Pretty much any headline that I give for these articles, I am intentional about. Okay, but this one right here? When I say that blind pimples really and truly are the absolute worst? UGH. They are painful. They are irritating. And sometimes, it seems like it takes them for-e-ver to go away. That’s because they’re the kind of pimples that form so beneath the surface of your skin that they may never reach the top and turn into a head. That’s why you have to come up with approaches that are a bit more strategic in order to help them go away.
As far as taking preventative measures go, make sure to exfoliate your skin (to keep your pores and hair follicles from clogging up), wash your face each and every time you wear make-up, and keep your stress levels down (stress can kick up the production of sebum and that can lead to all sorts of breakouts).
Okay, but what do you do if you’ve already got a blind pimple that’s present and accounted for, and it’s about to drive you absolutely nuts? If that’s what you’ve got going on right now, I’ve been there. More than once (SDMH). Here are 12 things that I know, for a fact, can bring you some much-needed relief to your visible and internal blind pimple.
1. Tea Tree Oil Is a Beast
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When it comes to tea tree oil specifically, there are two reasons why I will gladly stand on any street and sing its praises. 1) it’s how good it is at removing dandruff (just pour a few drops into your shampoo, chile), and 2) it’s how quickly it can remove a pimple, including a blind pimple. When it comes to my latter shout-out, I get why, too. Due to tea tree oil’s extremely potent antiseptic and anti-inflammatory properties, if you’re looking for something all-natural that will cleanse out your pores and remove acne-causing bacteria without drying out your skin at almost a record rate, tea tree oil is going to make that happen.
And since it can also help to heal wounds, get rid of nail fungus, and fight tooth decay — I don’t see why everyone doesn’t have at least one bottle of 100 percent pure tea tree oil somewhere in their house.
2. Raw Honey Is Your Friend
The fact that (when stored right) honey doesn’t expire is enough of a reason to give it all of the props in the world. Oh, but if you add to that the fact that it contains anti-inflammatory, antioxidant, and antibacterial properties that strengthen gut health, boost immunity, soothe a sore throat, reduce coughing, improve your quality of sleep, and even hydrate your skin and hair — yes, raw honey is something else that is an absolute must-have, across the board.
The reason why it makes the “blind pimple list” is because it’s something else that can swiftly and effectively kill the bacteria that causes blind pimples to form in the first place. So, if you’ve got one popping up, spot-treat it with a bit of honey. If you apply it before turning in at night, you could notice a difference in how your blind pimple feels by morning.
3. Apply Some Ice
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There’s a very simple reason why applying ice can be a wise move if you’re trying to reduce the discomfort that comes from having a blind pimple. Since coldness can constrict your blood vessels, if you were to apply ice to your underneath-the-surface zit, it can reduce the swelling, which can help it to appear less visible (if you can see the blind pimple but it hasn’t yet come to a head) and feel a lot less painful as well.
4. Then Apply a Warm Compress
Speaking of temperature therapy, something else that you might want to try is applying a warm compress directly onto your blind pimple. The thought process here is that while coldness can reduce inflammation, warmth can help to drain the pus in the pore — and that could either cause the pimple to go away or rise to the surface at a quicker pace (especially if you apply one temperature after the other).
5. Try Some Salicylic Acid
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Ever since I’ve been doing chemical peels at home (check out “I've Been Doing At-Home Chemical Peels. Here Are The Pros And Cons.”), my skin has improved greatly when it comes to its texture and the amount of period pimples that I receive (which is next to nothing at this point). I’d venture to say that a part of the reason is because some of my products contain salicylic acid, which is an ingredient that helps to exfoliate your skin by sloughing off dead skin cells. The reason why this can work well for blind pimples is, that the clearer the clogged pore of that kind of pimple is, the easier it will be for the zit to come to a head and drain itself.
Oh, and if you’re wondering if pimple patches containing salicylic acid are the ultimate blind pimple hack, I’ll be honest with you: products need to make money, so many will try to sell you on that. However, my personal experience has been that pimple patches are best at draining fluid from pimples that are actually at the surface; they do little, if anything, for blind pimples overall. #sorry
6. Don’t Forget About Benzoyl Peroxide
Out of all of the hacks listed in this article, the one that you may be the most familiar with is benzoyl peroxide. That’s because, when it comes to popular skincare brands that claim to get rid of pimples, in general, this is an ingredient that is in many of them. And with good reason. Benzoyl peroxide is a powerful antiseptic that cleanses bacteria from pimples, including blind pimples. Just make sure that if this is what you decide to use, you take the “less is more” approach. It’s not uncommon for people to overdo it when it comes to applying this product, and that can lead to redness, skin peeling, itchiness, and your skin becoming worse instead of better. Indeed, with benzoyl peroxide, a little bit goes a really long way.
7. Use a Blend of Grapeseed Oil and Jojoba Oil
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Although, on the surface, it might sound odd that putting oil on a pimple can help it to go away, there is a reason why that is absolutely the case. See, the focus isn’t so much the oil but the ingredients that are in it. For instance, coconut oil is high in lauric acid, and, not only does that help to kill the bacteria that cause acne, but it can also reduce any scarring that may be left behind once the acne lesions start to heal. Two other oils that are awesome as a combo are grapeseed and jojoba oil. Grapeseed is dope because it contains vitamin E (which is loaded with antioxidants) along with strong antimicrobial properties that can help to heal pimples (including blind pimples), while jojoba is awesome because it contains anti-inflammatory and antimicrobial agents that can reduce the appearance of blind pimples — especially if you apply a mixture of them directly onto your blind pimples every night.
8. Invest in a LED Device
If blind pimples and acne overall are something that you deal with on a fairly consistent basis, you might want to look into investing in an at-home red light therapy device. These are beneficial because light therapy helps not only kill bacteria but stimulate collagen production, too. These types of devices are gaining traction for removing the swelling of blind pimples quickly and effectively, so it couldn’t hurt to invest in one to see how it works for you personally.
9. Up the Omega-3 Foods
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If you want to boost your brain health, strengthen your heart, reduce your chances of getting breast cancer, improve your vision, and even help to prevent and/or bring relief to certain autoimmune diseases, get more omega-3 fatty acids into your system. Since these acids are pretty good at also reducing inflammation, that’s why they can be helpful at speeding up the healing process of a blind pimple. Foods that can help you out in this department include walnuts, tuna, eggs, fortified orange juice, and flaxseed oil.
10. Reduce Your Dairy Intake
I still think it’s wild that humans are pretty much the only mammals who consume another mammal’s baby milk — and for me, that has become enough of a reason to be cool with staying in my oat milk alternative lane (for the most part); not to mention the fact that it’s made me feel better overall (you can read more about health risks that are associated with consuming dairy here, here and here).
And when it comes to your pimples and mine, even the American Academy of Dermatology Association had to go on record as saying that cow’s milk has been linked to breakouts, while other studies state that dairy overall can aggravate acne in people ages 30 and under due to the hormones that are typically in dairy products like milk and cheese.
So, if blind pimples seem to pop up out of nowhere whenever you and pizza or ice cream are bonding together — while I hate to rain on your parade, that’s probably not some random coincidence. #sorryagain
11. Drink Some Spearmint Tea
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Articles I’ve written for the platform like “10 Teas That Are Great For The Fall Season — As Far As Hair Growth Is Concerned,” “10 'Uncommon' Teas You Should Add To Your Stash (& Why)” and “So, Here Are Some Teas That Will Make Your Sex Life So Much Better” prove that I’m a big time tea fan. In fact, when I finish penning this article, I’m gonna treat myself to some black tea and honey…and I can’t wait. Before closing this out, though, if you also like tea, make sure that you’ve got some spearmint in your tea collection.
Not only is it great when it comes to fighting bacterial infections and reducing stress, but it might also trip you out to know that it can help to balance out your hormones and — get this — even move unwanted facial hair. And why is it great for treating blind pimples? Well, the properties in it help to kill bacteria-causing acne and reduce the inflammation of zits. Yeah, definitely one of the best teas you can have in your possession is spearmint, for sure.
12. Leave the "White Stuff" Alone
Even though white foods like pasta, rice, and bread may taste really good, the reality is they don’t have many nutrients in them. Plus, they are simple carbohydrates that turn into sugar — and sugar is definitely a culprit for pimples. The main reason is because sugar can cause inflammation, and inflammation can increase sebum production. So, if you must do the white stuff, consume it in moderation. Your health will thank you. Your complexion, including when it comes to treating and preventing blind pimples, will too!
