Is It Too Soon To Move In Together? Here Are Some Signs To Consider
If you've ever been in a serious relationship, chances are you might have considered moving in together at one time or another. And if you're having doubts about readiness or the stage of your relationship, the question "How soon is too soon to move in together?" might currently be on the brain. Well, the truth is, deciding when is the right time to cohabitate with a partner comes easily for some but can be more complex for others.
How Soon Is Too Soon To Move In Together?
Moving in with a partner is an exciting step in a relationship, but one that requires careful thought and consideration. It's essential to ensure you and your partner are ready for such a significant change in the landscape of your relationship. While there's no one-size-fits-all answer to the question of timing, paying attention to the signs below can help you make an informed decision about whether or not it's too soon to move in together. Here are ten signs to consider:
1. You haven't spent enough time together.
Spending real quality time together before making the leap to living together is a prerequisite you can't afford to miss. So, if you and your partner haven't spent a substantial amount of time together, moving in could be premature. Living together requires a deep understanding of each other's habits, communication styles, and quirks. Take the time to learn more about each other to increase your chances of a smooth transition when it's finally time to move in with each other.
2. The decision feels rushed.
Deciding to move in together should never be rushed. If the idea of moving in together has come up suddenly and you haven't thoroughly discussed your expectations, it might be wise to take a step back. Rushing into such a significant decision due to pressure can lead to misunderstandings and even regrets. Take your time to discuss your expectations, responsibilities, and goals for living together.
3. There are important conflicts that haven't been resolved yet.
Moving in with lingering unresolved conflicts can put a strain on the relationship. Being able to be met with conflict and navigate it effectively to resolve disagreements is essential to the flow of any partnership and if you find you're struggling with effective communication, it might be a good idea to pump the brakes until you no longer do. Do your best to address and work through major issues before sharing a living space.
4. You struggle with boundaries and personal space.
Maintaining personal space is vital regardless of your relationship status, and this becomes even more important when sharing a living space. If you or your partner have difficulty respecting boundaries or struggle with respecting personal space, moving in together might lead to frustration and resentment.
5. You and your partner have different goals long term.
If you and your partner have significantly different long-term goals, moving in together might not be a good idea. Having incompatible long-term goals can make sharing a living space challenging. This should be a step that aligns with both of your aspirations, as differing goals can lead to tension and conflict down the road. Make sure your visions for the future align to avoid potential issues down the line.
6. You can't have open and honest communication.
Effective communication is the cornerstone of a successful relationship, especially when considering such a significant change. Not being able to come to your partner from a place of honesty could be a red flag in a relationship, so it is essential to work on open and honest communication with your partner before signing the dotted line to a mortgage or a lease. If you can't talk about the hard stuff now, what happens if there are challenges later? Don't wait until you're bound by a contract to realize your communication breakdown could prove to be a breakdown of your relationship.
7. You're not financially compatible, or at least not on the same page about money.
One thing about finances is it can create a strain in even the strongest relationships. If you and your partner have vastly different financial habits and priorities, moving in together without resolving these differences could lead to major tension. Things like having different financial habits, priorities, or approaches to budgeting can be a surefire make or break, so it's crucial to address these differences before cohabitating.
8. You do not have a strong enough sense of self outside of the relationship.
Before moving in together, it's important for both partners to have a sense of independence and self-reliance. If one or both of you rely heavily on the other for emotional or practical needs, cohabitation might hinder personal growth. Having a solid sense of self and striving for interdependence versus codependence can contribute to a healthier and more fulfilling shared living experience.
9. You're concentrating too much on a 'feeling' versus a foundation.
Moving in because you're swept up in the excitement of being in a new relationship might not be the best reason to decide to live with someone. It's vital to differentiate between fantasy and reality. When deciding to move in with someone, make sure that you take the time to understand the pros and cons of moving in with someone and know that it's much easier to build a life on a strong foundation than a weak one.
10. You are allowing external pressure to make a decision for you.
Making the decision to move in together solely due to external factors, such as financial strain or familial expectations, can add a lot of unnecessary pressure to your relationship. It's important to prioritize your relationship's well-being and make choices based on what's best for you and your relationship. Deciding to cohabitate with someone should be a mutual choice driven by your feelings and sense of readiness, not external factors.
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If you decided that moving in together is the step you want to take, here are some general tips to consider before moving in:
- Getting to Know Each Other: Take the time to really understand each other's habits, preferences, and values. The more you know, the smoother the transition can be.
- Communication is Key: Have an open conversation about your expectations, boundaries, and long-term goals. Being on the same page can help avoid misunderstandings later on.
- Relationship Stage: Think about how long you've been together. Some people wait until they've been dating for a while to make sure the relationship is solid, while others might move in sooner.
