for hours. We are different in many ways and similar in other ways, but the way she helps me be vulnerable and handles it with care speaks volumes. She is loving, caring, and kind. I knew I had to make it official because I could not let this love bug pass me by. It's one of life's greatest gifts to share and experience love, and when you do, you hold on to it. So, that's what I did."
Anthony & Radiance: Married almost 3 years, Dated two months before they got engaged
Courtesy of Anthony and Radiance
How He Proposed: Anthony surprised Radiance during Thanksgiving in her hometown of Cleveland, OH at her aunt's house with Anthony Hamilton's "Amen" playing in the background. He arranged it so that when it came time to bless the food, Radiance's mom asked him to do it so that he could use the opportunity to propose to her.
Why He Proposed: "We used to volunteer together, and then one Sunday, Radiance walked in and God told me she was my wife. After praying for His guidance, He revealed who had been in front of me for three years. I was ready to be the man and husband God wanted me to be. God confirmed it in different ways, so I was ready to pop the question."
"One Sunday, Radiance walked in and God told me she was my wife. After praying for His guidance, He revealed who had been in front of me for three years. I was ready to be the man and husband God wanted me to be."
Frederick & Jasmine: Married 3 years, Dated for 4 years
Courtesy of Frederick and Jasmine
Photographer Credit: Keighla Fox
How He Proposed: Since Frederick and Jasmine have big personalities, it was only fitting that the proposal was just as grand. Frederick proposed to Jasmine after jumping 14,000-feet out of the air skydiving.
Why He Proposed: "Jasmine is my best friend. I wanted to be committed and spend the rest of my life with her. I loved her spirit, her personality, her tenacity, and her work ethic. I knew that not only would she make an amazing wife, but a good mother, daughter-in-law and life partner. She has all of the qualities of an angel. I'm blessed every day to do life with her."
Thaddeus & Lauren: Married for two years, Dated for 7 years
Courtesy of Thaddeus and Lauren
How He Proposed: Initially, Thaddeus planned to propose to Lauren before they boarded a plane headed on vacation. However, since the ring was "burning a hole" in his pocket and he couldn't wait, he was on one knee asking her to marry him as soon as they arrived at the airport.
Why He Proposed: "I knew I was ready to pop the question when I realized I was the happiest when she was around, and when she wasn't around, I wanted her around. To understand how that meant a lot to me, you'd have to understand me. I really appreciate my alone time. So, the fact that I desired to have someone in my space and didn't want them to leave is when I knew I was ready. I didn't have a desire for anything else that didn't include her as a part of if.
"When I would think about future plans, I always considered her and how this would affect us, not just me. When I realized, I was making decisions based on what was best for us, I knew it was time for me to make us a forever thing. Lauren is literally my best friend. I truly feel like we are one because of how we have always poured into each other. "
"When I would think about future plans, I always considered her and how this would affect us, not just me. When I realized, I was making decisions based on what was best for us, I knew it was time for me to make us a forever thing. Lauren is literally my best friend. I truly feel like we are one because of how we have always poured into each other. "
Lance & Alison: Married for 10 months, Dated for a little over a year
Courtesy of Lance and Alison
How He Proposed: While visiting Alison's hometown in Cleveland, Ohio and after dinner with family and friends, Lance proposed to Alison before walking back into their Airbnb.
Why He Proposed: "We faced a couple of issues while dating and we were able to resolve them with communication and honesty. We both accepted each other's flaws, goofy selves, and worked on making each other better. Spending time together was not stressful, in fact, it was easy. I know marriage and love is work, but we do the work together to improve our love. We made plans together to travel, and even going to common places like the grocery store is fun and exciting. We have seen each other at our worst and love each other anyway. I felt and still feel a strong connection whenever she is in the room, and I couldn't live life without her in it."
Glenn & Kiamesha: Married 4 months, Dated for 4 years
Courtesy of Glenn and Kiamesha
Photo Credit: Peridot Imagery
How He Proposed: While visiting Marrakesh, Morocco, Glenn proposed to Kiamesha inside a courtyard while playing "Blessed" by Daniel Caesar. In college, they studied how Moroccans used the courtyard typology to fend off French colonists, so it was only fitting to propose there.
Why He Proposed: "The proposal is always performative and romantic, but imagine deciding a lifetime commitment without communication. Marriage was always discussed and planned so it was never an individual decision. Legacy was the driver for my decision...reclaiming history through marriage and re-imagining our future through children."
Colby Boone & Kheiston: Married 3 months, Dated for 8 months
Courtesy of Colby and Kheiston
Photo Credit: James Willis Photography @james_willis_photography
How He Proposed: Inspired by Pinterest, Colby created an intimate and romantic atmosphere with rose petals, balloons, music, and a scripture written on a whiteboard, and asked for Kheiston's hand in marriage right there in their apartment.
Why He Proposed: "I had the ring for almost a month, and with the pandemic and social injustice, the idea of waiting to be with someone knowing that tomorrow isn't promised didn't seem right. I believe one of the greatest decisions I made was not waiting. Instead, I took a leap and we're pressing toward the goals that we have for ourselves and for what we believe we were put together in this world to do. It was a huge step for me that took effort and creativity especially since all my friends are single. But I'm so glad to start this journey with my best friend, now wife."
Kenneth & Kamirah: Married for two months, Dated for 10 years
Courtesy of Kenneth and Kamirah
How He Proposed: Kenneth proposed to Kamirah at her first annual women's empowerment event in Atlantic City in front of her family and friends.
Why He Proposed: "I honestly always knew that I wanted to get married and start my own family because I was raised by my parents who have been married all my life. I knew even before I saw Kamirah in person that I wanted her in my life. I got to see Kamirah initially through Myspace. It wasn't until my senior year in high school that I got to see Kamirah in person.
After years of dating, I knew that I didn't want to waste any more time. So, I decided to make us official. She has always loved me, respected me and made me feel better than any woman I had previously been with. She has a great sense of humor, she's gorgeous, smart, and VERY ambitious. She doesn't let anything hold her back. I knew I was ready to pop the question because she made me feel secure and complete. She has always loved me unconditionally and pushed me to be the best me I can be! I knew I couldn't and didn't want to live without her so it was my choice to make her Mrs. Brown."
Mike & Courtney: Engaged - Proposed in 2020, Dated for almost a year
Courtesy of Mike and Courtney
How He Proposed: Mike surprised his fiancee by telling her they were shooting a birthday video for his sister. After decorating a loft, hiring a live guitarist, and arranging it so that family and friends could witness it all through livestream, she arrived totally shocked to see him down on one knee proposing to her.
Courtesy of Mike and Courtney
Why He Proposed: "As cliche as it sounds, I knew Courtney was the one from the moment we started talking. My sister lost her first child to preterm labor a year or so prior and I had been praying for another niece or nephew. At the same time, I asked God to send me my wife. We exchanged numbers on Instagram and even though I hated talking on the phone, we spent 10 hours on FaceTime the first time we spoke. Those 10 hours felt like five minutes and by the end we knew everything about each other and how much we had in common.
"The icing on the cake is that I learned my fiancee was a midwife. God answered both my prayers because my sister got pregnant with my now seven-month-old nephew who was cared for during labor by my now-fiancee. This year has brought a lot of loss and many people are missing their loved ones from the dinner table. So, for me, it was a wake-up call that tomorrow isn't promised and I need to let this woman know I want her to be my wife. Hence, I popped the question."
"This year has brought a lot of loss and many people are missing their loved ones from the dinner table. So, for me, it was a wake-up call that tomorrow isn't promised and I need to let this woman know I want her to be my wife. Hence, I popped the question."
Jordan & Jazmyne: Engaged - Proposed in 2020, Dated for almost 3 years
Courtesy of Jordan and Jazmyne
How He Proposed: Jordan arranged for a surprise proposal at their church as well as an engagement photo shoot immediately following the proposal.
Why He Proposed: "I knew Jazmyne was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. We have talked every single day since the very first day we met. I honestly couldn't imagine going a day without talking to her. It's like we are perfect for each other. We complement each other so well and I truly see her as my companion. She helps me to be a better man. She has done so much for me and no one has ever treated me the way she treats me. That's how I knew I was ready. I have so much to be thankful for from her, so putting a ring on it was really the least I could do. I love that girl so much. Not a day goes by where she isn't the first person I think of when I wake up and the last when I fall asleep. I tell her all the time that she deserves everything and I mean that. I'm so blessed to have her in my life and I can't wait to marry her."
*Some phrases may have been slightly modified or paraphrased for the sake of clarity.
Featured image courtesy of Jordan & Jazmyne
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It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Alistair Berg/Getty ImagesStep 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Getty ImagesStep 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
DMP/ Getty ImagesStep 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
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Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert