

A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been taking and we can't take much more of this quarantine. Even though governors are opting to open some states, we are staying at home for a little longer because outside doesn't seem quite clear yet. In the meantime, we are sitting in the comfort of our homes dreaming up our next getaway. My dream includes me sipping a spicy margarita with somebody's son in a private cabana as the waves hitting the shore.
Since we have been fantasizing over a few of our favorite frequent flyers and travel storytellers photos on the 'gram, we wanted to know how this pandemic is effecting them and what their travel plan looks like post-quarantine. Ahead, find a little relief for your burning wanderlust, as well as a dose of inspiration.
Devorah @walkwithmswalker
Photo Courtesy of Devorah Walker
"My dream trip after self-isolation would be exploring Indonesia. I had plans to visit Bali for three weeks as the pandemic was declared. I can't wait to see the views of the rice fields, hike up the mountains, beach-hop and of course go on one of Bali's famous high swings. I would then make my way East Java which doesn't have as many tourists as Bali. East Java has some of the most beautiful waterfalls in Asia, starting with Tumpak Sewu, which is breathtaking in photos. From here I would head to Komodo Island to visit the pink sand beach and of course to see a real life Komodo dragon. Indonesia was on my list for quite some time so I cannot wait to make this happen.
"I had a one month Asia trip planned to leave March 22nd. (The pandemic was declared by WHO on March 11th). I was planning to visit Singapore, Australia and Indonesia. This month-long trip was supposed to be the first step of planning an international relocation.
"The biggest lesson I've learned from this time is to enjoy being still. Previously, I barely made time for myself in terms of mentally unplugging. I was always focused on writing, editing, planning the next adventure and managing my every day life. There was never any time for a 'pause'. The pandemic brought my and everyone else's life to halt and made me realize how important it is to just be still as well as appreciate what I already have as opposed to obsessing over what's next."
Globey @globalcarnivalist
Photo Courtesy of Global Carnivalist
"My dream getaway will be euro-beach-chic, where I can tan in the sun and never have to think about putting on a sweater in the evening. I will have spa amenities available to me and while the town I decide to stay in will be posh, I will feel like I am a local. I want to submerge myself in the culture and local customs of where I am, but also enjoy the luxury of being there. I've narrowed it down to two places that would fit my ideal trip so far: Sorrento, Italy or Nice, France. I want everything that I was unable to consume while I was at home during COVID-19. Endless sunbathing, beaches, sailing, boutique shops and more importantly, true relaxation.
"COVID-19 has tremendously impacted my travel schedule. I had scheduled trips for Italy, Jamaica, Bahamas, Portugal, Toronto, Bermuda, St. Lucia and Antigua and I have had to cancel or reschedule each of them. I was able to shift some of them to later in the year. Hopefully things will be better by then, but it truly looks like I'll be spending the bulk of 2020 at home.
"The one thing this pandemic has taught me is how important it is to be at peace with yourself. I have had to self-entertain and find creative ways to just be and truly enjoy my own company and I am loving it. I've also realized how much human connection is vital to people, I have had so many friends and family reaching out for support or just someone to talk to, it truly reminds you of what is important."
"The one thing this pandemic has taught me is how important it is to be at peace with yourself. I have had to self-entertain and find creative ways to just be and truly enjoy my own company and I am loving it."
Samantha @thequeenofvacations
Photo Courtesy of Samantha Everette
"My dream getaway would be an all out Kiki in December in Johannesburg, South Africa. If you've ever been to the continent in December... then you know why. The energy and the vibes are unmatched! I can envision the afternoon braai's (South African word for BBQ's), popping bottles of champagne and dancing to Afrobeats until the sun comes up. After South Africa, I would take a three-month reset in Bali. Yes, I said three months. This would be a necessary respite for my body and my liver! Of course I would want all of my close friends and my IG travel community there with me. I envision a revolving door of friends and family dropping by my villa. There will be lots of days on the beach, mounds of freshly grilled fish and curry everything!
"I was planning on attending two ladies retreats this spring. I planned to spend the month of April in Egypt soaking up the vibes and kemetic energy by the Red Sea with @sarahwes and @returntokemet. We were going to tap into our divine feminine power and live our best lives traveling all throughout the country. I also had to cancel my trip with @theinncrowd.co to Cancun, Mexico. I always have such a wonderful time with the ladies on the Inn Crowd trips, so I'm devastated that I won't be enjoying their company.
"This pandemic has taught me just how much I value my friends and family. I've spent the better part of my adult life halfway across the world. I'm accustomed to a lot of alone time while abroad, but I always knew that I would see everyone once the journey was over. Now those trips, along with the homecomings, have been taken away. We don't know when we will be able to see all of our favorite people again. Physical distance really does make the heart grow fonder but metaphorical distance is even crazier. Everyone is so close but yet so far away and I miss them terribly."
Skylar @skylarmarshai
Photo Courtesy of Skylar Marshai
"Times like these have made me wish I lived on the beach, where I could self-isolate on the sand, in the sun! Living in New York is rough because there's so many people and so little nature. By the end of this, I'll have had enough with cityscapes and being inside, so ideally I'd be on the first flight to somewhere warm with lots of lush plant life, overwhelming amounts of decadent food, and enough sun to last me a lifetime. I've been missing Barbados, Tulum, and Costa Rica so if I closed my eyes and picked one, I'd be happy with whichever I ended up in. I'm talking fresh coconuts, waking up before the sun, actually seeing the stars, and fresh air. It's always nice to visit new places but after being in quarantine, I'd like to go somewhere that I know is a sure thing. Pure bliss. Pura Vida. The goal, though, would be to GTF, ASAP. My partner and I have been itching to create new content and I'm just tired of wearing sweatpants. I miss wandering, there's only so much of it that can be done at home.
"So many of our travel plans were changed (I can't say cancelled, gotta keep it positive!). We'd planned a trip just about every month this year so we had to rebook Bali (April), Barbados (May), St. Lucia (June), and France (end of June/July). We're now having to push all of our other travel plans further into 2021 because of it. It's been amazing that some airlines are allowing free flight changes, otherwise we'd have lost hundreds of dollars. The only other downside (other than the obvious) has been reworking collaborations with the companies we planned to work with, abroad. The brighter side is that we've been able to do more research on the places we planned to travel to that we haven't been before. So once we get to travel again, we'll hit the ground running (or rather, sprinting because whew I can't wait to be booked and busy again!)
"I recently learned this and shared it on Instagram, but the idea is that you don't have to escape to soul search. That your soul is wherever you are. I planned 7 trips last year, and another 8 this year–my head was always in the clouds, literally. Since being home, I realized I'd been so busy with wandering physically that mentally I hadn't checked in. To allow yourself to be still and present is just as important as allowing yourself space to escape. It's about balance. I saw this post on Instagram that posed the question, 'Who are you, really?' And I felt attacked! I realized I had a lot of work to do, a lot of myself left to unravel, and that this stillness would serve as the perfect opportunity to do so. You find yourself where you meet yourself, and that can be anywhere."
"To allow yourself to be still and present is just as important as allowing yourself space to escape. It's about balance... You find yourself where you meet yourself, and that can be anywhere."
Jessica @theufuoma
Photo Courtesy of Jessica Ufoama
"I'd love to go to Belize after self-isolation. I desperately want a classic Caribbean getaway - nothing beats one especially after such unprecedented times. Caribbean holidays are predictable - you know you're going to get some sun, sand and great cocktails and after such a period of uncertainty, I want to know what I'm getting into. I've always wanted to go to Belize - Caye Caulker specifically. Get some much-needed outdoor time, snorkel along the barrier reef, and feel alive again.
"I usually have a calendar full of travel plans every year but I've had to cancel them because we have to beat this virus. My trip to Afronation Puerto Rico had to be cancelled, as well as a trip to Tulum, Mexico in April. My trip to Italy in May looks very unlikely. Summer trips are looking somewhat bleak. I'm just taking life one [day] at a time now.
"The pandemic has taught me to keep being grateful for life and enjoy it to the fullest. It's taught me never to take even the seemingly mundane things for granted and every single day we get to spend on earth is a blessing. I'm looking forward to more opportunities to live life, impact my communities positively, and enjoy the gift of travel."
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our weekly newsletter here to receive our latest articles and news straight to your inbox.
Featured image courtesy of Skylar Marshai
Joce Blake is a womanist who loves fashion, Beyonce and Hot Cheetos. The sophistiratchet enthusiast is based in Brooklyn, NY but has southern belle roots as she was born and raised in Memphis, TN. Keep up with her on Instagram @joce_blake and on Twitter @SaraJessicaBee.
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
Your Glow-Up Starts Here: 15 Ways To ‘Spring Clean’ Your Beauty Routine
Now that springtime is officially present and accounted for, I wanted to find a way to put a twist to the type of “spring cleaning” that is typically discussed (check out “15 Of The Best Spring Cleaning Hacks That I've Seen In A Minute”).
For instance, in times past, I would broach the topic from the angle of relationships (check out “Let's Finally 'Spring Clean' ALL Of Our Exes Out Of Our Lives, Shall We?”) or even intimacy (check out “Yes Couples, You Can 'Spring Clean' Your Sex Life”). This year, I thought it would be cool to explore how you can get your hair, skin, and nails ready for all that this beautiful spring season has to offer.
Check out the following 15 things that you can do (five per category), beauty-wise, to embrace all that spring has in store — things that will have you out here looking even more radiant than you already do!
Hair
Getty Images
1. Clarify your hair. Sweat, dead skin cells, product build-up, minerals in your water, excessive sebum, whatever falls into your hair when you’re outdoors (like pollen) — all of these things play a significant role in why it’s important to clarify your hair from time to time and clarifying is simply about using things that will help to get rid of the residue that’s on your strands. Clarifying is actually why I don’t cosign with people who say that you should NEVER use sulfate shampoos; I just believe that you should ONLY use them to clarify your locks (so long as they aren’t too harsh on your hair).
So, what are some signs that your hair needs clarifying?
If your hair feels oily or sticky; if it’s hard for it to hold a style; if your scalp is itchy or irritated; if you notice that your hair is shedding more than it should (which is 50-100 strands a day); if your hair is dull and/or (bonus) if you are about to color-treat your hair (because build-up will make it difficult for the color to “take”). You can clarify your tresses with a clarifying shampoo (check out a list here). Or, if you’d prefer to take the all-natural route, apple cider vinegar, baking soda, bentonite clay, and even Aloe vera are awesome options (click on each of the words to learn why and how to apply them in this way).
2. Exfoliate your scalp. Honestly, the main way that I know it is time for me to wash my hair is when my scalp tells me so. When it’s itchy and/or flaking, that’s my cue. Oftentimes, what I will do is either provide my scalp with a good rinse (I really like TPH BY TARAJI Master Cleanse Scalp Treatment) or a scalp exfoliant. That’s because, just like your hair can experience residue, your scalp can as well (especially when it comes to dead skin cells and product build-up). Plus, a scalp that isn’t exfoliated can end up having clogged hair follicles which can ultimately mess with your hair growth.
If you want to go the exfoliant route, there are scalp scrubs that you can buy. You can also crush some aspirin up, add a bit of water to it, and rub it on your scalp, create a brown sugar and oatmeal scalp scrub or you can check out some other recipes here.
Getty Images
3. Address those ends. It can’t be said enough that, if you’re trying to grow out your hair, it doesn’t matter how much you take care of the roots of your hair if you’re neglecting your ends in the process. In fact, a huge part of the reason why a lot of people don’t end up reaching their hair (length) goals is because their locks end up breaking off just about as fast as their hair grows from their scalp. One way to avoid this from happening is to “baby” the entire mess out of your ends — and y’all, a product that I’ve been using that helps me to do this oh so very well is Amika Starfruit Oil. Listen, stuff that has worked for me personally, I do my best to shout-out and this product right here? It’s the truth! It’s a lightweight oil that feels kind of like a serum that really does create shine, lessen frizz and help to make your hair feel so much stronger — including your ends. Now, it ain’t cheap; still, a little bit goes a long way which makes it worth the expense (at least it does to me). Anyway, whether it’s getting a trim, dusting your ends (removing split ends and fairy knots on your own) or just giving your ends some much needed TLC, this would be the time to do it…especially so.
4. Toss out expired hair products. Be honest with me and yourself — you know you’ve got some hair products that should’ve gone on to glory a long time ago, simply because the lettering is faded and/or you really can’t remember when you purchased it (check out “Resolving To Kick Your Product Junkie Habit? Here's Your Game Plan For 2024.”). I’ll be real with you, unfortunately, most hair products don’t come with an expiration date; however, a good rule of thumb to follow is if your products change color, smell, or texture, it’s probably time to toss ‘em out.
