As a doula, a word that comes up sometimes is definitely “infertility.” If you’ve ever wondered how common it is,reportedly 1 in 5 women in this country (who are of reproductive age) will struggle with conceiving a child within a year of intentionally trying.
There are two things that you should immediately take away from this. One is that, if you’re trying to make a baby, you need to give yourself a year of having sex (2-3 times a week is good) before wondering if you or your partner has any type of fertility issues, and two, if it’s been more than 12 months, you should speak with your doctor as soon as possible to see if some underlying causes are standing in the way of you receiving a positive pregnancy test result.
While you’re trying, it’s also a good idea to take note of the fact that there are certain things that can literally stand in the way of having a smooth conception. Below, I’ve enclosed 12 — some things you may know, and some just might surprise you. Either way, the more you know about what to avoid when it comes to fertility, the easier it will be to get pregnant. Ready?
1. Gum Disease
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Honestly, I don’t know if it will surprise you or not to know thata little over 47 percent of people have some form of gum disease.Left untreated, it can lead to autoimmune diseases, diabetes, hormonal imbalances, heart disease, and yes, infertility — in bothmen and women. When it comes to us, whileresearchers are still trying to get to the root of it all, what they do know is women with oral health issues tend totake longer to conceive than those who don’t.
Also,non-white women tend to be more vulnerable to gum disease than white women. Bottom line, if you’re trying to get pregnant, that’s even more of a reason to brush and floss regularly and to keep up with your annual dental appointments as well.
2. Fast Food
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Did you know that, reportedly,2 out of 3 people consume some sort of fast food on a weekly basis? Not only that, but 13 percent of folks eat some form of it on a daily basis (which is not good — check out “Why You Should Consider Leaving Fast Food Alone”). On the infertility tip, fast food works against pregnancy because not only does it make it2-3 times harder for women to conceive,but the trans fat that’s in a lot of processed food messes with a man’s sperm mobility as sugary and processed foods canalter the environment of a woman’s womb in a negative way.
Does this mean that you can never have a French fry if you’re trying to make a baby? No. It just means that you need to cut way back and you should eat homemade meals that containfruits, veggies, and whole grains more.
3. Energy Drinks
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You can’t get pregnant without a male’s assistance (even if it’s just his sperm), so if you’re trying to get pregnant the old-fashioned way, please discourage your partner from consuming a lot ofenergy drinks. Although some studies reveal that they do very little to a woman’s reproductive system, they can reducethe chances of “easy” conception for men by as much as 54 percent. Theridiculously high levels of caffeine that are in energy drinks play a role in all of this. I’ll get more into caffeine later.
4. Artificial Lighting (at Night)
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Say that you’re someone who likes to sleep with some sort of light on in your room, you’ve got a neon light in your home office, or you can spend hours reading by a lamp with no problem. While in most instances, this is fine, if you’re trying to make a baby, lighten up on that some. As crazy as it might sound, artificial lighting has also been directly linked to fertility issues. Apparently, it can mess with your body’s internal clock and ultimately throw your hormonal balance off — and that can make it more difficult to conceive. Hell, I’m a doula, and the first time I heard that, it tripped me right on out.
5. The Quality of Your Cervical Mucus
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Long story short,cervical mucus is what your cervix produces. During various times of your menstrual cycle, it will change. However, when it comes time for you to ovulate, you will typically produce more of it, and it will be slippery and clear. This is a good thing because if you’re trying to conceive, that type of mucus will make it easier for sperm to move about in. Since an increase in estrogen helps to make your mucus ideal for pregnancy, this is just one of the many reasons why it’s a good idea to get your hormone levels checked if you’ve been trying to get pregnant for 6-8 months and you’ve yet to experience any success.
6. Breastfeeding
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If there are two fertility myths that really need to go away, stat, it’s that you can’t get pregnant while you’re on your period (you can if your menstrual cycle is unpredictable because that means your ovulation one is as well;it’s just not super common) and you can’t get pregnant while you’re breastfeeding. On the breastfeeding tip, whileduring the first six months of feeding a newborn, there is reportedly a 98 percent chance that conceiving another child won’t happen; after that, you could be in for quite a surprise. Bottom line here is, if you want to get pregnant back-to-back, breastfeeding can make it difficult, difficult yet not impossible. If, on the other hand, you want to wait a while…for the sake of your uterus’s health, 18 months between pregnancies are ideal.
7. Caffeine
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Everything in moderation, right? If you’ve ever heard that caffeine can impact infertility, the reality is thata couple of cups of coffee probably won’t. At the same time,the combination of stress and caffeine consumption can do a number on male infertility, and too much caffeine could potentially affectthe contractions of your fallopian tubes when it comes time for you to release your eggs. Again, coffee at the beginning of your day anddark chocolate (which also has some caffeine in it) can actually help with fertility — so while caffeine isn’t exactly the devil when it comes to getting pregnant, do make sure to not go overboard when it comes to consuming it.
8. Lubricant
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Lubricant can make for a really good time when it comes to sex (check out “The Wetter, The Better: 10 Creative Ways To Use Lubricant”). If you’re trying to get pregnant, though, do your best to go without it. The reason why is because some of the ingredients that are in the popular types of lubricants actuallycan mess with sperm’s mobility. Know what else is wild? Saliva can too. So, what should you do? From what I’ve read and researched, a hydroxyethylcellulose-based can help you out. While we’re here, if you’re thinking of going with a carrier oil, grapeseed and avocado should be OK; do avoid sweet almond, though.Some studies have linked it to premature births (the more you know).
9. Unsafe Sex
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When it comes to this one right here, if you’re thinking, “Who uses birth control when they’re trying to get pregnant?” — that’s a fair question and not exactly where I am going with this. What I mean by “unsafe sex” is, it’s important that you and your partner get a full blood workup if the two of you are ready to have a baby; that’s because STIs/STDs can make getting pregnant difficult — if not impossible — too. In fact, two of the most common ones (chlamydia and gonorrhea) are the greatest culprits. And since there are20 million new cases of STIs/STDs annually — well, just something else to keep in mind if you want to get pregnant (or are having trouble trying to).
10. Fad Diets
Although you’ve probably heard thatbeing overweight can make it challenging to get pregnant (because it plays with your hormones),crash dieting so that you can get to an ideal weight isn’t the smartest move either. A big part of the reason is that when you’re underweight, that can alter how much estrogen your body produces, estrogen that is needed to help you to get pregnant in the first place. So, whether you’re trying to lose weight because you know that you need to or because you want to “drop in order to gain,” speak with your doctor about the wisest way to go about it. These fad diets out here could be working against not for you.
11. Not Enough Seafood
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If you’re all about seafood, that can seriously increase your chances of conception, especially if it’s fish. Yep, there are studies that reveal that eating seafood on a weekly basis can make you want to have more sex, can improve the quality of your partner’s sperm, and can make ovulating easier to do. One study even revealed that 92 percent of couples who had fish on a regular basis got pregnant within a year compared to only 79 percent of those who didn’t. Pretty wild, right?
12. Phthalates
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If, off the top of your head, you don’t know what phthalates are, they’re chemicals that are found in a lot of plastics, including (oftentimes) bottled water and even the wrappings that fast food comes in (SMDH). The reason why they aresuch a no-no when it comes to conceiving a child isthey can make it harder to get pregnant; plus, they can cause oxidative stress, inflammation, and even premature births, autism, and ADHD in your baby later down the pike.
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A baby is a blessing. What makes it even more divine is when conception is as seamless as possible. Well, you know what? If you take good care of your health and pay attention to what I just said, you are significantly upping your chances of that happening for you.
Here’s hoping that you do — and please, have tons of fun while you’re trying! #wink
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Overall, April is a month of feeling things through, taking more intuitive risks, investing in yourself, and balancing your needs with the needs of your relationships.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what April has in store for you.
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleARIES
April is your month to shine, Aries. With the chaos of March now over, you are starting to see the progress of where life is and how everything has turned out even better than you were expecting. The month begins with the Sun in your 1st house of self, and you are feeling more confident, courageous, and in tune with yourself. With a Full Moon in your sister sign on April 12, relationships are also coming full circle for you now, and you are claiming your peace this month.
Mercury finally goes direct on April 7 and then enters your sign from April 16 to May 10, and this is going to clear up any miscommunications that you have been through. With Mercury now in your sign, your conversations are lively, your mind is inspiring, and you are thinking one step ahead. Before the month ends, Venus enters your sign from April 30 to June 6, and love is also moving forward for you now. Overall, this is a month where you are experiencing some happy outcomes and loyal support.
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleTAURUS
April is a month of passion and purpose, Taurus. You are living in your abundance, and are focused on valuing yourself and the things you are bringing to fruition right now. Venus, your ruling planet, goes direct on March 12 after being retrograde in your financial house since March 1, and you are moving into the month experiencing more opportunities and also feeling more respected in what you are accumulating for yourself and standing your ground on.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, and it’s all about you right now. This Taurus Season is smoothing things out for you in love, with new relationship developments unfolding and life flourishing for you. The New Moon this month is in your sign on April 27, it’s time for a new beginning. You are truly embracing your strength in April, making things happen for yourself, and no longer doubting your future and what is possible for you.
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleGEMINI
This month is all about the options becoming available to you now, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month on April 7, you no longer feel as held back or out of place as you may have in the past weeks. With Mercury now direct, your thinking is clearer, and you are seeing the opportunities in your career and professional world that you may have missed before.
The more you can embrace your authenticity, the less time you will spend doubting how others perceive you, remember that this month.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, highlighting the romance in your life and bringing forth understanding and compassion within your close relationships. You are letting go of old attachments or self-doubts that haven’t been serving your love life, and are growing closer to your own heart in the process. Before April comes to an end, Mars enters your 3rd house of communication, and you are overall leaving the month focused on your progress, your vision, and taking up space because you deserve to.
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCANCER
This month is all about balancing your time and energy wisely, Cancer. You are being reminded not to overwork or overwhelm yourself in April, and to focus on doing the things that are within your control right now. The Sun is in your 10th house of career for most of the month so you are feeling really passionate about the things you are developing in your life right now, but it’s all about finding the right balance between your personal goals and your needs in your relationships as well.
The Full Moon in Libra on April 12 will be a time to devote your energy to self-care, close loved ones, and overall getting some time to decompress. You are ready to let go of the things that don’t make you feel safe or nurtured and are receiving an emotional renewal right now. The New Moon in Taurus at the end of the month is a time to focus on your intentions on your community, friendships, and aspirations in life, and to pay attention to where you can create more abundance here.
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleLEO
Things are turning around for you for the better, Leo. April is a dynamic month, and you are owning your inner alchemist. With a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication on April 12, you are getting the messages you have been looking for and the mental clarity you have found is bringing closure to some of your close relationships. This month is about being flexible and trusting the changes that are happening for you right now.
On April 18, Mars enters your sign until June 17, and this is huge for you. You began the year with Mars retrograde in your sign, so you are getting the opportunity now, to rewrite some of the things that weren’t working for you at the beginning of the year. You are overcoming previous obstacles, and experiencing a breakthrough in your life this month. Before April ends, there is a New Moon in Taurus, highlighting your career, reputation, and professional life. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for what goals you want to come to fruition for you now.
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVIRGO
This month is all about building new foundations in your life, Virgo. You are feeling more supported and in tune with your own inner needs and interests, and it’s bringing you closer to people and systems that resonate. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct this month on April 7 after being retrograde for the past few weeks; bringing more clarity, understanding, and compassion to your partnerships in life. You are focused on love this month and are working together with others to make your dreams come true.
Mid-month, Mars moves into your 12th house of closure and endings, and there is a journey of healing that you experience until June 17. You are motivated to understand yourself better and are looking at the past more right now in order to do so. This is a month of recovering and healing from what has been, for new foundations to be built upon. The New Moon on April 27 is a beautiful way to end the month, as you are getting glimpses of a new, abundant, adventure that is ahead of you.
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLIBRA
This is a big month of closure for you, Libra. The Sun is in your 7th house of love for most of April, and your heart is in the right place. With Venus, your ruling planet, going direct on April 12 after being retrograde since March 1, you are finally able to take a breath. You are not experiencing as many obstacles when it comes to communication matters and you are feeling like you have the tools you need to move forward right now.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on April 12, and you are ready to let go of what isn’t working for you. You have been through a lot recently and have gained the clarity you need to let go of old attachments. Venus moves into your house of love before the month ends, and you are leaving the month feeling more in tune with where things are moving forward for you, rather than what you are leaving behind. Your heart moves through a journey in April, and your emotions are showing you a lot.
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleSCORPIO
April is a month of success, progress, and dreams coming to fruition, Scorpio. You are focused on your health, your priorities, and creating space for the new beginnings that you are creating in your life right now. The Full Moon mid-month is a big closure moment for you, and you are owning the fact that you have healed and you are no longer the same person you were in the past. This is a month of stepping into your power and feeling supported in doing so.
Mid-month, Mars enters your 10th house of career and public life and you are shining within your purpose. Over the next month and a half, you are going to be gaining some new opportunities that will be serving your professional life and goals. This is the month to show up and to let your skills, talents, and authenticity shine. On April 17, there is a New Moon in your opposite sign, Taurus, and you are leaving the month with some pleasant surprises in store for you in love as well.
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleSAGITTARIUS
April is a new beginning for you, Sagittarius. You are focused on putting the action and effort behind your goals, and you are being proactive within the opportunities that you are looking for right now. With a Full Moon in your 11th house of aspirations mid-month, you are letting go of the way you thought things would play out for you and are owning a more abundant version of things.
On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus, which will be highlighting your health and what your body needs more of right now. This is a New Moon to set your intentions for your everyday life and to create a new, beneficial routine that will make things easier for you at the end of the day. Before the month ends, Venus enters your 9th house of adventure, and you are leaving the month with your sights set high. Travel plans are likely, and this is a good time to create some new plans for yourself.
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleCAPRICORN
April is about putting one step in front of the other with patience and dedication and trusting the decisions you are making for yourself right now, Capricorn. The Sun is in your 4th house for most of the month, and you are yearning for your safe spaces, comfort foods, and loyal people. Giving yourself more time to decompress, take care of yourself, and ground your energy is essential this month.
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AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleAQUARIUS
April is about giving yourself time to process, accept, and gain a new perspective, Aquarius. You are being guided towards friendship, connection, and community, and are understanding what may be creating the discord in your life that has been distancing you from that. The Full Moon this month is happening in Libra on April 12, and you are ready to let go of feeling like you have to do it all at once or all alone. This month is a reminder to take your time with all the experiences you want to have, trusting that they will come to fruition for you.
Mars enters your house of love and partnership on April 18, and you enter a passionate and steamy time. Romance is in the air for you as you move through the month, and you are spending more of your time with those who you want to move forward with. Venus also moves into a relationship area of your chart before April ends, and you are surrounded by love and community. Overall, this month is showing you that you are not alone and you don’t have to go through the heavy stuff alone either.
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecolePISCES
This is a month where your heart is shining, and you are feeling in tune with the progress you have made in your life and within your relationships, Pisces. You are owning your value, your worth, and the beauty of who you are, and are ready to leave the past behind. With Mercury and Venus both going direct in Pisces this month after being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you are in a better space than you have been, and there are fewer obstacles and miscommunications in your life.
You have been through a journey of understanding yourself better through your goals, perspectives, and interests, and have been committing yourself to your authenticity. On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus happening, and this New Moon is a good time for communication matters, getting your message across, and for your creative pursuits. With the clarity you feel within your mind and heart right now, you are making a lot of progress in April and feeling pleased with where life is headed.
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