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
For Us, By Us: How HBCU Alumni Are Building Legacies Through Entrepreneurship
Homecoming season is here, and alumni are returning to the yard to celebrate with their friends and family at the historically Black colleges and universities (HBCUs) that have changed their lives forever.
No matter where their life journeys have taken them, for HBCU students from near and far, returning to where it all started can invoke feelings of nostalgia, appreciation for the past, and inspiration for the future.
The seeds for these entrepreneurs were planted during their time as students at schools like Spelman, North Carolina A&T, and more, which is why xoNecole caught up with Look Good Live Well’s Ariane Turner, HBCU Buzz’s Luke Lawal and Morehouse Senior Director of Marketing and Comms and Press Secretary Jasmine Gurley to highlight the role their HBCU roots play in their work as entrepreneurs, the legacy they aim to leave behind through the work that they do, and more as a part of Hyundai’s Best In Class initiative.
On Honoring HBCU Roots To Create Something That Is For Us, By Us
Ariane Turner
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When Ariane Turner launched Look Good, Live Well, she created it with Black and brown people in mind, especially those with sensitive skin more prone to dryness and skin conditions like acne and eczema.
The Florida A&M University graduate launched her business to create something that addressed topical skin care needs and was intentional about its approach without negative terminology.
Turner shared that it is important to steer clear of language often adopted by more prominent brands, such as “banishing breakouts” or “correcting the skin,” because, in reality, Turner says there is nothing wrong with the way that our skin and bodies react to various life changes.
“I think what I have taken with me regarding my HBCU experience and translated to my entrepreneurial experience is the importance of not just networking,” Turner, the founder and CEO of Look Good, Live Well, tellls xoNecole.
“We hear that in business all the time, your network is your net worth, but family, there’s a thing at FAMU that we call FAMU-lee instead of family, and it’s very much a thing. What that taught me is the importance of not just making relationships and not just making that connection, but truly working on deepening them, and so being intentional about connecting with people initially, but staying connected and building and deepening those relationships, and that has served me tremendously in business, whether it’s being able to reach back to other classmates who I went to school with, or just networking in general.”
She adds, “I don’t come from a business background. As soon as I finished school, I continued with my entrepreneurial journey, and so there’s a lot of that traditional business act and the networking, those soft skills that I just don’t have, but I will say that just understanding how to leverage and network community and to build intentional relationships is something that has taken me far and I definitely got those roots while attending FAMU.”
On Solving A Very Specific Need For The Community
Luke Lawal Jr.
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When Luke Lawal Jr. launched HBCU Buzz, his main focus was to represent his community, using the platform to lift as they climbed by creating an outlet dedicated to celebrating the achievements and positive news affecting the 107 historically HBCUs nationwide.
By spotlighting the wonderful things that come from the HBCU community and coupling it with what he learned during his time at Bowie State University, Lawal used that knowledge to propel himself as an entrepreneur while also providing his people with accurate representation across the internet.
“The specific problem in 2011 when I started HBCU Buzz was more so around the fact that mainstream media always depict HBCUs as negative,” Lawal says. “You would only see HBCUs in the mainstream media when someone died, or the university president or someone was stepping down. It was always bad news, but they never shed light on all the wonderful things from our community."
So, I started HBCU Buzz to ensure the world saw the good things that come from our space. And they knew that HBCUs grew some of the brightest people in the world, and just trying to figure out ways to make sure our platform was a pedestal for all the students that come through our institutions.”
“The biggest goal is to continue to solve problems, continue to create brands that solve the problems of our communities, and make sure that our products, our brands, our companies, and institutions are of value and they’re helping our community,” he continues. “That they’re solving problems that propel our space forward.”
On How Being An HBCU Alum Impacts The Way One Shows Up In The World
Jasmine Gurley
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Jasmine Gurley is a proud North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University alum. She is even more delighted with her current role, which enables her to give back to current HBCU students as the Senior Director of Brand Marketing and Communications and official press secretary at Morehouse College.
“It was a formative experience where I really was able to come into my own and say yes to all the opportunities that were presented to me, and because of that, it’s been able to open the doors later in life too,” says Gurley of her experience at North Carolina A&T. “One thing I love about many HBCUs is that we are required to learn way more about African American history than you do in your typical K through 12 or even at the higher ed level."
She adds, “It allowed us to have a better understanding of where we came from, and so for me, because I’m a storyteller, I’m a history person, I’m very sensitive to life in general, being able to listen to the stories and the trials that our ancestors overcame, put the battery pack in my back to say, ‘Oh nothing can stop me. Absolutely nothing can stop me. I know where I came from, so I can overcome something and try anything. And I have an obligation to be my ancestors’ wildest dreams. Simultaneously, I also have a responsibility to help others realize that greatness.
Gurley does not take her position at an HBCU, now as a leader, lightly.
“People think I’m joking when I say I’m living the dream, but I really am,” she notes. “So I wake up every day and know that the work that I do matters, no matter how hard it might be, how frustrating it may be, and challenging it. I know the ripple effect of my work, my team, and what this institution does also matter. The trajectory of Black male experiences, community, history, and then just American advancement just in general.”
On the other hand, through her business, Sankofa Public Relations, Gurley is also on a mission to uplift brands in their quest to help their respective communities. Since its inception in 2017, Sankofa PR has been on a mission to “reach back and reclaim local, national, and global communities by helping those actively working to move” various areas of the world, focusing on pushing things forward for the better.
“Through Sankofa, we’ve worked with all different types of organizational brands and individuals in several different industries, but I would think of them as mission-based,” says Gurley.
“So with that, it’s an opportunity to help people who are trying to do good in the world, and they are passionate about what they’re doing. They just need help with marketing issues, storytelling, and branding, and that’s when my expertise can come into play. Help them get to that moment where they can tell their story through me or another platform, and that’s been super fulfilling.”
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
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Flirting With Women 101: A Queer, Bi, & Bi-Curious Guide To Making The First Move
The first time another woman flirted with me, I missed all of the queues. She was batting her eyelashes, complimenting my fragrance, and leaning in close. I thought she just wanted to make sure I heard her over the loud music of the club we were at. Looking back now, with more time and experience, I realize she was full-on flirting with me.
Flirting can be a fun and exciting way to show interest in someone, but when it comes to flirting with other women, many of us find ourselves feeling uncertain. Is it like flirting with men? Yes—and no. While the fundamentals of flirting remain the same, nuances specific to queer relationships often add layers of complexity. If you're a bisexual, bi-curious, or queer woman looking to flirt with other women but feel unsure about where to start, this guide is for you.
Understanding the Flirting Dynamic
First, let’s acknowledge the struggle. For many women, flirting with another woman can feel awkward or even intimidating. There’s often an underlying societal pressure to “prove” one’s queerness, which can manifest as anxiety around making sure you’re coming across as genuinely interested—especially when navigating the tricky territory of interpreting another woman’s signals. Is she queer? Is she even attracted to women? This uncertainty can create an extra layer of tension.
As Irma Garcia, a certified sex educator, explains, “One common challenge queer women face when flirting with other women is that their advances are often mistaken for friendliness. This can create confusion, especially in femme-to-femme dynamics, where traditional markers of flirting overlap with how femmes generally interact—warm, playful, and supportive.” It can be hard to convey flirtation between women, but confidence begins with this mindset shift.
The key to overcoming awkward feelings or misunderstandings is stepping boldly into your identity. Be prepared for some pushback or rejection. But remember, you’re attracted to women, and that attraction is valid.
Flirting 101: Confidence Starts with Eye Contact
So let's talk practical advice, shall we? The most subtle, yet impactful, form of flirting starts with eye contact. When flirting with other women, eye contact is your first tool in breaking the ice. It’s a silent, non-verbal way of showing interest, and it can communicate attraction without saying a word.
“Maintaining eye contact signals engagement,” Irma advises. “But the trick is finding that sweet spot where it’s not too intense. Eye contact combined with a smile invites the other person into your world in a flirty, approachable way.”
Eye contact and a genuine smile act as a non-verbal invitation, showing the other woman that you’re open and interested.
Here’s how to do it: Hold her gaze for a few seconds longer than usual and smile in a way that feels comfortable. Look at her lips, cheeks, and chin, and then back up at her eyes. Remember to listen. (It will show on your face if your mind isn’t on what she is saying.) Stay present and remember not every glance needs to be intense; subtlety can go a long way in creating a flirtatious atmosphere.
Compliments Are Your Best Friend
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Once eye contact has been established, the next step is leveling up the flirtation with a well-placed compliment. Specific, thoughtful compliments can make someone feel seen and appreciated. Instead of going for something generic like “You look nice,” try focusing on a unique aspect of her style or personality. Complimenting her laugh, her fashion sense, or even her energy can show her that you’re paying attention.
“Compliments are beautiful gifts,” says Irma. “Complimenting someone’s personality or the essence of who they are as a person feels more meaningful than surface-level flattery. It’s about being an active listener and making sure your compliments reflect the person’s true self.”
Be sincere. A specific compliment feels personal, and it’s more likely to stand out.
Avoid comments that feel rehearsed or overly familiar, and focus on what genuinely stands out to you about the person. A well-thought-out and genuine compliment will pay off big time!
Building Connection Through Touch
Introducing physical touch into the flirting equation can deepen the connection, but it needs to be done with care and sensitivity. Touch is a powerful tool for creating intimacy, but knowing when and how to incorporate it is key.
“Consent is just as crucial in queer dynamics as in any other,” says Irma. “If you’re ever uncertain, simply ask! Phrases like, ‘Is it okay if I hug you?’ or ‘Can I hold your hand?’ show respect for boundaries without breaking the flirtatious energy.”
Start small. A light touch on the arm during conversation or a gentle brush of hands can signal interest while giving the other person space to reciprocate or pull back. Pay close attention to her body language—if she leans in, she’s likely interested in escalating the interaction. If she pulls away, it’s important to respect that and shift gears.
Putting It All Together
Now that we’ve covered the basic building blocks—eye contact, compliments, and touch—let’s look at how they flow together in real-life scenarios. Picture this: You’re at a house party, sitting close to a woman you find attractive. As she talks, you maintain eye contact and listen intently. She cracks a joke, and you compliment her sense of humor. If she responds positively, you can initiate a light, casual touch on her hand or arm to test the waters.
Maybe she leans closer as you continue chatting. You continue to maintain eye contact and place your hand on her shoulder, leaving it a bit longer. She responds positively, smiling and placing her hand on your knee. You keep following, eye contact, compliment, and light touch. Boom, you’re flirting!
This step-by-step process helps build a natural rhythm in flirting, making it easier to navigate from the first glance to more intimate exchanges.
As Irma points out, “Confidence comes from being present in the moment and enjoying the interaction rather than worrying about the outcome.”
Developing Your Own Flirting Style
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While this guide offers a road map, it’s important to develop your own style of flirting. Authenticity is always the most attractive quality. Experiment with these techniques, but don’t feel confined to them. Maybe your style is more playful, or perhaps you prefer deep, meaningful conversations. Whatever feels most comfortable for you is what’s going to resonate best with others.
Irma emphasizes the importance of being true to yourself: “Trying to adopt a different persona can lead to confusion and misunderstandings. Authenticity is key! Pay attention to your body language, lean in, maintain eye contact, and let the energy flow naturally.”
Overcoming Misconceptions About Same Gender Flirting
Finally, it’s crucial to address the misconceptions and bi-phobia that bisexual, bi-curious, and queer women may encounter while flirting with other women.
As Irma highlights, “There’s sometimes an assumption that bisexual women are ‘just experimenting’ or ‘not serious,’ which can lead to unfair judgments.” The best way to navigate these misconceptions is through open communication. Be clear about your intentions and assert your desires with confidence.
By surrounding yourself with affirming spaces and individuals who validate your queerness, you can minimize the impact of biphobia and focus on connecting with women who appreciate and reciprocate your energy.
Empowering You to Explore Your Bisexuality
Flirting with women doesn’t need to be daunting. With the right mindset, it can be an empowering experience. By starting with small, confident gestures—eye contact, compliments, and gentle touch—you can build meaningful connections with other women while exploring your bisexuality in a fun and fulfilling way. Remember, flirting is supposed to be playful and sexy. So, take the pressure off yourself, be authentic, and enjoy the journey.
As Irma Garcia puts it: “Confidence is a state of mind, baby! You have to flip that internal switch and own the fact that you’re that girl.” So go out there and flirt like you mean it.
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