

Self-care is to self-love as action is to verb. It is an extension and a cultivation of what self-love embodies. It's one of those things that should be second nature to people today but oftentimes takes a backseat to other life demands. It is easy to get wrapped up in the hustle and bustle of life and forget to take care of yourself. Maintaining mindfulness and prioritizing self-care counteracts the negatives that deplete your mood, energy, health, and overall quality of life.
Self-care is vital.
When I think about self-love and the actions of self-care, the standard manicure/pedicure or going to the spa comes to mind, but I wondered if there were other go-to treat yo' self practices that creative women on-the-go used in their self-care practices.
I know for me, being on a budget does not allow much room to splurge on salon visits or massages too often (or not at all) so self-care practices had to take other forms. For a long time, I did not realize its importance until I became aware of how differently my experience with the world was when I took the time to be with me and there for me versus when I did not. I was so accustomed and so ready to be everyone's “yes" girl that I forgot to say “yes" to who mattered: me.
Self-care is mindfulness.
When I am mindful, I am centered and when I am centered, what goes into me and out of me flows in this wave of effortless beautiful energy. I enjoy running a luxurious warm bath, no bubbles, just clear water with music playing in the background, a glass of wine or a cup of herbal tea, and lit vanilla sandalwood candles to light the room. That's my ideal form of self-care. I am with myself, I am taking in myself, and I am enjoying myself and making myself feel good.
I spoke to ladies I admire about what all their self-care practices entail. Read below for some self-care practice inspiration.
"Self-care is keeping a close inventory of my time."
"My ideal method to practice self-care is to keep a close inventory of my time because time is one of the greatest resources we have. If I'm spending ALL of my time working without taking breaks or finding activities that replenish me, I won't be any good. So being mindful of what I'm doing and when I'm doing it helps keep me in check to make sure I'm spending time praying, writing, meditating, going to the gym, being around people who remind me of my greatness, working on what I love and anything else that restores me. Self-care consists of a really good workout, good food, amazing conversations, taking in art in whatever forms it comes, and a great night of sleep." - Melissa Kimble, Social Media Strategist & Creator of #blkcreatives
"Self-care is spoiling myself with myself."
"As someone who is constantly on the go, whether it be school, work, or personal projects, I often look forward to the nights I get to spoil myself with myself. I usually pick up my favorite bottle of chardonnay and start my night by delving into DIY's. I like to blend my own body oils while simultaneously indulging in the aromatic scents the essential oils exude while mixing. It's calming, relaxing, and gives me a moment to learn what my body and my brain respond to. I then apply the body oil to my body, taking the time to explore and appreciate the skin that I'm in. It is a liberating experience because it allows me to remain attentive to my body, while giving myself a break and simply focusing on loving what makes me, me." - Marie, Writer/Blogger
"Self-care is engaging all five of my senses in the best way possible."
"As a business owner, I have to practice self-care often or else I'll lose my mind, ha! To me, self-care means being mindful of how you're treating yourself and knowing what your needs are. We get so wrapped up in how to best serve others that we end up losing ourselves in the process. In order to center myself after a stressful day (and really, what day isn't stressful), I light yummy smelling candles, blast my trippy music of choice...or Drake, actually, it's usually Drake, and I eat my favorite foods while swaying around my room! For me, it's all about engaging all five of my senses in the best way possible, because sitting at a computer day in and day out can definitely weigh on you." - Jacque Amadi, E-commerce Entrepreneur
"Self-care is in the calmness of enjoying a good meal."
“I'm a huge advocate of the power of food: the moments after you've devoured an incredible meal are filled with such a wondrous sense of relaxation and satisfaction. For my self-care nights, I treat myself to a phenomenal meal. Sometimes I'll cook, sometimes I'll go out, but I don't worry about cost, calories, or time. Instead, I simply immerse myself in the calmness of enjoying an astonishing meal with myself. Also I always pair it with a bottle of either champagne or hard liquor, so that helps." - Zauni, Writer/Blogger
"Self-care for me is dance."
"Ideal self-care for me would be to go a dance class, workshop, or even a weekend retreat. I have neglected dance and movement for such a long time and it's a huge part of what makes me feel sensual and alive. It's easy to get caught up in adulting and let the things that feed your heart and soul fall through the cracks. Dance is an excellent creative outlet to give your mind a break and just flow." - GG Renee, writer/creativity coach
What do the self care practices that help keep you sane and centered look like? Share with me below.
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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The Power Of Your Big 3: How Your Sun, Moon & Rising Signs Shape You
Astrology has become even more mainstream and a phenomenon than it ever has in the past. We have gone beyond the, “What’s your sign?” and have moved into “What’s your big 3?” seemingly overnight, and rightly so due to the significance of knowing these important details. Your Big 3 in Astrology represents your sun sign, your moon sign, and your rising sign.
This trifecta is thought to be one of the most significant details of your birth chart and gives you and others more of a full-picture look at who you are beyond just your sun sign.
Knowing your big 3 is important, especially if you are someone who has never really resonated with your sun sign. You read about what it means to be an Aries, but it may not align with what you see or your experience with other Aries. Meanwhile, the whole time, you have a Libra rising, the complete opposite sign of Aries, and this is why you have always seen yourself as a more laid-back and less confrontational Aries.
Elements hold a key role in your birth chart and having a big 3 where the elements are all compatible or the same often signifies someone who knows who they are and is comfortable in their skin. Whereas someone with a different element for each part of their big 3 may have challenges with identity or defining who they are or how they want to present themselves. It’s a different type of perspective when looking into your big 3, and it helps you see where your strengths and needs are in life, and how to tap more into this potential.
Your Big 3 In Astrology, Explained
Your big 3 can help you navigate life by understanding which part of you comes out more in different circumstances. At home, you are most like your moon sign, when you are out and about, you are most like your rising sign. Whether you are at home or out and about, your goals, purpose, and interests are most like your sun sign.
You can find out what your big 3 is by looking up a ‘Birth Chart Calculator’ on your search engine, typing in your birthday details (you will need to know your birth date, location, and the exact time you were born), and generating your birth chart.
Read below for your sun, moon, and rising signs.
YOUR SUN SIGN
Your sun sign represents the core of you and what motivates you to shine and be your best self. This is your personality, goals, purpose, identity, ego, interests, direction, and where you light up in life.
FIRE SUN (Aries Sun, Leo Sun, Sagittarius Sun)
If you are an Aries sun, a Leo sun, or a Sagittarius sun, you are outgoing, confident, fearless, and in tune with yourself and your personal goals and desires in life. You go after the things you want, and you are not afraid to take up space. You are someone who prefers to be more independent, and you are often in more leadership roles in life.
EARTH SUN (Taurus Sun, Virgo Sun, Capricorn Sun)
If you are a Taurus sun, a Virgo sun, or a Capricorn sun, you are grounded, dependable, loyal, hard-working, and logical. You prefer the finer things in life but also work hard to get where you are. You are someone others feel they can rely on, and you are often a support for other people in your life. You are very connected to the material sides of life, and have a gift for manifesting.
AIR SUN (Gemini Sun, Libra Sun, Aquarius Sun)
If you are a Gemini sun, a Libra sun, or an Aquarius sun, you are light-hearted, free-flowing, intelligent, and communicative. You speak what is on your mind, and you love to connect and communicate with others. People know you for the things you say and your out-of-the-box ideas, and you are someone who is open-minded and provides a safe space for people to be authentically themselves.
WATER SUN (Cancer Sun, Scorpio Sun, Pisces Sun)
If you are a Cancer sun, a Scorpio sun, or a Pisces sun, you are thoughtful, generous, emotional, loving, and compassionate. You care deeply about the people you love, and you are always there for others. You may be more emotional than most, and this is due to your strong intuition and open heart. You are creative, inspiring, and motivated towards connection in life.
YOUR MOON SIGN
Your moon sign represents your emotions. This is the way you express yourself emotionally, how you process your emotions, what you need in love, what makes you feel safe and nurtured, your desires, intuition, your inner world, and what’s going on beneath the surface.
FIRE MOON (Aries Moon, Leo Moon, Sagittarius Moon)
If you are an Aries moon, a Leo moon, or a Sagittarius moon, you are someone who is not afraid to communicate your emotions or how you are feeling, and you can feel your emotions from a mile away. You are confident in yourself and are someone who stands up for what you feel is right. You have a strong need to be seen and heard in your relationships, and a certain type of understanding is needed for you to emotionally thrive. You may have some challenges with anger or high energy and are working through emotional impulses in this lifetime.
EARTH MOON (Taurus Moon, Virgo Moon, Capricorn Moon)
If you are a Taurus moon, a Virgo moon, or a Capricorn moon, you are someone who is emotionally grounded, safe, comforting, and logical. You aren’t overly emotional and may not show your emotions to people much at all, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have them. You think before you speak, and you process your emotions before acting on them, and you tend to be more down-to-earth and understanding when it comes to other people’s emotional worlds as well. You are someone people go to when they need someone to talk to you as you are a very good listener.
AIR MOON (Gemini Moon, Libra Moon, Aquarius Moon)
If you are a Gemini moon, a Libra moon, or an Aquarius moon, you are someone who is fun, outgoing, and emotionally open-minded. You don’t like heavy emotions or too much emotional drama, and you tend to be more go-with-the-flow in this area of your life. Good conversation and mutual understanding are very important to you in your relationships and you want funny banter and inspiration in your connections with others.
WATER MOON (Cancer Moon, Scorpio Moon, Pisces Moon)
If you are a Cancer moon, a Scorpio moon, or a Pisces moon, you are someone who lives by their heart and values your emotional world deeply. You crave a deep type of intimacy in your partnerships and you need a partner who is going to give you that type of emotional connection. You are more private with your emotional world and you tend to hold a lot in, but this can often lead to sudden outbursts as well. Overall, you are the definition of emotion and others learn a lot from you on what it means to love and to feel.
YOUR ASCENDANT (RISING SIGN)
Your ascendant sign represents your perception and the energy you put out into the world. This is the way you come across to others, the way you express yourself, your physical traits and aesthetics, how you manifest, society, and what you expect from the world around you.
FIRE ASCENDANT (Aries Rising, Leo Rising, Sagittarius Rising)
If you are an Aries rising, a Leo rising, or a Sagittarius rising, you come across to others as confident, bold, and stylish. You are known for the way you look or the way you present yourself, and you are usually adorned in bright colors or wearing something that others take a lot of notice of. You are someone who walks into a room, and all eyes are on you, and you love that. You want to be on the move and on the go, and you love to show up in the world exactly as you are today. You see the world with a lot of possibilities and like it's yours to have fun and enjoy yourself in.
EARTH ASCENDANT (Taurus Rising, Virgo Rising, Capricorn Rising)
If you are a Taurus rising, a Virgo rising, or a Capricorn rising, you come across to others as responsible, beautiful, natural, and dependable. You are a hard worker, and you may be known for your career or the work that you do. You are someone who walks into a room and people feel an immediate sense of comfort and like you are someone they can trust. You have strong values and goals, and you are someone who knows what they want. People love to be around your down-to-earth energy, and you make others feel safe and grounded.
AIR ASCENDANT (Gemini Rising, Libra Rising, Aquarius Rising)
If you are a Gemini rising, a Libra rising, or an Aquarius rising, you come across to others as outgoing, friendly, and talkative. You see the world as a place to learn, connect, and be inspired, and you are on a quest for knowledge and understanding. You connect with people from all walks of life, and you tend to have a pretty open-minded and unique friend group. You care a lot about your style and aesthetic and always strive to be authentically you wherever you are. You can talk to people for hours and are often meeting new people and making new friends wherever you go.
WATER ASCENDANT (Cancer Rising, Scorpio Rising, Pisces Rising)
If you are a Cancer rising, a Scorpio rising, or a Pisces rising, you navigate life through the lens of your emotions, and you are deeply connected to the undercurrents of life. You are ruled by your emotions, and this side of you is not something you can keep hidden away easily. You get emotional when you think about society and others at large, and you want to be known for the kind and sincere person you are. When you walk into a room, you feel other people's energy right away and are highly empathic and intuitive.
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Featured image by We Are/Getty Images
Originally published on April 20, 2024