While doing my usual internet reading and researching, I happened upon two articles on the topic of oral sex; two that clearly aren't on the same page. One was entitled "Oral Sex Is Not The Measure Of A Partner". It opened up talking about when DJ Khaled stated that (sigh) he didn't go down and how, in spite of that being the shock (and disgust) that was heard around the world, no one should've cared but his wife. Not only that but oral sex should never be the be all or end all of a relationship. Eh. There's a lot to get into today so I won't expound too much. What I will say is I personally think that a lot of us rolled our eyes because he expected to receive what he was not willing to give; that it wasn't a mutual understanding. Sir Khaled shared a huge double standard and, in the process, he also came off pretty selfish and high schoolish about cunnilingus. Actually…younger than that because I used to mentor teens and chile, these teens out here…never mind.
Then I read another article that was more up my alley. "Why You Should Never Settle For A Relationship Without Oral Sex". Yeah, I'm totally with that. Not to say that I don't know some people who hate to give and/or receive oral sex. If that's you and your partner is cool with that, feel free to skip over this or forward it along to someone else. But if you're someone who is like, "Oral sex is a total non-negotiable in my relationship", so much in fact that, from where you sit, the more you can learn about it, the better, this is your lucky day.
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While I personally think that a willing and curious spirit is half of the battle when it comes to keeping your partner happy and satisfied in the oral sex arena, as with all things sexual, there are things that can be done to take things to another level. If you're ready to do that—or to teach your partner how—I've got some tips that will make you smile and would definitely make Khaled blush a few times over.
1. Do Some Reading on the Topic. From Black Women.
Black women are naturally sexy. That is a full and complete sentence. That's why, if you're a little apprehensive or self-conscious when it comes to discussing oral sex with your girls (because they tend to have some good tips), I recommend looking up some articles and podcasts from sistahs who are totally liberated when it comes to the topic.
Two that come to mind are the article "'HELLA BLOWS': AN ESSAY ABOUT SUCKING D*** – WE MUST STOP SHAMING BLACK WOMEN ABOUT ORAL SEX" (yep, it's printed in all caps) and the podcast "Listen: Eating that ass like groceries- Chatting about dining below the belt with Black Women Be Like and Guest" (love the African accents on this one). These are absolutely NSFW, but if you give them a shot, you might discover that it can be oddly comforting to hear Black women be so forthcoming. Also, it could possibly be what helps to pull you out of your shell or to try new things. Or, if you're already super-adventurous, it can give you something to think and/or laugh about. Because there's nothing like learning about or listening to sex from women who are a lot like you. Well, us.
2. Share Some Oral Fantasies
Personally, I think that one of the biggest misconceptions about oral sex is there is only one way to do it and everyone likes it just that way.
That said, if you're someone who is shy, disinterested or even bored when it comes to how your past oral sex encounters have been, spice things up by sharing some of your fantasies with your partner.
I'm not talking about barking orders five minutes before you attempt another round of head. I mean something along the lines of getting a journal that is completely devoted to nothing but oral sex—both ways—where you both can share your innermost thoughts, desires and curiosities. Just reading the entries alone can stir things up enough to make you want to make some of those dreams come true.
3. Invest in an Oral Sex Pillow
Sometimes oral sex feels more like a chore than anything else and it's all due to one thing—neck placement. No matter how awesome the act itself may be, it's hard to enjoy anything when it's causing some discomfort, am I right? A remedy for that is to pick up an oral sex pillow. Some that get rave reviews include the Liberator Wedge Intimate Sex Positioning Pillow, the Liberator Jaz Original Wedge Pillow and the Evercharm Half Moon Pillow Adult Toy.
4. Experiment with Various “Oral Sex Positions”
When it comes to sex positions, most of us think about them in the context of intercourse. But did you know that there are some that will take oral sex to new heights, depths and climaxes? This is one of those instances where I can show you better than I can tell you, so if you'd like to get a few ideas, click here to look at literally dozens of different oral-sex-specific poses.
5. DIY a Flavored Lubricant
Whether or not you decide to use a condom or a dental dam during oral sex (because you can get STDs from fellatio and cunnilingus; don't get it twisted), it can be fun to bring some lubricant into the mix. Just make sure that it has a flavor to it that you actually like. Because a lot of brands contain all kinds of chemicals, my suggestion would be to make some of your own.
A cool recipe that I found has coconut oil and margarita flavoring in it. Another thing that you can do is purchase some cinnamon essential oil (it's naturally sweet and packs a bit of heat). However, since both of these are oil-based and oil and latex don't mix, substituting the oil with 100 percent Aloe Vera is an alternative worth considering.
6. Chew Some Mint Gum. First.
As far as fellatio goes, for all parties involved, the more saliva (or lubrication) that's involved, the better. One way to get your juices flowing is to chew a piece of gum. The reason why I recommend one that comes in a mint flavor is it can "dull" the taste of pre-ejaculate (if that freaks you out). Plus, a minty sensation can be a pleasant cooling sensation experience for your partner.
7. Find an Atypical Location
Location, location, location. That's what they say, right? Well, another way to take oral sex to another level is by getting out of the bedroom. Oh, and totally incorporating the element of surprise. Get into the shower while your partner is washing up and getting ready for work. One or both of you kneel on the side of the couch in between favorite television programs. If you've got a garage, park your car into it and get on the hood of your vehicle. If you've got some sushi, hop on your kitchen counter to partake in a little bit of Nyotaimori (I'll let you look that one up). Get on your dryer while it's running. Find an abandoned building (at night) and go ham.
When it comes to making oral sex an unforgettable experience, creating the right ambiance will earn you some major, major points. Each and every time you intentionally decide to go beyond the borders of your bedroom.
8. Bring Some Condiments In
An ex of mine used to say that if you need to add a condiment to your meal, someone didn't cook it right. Along these same lines, while I do believe that an oral sex connoisseur shouldn't have to depend on things like honey, chocolate or maple syrup, whipped cream or ice cream in order to keep their partner climbing the walls, if you want to switch things up, bringing these into the mix certainly can't hurt.
Just make sure to use them on the genitalia and not in you as much as possible. The reason why I say that is because while the odds are low, there have been instances of women developing maggots in their vagina. Even if something that extreme doesn't happen, placing food into your vaginal canal can definitely throw off your va-jay-jay's pH balance and lead to a vaginal infection. Just something to keep in mind.
9. Keep Your Lingerie on Longer
Not too long ago, I interviewed some married couples about what they enjoy most about their sex life. Some of them raved for several minutes (good for them!), so I had to edit their responses. On the topic of oral sex, something that a husband and wife told me is there is something about a woman keeping her panties on while she's, how did Kelly Rowland put it…getting "kisses down low", that makes cunnilingus really hot. The husband's exact words were, "The tease is as fun as the actual act. If there is a foreplay to oral sex, it's leaving a pair of sexy panties on longer."
Hey, they are a decade in, so I'll totally take his word for it.
10. Talk. Listen. Rinse. Repeat.
A few months ago, Elite Daily published a piece on why dirty talk is a fave among so many people (me included). One of the things that the article mentioned is it's a proven way to destress. But even if it's not something that you and/or yours are particularly big on, never assume that either of you can read one another's mind, even in the bedroom (or wherever y'all choose to get down).
Sex, when done right, is one of the best forms of communication that there is. So, if there's something that you want more or less of, tell your partner that. Encourage him to do the same. A lot of the people I know who could take or leave oral sex have also shared that they don't want to tell their partner why. How are they supposed to please you if you don't tell them how? (That's not a rhetorical question, by the way.)
11. Stop Treating Oral Like Mere Foreplay
Personally, I think that one of the BIGGEST—yep, I'm that serious about it—mistakes that couples make is treating oral sex like its foreplay (an appetizer) rather than "real sex" (a full meal). Now when I say that, I'm not saying that you shouldn't expect more if you want more. What I am saying is that when things are done well and right, it can definitely scratch the right itch, if you know what I mean.
That said, rather than hurrying through it so that you can get on to the next part, take clocks out of the room, put on your favorite slow jams and make it a point and purpose to just be in the moment. However long that moment lasts. Whether intercourse follows…or…not.
12. Buy an Ora 2
If you want a little bit of an extra sensation, something that a lot of women are super fond of is the Ora 2 oral sex stimulator. It fits comfortably in your hand, changes intensity based on the pressure that's applied, and it's specifically designed with your clitoris in mind.
13. Don’t Get Lazy. Don’t Be Redundant Either.
Lazy head. My male friends have talked to me about it, on more than one occasion. From what they've described, it's about as bad as teeth getting in the way (which is pretty bad). Without getting too graphic, they say it's lazy when a woman thinks she's "doing something" just because a man's penis is in her mouth. Predictable head. That is what some women have told me is their oral sex pet peeve. The same kind, the same way, every time.
We're all grown here, so no one should feel as if they should get major points just for agreeing to fellatio or cunnilingus in the first place. If your intention is not to bring your "A" game (that includes enthusiasm and creativity), every time, really…why do it?
15. Praise the Performance
Mark Twain once said, "I can live for two months on a good compliment." Yep. I can't remember exactly where I read it, but I did peep a piece that said that praise is important because, not only does it boost our self-esteem, it also motivates us and gives us more energy to complete whatever tasks we're involved in.
Not to say that oral sex is a chore or anything (far from it), but just imagine how much more you can get out of your partner if you tell him how bomb the experience was rather than simply yawning, rolling over and falling asleep?
BONUS: Select the Right Condom
If you'd prefer to use a condom, one way to not make the experience to where the rubber is the focal point is to get the kind that will enhance everything. I really dig that Men's Health did an entire feature entitled "These Are the Best Condoms and Lubes to Use for Oral Sex, According to a Sex Educator", so if you need some condom referrals, I recommend starting there.
Life is short. Oral sex is good. Get some and then make it better—every time. Hopefully these tips will help you and yours to do just that.
Want more stories like this? Sign up for our newsletter here and check out the related reads below:
Who Knew Oral Sex Has An Official Time Limit?
Jill Scott Is Proof That Oral Sex Can Be Empowering
6 Oral Sex Positions That'll Elevate You Even When You're On Your Knees
Feature image by Shutterstock
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- What If You Hate Oral Sex? - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
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RELATED
At the beginning of the year, we are being shown how significant 2025 will be for love. From March 1, 2025, until April 12, 2025, Venus, the planet of love and relationships, will be retrograde. Venus goes retrograde approximately every 18 months and hasn’t been retrograde since the Summer of 2023. With love taking a step back at the beginning of the year, we move through a time of understanding the emotional world better and letting go of trying to control outcomes here.
What Does 2025 Have in Store for Love?
It’s time to refocus your relationship priorities overall, and with this retrograde happening in both Aries and Pisces, Aries being the first sign of the zodiac and Pisces being the last; there is a chapter we are closing and a new one we are walking into.
Another significant factor that is influencing relationships this year, is Jupiter’s entry into Cancer. Jupiter brings blessings, abundance, luck, and expansion, and in water sign Cancer, brings these gifts to your emotions. Cancer rules emotional safety, foundations, close loved ones, family, support, and emotional well-being, and with Jupiter in this sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, we experience blessings in stability within love. This is a good year for building stronger foundations in love, aligning with those who are loyal and supportive, knowing what you need emotionally, and being a lot clearer on it.
Letting Go of the Past: The Astrological Theme of 2025
Overall, the guideline for the year when it comes to love is to focus on the bigger picture and let things work themselves out without forcing them to. Magic will come in for you this year when you can assess your needs and wants, let go of illusions or smoke and mirrors, and focus on the things you want for yourself rather than what you don’t. Your focus and beliefs on love are the priority right now, and things will be coming full circle for the better.
Read below to see your personal 2025 love forecast. Read for your sun, moon, and rising signs.
ARIES
2025 is one of the more significant years for you, Aries. A lot of the major transits are happening in your sign, which includes Venus retrograde in Aries at the beginning of the year, Neptune in Aries from March 2025 until 2039, and Saturn in Aries from May 2025 until 2028. Not to mention, Chiron, the wounded healer is currently in your sign until 2027.
What this means for you when it comes to love, is that you have learned a lot about where you want to be here, and it’s the year to implement more of these tools and knowledge of the heart.
This year for love is about honoring your integrity and what you need personally to thrive in life and creating that space to let it in. You need someone who will be there for you through whatever you are experiencing in life and not someone who adds to these challenges. This year is a time of rising above, and choosing better for yourself.
TAURUS
2025 for you when it comes to love, is all about perspective and taking better care of your heart, Taurus. Uranus, the planet of change, rebellion, progress, and upheaval, has been in your sign since 2019, and this year you get a break from all of the surprises. From Jul. 7, 2025, until Nov. 7, 2025, Uranus leaves your sign and enters Gemini, giving your mind and your heart some time to breathe.
This year you are being given the opportunity to see things for what they are, rather than what you fear them to be. You are able to see your relationship dynamics clearer, allowing you to feel more confident in what you are building and creating for yourself in this area of your life. What you are working on this year is letting go of overthinking, and allowing things to play out the way they are meant to in love.
GEMINI
This year you are feeling in balance when it comes to love, Gemini. Relationships are important to you in life overall, as you are a relationship-oriented sign, but it can be difficult at times to keep the balance and perspective here. This year, with lucky Jupiter in your sign until June, you have the opportunity to be blessed with some fortunate circumstances personally and within romance.
You are feeling yourself this year, and this is attracting you success and new opportunities within love.
Uranus will also be in your sign this year from Jul. 7 until Nov. 7, and some surprises are in store for you. Pay attention to what happens in your love life during this period, as similar themes will be coming back around for you when Uranus officially enters its Gemini transit from 2026 - 2032. Overall, this year is about balancing what’s coming and going in love, and finding your peace within your inner confidence for it all.
CANCER
2025 for you, Cancer, is about stability in love. You are growing emotionally from the ground up, and are feeling a sense of support, confidence, romance, and receptivity in your love life this year. You are one of the lucky signs of 2025, and this is due to Jupiter, the planet of blessings, entering your sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026. While Jupiter is in your sign, your life expands and you are able to see the gifts of your world that may have been harder to come by previously.
This is a year of spending more time with your loved ones and feeling more heard and supported emotionally. Safety and security are especially important to you this year, and you are only entertaining the people who feel that way about you and provide that. Many Cancers will be expanding their families this year or developing a long-term relationship, and overall this is a year of feeling stronger when it comes to love.
LEO
When it comes to love this year for you, Leo, it’s about trusting your intuition and listening more to what your heart is telling you. There are not many major transits happening in Leo in 2025, which means there is a lot of room to grow, but you may be feeling a lack of support or encouragement to do so. A lot of Leos are taking a step back to look at where they are currently in love, and yearning for some change and a new direction here.
Neptune will be in your 9th house of adventure for most of this year, and you are being asked to get inspired and do things differently, but don’t take unnecessary risks in love that may not serve you in the long run.
It can be easy to get lost in the fantasy of love rather than the actual reality you’ll live in here, and taking more time to understand yourself, your relationships, and the dynamics in your love life will be necessary. Overall, your heart is healing this year and you are moving away from the past and creating your new future.
VIRGO
This year when it comes to love, you are going through changes that are aligning you closer to your goals and dreams here, Virgo. You are focused on making things work that you want to see bloom, and also letting go of putting effort into people that aren’t reciprocating the same energy. With the North Node entering your sister sign Pisces and the South Node moving into your sign from Jan. 11, 2025, until Jul. 26, 2026, you are doing a lot of letting go over the next year.
However, with the North Node being in your 7th house of love, new doors and gifts are also opening up for you and your partnerships. The more you can let go of perfection and overworking your mind and your heart, the more blessings you will experience when it comes to love this year. In 2025, you also have two Eclipses in your sign, and there are overall a lot of changes Virgos are moving through this year. Your main guidance for love is to stand by the things that serve your heart and release yourself from what burdens it.
LIBRA
Love is coming to fruition for you this year, Libra. You have been through a lot in your personal life these past few years, and walking into 2025, you are ready for some positive change. This is a year of feeling in balance with your personal goals and dreams, and what you are experiencing romantically and financially as well. Relationship dynamics are serving you and your sense of abundance, and many gifts are coming your way in love this year.
With Neptune, Chiron, and Saturn all being in your 7th house of love, your love life and partnerships are the main focus for you in 2025.
You are moving through changes, overcoming previous obstacles, and bringing back the dreamy energy here. With Chiron in the 7th, you are still doing some healing of the heart, but with Neptune now entering, it all feels a little more romantic and spiritual at the same time. This year is about believing in the impossible in love, taking care of yourself, and allowing someone else to take care of you as well.
SCORPIO
This year is all about opportunity when it comes to love, Scorpio. You have your eyes on the prize and are focused on what you want for yourself, but also how you want to show up for love as well. You have goals and intentions that you are setting for your love life this year, and a lot of them reflect the passion and strength you are feeling as you enter the year. Vesta is in your sign this year until September, and you have a spark within you that is a magnet for success and love. You are walking forward confidently and are feeling inspired, sexy, and magical this year.
This is a very sensual and powerful year for you, and this energy is being reflected in the relationship experiences you are having. Jupiter also enters your 9th house of adventure halfway through the year, and there is something special about the trips you are taking and the risks you are taking in love. Overall, this is a year of doing things your way and attracting love to you through your inner confidence and charisma.
SAGITTARIUS
This is a beautiful year of feeling balanced and abundant in love, Sagittarius. There is a lot of energy coming in and you are giving a lot of love as well. This sense of synergy you are feeling within your love life this year has a lot to do with Juno, the asteroid of soulmates, in your sign from Feb. 19 - Apr. 15. Your people are coming in and you have options this year, Sag.
This is a year of feeling loved for the inspiring, outgoing, and unique being you are, and meeting more people who match your energy.
Saturn also enters your 5th house of romance this year, and you are learning a lot through your experiences with others. You are learning how to be more confident in who you are and what you want for yourself and also recognizing the importance of making more time for fun and playful experiences. This is the year to see love as a more light-hearted experience and to not take yourself too seriously.
CAPRICORN
You are letting things come to you when it comes to love this year, Capricorn. You are feeling beautiful, capable, and worthy, and you are receiving the gifts that come from this sense of confidence and patience. This past year, you were setting a lot of new goals for yourself and your relationships, and in 2025, you are experiencing the results of these efforts.
Jupiter moves into your sister sign Cancer from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, and enters your 7th house of love, partnerships, romance, marriage, and harmony. Your love life and experience of it all are expanding this year, and benevolent Jupiter is sending blessings to this area of your life. This is a year of things coming full circle for you in love, and you feel less confused about it all and more sure of yourself and what is becoming for you here.
AQUARIUS
Love is a highlight for you this year, Aquarius. You are coming together with another, and many Aquarius’ will be forming new relationships or growing within a strong relationship. You are experiencing the fruition of your dreams in love, and are also able to heal and let go of past emotional experiences that have been overwhelming for you in the past.
The North Node enters your 12th house of closure this year, and you are motivated towards change, cleaning house, and releasing the cobwebs of the past.
You are walking into new emotional experiences with less baggage and self-doubt, and are experiencing a fresh start in love. This is a year of asking for what you need emotionally and receiving it. Love is coming in for you in harmonious and magical ways, and you are rewriting your story in love in 2025.
PISCES
You are moving through a lot of changes when it comes to love in 2025, Pisces. This is a year of closure, healing, and giving yourself a fresh start, and the way you enter the year will be a lot different than the way you end it. The North Node of Destiny enters your sign this year, and the South Node of Karma enters your 7th house of love. So, a lot of your focus this year is on your personal goals and path, and there may be some neglect or lack of focus on your relationships.
This can create some discord with those close to you, and your guidance for this year is to try to balance the personal successes and wins you are experiencing, with the love changes that also need your attention right now. Know that what leaves your life this year is being replaced by something better, and also know that your healing doesn’t need to have a timeline and you can take as much time as you need to grow. Overall, you are turning a new page in love in 2025.
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Featured image by Anchiy/Getty Images
2025 Dating Trends
And since this is the time of year when what seems like a ton of dating trends are being introduced into the atmosphere, I wanted to share two, in particular, that first caught my eye and then caused me to roll them. Here’s hoping that after you make the time to read this all the way through that you’ll get why they caused me to react the way that I did. And you know what? Here’s hoping even more that you’ll be cautious about falling for the first and/or merely settling for the second (here’s hoping, for real).
What’s Throning All About?
GiphyLet’s begin with throning. From what I’ve read and researched, this is a dating trend that Gen Z is taking to a whole ‘nother level. However, once you hear what it’s all about, I think you’ll get that this has pretty much been going on for as long as social media has been all the rage.
I say that because throning is basically seeking someone whose social media status is so impressive (at least to the individual) that they find themselves wanting to be connected to the person in order to improve how they are perceived online.
If you read various articles on throning, you’ll get that I find it to be shallow as hell because 1) many authors of the pieces say that it’s more about boosting one’s ego and 2) ignoring the actual qualities of an individual, so long as they appear to be on-point on Instagram (for example). In other words, throning is all about striving to obtain social validation in order to create some sense of elevated relevance.
In fact, as one article on the topic specifically stated, “…throning prioritizes influence and clout over shared interests and values, meaningful connection, and emotional intimacy”. Hmm-hmm. So, throning has nothing to do about cultivating something real with another individual; it’s mostly about finding who can make someone appear the way that they would like to online.
Aside from how, again, super shallow that sounds, if folks were willing to dive deeper, they’d get that throning is also counterproductive as all get out when you stop to consider the fact that, reportedly, 40 percent of individuals lie (or highly exaggerate) about the things that they present online and, as far as dating apps go, a whopping 81 percent of people misrepresent themselves on there. Hmph, not to mention the fact that it’s also been cited that most individuals lie to themselves as much as 200 times a day just to present some sort of (false) self-image.
If you also add to this the fact that the word “throning” also sounds a helluva lot like “pedestaling” — why would you want to seek out someone with a reputation that isn’t even real only to put them on some sort of “throne” in your mind, so that hopefully, people will elevate you in the same manner?
Absolutely nothing about that sounds good, healthy, or right. You’re basically saying, “Let me find someone who misrepresents who they are and connect myself to that, so that I can create a false narrative in hopes that it will make me more popular and, in turn, make me feel better about myself.”
Do you see a thriving relationship (including with yourself) coming out of that? Yeah, me neither. SMDH.
Why Are Nanoships So Popular These Days?
GiphyAnd then there’s nanoships (which some people spell this way: nano-ships). What are those? Well, on the surface, nanoships seem like they’re alright — that is, until you put a bit more thought into ‘em. Probably the easiest way to break down a nanoship is it’s like experiencing those moments you see on rom-coms when two people look at each other on a train or in a restaurant, some super dramatic music plays, you think something significant between the two of them is about to happen and then — BOOM! For whatever the reason, the moment is gone.
As crazy as that might sound, read virtually any article on nanoships, and it’s going to say something along the lines of it being about finding joy in fleeting moments with a person (one article calls it “micro-connections”) rather than desiring much else (at least with them). For instance, if a guy winks at you at your favorite coffee shop, that would be called a nanoship. Or if you go to a friend’s wedding and find yourself dancing the night away with someone tall, dark, and handsome, only to never exchange contact information — who cares? At least you have that memory, right?
Even if there is no chance of it evolving into a relationship — or hell, even situationship — you can at least say that you had a nanoship.
Lawd. Please tell me that you can see the flaw in this way of thinking. Again, while on the surface, it seems that a nanoship is teaching you how to be in the moment and find contentment with the simple things in life (which, yes, is good), let’s please go deeper. If something that transpires is so significant that it is able to create a “spark” of some sort, why didn’t it go any further? I mean, from what I’ve read, a nanoship isn’t about, say, a married person making eye contact with someone in a store and thinking, “If I were single, I would definitely get their number.”
No, a nanoship seems to be about two individuals who are actually available to take a little spark and turn it into a potential firework, and yet, they just…don’t.
Now, what one person who was interviewed on the topic said is nanoships can be a helpful thing because they can inspire hope — hope that if you’re tempted to become cynical about finding love or “the one,” those micro-connections can let you know that a relationship, somewhere out in the universe, is possible. Okay, but it’s not like you saw a fine man at a red light, and the light turned green before either of you could say anything.
Nanoships actually last long enough for something more to potentially happen — and so, if they don’t, one or both people don’t want it to. And why in the world does that deserve to be called much of anything, let alone a true dating trend?
I mean, just imagine folks out here being asked about the last time that they were in a relationship and them saying, “I can’t even recall. Oh, but I’ve been in a ton of nanoships lately.” Is it just me, or is that almost like saying that a one-night stand is a lasting emotional connection? To me, a nanoship isn’t a “ship” at all. And, on some levels, it can encourage delusional thinking because you can either find yourself making something more than what it actually is/was or romanticizing your way out of the reality that if something was so special, someone would’ve done something more about the moment — because that’s just how awesome the moment was.
Be Careful with These Dating Trends, Sis
GiphyAnd why did I find it so necessary to share these two trends? Well, because again of what a trend actually is: something that has the potential to heavily influence you. And since December and January are probably the times when new dating trends are discussed the most, I didn’t want you to think (even if it’s subconsciously) that just because something is popular that it’s right.
And when it comes to the two trends that I just mentioned, no one needs to put you on a throne, and you don’t need to settle for “a movie scene exchange” with someone who couldn’t — which is more like wouldn’t — put more effort in and simply…didn’t (which reminds me, click here to read about a similar dating trend known as “smutten”).
That said, is there a current dating trend that I actually can get behind? Well, apparently, stability is going to be brought into the chat more in 2025. Meaning that women are going to prioritize character traits like reliability and potential partners who have goals, budgets, and ambitions. To that, I will simply say, “Awesome” and then follow that up with, “Make sure that you are what you require.” Someone who wants stability should be intentional about being stable themselves, amen?
Other than that, though, please be careful out here — in some ways, now more than ever, because you know how some of y’all say that the dating pool has pee in it? Uh-huh, well, many of these dating trends do too.
Again, just because it’s popular, that doesn’t make it the best fit for you.
When it comes to dating, know the trends (for self-awareness’s sake), yet don’t blindly follow them.
You deserve better. No wiggle room on that. Ever.
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