And when it comes to shampoos and conditioners specifically, many experts say that around six months is when it’s time to get some new stuff. Oh and also, please wash your brushes, combs and clean out the teeth of your hair dryers, and thoroughly wipe off your flat irons. You’d be amazed how much gunk can get caught up in all of those things. #yuck
5. Replenish your collection with lighter water-based ones. Since warmer weather tends to lead to hair that has more oil and residue than during the cooler months, if you’re going to buy some new hair products make sure that they contain less oils and butters and more water instead. The reason why is because the last thing that you want is for it to be a nice spring-like day with the wind blowing and yet your hair doesn’t move one bit because it’s so weighed down by all of your hair products. If you’d like a few recommendations of what to get for this season, check out BuzzFeed’s “27 Products That’ll Take Your Hair From Winter Drab To Spring Fab.”
Skin
Getty Images
1. Get a professional facial. It’s pretty common that, as it heats up outside, you may want to wear less make-up — at least during the daytime hours because between the sweat and everything? It can just be easier to take the “less is more” approach. If that is exactly how you roll (or you do like make-up and you would like for it to go on more smoothly), consider getting a professional facial as soon as possible. I’m good for getting a back facial at the turn of every season and there is nothing like having a professional esthetician get all up in your skin and treat issues in ways that you simply can’t (because you haven’t been trained to).
When it comes to your face, professional facials are bomb because they can deeply cleanse, exfoliate, hydrate, improve the texture, and treat trouble areas all at the same time. I promise you, after getting a facial from someone who really knows what they are doing, your skin will glow on a completely different level!
2. Clean all of your make-up tools. Chile, guess how often the average American changes their sheets (SMDH): every 24 days…that’s damn near once a month. Now guess how often you’re supposed to do it: no less than once a week and actually every 2-4 days if you have pets or allergies. If most folks aren’t doing this, I can only imagine how few are cleaning their makeup brushes, etc. And how often should you do that? Every 7-10 days (more often than that, if you can). And although you shouldn’t wait for spring to do this, this is just a reminder to set aside a day to clean everything at once.
For tips on how to properly clean your brushes, check out the YouTube channel ItsMyRayeRaye’s post here. Tips on how to clean cosmetic sponges? Roxslayofficial’s page can help you out here. And if you tend to put your brushes and sponges in a drawer in your bathroom, invest in a nice vase for your brushes or something like a magnetic brush organizer. As far as your sponges go, a cute soap dish that has holes in it or an egg case will work.
3. Look for skincare products that contain antioxidants and ceramides. Since there’s a pretty good chance that you’ll be out in the sun more often, you need to make sure that your skin is protected from the damage that free radicals, air pollution, and UV rays can do. One way to do this is by looking for skincare products that are packed with antioxidants. Ones that immediately come to mind include vitamin C extract, and vitamin E oil as well as products that have niacinamide (vitamin B6) and polyphenols listed on the label.
Something else to look for is skin products that contain ceramides;they are lipids that easily makeup 50 percent of the outer layer of your skin. When you apply skincare items that contain them, those ceramides help to hydrate your skin, protect the barrier, and slow down the signs of aging. I use ceramides on my neck at night and baby, no regrets. Not a damn one.
Getty Images
4. Go without make-up more often. Whenever someone tells me that I don’t look my age, I thank genetics and the fact that I didn’t start wearing make-up (other than mascara and lipstick which is pretty much how I get down now) until I was well into my 20s. There is no way around the fact that prolonged cosmetic use (especially when it comes to certain ingredients), yes, can speed up the aging process of your skin. It can also lead to breakouts; cause your pores to appear larger than they actually are; throw off the pH balance of your skin; create the appearance of fine lines, and it can weaken your skin’s barrier. That’s why it’s a good idea to give your skin a break by going make-up-free sometimes.
Since spring cleaning is the theme, focus more on skincare than cosmetics so that, by the time the summer season arises, if you go swimming, you don’t have to worry about going au naturel because your natural skin will be so on-point on its own (check out “I've Been Doing At-Home Chemical Peels. Here Are The Pros And Cons.,” “Why Your Skin, Hair, And Nails Need Hyaluronic Acid Like...Yesterday” and “These 12 Things Will Make Your Skin Glow All Of The Time” for some prepping tips).
5. Don’t forget about sunscreen. BLACK WOMEN NEED SUNSCREEN — and yes, I am yelling it because I know far too many of us who were told that because our skin is so beautifully melanated, sunscreen isn’t really necessary. The lies you tell. Problem is, when you read articles like Healthline’s “The Sunscreen Gap: Do Black People Need Sunscreen?” you’ll notice that — surprise, surprise, and totally insert my sarcasm here — some medical professionals don’t emphasize the importance of us using sunscreen which causes some of us not to prioritize it.