- Personal Readiness: Consider your own personal journey. Are you emotionally and mentally ready to share your space with someone else? It's important to be in a good place on a personal level.
- Balancing Priorities: If you have individual goals, like starting a business or finding financial security, think about how living together might impact those aspirations. Would living together be a hindrance to your potential for growth?
- Gut Feeling: Trust your instincts. If something doesn't feel right or you're having doubts or anxiety about living together, it might be worth waiting until you're more sure of this next move (pun intended).
Remember, healthy relationships thrive on open communication, mutual respect, and shared goals. Paying attention to these signs can help you make an informed decision that aligns with your relationship's readiness and compatibility. Take your time, have those important conversations, and ensure that moving in together aligns with both of your paths and visions.
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A Cosmic Guide To Love In 2025: What The Stars Have In Store For Your Heart
The most important lesson we are learning about love in 2025 is change. Many major Astrological transits are happening this year, and these will last for years to come. As we walk through this new year, we are being asked to let go of the things we can’t control, and give more grace to the things we can. This is a year of a new perspective on love, finding gratitude in the little things, and watching as the universe supports us and the dreams we build for ourselves here.
At the beginning of the year, we are being shown how significant 2025 will be for love. From March 1, 2025, until April 12, 2025, Venus, the planet of love and relationships, will be retrograde. Venus goes retrograde approximately every 18 months and hasn’t been retrograde since the Summer of 2023. With love taking a step back at the beginning of the year, we move through a time of understanding the emotional world better and letting go of trying to control outcomes here.
What Does 2025 Have in Store for Love?
It’s time to refocus your relationship priorities overall, and with this retrograde happening in both Aries and Pisces, Aries being the first sign of the zodiac and Pisces being the last; there is a chapter we are closing and a new one we are walking into.
Another significant factor that is influencing relationships this year, is Jupiter’s entry into Cancer. Jupiter brings blessings, abundance, luck, and expansion, and in water sign Cancer, brings these gifts to your emotions. Cancer rules emotional safety, foundations, close loved ones, family, support, and emotional well-being, and with Jupiter in this sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, we experience blessings in stability within love. This is a good year for building stronger foundations in love, aligning with those who are loyal and supportive, knowing what you need emotionally, and being a lot clearer on it.
Letting Go of the Past: The Astrological Theme of 2025
Overall, the guideline for the year when it comes to love is to focus on the bigger picture and let things work themselves out without forcing them to. Magic will come in for you this year when you can assess your needs and wants, let go of illusions or smoke and mirrors, and focus on the things you want for yourself rather than what you don’t. Your focus and beliefs on love are the priority right now, and things will be coming full circle for the better.
Read below to see your personal 2025 love forecast. Read for your sun, moon, and rising signs.
What Does Your Zodiac Sign Say About Your 2025 Love Life?
ARIES
2025 is one of the more significant years for you, Aries. A lot of the major transits are happening in your sign, which includes Venus retrograde in Aries at the beginning of the year, Neptune in Aries from March 2025 until 2039, and Saturn in Aries from May 2025 until 2028. Not to mention, Chiron, the wounded healer is currently in your sign until 2027.
What this means for you when it comes to love, is that you have learned a lot about where you want to be here, and it’s the year to implement more of these tools and knowledge of the heart.
This year for love is about honoring your integrity and what you need personally to thrive in life and creating that space to let it in. You need someone who will be there for you through whatever you are experiencing in life and not someone who adds to these challenges. This year is a time of rising above, and choosing better for yourself.
TAURUS
2025 for you when it comes to love, is all about perspective and taking better care of your heart, Taurus. Uranus, the planet of change, rebellion, progress, and upheaval, has been in your sign since 2019, and this year you get a break from all of the surprises. From Jul. 7, 2025, until Nov. 7, 2025, Uranus leaves your sign and enters Gemini, giving your mind and your heart some time to breathe.
This year you are being given the opportunity to see things for what they are, rather than what you fear them to be. You are able to see your relationship dynamics clearer, allowing you to feel more confident in what you are building and creating for yourself in this area of your life. What you are working on this year is letting go of overthinking, and allowing things to play out the way they are meant to in love.
GEMINI
This year you are feeling in balance when it comes to love, Gemini. Relationships are important to you in life overall, as you are a relationship-oriented sign, but it can be difficult at times to keep the balance and perspective here. This year, with lucky Jupiter in your sign until June, you have the opportunity to be blessed with some fortunate circumstances personally and within romance.
You are feeling yourself this year, and this is attracting you success and new opportunities within love.
Uranus will also be in your sign this year from Jul. 7 until Nov. 7, and some surprises are in store for you. Pay attention to what happens in your love life during this period, as similar themes will be coming back around for you when Uranus officially enters its Gemini transit from 2026 - 2032. Overall, this year is about balancing what’s coming and going in love, and finding your peace within your inner confidence for it all.
CANCER
2025 for you, Cancer, is about stability in love. You are growing emotionally from the ground up, and are feeling a sense of support, confidence, romance, and receptivity in your love life this year. You are one of the lucky signs of 2025, and this is due to Jupiter, the planet of blessings, entering your sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026. While Jupiter is in your sign, your life expands and you are able to see the gifts of your world that may have been harder to come by previously.
This is a year of spending more time with your loved ones and feeling more heard and supported emotionally. Safety and security are especially important to you this year, and you are only entertaining the people who feel that way about you and provide that. Many Cancers will be expanding their families this year or developing a long-term relationship, and overall this is a year of feeling stronger when it comes to love.
LEO
When it comes to love this year for you, Leo, it’s about trusting your intuition and listening more to what your heart is telling you. There are not many major transits happening in Leo in 2025, which means there is a lot of room to grow, but you may be feeling a lack of support or encouragement to do so. A lot of Leos are taking a step back to look at where they are currently in love, and yearning for some change and a new direction here.
Neptune will be in your 9th house of adventure for most of this year, and you are being asked to get inspired and do things differently, but don’t take unnecessary risks in love that may not serve you in the long run.
It can be easy to get lost in the fantasy of love rather than the actual reality you’ll live in here, and taking more time to understand yourself, your relationships, and the dynamics in your love life will be necessary. Overall, your heart is healing this year and you are moving away from the past and creating your new future.
VIRGO
This year when it comes to love, you are going through changes that are aligning you closer to your goals and dreams here, Virgo. You are focused on making things work that you want to see bloom, and also letting go of putting effort into people that aren’t reciprocating the same energy. With the North Node entering your sister sign Pisces and the South Node moving into your sign from Jan. 11, 2025, until Jul. 26, 2026, you are doing a lot of letting go over the next year.
However, with the North Node being in your 7th house of love, new doors and gifts are also opening up for you and your partnerships. The more you can let go of perfection and overworking your mind and your heart, the more blessings you will experience when it comes to love this year. In 2025, you also have two Eclipses in your sign, and there are overall a lot of changes Virgos are moving through this year. Your main guidance for love is to stand by the things that serve your heart and release yourself from what burdens it.
LIBRA
Love is coming to fruition for you this year, Libra. You have been through a lot in your personal life these past few years, and walking into 2025, you are ready for some positive change. This is a year of feeling in balance with your personal goals and dreams, and what you are experiencing romantically and financially as well. Relationship dynamics are serving you and your sense of abundance, and many gifts are coming your way in love this year.
With Neptune, Chiron, and Saturn all being in your 7th house of love, your love life and partnerships are the main focus for you in 2025.
You are moving through changes, overcoming previous obstacles, and bringing back the dreamy energy here. With Chiron in the 7th, you are still doing some healing of the heart, but with Neptune now entering, it all feels a little more romantic and spiritual at the same time. This year is about believing in the impossible in love, taking care of yourself, and allowing someone else to take care of you as well.
SCORPIO
This year is all about opportunity when it comes to love, Scorpio. You have your eyes on the prize and are focused on what you want for yourself, but also how you want to show up for love as well. You have goals and intentions that you are setting for your love life this year, and a lot of them reflect the passion and strength you are feeling as you enter the year. Vesta is in your sign this year until September, and you have a spark within you that is a magnet for success and love. You are walking forward confidently and are feeling inspired, sexy, and magical this year.
This is a very sensual and powerful year for you, and this energy is being reflected in the relationship experiences you are having. Jupiter also enters your 9th house of adventure halfway through the year, and there is something special about the trips you are taking and the risks you are taking in love. Overall, this is a year of doing things your way and attracting love to you through your inner confidence and charisma.
SAGITTARIUS
This is a beautiful year of feeling balanced and abundant in love, Sagittarius. There is a lot of energy coming in and you are giving a lot of love as well. This sense of synergy you are feeling within your love life this year has a lot to do with Juno, the asteroid of soulmates, in your sign from Feb. 19 - Apr. 15. Your people are coming in and you have options this year, Sag.
This is a year of feeling loved for the inspiring, outgoing, and unique being you are, and meeting more people who match your energy.
Saturn also enters your 5th house of romance this year, and you are learning a lot through your experiences with others. You are learning how to be more confident in who you are and what you want for yourself and also recognizing the importance of making more time for fun and playful experiences. This is the year to see love as a more light-hearted experience and to not take yourself too seriously.
CAPRICORN
You are letting things come to you when it comes to love this year, Capricorn. You are feeling beautiful, capable, and worthy, and you are receiving the gifts that come from this sense of confidence and patience. This past year, you were setting a lot of new goals for yourself and your relationships, and in 2025, you are experiencing the results of these efforts.
Jupiter moves into your sister sign Cancer from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, and enters your 7th house of love, partnerships, romance, marriage, and harmony. Your love life and experience of it all are expanding this year, and benevolent Jupiter is sending blessings to this area of your life. This is a year of things coming full circle for you in love, and you feel less confused about it all and more sure of yourself and what is becoming for you here.
AQUARIUS
Love is a highlight for you this year, Aquarius. You are coming together with another, and many Aquarius’ will be forming new relationships or growing within a strong relationship. You are experiencing the fruition of your dreams in love, and are also able to heal and let go of past emotional experiences that have been overwhelming for you in the past.
The North Node enters your 12th house of closure this year, and you are motivated towards change, cleaning house, and releasing the cobwebs of the past.
You are walking into new emotional experiences with less baggage and self-doubt, and are experiencing a fresh start in love. This is a year of asking for what you need emotionally and receiving it. Love is coming in for you in harmonious and magical ways, and you are rewriting your story in love in 2025.
PISCES
You are moving through a lot of changes when it comes to love in 2025, Pisces. This is a year of closure, healing, and giving yourself a fresh start, and the way you enter the year will be a lot different than the way you end it. The North Node of Destiny enters your sign this year, and the South Node of Karma enters your 7th house of love. So, a lot of your focus this year is on your personal goals and path, and there may be some neglect or lack of focus on your relationships.
This can create some discord with those close to you, and your guidance for this year is to try to balance the personal successes and wins you are experiencing, with the love changes that also need your attention right now. Know that what leaves your life this year is being replaced by something better, and also know that your healing doesn’t need to have a timeline and you can take as much time as you need to grow. Overall, you are turning a new page in love in 2025.
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What To Do When Politics Get Personal & Start Affecting Relationships
It is a challenge to have a “no” opinion on politics these days, especially when you’re talking about the overall health and well-being of women.
With so many viral moments and controversial events that took place both during and post the 2024 presidential election, many women online have spoken out about cutting ties with friends and loved ones alike, raising questions on personal relationships vs. political convictions. Believe it or not though, not everyone can afford to simply cut people out of their lives so abruptly. So, what then?
As a woman, it may be uncomfortable trying to coexist in a shared space (i.e., work, school, church, family gatherings, etc.) with someone when it feels like they might have voted to support policies that harm women. However, “People are not just their political choice,” according to dating and relationship expert Alex L. Merritt.
She adds, “Ambitious women have a notion where to prove to me you care, you must do these things, and that (simply) doesn’t work. It’s a setup for consistent disappointment. People are voting because of ‘their’ interests. No one is doing things with you at the center of their mind.”
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She believes that women, especially Black women, often want to feel special and chosen because that’s how we usually show up for others. She encourages women to think differently, and sometimes, that might even mean redefining what it means to “protect your peace.”
Oftentimes, people associate cutting ties with someone as an effort to “protect their peace.” While space should surely be held for that, it’s also important to know that experiences in life will require you to work through your discomfort, not abandon it.
“We live in a world where you can opt-out and not do the work, or you’re going to agree to do life solo for the rest of your life,” Alex says. “That’s a small world to live in. [It] gives you a reason to not engage. It’s coming from a good spot of not wanting to be hurt, disappointed, or played. You will have more of what you don’t want to experience if you focus on what you don’t want.”
Accepting people for who they are might also help you better coexist with them. “Accepting doesn’t mean agreement, “ Alex says. “The path to peace is accepting the things I can change, and that’s not other people. Observe and see who people are, understand the conditions of that person, and show up to make sure you’re covered.”
If it’s worth it, try to find other ways that you can relate to someone who thinks differently than you. Sometimes, all we want is for people to see us as individuals.
Communicating with someone with opposing viewpoints allows you to see each other as humans “first.” According to Alex, “The aim should be walking in love and building relationships. We are created to be in community. In order for us to thrive and be well, we need community. Period.”
Another important tip on how to navigate difficult relationships is to not employ yourself to make every encounter with someone, a teachable moment. Everyone doesn’t “need” to know your viewpoints on controversial topics and vice versa. Don’t exhaust yourself with thinking you have to save people from their thoughts. We all have access to the same social media and the same internet.
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If people think differently than you, then that’s based on other lived experiences that you may not have; respect that. Just because someone disagrees with you, it is not an invitation to start a confrontation. Disagreements usually leave room for everyone to gain a better understanding as well. Try to make more efforts to be curious rather than defensive during these conversations to avoid feeling attacked.
Ultimately, there is nothing to feel guilty about when making a decision that will make you feel safe. It is, in fact considered a form of self-care. But if you don’t have that option, before you attempt to walk away, make sure you’re always leaving space to see the human in people.
To learn more about Alex and her “Dessert and Discussions,” you can follow her on her INSTAGRAM at Alexthelovengineer.
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