Being an introvert can definitely create lonely moments. Yes, we like to be alone a lot of times. In fact, that's often when we recharge and get back the energy we need to interact with others. Still, it can be a little scary to look around and realize no one else is there.
Instead of making the loneliness run even deeper by just sprawling out on the couch, we can be intentional about creating moments to help prevent it, to begin with. Bottom line, introverts get lonely too, and this is how we can fight it:
Be In The Moment When You’re Around Others
As introverts, most of us love to be in a room full of people, we just don't care to talk or interact all the time. We might look like we're bored and scrolling through social media wishing we were anywhere else but there. Yet in reality, we could be having a blast. It's all good and great until we end up in a room by ourselves and still feel like something is missing. Something that can help fight loneliness is to be in the moment when those people are around.
Even though we're introverted, we still thrive off of relationships and interaction just like everyone else. Something that has worked for me is to find someone to connect with one-on-one if you're uncomfortable addressing the whole group at a time. That will help you break the ice and slowly feel more at ease with interacting. You don't necessarily have to lead the group, but you can at least be a part of it. Then when you're by yourself, you'll more likely feel relief and peace rather than loneliness and wanting more.
Take A Break From Social Media
Because we might not express things verbally, we tend to let them simmer and fester on the inside, and scrolling on social media doesn't really help that. Looking at friends, family and even stranger's highlight reels can make us, or really anyone for that matter, focus inward and start to think that they aren't living their best life to the fullest. Coming across a snapshot of a group of people hanging out together might make you feel lonely and left out, but in reality, you might not have even desired to be there because you were perfectly fine having a quiet night at home.
Still, seeing other people do it has the power to make you feel like you're doing something wrong and you need to get out there to make friends so you can post those same kinds of photos. While it might be 100 percent true that you need to get out of your comfort zone, using social media as a foundation can be more detrimental than helpful.
Don’t Cancel Plans
I used to be really bad at this one. It happens when you're in this weird space between loneliness but not really feeling like being around anyone. Yes, that can exist. I remember being invited to someone's birthday party and as much as the idea of going sounded great, I didn't feel like it! I wanted to just stay home and chill. But because I was in high spirits when I accepted the invitation, I felt like I couldn't' cancel. And I didn't want to revert to the habit of not going places I was invited.
I ended up going and had so much fun. In the end, most of the time we're always glad we didn't cancel and decided to go through with any plans. Ultimately, that's what helps us fight those temptations to cancel. When we're lonely, it's ironically so easy to want to just be around ourselves yet want to be around others for security. We have to be careful not to let loneliness be the reason we flake out on friends who might be depending on us, or the opportunity to meet and establish new friendships.
Do Something Kind
It's crazy how being nice to someone else can get us out of our own little lonely funk. While we might be waiting for someone else to give us a pick-me-up by expressing kindness to us, it can be just as fulfilling (if not more) when we extend that kindness to someone else. I know it takes a lot to get out of our bubble and comfort zone to be intentional about showing kindness. It's not that we aren't kind, it's just figuring out a way to express it that can get murky.
Whether it's sending a thank-you card to someone or buying something you saw them admiring, acts of kindness can be a trick to getting out of loneliness. It's not to necessarily get something out of it, it just makes us get out of ourselves and our own heads.
Have A Goal For Getting Social
Setting a goal to have at least one social interaction with someone a day can make a major difference in kicking those lonely emotions. Doing things like meeting someone new or initiating a conversation with someone instead of being on the receiving end are just a couple of ways to having meaningful social interactions with others that can help keep us fulfilled.
These interactions don't always have to be with strangers, you can show your appreciation by interacting with those who are already in your life. If there's a friend who you don't talk to unless they call, make the move and call them first. If you're always getting invited but never doing the inviting, host a girl's night and invite your closest friends over. And while you're there, engage, be vulnerable and have fun!
Featured image by Getty Images.
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