
How To Have A Truly Wonderful Christmas (If It's Not Really Your Thing)

A couple of weeks ago, someone decided to give me a mini-sermon about why I should make a bigger deal out of Christmas than I do. Chile. Let me just say that since I’m an origin person, I’m at perfect peace with holidays not being “my thing” — and no, I am not a Jehovah’s Witness. I just like to do research and I also watched pretty much every episode of The Boondocks…including when Huey broke Christmas down.
So, while I’m not out here protesting the day or thinking that folks are crazy for observing it…I am totally at peace with my own stance. Plus, as people who are all gung-ho about it worry that I am feeling lonely and depressed by skipping out on the festivities, years of not doing so have actually made Christmas become one of my favorite times of the year — just…in a different way…and for a whole ‘nother set of reasons.
And that’s what inspired me to pitch and pen this particular piece. Because, although there may not be a ton of people who think like I do, I have run across enough of them to know that some folks just don’t do Christmas “like that,” for whatever their personal reasons may be. And so, if you happen to be one of them, one, I wanted you to not feel alone (you are absolutely not) and two, I wanted to offer up a few ways that you can still have a wonderful December 25…anyway.
1.Take a Trip
Do yourself a solid and get away for a little bit.
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Again, even though Christmas ain’t my personal get down, it’s not like I’m a Grinch or anything. In fact, when it comes to these first two points, I actually feel kinda bad for the fact that I can recommend them — because that means there are individuals who will be working on Christmas Day. Yet, that’s the way our society is and so yeah…if you don’t plan on observing this year, one thing that you can do is go on a quick trip because two things that will be open on Christmas are airports and hotels.
Now in order to do you a solid, I did some research and it appears that Fridays are pretty much the worst days to travel, period, as far as crowds are concerned. And since, this year, Friday is just a few days before Christmas (because Christmas falls on a Monday), it will also be the most expensive. So, when is the best time to go? Christmas Eve, believe it or not. Most people will already be where they want to go and, since you couldn’t really care less about Christmas anyway if you happen to arrive somewhere late — it doesn’t really matter.
And what if you’d prefer to drive a rental car? Rental car companies are open too although it’s pretty common for no rides to be available. This means that you need to look into booking one NOW. You could be stuck and pissed otherwise.
2.Or Have Your Own Kind of Staycation
If you don't travel far, switch up the scenery by having a staycation.
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What if you’d prefer to stay closer to home yet would still like to have a change of scenery? Why not go the staycation route and book a hotel room in your own city? One of the best things about this option is that many hotels have deals on Christmas Day. Plus, even if Christmas isn’t your thing, there is still something pretty about the décor — and a lot of hotels go all out. Not to mention the fact that they oftentimes take their menus up a few notches if they happen to offer room service or there are restaurants attached to their establishment. Some of the best hotels in the country for this time of year are located here.
Or you can just stay at your house and do absolutely nothing. I’ve done that many times and when I tell you that it’s especially relaxing on Christmas because the world is so quiet? It really is top-tier. No one is calling you. No emails are coming through. Throwback movies are on TV all day long. Chinese restaurants are yours for the taking (LOL). You can sleep in all day and night if you want to — who is going to notice or care? I’m telling you, a Christmas staycation? Very few things in life will ever top it.
3.Order Takeout Beforehand
Take some of the holiday pressure off by ordering dinner ahead of time.
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For those of you who do observe the holidays, dinner will probably have you working in the kitchen. Yeah, let’s not even talk about how much Christmas isn’t much of a day off for those who celebrate it. For those of us who don’t? We don’t have to get out of the bed or off of the couch, AT ALL, if we don’t want to. Just order some takeout and call it a day.
That said, although it’s not a lot of stuff, stores like CVS and Walgreens and y’all’s almighty Starbucks (although it is slated to close early) will be open on Christmas Day. So will IHOP, Domino’s, and, of course, McDonald’s. Other than that, though, if you’re looking to do some shopping or eating out on Christmas Day, you really need to plan ahead.
Shopping-wise, get whatever you need, I’d say before noon on Christmas Eve. And if your plan is to order food, get it delivered to you either on the 23rd or by noon on Christmas Eve. I mean, you do know how to warm stuff up, right? And make sure to tip big. Folks deserve a shout-out for working on Christmas Eve. No wiggle room on that.
4.Totally Unplug
Opt out of being plugged in, and opt into unplugging.
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A few years ago, I penned an article for the site entitled, “8 Solid Reasons To Put. Your Phone. Down.” When you get a chance, check it out because there are so many benefits that come from “fasting from your phone” every once in a while. And what better day to put these points to the test than on Christmas Day? Because really — other than maybe your mama or grandmama, who’s going to be calling you anyway?
Usually, what I will do is discipline myself to stay off of the phone and off of my PC. Whatever is happening, it can wait. And not being “plugged into” stuff means that you can read a book, binge-watch a show (Okay, that’s technically using an electronic but…), or play some of your favorite music while sitting in the tub and reheating the water for a couple of hours.
As someone who is personally becoming more of a minimalist by the second, one of my favorite sites on the topic said that unplugging (especially from social media) can decrease feelings of jealousy and loneliness. How ironic is it that, by getting away from all of the noise of phones and the internet, on a day when so many people are spending time with others, you can be alone and NOT feel lonely? I’m sold.
5.Get Yourself a Present
Treat yourself with a Christmas gift this Christmas.
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If there’s one thing that I’m gonna do, it’s give. Everyone in my world knows this about me. And no, I’m not going to wait until a special occasion to do it. If you’re my peeps and I see something that you might like, it’s as good as got. My 12-year-old and four-year-old goddaughters know this about me as well. They also know that I couldn’t care less about Christmas — so no one is asking me to do anything on or for that day. This means that my money is totally freed up to — hallelujah! — treat myself and that’s exactly what I did this past pay cycle. When I tell you that there is a leather bag from overseas that I’ve been eyeing for a few months now…and since there is no Christmas present pressure looming over my head, I just bought it? Talk about joy unspeakable! (LOL)
I don’t look at it as a Christmas gift for myself. More like a “I won’t go into debt buying it this month” type of token. Anyway, I encourage you to have a similar frame of mind. Just because Christmas may not be your thing, that doesn’t mean that you can’t splurge on yourself a little bit. We all should prioritize that a few times a year. Why the heck not? As the throwback L’Oreal ad used to say — you’re worth it. TOTALLY.
6.Do Some New Year Planning
You don't have to wait for the New Year to start planning and organizing.
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Personally, something else that I’m not really big on is New Year’s Resolutions (check out “Forget New Year's Resolutions, Try This Instead.”). My main reason is that there is nothing supernatural about January 1. This means that whatever you’re waiting until then to do, 9 times outta 10, you can start doing it right now. However, if you are someone who waits until the turn of a new calendar year to make some new (or different) things happen, you can get a leg up on Christmas Day. Because let’s be real: I’m not sure that any week moves faster than the one that is in between Christmas and New Year’s Day and so, what’s the point in pressuring yourself to set some short or long-term goals (check out “Here Are 10 Personal Development Goals We All Should Make”) if you can plan them ahead of time with as little stress as possible?
Whether it’s jotting stuff down, creating a vision board, or doing a bit of home office organizing — if Christmas isn’t a big deal to you but New Year’s Eve and Day are, you can enjoy them fully without any resolutions pulling at you. You used Christmas to knock those out. “Problem” solved.
7.See People on Boxing Day Instead of Christmas Day
Celebrate an alternative version of Christmas through Boxing Day.
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It’s actually a friend of mine who’s from Bermuda who introduced me to the concept of Boxing Day many years ago. Long story short, back in the day, the day after Christmas was when servants got off to spend with their own families. It’s also when rich folks boxed stuff up and gave it to the poor. Fast forward to now and, for many, it’s the time when they will take gifts to people who aren’t their relatives (or aren’t the ones who they spent Christmas with).
Where am I going with all of this? Whenever people ask me if I ever go to visit folks at all on Christmas, if I choose to, it’s usually on Boxing Day. I like for folks to spend time with their families on Christmas. However, since a lot of them typically take the following day off too, Boxing Day is a cool time to check in without any extra Christmas rah-rah or them feeling pressured to have a gift waiting on me like they would if it was Christmas Day. As a bonus, there are leftovers for days — so it’s a win/win all the way around. Trust me.
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Whether it’s your first year laying low on Christmas or you’ve been doing it forever, just know that I see you and it’s all good. You don’t have to observe the day to make it a good one. So please, sis, make sure that you do.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Your April 2025 Horoscopes Are All About Softening Into Love & Speaking Your Truth
April is a month to slow down and to fully grasp what has been. The month starts in fiery Aries Season, but we are also in the thick of Retrograde Season as we begin the month as well. Thankfully, Mercury finally goes direct on April 7, after being retrograde mid-March, and communication matters are clearing up. This is a month of mental clarity, a fresh start, and not being afraid to dream a little bigger.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, and this Full Moon brings relationship and financial matters full circle. This is the time to let go of what doesn’t make you feel balanced or in harmony and to create space for more peace to enter your life. Venus goes direct in Pisces on the same day, after being retrograde since March 1, and love is healing. With Venus now direct, there are more opportunities for commitment and longevity in love, and there is overall a greater feeling of romance, receptivity, and compassion in the air now.
Mercury enters Aries from April 16 until May 10, and what you were trying to see through or understand better while Mercury was retrograde here last month, you are experiencing a breakthrough now. Mercury in Aries is insightful and courageous, and people are more likely to speak their minds and initiate conversation with this energy. Mars then enters Leo from April 18 until June 17, reminding us that sometimes it’s okay to be a little more selfish and to focus on what you need right now. Mars in Leo brings forth confidence, creativity, and passion, and brings an exciting energy to charge of your life and advocate for yourself.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, bringing some earth sign energy into the mix, grounding and nurturing what you are creating in your life right now. On April 27, we have a New Moon in Taurus, and this is an abundant and fruitful New Moon. This is one of the best New Moons of the year for you to set your intentions for your financial world and a time for seeing new opportunities for abundance. On the last day of the month, Venus moves into Aries until June 6th, and love requires a little more passion, independence, and excitement during this time.
Overall, April is a month of feeling things through, taking more intuitive risks, investing in yourself, and balancing your needs with the needs of your relationships.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what April has in store for you.
ARIES
April is your month to shine, Aries. With the chaos of March now over, you are starting to see the progress of where life is and how everything has turned out even better than you were expecting. The month begins with the Sun in your 1st house of self, and you are feeling more confident, courageous, and in tune with yourself. With a Full Moon in your sister sign on April 12, relationships are also coming full circle for you now, and you are claiming your peace this month.
Mercury finally goes direct on April 7 and then enters your sign from April 16 to May 10, and this is going to clear up any miscommunications that you have been through. With Mercury now in your sign, your conversations are lively, your mind is inspiring, and you are thinking one step ahead. Before the month ends, Venus enters your sign from April 30 to June 6, and love is also moving forward for you now. Overall, this is a month where you are experiencing some happy outcomes and loyal support.
TAURUS
April is a month of passion and purpose, Taurus. You are living in your abundance, and are focused on valuing yourself and the things you are bringing to fruition right now. Venus, your ruling planet, goes direct on March 12 after being retrograde in your financial house since March 1, and you are moving into the month experiencing more opportunities and also feeling more respected in what you are accumulating for yourself and standing your ground on.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, and it’s all about you right now. This Taurus Season is smoothing things out for you in love, with new relationship developments unfolding and life flourishing for you. The New Moon this month is in your sign on April 27, it’s time for a new beginning. You are truly embracing your strength in April, making things happen for yourself, and no longer doubting your future and what is possible for you.
GEMINI
This month is all about the options becoming available to you now, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month on April 7, you no longer feel as held back or out of place as you may have in the past weeks. With Mercury now direct, your thinking is clearer, and you are seeing the opportunities in your career and professional world that you may have missed before.
The more you can embrace your authenticity, the less time you will spend doubting how others perceive you, remember that this month.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, highlighting the romance in your life and bringing forth understanding and compassion within your close relationships. You are letting go of old attachments or self-doubts that haven’t been serving your love life, and are growing closer to your own heart in the process. Before April comes to an end, Mars enters your 3rd house of communication, and you are overall leaving the month focused on your progress, your vision, and taking up space because you deserve to.
CANCER
This month is all about balancing your time and energy wisely, Cancer. You are being reminded not to overwork or overwhelm yourself in April, and to focus on doing the things that are within your control right now. The Sun is in your 10th house of career for most of the month so you are feeling really passionate about the things you are developing in your life right now, but it’s all about finding the right balance between your personal goals and your needs in your relationships as well.
The Full Moon in Libra on April 12 will be a time to devote your energy to self-care, close loved ones, and overall getting some time to decompress. You are ready to let go of the things that don’t make you feel safe or nurtured and are receiving an emotional renewal right now. The New Moon in Taurus at the end of the month is a time to focus on your intentions on your community, friendships, and aspirations in life, and to pay attention to where you can create more abundance here.
LEO
Things are turning around for you for the better, Leo. April is a dynamic month, and you are owning your inner alchemist. With a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication on April 12, you are getting the messages you have been looking for and the mental clarity you have found is bringing closure to some of your close relationships. This month is about being flexible and trusting the changes that are happening for you right now.
On April 18, Mars enters your sign until June 17, and this is huge for you. You began the year with Mars retrograde in your sign, so you are getting the opportunity now, to rewrite some of the things that weren’t working for you at the beginning of the year. You are overcoming previous obstacles, and experiencing a breakthrough in your life this month. Before April ends, there is a New Moon in Taurus, highlighting your career, reputation, and professional life. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for what goals you want to come to fruition for you now.
VIRGO
This month is all about building new foundations in your life, Virgo. You are feeling more supported and in tune with your own inner needs and interests, and it’s bringing you closer to people and systems that resonate. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct this month on April 7 after being retrograde for the past few weeks; bringing more clarity, understanding, and compassion to your partnerships in life. You are focused on love this month and are working together with others to make your dreams come true.
Mid-month, Mars moves into your 12th house of closure and endings, and there is a journey of healing that you experience until June 17. You are motivated to understand yourself better and are looking at the past more right now in order to do so. This is a month of recovering and healing from what has been, for new foundations to be built upon. The New Moon on April 27 is a beautiful way to end the month, as you are getting glimpses of a new, abundant, adventure that is ahead of you.
LIBRA
This is a big month of closure for you, Libra. The Sun is in your 7th house of love for most of April, and your heart is in the right place. With Venus, your ruling planet, going direct on April 12 after being retrograde since March 1, you are finally able to take a breath. You are not experiencing as many obstacles when it comes to communication matters and you are feeling like you have the tools you need to move forward right now.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on April 12, and you are ready to let go of what isn’t working for you. You have been through a lot recently and have gained the clarity you need to let go of old attachments. Venus moves into your house of love before the month ends, and you are leaving the month feeling more in tune with where things are moving forward for you, rather than what you are leaving behind. Your heart moves through a journey in April, and your emotions are showing you a lot.
SCORPIO
April is a month of success, progress, and dreams coming to fruition, Scorpio. You are focused on your health, your priorities, and creating space for the new beginnings that you are creating in your life right now. The Full Moon mid-month is a big closure moment for you, and you are owning the fact that you have healed and you are no longer the same person you were in the past. This is a month of stepping into your power and feeling supported in doing so.
Mid-month, Mars enters your 10th house of career and public life and you are shining within your purpose. Over the next month and a half, you are going to be gaining some new opportunities that will be serving your professional life and goals. This is the month to show up and to let your skills, talents, and authenticity shine. On April 17, there is a New Moon in your opposite sign, Taurus, and you are leaving the month with some pleasant surprises in store for you in love as well.
SAGITTARIUS
April is a new beginning for you, Sagittarius. You are focused on putting the action and effort behind your goals, and you are being proactive within the opportunities that you are looking for right now. With a Full Moon in your 11th house of aspirations mid-month, you are letting go of the way you thought things would play out for you and are owning a more abundant version of things.
On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus, which will be highlighting your health and what your body needs more of right now. This is a New Moon to set your intentions for your everyday life and to create a new, beneficial routine that will make things easier for you at the end of the day. Before the month ends, Venus enters your 9th house of adventure, and you are leaving the month with your sights set high. Travel plans are likely, and this is a good time to create some new plans for yourself.
CAPRICORN
April is about putting one step in front of the other with patience and dedication and trusting the decisions you are making for yourself right now, Capricorn. The Sun is in your 4th house for most of the month, and you are yearning for your safe spaces, comfort foods, and loyal people. Giving yourself more time to decompress, take care of yourself, and ground your energy is essential this month.
Mars enters your 8th house of transformation mid-month and will be fueling your need for some change, excitement, and emotional rejuvenation over the next month and a half. You are entering an impactful moment of the year for you, and you are motivated toward change right now. The New Moon at the end of the month is in a fellow earth sign, highlighting the romantic new beginnings you are entering now. Overall, this month is a process, and you are opening new doors while finding gratitude in what is here for you now.
AQUARIUS
April is about giving yourself time to process, accept, and gain a new perspective, Aquarius. You are being guided towards friendship, connection, and community, and are understanding what may be creating the discord in your life that has been distancing you from that. The Full Moon this month is happening in Libra on April 12, and you are ready to let go of feeling like you have to do it all at once or all alone. This month is a reminder to take your time with all the experiences you want to have, trusting that they will come to fruition for you.
Mars enters your house of love and partnership on April 18, and you enter a passionate and steamy time. Romance is in the air for you as you move through the month, and you are spending more of your time with those who you want to move forward with. Venus also moves into a relationship area of your chart before April ends, and you are surrounded by love and community. Overall, this month is showing you that you are not alone and you don’t have to go through the heavy stuff alone either.
PISCES
This is a month where your heart is shining, and you are feeling in tune with the progress you have made in your life and within your relationships, Pisces. You are owning your value, your worth, and the beauty of who you are, and are ready to leave the past behind. With Mercury and Venus both going direct in Pisces this month after being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you are in a better space than you have been, and there are fewer obstacles and miscommunications in your life.
You have been through a journey of understanding yourself better through your goals, perspectives, and interests, and have been committing yourself to your authenticity. On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus happening, and this New Moon is a good time for communication matters, getting your message across, and for your creative pursuits. With the clarity you feel within your mind and heart right now, you are making a lot of progress in April and feeling pleased with where life is headed.
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Tia Mowry Is "Doing Everything But Worrying" About Being Single Right Now — And TBH, Same.
Tia Mowry is in her self-empowered, healing era and letting the world know that being single in her 40s isn't something to be feared: It's something to be celebrated.
In a recent Instagram Reel, the 46-year-old The Game alum shared a montage of her life post-divorce: parenting her two children, Cree and Cairo, pouring into her haircare brand, getting glam for events, spending time with her village, and simply enjoying her own company. Her text overlay of choice? “Doing everything but worrying about being single in my 40s.”
And our good sis didn't stop there. Alongside the Reel, she included a refreshingly honest caption:
"There’s this stigma that we shouldn’t be single in our 40s, like thriving on your own isn’t an option. At one point, I thought the idea of being ‘alone’ was scary… but now that I’m here? I’m not scared anymore.
After a 22-year relationship and a divorce that was finalized in April 2023 from actor Cory Hardrict, Tia has been navigating a new normal. And while she’s not afraid to admit that loneliness happens, she’s also redefining what fulfillment looks like on her own terms. In her words:
"I’d be lying if I said I’ve never felt lonely, but it happens. Because I love LOVE! But that’s not the only thing we should measure our happiness on, or the only thing that defines us. And we definitely shouldn’t stress over whatever timeline has been forced on us."
Her reflections echo a deeper part of her healing journey she has been super transparent and forthcoming about the ebbs and flows of. As she shared in an episode of her WE TV reality series that aired last year, Tia Mowry: My Next Act:
"So it’s been about a year and a half since I got a divorce, and I am slowly learning who I am. I came into this world with a twin… and right after that, I went into a 22-year relationship, so I have never been alone in my life.
In the same episode, she also got candid about the emotions that come with co-parenting, even when done healthily. After dropping off her 6-year-old daughter Cairo at Cory’s house, Tia got emotional during her confessional interview, saying tearfully:
"I feel like one of the hardest things that I’ve had to adapt to, is dropping my kids off at their dad’s house. I’ve always wanted the family dynamic of having a mom and a dad in one household. And when you’re dropping your kids off, you actually, visually see how that is no longer."
But what her latest post so beautifully reminds us is that healing doesn’t have to look like rushing to fill a void, it can look like learning to sit with yourself, like yourself, and accept yourself. After years of defining parts of herself through her closest relationships, first as a twin, and then later as a wife, Tia is finally learning what it means to be her own anchor.
She’s nurturing herself, pouring back into her own cup, discovering what lies on the other side of fear, and sharing the wisdom with others that comes along with that inner work. Speaking of which, Tia had one more bar to deliver before closing out her post as she concluded her caption, "So whether you find yourself single in your 20s, 30s, 40s, or even 50s… just know, we’re all going to be OK."
Poetry snaps, chile.
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