However, the reality is that UV rays can damage our skin just like anyone else's, not to mention that sun drama can also lead to things like hyperpigmentation. So, if you’ve never used sunscreen before, make this the year that you absolutely do. Some of the best sunscreens for our skin are located here, here, and here.
Nails
Getty Images
1. Opt for a shorter length. Not to brag but I actually have some really pretty hands and nails. That’s why, before the pandemic, I was in the nail shop all of the time; however, once we went into lockdown, I decided to keep my nails low and I haven’t really grown them out since. Something about watching all of those videos about how many germs get trapped up in there just creeped me out, chile.
Anyway, since it’s spring and you’ll be outdoors, pollen is flying everywhere and you may be doing things (like outdoor sports) that require you to use your hands in a more active way if your nails are currently on the longer side right now, you might want to go with a shorter length. Not only is it hygienic and practical, from what I’ve seen (here, here, and here), but it’s shorter nails that are also trending right through here too.
2. Do a deep hand and foot soak. While certain — cough, cough — folks are out here debating about how often you should wash your feet (the things that have tons of sweat glands and literally spend most of their time on the floor or ground), I’m encouraging you to go above and beyond and do some regular foot (and hand) soaking. They’re relaxing. They exfoliate your skin. They can also help to deeply hydrate your skin. They increase blood circulation. They also help your hands and feet to look youthful for a longer period of time.
Although there are a variety of different hand (here) and foot (here) recipes to choose from, one of my faves is to soak in an herbal tea blend — one that also has some Epsom salt and coconut milk in it. Chamomile tea can help to soothe you. Sage contains medicinal properties. Hibiscus can help to even out your skin tone. Epsom salt is great because it also helps to exfoliate and hydrate. Coconut milk is awesome because it deeply moisturizes, stimulates the production of collagen and it also exfoliates too. Soaking your hands and feet for about 30-45 minutes can make your skin’s texture feel totally different. Try it and see!
Getty Images
3. Pamper your cuticles with an essential oil blend. The base of your fingernails and toenails is your nail bed and right underneath those are your cuticles; the purpose of your cuticles is to keep bacteria from infecting your new nails as they grow out from your nail bed. Honestly, it wasn’t until I started getting hangnails that I started to pay my cuticles some real attention (in between professional manicures). I was getting them because my cuticles were dry which means that I was neglecting them. Now, I’m on top of that because hangnails are ANNOYING (and sometimes even painful).
I care for my cuticles by keeping my cuticles trimmed, pushing them back and making sure that they are well moisturized. Although there are cuticle creams that you can buy, I prefer to apply a blend of tea tree oil (it kills bacteria and fungus), geranium oil (it has astringent and anti-inflammatory properties), and avocado oil which deeply moisturizes. It makes my cuticles feel and look great.
4. Go without polish for a while. Listen, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna do, it’s get a pedicure — usually twice a month. I’m so serious about it that, even the day that my house literally blew up a few years ago (check out “My House Burned Up. Three Days Before Christmas. What It Taught Me.”), after I assessed the damage (95 percent of my stuff was gone) and talked to the fire marshal about what caused it (my HVAC), I went on to my nail appointment (dead serious). Polished toes always make me feel better and you can’t steal my joy. That’s why I hate it when my nail tech will tell me that it’s time to take a polish break sometimes.
Still, I heed the advice because, when your fingernails and toenails aren’t given the opportunity to breathe, that can lead to fungal and bacterial growth, weaker nails, dry nails, permanently stained nails, and all sorts of other drama. Ideally, since your toenails especially are covered up more in the fall and winter months, that would be the most ideal time to follow through with this particular suggestion. If you didn’t do that, though. Give your nails a month or so without any polish over the next few weeks. It might feel rough at first but it’s worth it in the long run.
5. Return to polish with lighter hues. When it comes to nail polish hues, I tend to lean into the darker ones. Spring isn’t really the time for that, though. Yeah, if ever there is a time to go with some Easter egg colors, the spring season would be it. And as far as spring color trends for this year go, you’re super stylish if you go with light neutrals, bright green, or pearly shades — or you can get super creative via InStyle’s “20 April Nail Ideas to Freshen Up Your Manicure.”
And speaking of polish (and spring cleaning), I’m pretty sure you’ve got some old bottles that need to go. For the most part, their shelf life is between 12-24 months. If it’s been longer than that, let them babies go. It’s spring. Time for new things, sis. NEW THINGS!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by PeopleImages/Getty Images