Tiffany Haddish, comedian and actress, was recently asked to host the 63rd annual Grammy Award pre-show and declined the offer when the recording academy told her it was unpaid. In addition to paying her own way, they also mentioned they would not be covering hair, make-up, or any wardrobe for the course of the event. As Haddish mentioned:
"All of that would have to come out of my pocket. I don't know if this might mean I might not get nominated ever again, but I think it's disrespectful."
I don't know about y'all, but I'm sick and tired of hearing the continuous disrespect towards Black women. People are just tripping over their words claiming it to be a mistake or a misunderstanding.
According to a SAG-AFTRA spokesperson, the host of the Grammys is required to be paid at least $5,000 due to union minimum wage negotiations. While Haddish would just be the host of the pre-show of the awards ceremony and not the actual show, even $5,000 is no money considering the stripes Haddish has earned over the course of her career so far, not to mention the cost of wardrobe, hair, and make-up. How is this even possible for the most significant music award ceremony in the world to expect the best quality from their talent and provide the least amount of tools and resources to be equipped for the job?Tiffany Haddish saying "NO" to the Grammys signified her knowing her worth.
Tiffany Haddish GIF by National Geographic ChannelGiphyThough Haddish was nominated for her second Grammy this year for best comedy album for Netflix's Black Mitzvah, it's still not worth her accepting zero compensation for hosting their award show. They don't even pay their performers and presenters; the Grammys is all about keeping the profit to themselves versus sharing their wealth.
It's 2020; Black women should not just be earning a seat at the table but also be valued as much as their white counterparts. And until that changes, they need to keep amplifying their truth for the system to evolve and pay Black women what they are worth.
As Haddish noted:
"I was like, 'The exposure is amazing, but I think I have enough. I appreciate you guys asking.' And as much as I appreciate the honor of being nominated, that's not OK."
Apologies are nice, but we want more.
In response to her rejection of the offer, Recording Academy Chief Harvey Mason Jr. posted a video on Instagram apologizing to Haddish and mentioning that he also found the offer disrespectful.
"Unfortunately, and without my knowing, the talent booker working for the Academy told Ms. Haddish that we wouldn't even cover her costs while she hosted this event for us. To me, that was wrong. I'm frustrated by that decision. It was a lapse in judgment, it was in poor taste, and it was disrespectful to the creative community."
He said that Haddish allowed him to have a private conversation with her, apologizing to her directly. "Tiffany, we are sorry, and thank you for allowing me to speak on it," he concluded.
Apologies are nice and all, but we are demanding more. This is far from the first time a Black woman's work have been misvalued or undervalued. Tiffany Haddish has been featured in movies and TV shows as an actress, comedian, writer, and producer. Why does she need to host the Grammys for free when she could be spending time on an event that pays her?
Black women need to be valued the same as their white counterparts. An award ceremony as big as the Grammys should host their own show since they clearly can't afford to pay her. We've been running this race too long, working two to three times harder just to be allowed in the same room as our white counterparts. It's the passive-aggressive invite, and be happy you got an invite because we rarely include your people for me.
It's the expectation that we should just take what we're given because that is the structure America has always placed Black people in.
Well, that ended the day Tiffany said "no", because she knows her worth. You don't bend backwards for another party that doesn't care about you, that's disrespectful, and Black women deserve better.
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Featured image by Silvia Elizabeth Pangaro / Shutterstock.com
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The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and SkylarCj Hart @hartbreakToday, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak