Almost 24 years ago, a six-year-old girl learned that her mother had been tragically murdered by her father (a well-renowned pastor at a local church). Soon after, their father would be sentenced to 28 years in prison, she along with her four sisters would be taken from their home and thrown into foster care, and her life would never be the same.
Later, that little girl would go on to earn a degree and become an accountant, only to be fired from her job and ultimately create one of the most popular platforms in the media world, amassing millions of followers and subsequently securing a serious bag.
We now know the woman in this story to be the creator of The Shade Room, Angelica Nwandu, a boss who now knows that every roadblock in her life has been a blessing in disguise.
Angelica Nwandu
The media mogul and star of the latest episode of UMC's Behind Her Faith(available to stream April 9), a faith based-series executive produced by Insecure's Jay Ellis that features stars like Niecy Nash, Aisha Hinds, and Essence Atkins, recently sat down with xoNecole for an intimate one-on-one conversation about the secret behind her success, and according to Angie, it was nothing but God's love. She explained, "When I was wrong, when I was right, when I was indifferent––He was there throughout it."
On the show, Angie opens up about how her mother's death changed her life, getting to know Jesus midway through her entrepreneurial journey, and how she learned to adjust when she felt like her vision and her values didn't align. We got a chance to catch up with Angie to talk more about her faith, facing her fears, and how to find purpose in your pain and, honey, it was a whole word.
Fear Is Poisonous
Angelica Nwandu
Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will, and Angelica explained that this was a lesson she learned firsthand.
While you may think you're in the self-doubt struggle alone, our good sis revealed that she can totally relate. The Nigerian-American creative told xoNecole, "I'm going to tell you right now, I've experienced it all. I've experienced doubt, thinking, 'Oh, you know what, who was I kidding? God didn't say this is going to happen for me. I'm not up for this. I can't do this, I don't have the work ethic. I don't have the intelligence––the creativity.'"
"[Fear is the] biggest opponent that I have," she continued. "Because fear, for me, and its impact on me is crippling. It makes it so that I don't do anything. Either I don't do anything or I consider things failures before they've even started."
Angelica explained that while analysis paralysis can become addictive, it's a cycle that she's learned to break by pulling the weeds before they even have the opportunity to grow. She shared, "I've noticed it, that monster of fear just growing and growing and growing, and I've noticed that it is so poisonous to a lot of areas in my life. Fear doesn't just show up in one area. It kind of seeps into all areas. You'll notice it just creeping in, creeping in and growing and seeping into different types of relationships, coming out in different ways."
"You gotta hit fear with technique. You got to figure out how fear gets you––what triggers you and then start breaking that down. Address the triggers. Triggers are places where you need healing. Why am I so scared of failure? Why? Why am I so scared of being alone? Where are the roots of these feelings coming from?"
Coming face-to-face with your trauma is never easy, but Angelica wants you to know that it's always worth it, sis. And as painful as your past may have been, when it comes to discovering your purpose...
Hindsight Is 20/20
Angelica Nwandu
Unfortunately, life doesn't come with a built-in rearview mirror, but if it did, it would likely reveal that hindsight is 20/20 and Angie wants you to know that many of life's roadblocks are only blessings in disguise. Despite facing legal woes, business breakups, and moments of disappointment, the TSR creator remains adamant that faith will take you places hustling won't.
"When I put out that prayer, 'God take things that you do not want me to have––that you don't have a plan for––that are in my life. Anything that's not supposed to be there, make it fall, make it collapse, just cancel the deal, get it away from me.' And when I have prayed that I've seen so many things fall through."
She continued, "I think I've seen big deals fall through with big companies. I've seen things just canceled, get ripped from under my feet. Right? And in hindsight, I look back and I see why those things were taken and I prayed the same prayer."
Angelica told xoNecole that this is a prayer that she's also prayed over her company, but instead of blocking her business, He has allowed it to thrive, "We get hit with these big things and it's like, how did we survive that? Why are we thriving in this time, how are we getting through this?"
Which led Angelica to drop yet another noteworthy gem…
Your Purpose Is Promised
Angelica Nwandu
In the docu-series, Angelica revealed that although she has come a long way from being that seven-year-old girl whose life was uprooted and transformed forever, she has to remind herself that God has been at her side, pushing her further into her purpose every step of the way.
She told xoNecole, "I really do believe that my belief in God is the only thing that's keeping me. When you think about it, what else can I rely on that won't change? That is always the same? That is true to the word that I know for a fact because of not just the Bible, which I love, but because of my past experiences, I know God is real."
While Angelica says she still experiences moments of doubt and unpromising pitfalls along her path to success, she now knows that the valley is where you gain perspective. "I know he's 100 and I know His promises are true." She explained, "And so because I know he has a promise on my life and I know that He's promising for me, when [bad] things happen, yes. Don't get it wrong. There are times where I'm doubting it. But I have to take it back to, well, God has a promise to me. It hasn't come true yet, [but] it's going to come true. His word is true. He will protect me until the fulfillment of that promise, and then He'll promise more. "
"To me, it's about having faith that things are gonna be OK even when they're not. If I lost everything today, I have to have faith that He'll bring it back together. But, see if I don't believe in Him, then what faith could I have? I could have faith in myself. But life is fragile. I have to believe in something bigger than myself and that's big for me. And I think that's what's getting me through."
To check out Angelica's full episode of Behind Her Faith, tune into UMC Thursday, April 9th or click here!
Featured image courtesy of UMC.
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Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Alistair Berg/Getty ImagesStep 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Getty ImagesStep 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
DMP/ Getty ImagesStep 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
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Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert