You know it and I know it. Whether it's those cute lil' shorts that we bought on sale last fall, the swimsuit that we copped while on vacation, or the sexy strappy dress that hugs our curves in all of the right places, if there's any time of the year when we're out here showin' off the gorgeous melanin that God blessed us with the most, it's during the summer season. This means, if there's a time of year when we're also focused on making sure that our skin is as flawless as possible, it would be Memorial Day weekend (even though, this year, summer officially begins on June 20) through Labor Day weekend (even though, this year, summer official ends on September 22).
There are a ton of products on the market that claim to give you the glow that you're looking for, but if you'd prefer to take a more holistic approach, these 10 tips will have your skin looking just the way you want it to—all summer long (and beyond).
1. Eat Foods That Will Protect Your Skin from the Sun
Just like there are foods that can protect our natural-born melanin (what? You didn't know? Check out a list of those here), there are others that can actually protect our skin from the sun's damaging UV rays. Some of those include blueberries (the antioxidants fight off the sun's free radicals); tomatoes (they contain lycopene which absorbs both UVA and UVB radiation); cauliflower (it has the alpha-amino acid histidine in it which absorbs UV radiation); green tea (it contains catechins which fight sunburn inflammation); red grapes (they've got phytonutrients that help to prevent sun damage that can ultimately leads to skin cancer); dark leafy greens (they contain the antioxidants lutein and zeaxanthin that halt the cell growth that's related to UV damage), and watermelon (which has 40 percent more lycopene than tomatoes do!). All of these are good for you on a myriad of levels, so eat up as much as possible in the weeks to come.
2. Switch Your Soap Up
Hopefully, you're not someone who uses deodorant soap a lot (because it tends to be very drying). But just in case you are, make sure that you switch over to a more "fatty (acid) soap" (Dove is a good example) during the summer months. Not only will it help to moisturize your skin, but it will create a thin protective "film" that can keep your pores from scorching in the summer sun.
If you're into making your own soap, try and add some palm kernel oil to your recipes; it has lauric acid, myristic acid and oleic acids in it that can also protect your skin during this particular time of the year.
3. Get Dead Skin Cells Off of Your Body
If you want less acne, dull-looking skin, big pores or skin drama all the way around, exfoliating the 40,000-per-minute dead skin cells that you shed is an absolute must. While there are exfoliants that you can buy, you can also keep some coins in your pocket by making some from the comfort and convenience of your home as well. Combining some brown sugar and olive oil will certainly do the trick (feel free to watch Ebony Christina's DIY video on how to make it here). Or, if you want to try a recipe that helps to get rid of razor bumps while clearing up any skin discoloration you might have, Kaice Alea's YouTube channel has your back. You can check her recipe out here.
Boost Up Your Collagen
There's nothing sexier than creating that glistening summer glow. On the outside, bronzer can make that happen. On the inside, getting more collagen into your system is a surefire way to have your skin looking beautifully youthful. While there are collagen supplements that you can take, there are also foods that have lots of collagen already in them. Some of those include berries, garlic, bone broth, fish, chicken, carrots, bell peppers and pumpkin seeds.
5. DIY a Grapeseed Oil Toner
Skin toners are dope because they help to balance your skin's pH balance, deep clean your pores, make your pores appear smaller, hydrate your skin and they can even assist with preventing ingrown hairs. If you add a little grapeseed oil to your toner during the summer season, the oil will offer your skin cells the support that they need to repair and rejuvenate themselves, so that your skin has less fine lines or wrinkles and more of a radiant appearance.
6. Spot-Treat Pimples
I don't know about y'all but something that gets on my very last nerve during the summertime is body acne. Actually, I don't really get breakouts so much as a few pimples here or there. Still, they show up at the most inconvenient times and sometimes leave a mark that takes several weeks to go away. I'll tell you what, though, something that nips them suckers right in the bud is tea tree oil. All you've got to do is put a little of it, right on the pimples themselves, and thanks to the oil's anti-inflammatory and antimicrobial properties, you should see a noticeable difference in how inflamed the pimple is within 12-24 hours and a much smaller zit in 48. Another thing that I like about this oil is it reduces the appearance of scarring too.
Just a heads up, if you've got sensitive skin, you might want to mix the oil with a carrier one like jojoba or sweet almond oil. Tea tree oil is super potent and if your skin is sensitive (or you've already popped the pimple), it could cause a bit of a burning effect. You want to avoid that if you can.
7. Put a Scrambled Egg on Your Face (No Joke)
If you've read the health and wellness pieces that I do often enough, you know that I try and find items that make you be like "huh?" Well, today's offering are scrambled eggs. Word on the street is if you put a scrambled egg on your face, the warmth of the egg will not only be soothing on your skin, but it will cause the protein from the egg to penetrate into your pores faster and result in smoother skin and less wrinkles. While I know it might sound crazy, when you think about the fact that egg masks exist…it's probably not as wild as you might initially think…huh? (Make sure you scramble the egg only to get the best results.)
8. Apply a Little Papaya
If you're a fan of papaya, this is the perfect time of year to cop some; that's because it's in season from early summer through the fall. On the health tip, papaya is good for you because it contains a ton of Vitamin C, along with a good amount of Vitamin A, fiber, protein, folate and potassium to help keep your heart strong, fight inflammation and yes, even protect your skin from sun damage.
But the specific reason why I chose to feature it in this article is because, if you want to have less body hair this summer, papaya is an awesome natural hair remover too. All you need to do is mix a half-teaspoon of mashed papaya with half-teaspoon of turmeric powder, rub it onto the areas of your body where you want to see less hair growth (over time) for 15 minutes before rinsing off. If you do this 2-3 times a week, the enzyme papain (that's in papaya) will start to weaken your hair follicles and hinder regrowth. How cool is that?
9. Soften Your Cracked Heels
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As far as summer beauty goes, I'm not sure if there's ANYTHING worse than seeing someone with some killer sandals on while their heels looking like they've been in a fight with a flour bag for two days. One way to prevent yourself from being this kind of statistic is to take extra care of your heels. A pumice stone (to exfoliate). Some (DIY) heel balm. Honey (if you apply it to already cracked heels, it will help to heal them). Coconut oil (to fight off skin infections). Shea butter (to deep moisturize). If you've got these five things in your skincare arsenal, your heels will look just as fly as those shoes you've been waiting to rock!
10. Make Your Own “Soda”
One more. Since one of the best keys to fresh, healthy and glowing skin is water, and also since we typically lose more fluids during the summer season, of course, taking in more water is paramount. While it's recommended to drink 64 ounces (roughly eight glasses) of water everyday during most of the year, from June through September, bump that up to 100 ounces (around 12 glasses), if you can.
If you're like me and water isn't exactly your favorite thing on the planet, try making your own soda to make consuming it easier to do. I personally just get some sparkling (or even mineral) water and add either some fresh fruit or juice to it. It's refreshing, it tastes great, and I'm still able to keep me and my skin well-hydrated in the process. Here's to the best summer skin of your entire life, y'all!
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
The Mecca Of Fashion: The Top Street Style Moments At Howard Homecoming
Outfits were planned, bags were packed, and cameras were ready to capture Howard University's collegiate spirit during its centennial Homecoming celebration. Not only does it hold the number one ranking as the most elite Historically Black College and University or its top performing academics, diversity of students and alumni, but the HBCU also leaves a legacy of style and grace.
The essence of effortless poise and refinement shines bright through the iconic university colors of indigo blue, red, and white. Every October, Howard University students, alumni, staff, and friends gather on the prestigious campus in Washington, D.C. to take part in time-honored traditions and events, which is Homecoming. This year's theme, “The Meccaverse,” was a week-long celebration of Howard University’s heritage, including the Homecoming football game and Bison Pep Rally, the Fashion Show, Greek Life Step Show, Homecoming Day of Service, Lavender Reception, and the iconic Yard Fest Concert.
As 2024 marked the 100th anniversary of the Howard Bison trek back to The Mecca and after two years of virtual events due to the COVID-19 pandemic, this was to be a celebration of a lifetime. We enlisted HU alumnus Sharmaine Harris, a luxury retail buyer, as she revisited her alma mater as eyes on the yard for fashion-forward outfits mixed with personal style and campus pride for the weeklong celebration.
Before we get to the looks, discover how attending Howard University impacted her career in fashion and her day-to-day style:
Credit: Sharmaine and Friends
xoNecole: Describe your personal style. Did attending Howard have any impact on developing it?
Sharmaine: Howard taught me that there’s no such thing as being TOO dressed. There’s always a reason to “put it on” and look presentable, even if it’s just for a day of classes. Standing out was celebrated and encouraged with my peers embracing the opportunity, giving me the confidence to try new styles and trends.
xoNecole: How did Howard shape your career as a luxury buyer?
Sharmaine: I studied Fashion Merchandising, through which I was fortunate to have professors who were very connected to the industry and able to give first-hand accounts of opportunities and what to expect post-college. I was also able to build a network through my peers and other Howard Alum, which has opened doors to endless possibilities both within fashion as well as daily life.
The same confidence instilled in me through my style has also been rooted deeply within me as I step into any role or project I’m faced with throughout my career.
xoNecole: This year marked Howard’s 100th-anniversary Homecoming celebration. Can you describe what the weekend looked and felt like?
Sharmaine: I’ve gone to many Howard Homecomings since graduating, but this year’s 100th anniversary felt like a huge family reunion filled with nothing but love. It was beautiful to see so many Bison return home looking great and radiating joy. It was beautiful!
xoNecole: What makes Howard fashion different from other HBCUs?
Sharmaine: Being that Howard is The Mecca, we have such a diverse population with each individual having their own spin on fashion. Getting dressed is second nature for us, but the layered confidence is our secret ingredient to make any look come together. Through that comfortability to push barriers, we have a legacy of setting trends, as indicated by the many alumni we have in the fashion and entertainment industry.
Keep scrolling for the top street style moments from The Mecca's Homecoming weekend:
Credit: Lacey Gallagher
Credit: Alan Henderson
Credit: JaLynn Davis
Credit: Dylan Davis
Credit: Caleb Smith
Credit: Kendall W.
Credit: Jordyn Finney
Credit: Vanessa Nneoma
Credit: Dr. Mariah Sankey-Thomas
Credit: Caleb MacBruce
Credit: Tiffany Battle
Credit: Teniola
Credit: Ilahi Creary
Credit: Nicolas Ryan Grant
Credit: Dylan Davis
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image courtesy of Sharmaine Harris
So…I wanna say that it must’ve been when I was either in the seventh or eighth grade that I participated in a series of etiquette classes.
As antiquated as that might sound to some these days and although I don’t remember a ton about them, what I am forever grateful for is learning how to properly set a table and what utensils to use at big formal dinners. When you’re a kid, you think stuff like that is totally unnecessary. Oh, but grow up, move in some circles and you’d be surprised how much random tips will hold you down in a pinch.
Anyway, in my personal opinion, when it comes to sexual activity, there should also be etiquette that should be applied — you know, “rules of conduct” (or engagement) for how we should expect to be treated and how we choose to treat others. Because, even if you don’t hear about sex being presented in the form of needing to have manners, having a certain level of decorum, and/or requiring a mutual level of dignity, that should absolutely be the case.
And just like some of the lifestyle etiquette tips that I learned back in the day have stayed with me all of this time, it’s my hope that if you aren’t applying (or requiring) the following 10 sex etiquette suggestions (all 10 of ‘em too) that you will start…so that they will remain with you as well.
1. Discuss Sex-Related Things That Will Directly Impact Y’all’s Health
GiphyDoes even one day go by when someone on Instagram, X, or TikTok isn’t talking about why someone should or should not know another person’s body count (check out “6 Things About The Whole 'Body Count' Debate That Should Be Discussed”)? Although I have been known to say that the kind of things we’re proud of, we tend to brag about without hesitation, that doesn’t mean that I think people are owed that type of information.
That being said, that doesn’t mean I’m not aware that there is science to back up that the more sex partners men have, the more that they increase their chances for being diagnosed with cancer; that a higher amount of sex partners can impact whether or not you get married (and that it tends to lead to divorce more often as well), and that an uptick in partners can even increase your chance of becoming a substance abuser.
Not to mention the fact that, as Dwayne Wayne once said on A Different World episode (that featured a great performance by Tisha Campbell), “the longer the list, the greater the risk” (of contracting an STI/STD) — however, if we’re looking at this point from nothing more than a sexual one, really what someone deserves to know is if you’ve been tested for STI/STDs within the past 6-12 months and, if not, if you’re willing to get tested prior to having sex with them. Anything else really is privileged information and totally up to the individual to share — both directions too.
2. This Includes Afterplay. Beforehand.
GiphyChile. I can’t tell you how many times someone has told me that they found themselves either embarrassed or flat-out pissed about how a sexual experience went. It wasn’t because of the sex itself; it was more about how things were handled afterward. Now, if you’ve never seen the (wow) 35-year-old film When Harry Met Sally (Billy Crystal, Meg Ryan) before, there’s a scene where Billy Crystal’s character talks about men trying to figure out in their mind how long they should hold a woman after having sex with her.
To me, the modern version of this is after sex, when someone asks, “So, what are you about to do?” because that sounds like code for, “You ain’t got to go home but…” Listen, when two people have real feelings for each other and/or are in a long-term dynamic, this point is — or at least, should be — pretty irrelevant.
However, if you’re in a casual sex dynamic or a situationship, I promise you you're putting yourself in a position to “feel some type of way” if you merely assume that afterplay means cuddling all night long while he thinks it’s more like polite convo for 10 minutes and then bouncing (or vice versa). If you don’t want to be bedside blindsided, discuss beforehand how you each prefer to get down.
3. Ask Before Sexting
GiphyI don’t care if the two of you have never had sex before or if you’ve been doing it for a while at this point, but if sexting has never (pardon the pun) entered the chat, you both really should ask before you start sending NSFW stuff into each other’s devices. Some people don’t like it. Some people prefer to know when stuff like that is coming because they don’t want what is being said or shown to be exposed to those around them.
Some people prefer not to “shift gears” (as far as their energy field is concerned) when it comes to being in one mindset and all of a sudden receiving sex-related content that they weren’t prepared for. Believe it or not, there is data to support that the art of sexting can improve coitus overall. However, the same research says that it needs to transpire under the umbrella of mutual respect and clear communication. I agree 1000 percent.
4. No Means No. This Applies to Us Too, Ladies.
GiphyMedia culture can be so…irresponsible, sometimes. Since we’re talking about sex, specifically, today, take when it comes to men and sex. Contrary to popular belief, no, that is not all that they think about and no, they aren’t always in the mood — for a myriad of reasons. And that’s why, I think it also should go on record that just like it’s wrong for a man to try and push a woman past her “no,” women shouldn’t do it either.
It truly isn’t said enough that you shouldn’t simply call it seduction if a guy doesn’t want to and you keep trying to get him to anyway while defining it as coercion when the shoe is on the other foot. The saying “no means no” shouldn’t have a gender bias on it. Everyone should have their boundaries respected — at all times too. Full stop.
5. A Clean and Comfortable Scene
GiphyFresh bedding. A clean bathroom. A washcloth and towel for your partner. Flip-flops (to walk around and/or take a shower in). Lubricant. Bottled water. These are the kinds of things that immediately come to mind when I think of what should automatically come with someone spending intimate time in your home. It’s also what you should be fine with requiring should you choose to have sex at someone else’s house too.
Because even if there aren’t things like scented soy candles and a ton of ambiance, you and your partner at least need to feel like you both are in a space that is clean. This should be a hands-down non-negotiable, by the way.
6. Turn ALL Devices Off
GiphyI don’t know if this means that the sex is/was really wack or you’re just a phone addict in denial but if you are “one out of every five individuals” who checks their phone during sex, I’ve got a bevy of questions for you. SMDH. For this one, in general, though, I don’t have a lot more to say other than, I don’t know how anyone could think that checking their notifications during sex — any kind of sex — isn’t rude as hell and definitely a reason for someone to hard pass on wanting to “engage” with them ever again.
So yeah, for this one, let’s go with an automatic “all devices off” rule. Since most people only want sex to last somewhere between 7-13 minutes anyway (is that per round…or???), I’m pretty sure that whatever IG Live that you’ve been waiting on can wait. Goodness.
7. Have Your Own Stash of Condoms on Deck
GiphyAssuming that the guy should always bring the condoms is about as sexually irresponsible as a guy thinking that he doesn’t need them because the woman he’s about to have sex with should be on birth control. My point here is that you really need to have your own condom collection. One, so that you’re always prepared. Two, so that you can select the condoms that you prefer (most guys are totally fine with that). Three, no matter what you might think that it implies, mature folks get that it means you are serious about protecting your health and well-being.
And what if discretion is what you’re the most concerned about? No worries, there are all kinds of condom carriers out here that basically look like tiny wallets (for example, here).
8. Keep Cleansing Cloths Around
GiphyHygiene is important, is it not? Although going into graphic detail about it may be something that most people would want to avoid, sometimes sexual activity happens spontaneously with no bathroom close by. And listen, even if the movies act like (for instance) oral sex after getting all sweaty from dancing all night in the club is hot, my mind automatically goes to it being kinda gross. So, at least keep some rinse-free cleansing cloths on deck if you don’t want to wait until you can hop into a shower. A pack in your purse or glove compartment can go a really long way. Straight up.
9. Don’t Be a Show-Off
GiphyOne guy who I had sex with back when I was in college, I was so excited about — initially. At the time, he was fine, and then some mo’ fine. To be honest, although we were very cool and spent a couple of years on campus together before I — eh hem — indulged, the main reason why I wanted to sleep with him is because I thought that his looks were a preview of his performance level. Boy was I wrong. Any time I refer to our, umm, time together, I call it “Cirque du Soleil sex” and even that is being generous because that man was trying to put me into every twist and turn that he could in under 20 minutes.
It’s like he was trying to prove that he could hold it down…and all that ended up doing was backfiring — supremely so. Moral to the story here: sex should be about two people enjoying each other, not low-key trying to compete or “outdo” one another. Anyone who says otherwise is truly bringing poor form to the bedroom, whether they realize it or not.
10. Watch Your Words. Afterwards.
GiphyOn the heels of what I just said, if sex with your partner was pretty much the equivalent of watching paint dry, it’s still important to be thoughtful about what you say. Lack of empathy, being inconsiderate of their feelings, talking to them in a way that would damn near cause you to blow a gasket (or melt into the floor) if they did the same thing to you — all of this files under hella rude behavior.
And while we’re here, please watch your body language — you know, heavy sighs, eye-rolling, stonewalling…if you don’t want to have sex with them again, that is totally your right; that doesn’t mean that you have to humiliate them in the present, though. You know, A LOT of people carry their ego in the bedroom — male and female.
That’s why I write articles like “So, 10 Women Sat Down And Told Me Why They Fake Orgasms...More Times Than Not” and “Men Fake Orgasms (And 14 Other Semi-Random Things About Them In Bed).” So, whatever transpires, try to be kind and compassionate. Karma shows up, even in the bedroom. Make sure it’s proud of how you handled yourself. One way or another, you’ll be glad that you did.
____
Sex etiquette. As you can see, it’s a very real and necessary thing. I’m curious, though. When you get a chance, hop in the comments to share some other “copulation manners” that you think are important, along with how you handle matters when they are missing or go awry. Hey, when it comes to having better sexual experiences, we’re all in this together.
Kinda. Sort of. You know what I mean. LOL.
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