
The Matchmaking DUO Shares What Keeps Many Women Single And Tips For Navigating Dating Successfully

One topic of conversation that I find myself in when talking with girlfriends is dating. Questions like, “Why is dating so hard? “Will I ever get married?” “Why am I still single?” usually comes up, and then it turns into a whole venting session with everyone sharing their dating woes. Honestly, it’s tiring. However, I can’t help but wonder why are so many of us in the same boat. After talking to the co-owners of Fisher Gilmore Matchmaking (FGM), the Matchmaking DUO, Kelli K. Fisher, and Tana C. Gilmore, I now understand some of the reasons why many of my good sistas are still single.
But first, let’s get into why Kelli and Tana are qualified to speak on dating and relationships. As two Black women who are in successful marriages, they have experienced the ups and downs that happen in many relationships, and they were able to overcome them. And as self-proclaim “heart hunters,” they are helping many Black singles find love through their matchmaking business.
Both women worked together in corporate but ended up making the transition into matchmaking after finding themselves constantly giving dating and relationship advice to others. Kelli, a dating coach, and Tana, a relationship coach, formed FGM and are now celebrating its 10-year anniversary. Their services included coaching and matchmaking, and they recently launched their Modern Dating Academy, which is a cost-effective membership. They have recruiters who they refer to as “love liaisons” whose mission is to find people and add them to their database for potential matchmaking. But how do you know if matchmaking is for you?
According to Kelli and Tana, there are a few reasons.
“A person should invest in a matchmaker when they have realized that they need some support, they need some help. When you want the home of your dreams, you hire a realtor, when you want something done, you hire a contractor. You hire professionals for every other area in your life,” Tana began. “When you want a specific job, you want a recruiter. We're heart hunters like we stated earlier, so [if] you're looking for something different, you're looking for something specific, why not hire a professional that does this every day, all day? This is what we do and what we do well.
“We're one of the most highly sought-after agencies in the country. So I think it's very important for you to invest in yourself, invest in your life, in your personal life as well. We do it all the time for so many other things, this is just as important, if not more important. This is your legacy. We're helping build your legacy.”
"I think it's very important for you to invest in yourself, invest in your life, in your personal life as well. We do it all the time for so many other things, this is just as important, if not more important. This is your legacy. We're helping build your legacy.”
During our interview, Kelli and Tana dished on the number one reason why many of us seem to be struggling in the dating world and some simple tips to overcome it.
Kelli Fisher (L) and Tana Gilmore (R).
Photo courtesy of Kelli Fisher and Tana GilmoreWhat We Have Been Taught Vs. Reality
Kelli suggested that for many of us, our upbringing has influenced how we approach dating, which isn’t working in our favor. “I would say the biggest problem that I see now is just the difference between what we’ve been raised to do culturally and the times today in dating. So, when you think of culturally, you think of women are supposed to sit back. They’re supposed to not be too forward, they're supposed to, you know, not give too much attention. Let someone court you, that type of thing, but really the wave of dating now is where, you know, everybody can swipe left,” Kelli explained.
“They can swipe right, they can have another date, so if you don’t offer enough of an experience on a date, then you’re gone, or they’re gone, so you know it’s almost like you have to show more than we’re trained to do, so you have to get feedback. You have to have a fun experience. You have to give enough for someone to say, ‘Oooh, let me call this person back because I can’t wait to hear more,’ and that is the discrepancy I think a lot of times in where we are today with dating.”
Unrealistic Expectations
Another reason why many women may be single is because of unrealistic expectations. However, this also stems from what they saw and were taught growing up.
“I also think that their expectations are unrealistic sometimes about what’s out there and what they can command and what they can’t,” said Tana. “So, I think that that’s sometimes a problem when it comes to the matchmakers just having that reality check with them, and I think that we do that well because it comes from a soft space and a place. But we want to make sure and ensure that they know exactly what’s out here, exactly what to do when it’s in front of you, and just kinda help them progress forward because, again, unfortunately, our Black women don’t really have the relationship skill sets because we were never taught them.
“They don’t teach it in school, and it's not taught in the home. You don’t really see it to be a model sometimes, and then when you do, you don’t see the tough times as well, so you don’t know how to deal with conflict resolution or things like that. So, sometimes when that’s all that they've seen growing up, we’re having to start from scratch and really help them create their own love blueprint of what it looks like for them.”
Pro-stock studio/ Getty Images
Believing Success In Career Equates To Success In Relationships
Last but not least, Kelli touched on how families valuing women’s careers over their personal life can have a negative effect on their dating lives. “I think we are raised as Black women to feel like your value in a relationship is tied to your career and your success, and so you know our families celebrate that. ‘Oh, this woman is a doctor.’ ‘This one is a lawyer.’ ‘This one’s an engineer.’ No one’s celebrating, ‘Oh, she got married, and she’s a wonderful wife and mother,’ not as much as the career,” Kelli admitted.
“So, it’s like almost thinking that, 'Okay, well, she is a doctor. She’s gonna be an amazing wife,' and the skills don’t transfer. It's two different skill sets that we have to really build up, one as much as the other, a lot of times.”
Winning Tips To Help You Navigate The Dating World Successfully
While there may be some factors keeping some of us single, you don’t have to stay single for long, if that’s your choice, of course. According to Kelli and Tana, when you walk out of your door, you are “on the market,” so always be ready to meet a potential suitor. Whether that’s the grocery store, Tana suggested going to the grocery store between the hours of 5-8 p.m. because that’s when men get off work or leave the gym, or running a quick errand. The Matchmaking DUO also recommended going to sports bars and sporting events because the men are there.
“It's really about showing interest. There’s nothing wrong with showing interest, and once you show interest, usually he’ll take the lead, but when you think about a man, a lot of times we’re trained don’t even make eyes with them,” Kelli stated.
“What we want him to do, we want him to see us in the grocery store, we’re not even looking up. We want him to come around to where we are, say hello, make us look up, and have a conversation only for us to [say], ‘Oh, no, I’m not interested.’ I mean, that’s a lot of work, so at least if you look up, smile and say hello, that will get the ball rolling more than you think.”
Another tip is just to smile. If you are single and ready to mingle, then it’s important to look approachable. Tana suggested giving yourself a smile challenge where you smile at least 50 times a day. That way, it can become easier to smile at someone who catches your eye.
“It's really about showing interest. There’s nothing wrong with showing interest, and once you show interest, usually he’ll take the lead, but when you think about a man, a lot of times we’re trained don’t even make eyes with them."
How To Talk To Your Crush
Okay, so you got your crush’s attention, what do you say? According to Tana, it’s simple, compliment them. “Who's going to turn a compliment away? You can find something to compliment him on– his shoes, his watch, men love technology,” Tana noted. “They usually have a nice watch, they usually have nice socks, a lot of them. Or a nice smile, or they smell good.
“Give them a compliment. No one’s going to turn down a compliment. Lead with a compliment and at least an introduction and your name. If nothing else, you could at least give him a soft introduction of who you are. Just let the conversation take its course.”
For more information about the Matchmaking DUO, check out their website thematchmakingduo.com, and follow them on all social media platforms @thematchmakingduo.
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London Alexaundria is the contributing editor for xoNecole. She is an alum of Clark Atlanta University, where she majored in Mass Media Arts and has worked in journalism for over ten years. You can follow her on Instagram and TikTok @theselfcarewriter
Your April 2025 Horoscopes Are All About Softening Into Love & Speaking Your Truth
April is a month to slow down and to fully grasp what has been. The month starts in fiery Aries Season, but we are also in the thick of Retrograde Season as we begin the month as well. Thankfully, Mercury finally goes direct on April 7, after being retrograde mid-March, and communication matters are clearing up. This is a month of mental clarity, a fresh start, and not being afraid to dream a little bigger.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, and this Full Moon brings relationship and financial matters full circle. This is the time to let go of what doesn’t make you feel balanced or in harmony and to create space for more peace to enter your life. Venus goes direct in Pisces on the same day, after being retrograde since March 1, and love is healing. With Venus now direct, there are more opportunities for commitment and longevity in love, and there is overall a greater feeling of romance, receptivity, and compassion in the air now.
Mercury enters Aries from April 16 until May 10, and what you were trying to see through or understand better while Mercury was retrograde here last month, you are experiencing a breakthrough now. Mercury in Aries is insightful and courageous, and people are more likely to speak their minds and initiate conversation with this energy. Mars then enters Leo from April 18 until June 17, reminding us that sometimes it’s okay to be a little more selfish and to focus on what you need right now. Mars in Leo brings forth confidence, creativity, and passion, and brings an exciting energy to charge of your life and advocate for yourself.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, bringing some earth sign energy into the mix, grounding and nurturing what you are creating in your life right now. On April 27, we have a New Moon in Taurus, and this is an abundant and fruitful New Moon. This is one of the best New Moons of the year for you to set your intentions for your financial world and a time for seeing new opportunities for abundance. On the last day of the month, Venus moves into Aries until June 6th, and love requires a little more passion, independence, and excitement during this time.
Overall, April is a month of feeling things through, taking more intuitive risks, investing in yourself, and balancing your needs with the needs of your relationships.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what April has in store for you.
ARIES
April is your month to shine, Aries. With the chaos of March now over, you are starting to see the progress of where life is and how everything has turned out even better than you were expecting. The month begins with the Sun in your 1st house of self, and you are feeling more confident, courageous, and in tune with yourself. With a Full Moon in your sister sign on April 12, relationships are also coming full circle for you now, and you are claiming your peace this month.
Mercury finally goes direct on April 7 and then enters your sign from April 16 to May 10, and this is going to clear up any miscommunications that you have been through. With Mercury now in your sign, your conversations are lively, your mind is inspiring, and you are thinking one step ahead. Before the month ends, Venus enters your sign from April 30 to June 6, and love is also moving forward for you now. Overall, this is a month where you are experiencing some happy outcomes and loyal support.
TAURUS
April is a month of passion and purpose, Taurus. You are living in your abundance, and are focused on valuing yourself and the things you are bringing to fruition right now. Venus, your ruling planet, goes direct on March 12 after being retrograde in your financial house since March 1, and you are moving into the month experiencing more opportunities and also feeling more respected in what you are accumulating for yourself and standing your ground on.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, and it’s all about you right now. This Taurus Season is smoothing things out for you in love, with new relationship developments unfolding and life flourishing for you. The New Moon this month is in your sign on April 27, it’s time for a new beginning. You are truly embracing your strength in April, making things happen for yourself, and no longer doubting your future and what is possible for you.
GEMINI
This month is all about the options becoming available to you now, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month on April 7, you no longer feel as held back or out of place as you may have in the past weeks. With Mercury now direct, your thinking is clearer, and you are seeing the opportunities in your career and professional world that you may have missed before.
The more you can embrace your authenticity, the less time you will spend doubting how others perceive you, remember that this month.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, highlighting the romance in your life and bringing forth understanding and compassion within your close relationships. You are letting go of old attachments or self-doubts that haven’t been serving your love life, and are growing closer to your own heart in the process. Before April comes to an end, Mars enters your 3rd house of communication, and you are overall leaving the month focused on your progress, your vision, and taking up space because you deserve to.
CANCER
This month is all about balancing your time and energy wisely, Cancer. You are being reminded not to overwork or overwhelm yourself in April, and to focus on doing the things that are within your control right now. The Sun is in your 10th house of career for most of the month so you are feeling really passionate about the things you are developing in your life right now, but it’s all about finding the right balance between your personal goals and your needs in your relationships as well.
The Full Moon in Libra on April 12 will be a time to devote your energy to self-care, close loved ones, and overall getting some time to decompress. You are ready to let go of the things that don’t make you feel safe or nurtured and are receiving an emotional renewal right now. The New Moon in Taurus at the end of the month is a time to focus on your intentions on your community, friendships, and aspirations in life, and to pay attention to where you can create more abundance here.
LEO
Things are turning around for you for the better, Leo. April is a dynamic month, and you are owning your inner alchemist. With a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication on April 12, you are getting the messages you have been looking for and the mental clarity you have found is bringing closure to some of your close relationships. This month is about being flexible and trusting the changes that are happening for you right now.
On April 18, Mars enters your sign until June 17, and this is huge for you. You began the year with Mars retrograde in your sign, so you are getting the opportunity now, to rewrite some of the things that weren’t working for you at the beginning of the year. You are overcoming previous obstacles, and experiencing a breakthrough in your life this month. Before April ends, there is a New Moon in Taurus, highlighting your career, reputation, and professional life. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for what goals you want to come to fruition for you now.
VIRGO
This month is all about building new foundations in your life, Virgo. You are feeling more supported and in tune with your own inner needs and interests, and it’s bringing you closer to people and systems that resonate. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct this month on April 7 after being retrograde for the past few weeks; bringing more clarity, understanding, and compassion to your partnerships in life. You are focused on love this month and are working together with others to make your dreams come true.
Mid-month, Mars moves into your 12th house of closure and endings, and there is a journey of healing that you experience until June 17. You are motivated to understand yourself better and are looking at the past more right now in order to do so. This is a month of recovering and healing from what has been, for new foundations to be built upon. The New Moon on April 27 is a beautiful way to end the month, as you are getting glimpses of a new, abundant, adventure that is ahead of you.
LIBRA
This is a big month of closure for you, Libra. The Sun is in your 7th house of love for most of April, and your heart is in the right place. With Venus, your ruling planet, going direct on April 12 after being retrograde since March 1, you are finally able to take a breath. You are not experiencing as many obstacles when it comes to communication matters and you are feeling like you have the tools you need to move forward right now.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on April 12, and you are ready to let go of what isn’t working for you. You have been through a lot recently and have gained the clarity you need to let go of old attachments. Venus moves into your house of love before the month ends, and you are leaving the month feeling more in tune with where things are moving forward for you, rather than what you are leaving behind. Your heart moves through a journey in April, and your emotions are showing you a lot.
SCORPIO
April is a month of success, progress, and dreams coming to fruition, Scorpio. You are focused on your health, your priorities, and creating space for the new beginnings that you are creating in your life right now. The Full Moon mid-month is a big closure moment for you, and you are owning the fact that you have healed and you are no longer the same person you were in the past. This is a month of stepping into your power and feeling supported in doing so.
Mid-month, Mars enters your 10th house of career and public life and you are shining within your purpose. Over the next month and a half, you are going to be gaining some new opportunities that will be serving your professional life and goals. This is the month to show up and to let your skills, talents, and authenticity shine. On April 17, there is a New Moon in your opposite sign, Taurus, and you are leaving the month with some pleasant surprises in store for you in love as well.
SAGITTARIUS
April is a new beginning for you, Sagittarius. You are focused on putting the action and effort behind your goals, and you are being proactive within the opportunities that you are looking for right now. With a Full Moon in your 11th house of aspirations mid-month, you are letting go of the way you thought things would play out for you and are owning a more abundant version of things.
On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus, which will be highlighting your health and what your body needs more of right now. This is a New Moon to set your intentions for your everyday life and to create a new, beneficial routine that will make things easier for you at the end of the day. Before the month ends, Venus enters your 9th house of adventure, and you are leaving the month with your sights set high. Travel plans are likely, and this is a good time to create some new plans for yourself.
CAPRICORN
April is about putting one step in front of the other with patience and dedication and trusting the decisions you are making for yourself right now, Capricorn. The Sun is in your 4th house for most of the month, and you are yearning for your safe spaces, comfort foods, and loyal people. Giving yourself more time to decompress, take care of yourself, and ground your energy is essential this month.
Mars enters your 8th house of transformation mid-month and will be fueling your need for some change, excitement, and emotional rejuvenation over the next month and a half. You are entering an impactful moment of the year for you, and you are motivated toward change right now. The New Moon at the end of the month is in a fellow earth sign, highlighting the romantic new beginnings you are entering now. Overall, this month is a process, and you are opening new doors while finding gratitude in what is here for you now.
AQUARIUS
April is about giving yourself time to process, accept, and gain a new perspective, Aquarius. You are being guided towards friendship, connection, and community, and are understanding what may be creating the discord in your life that has been distancing you from that. The Full Moon this month is happening in Libra on April 12, and you are ready to let go of feeling like you have to do it all at once or all alone. This month is a reminder to take your time with all the experiences you want to have, trusting that they will come to fruition for you.
Mars enters your house of love and partnership on April 18, and you enter a passionate and steamy time. Romance is in the air for you as you move through the month, and you are spending more of your time with those who you want to move forward with. Venus also moves into a relationship area of your chart before April ends, and you are surrounded by love and community. Overall, this month is showing you that you are not alone and you don’t have to go through the heavy stuff alone either.
PISCES
This is a month where your heart is shining, and you are feeling in tune with the progress you have made in your life and within your relationships, Pisces. You are owning your value, your worth, and the beauty of who you are, and are ready to leave the past behind. With Mercury and Venus both going direct in Pisces this month after being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you are in a better space than you have been, and there are fewer obstacles and miscommunications in your life.
You have been through a journey of understanding yourself better through your goals, perspectives, and interests, and have been committing yourself to your authenticity. On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus happening, and this New Moon is a good time for communication matters, getting your message across, and for your creative pursuits. With the clarity you feel within your mind and heart right now, you are making a lot of progress in April and feeling pleased with where life is headed.
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From '106 & Park' To Prime Time, Rocsi Diaz Is Still That Girl
Rocsi Diaz is no stranger to the camera. From her iconic run on 106 & Park to interviewing Hollywood heavyweights on Entertainment Tonight, she’s been at the center of culture for years. Now, she’s back in the hosting chair alongside none other than Deion “Coach Prime” Sanders for We Got Time Today, a fresh talk show exclusive to Tubi.
The show is exactly what you’d expect when you put a media pro and a sports legend together—a mix of real talk, unfiltered moments, and guest interviews that feel like family kickbacks. As the duo wraps up their first season, Rocsi sat down with xoNecole to talk about teaming up with Deion, the wildest moments on set, and why streaming platforms like Tubi are shaking up the talk show world.
Scoring the Gig & Clicking Instantly with Deion
Photo by Paras Griffin/Getty Images for Essence
Deion Sanders had been dreaming of hosting a talk show, and when Tubi came calling, it was only right he made it happen. But before he found the perfect co-host, he held auditions with different women for the spot.
Lucky for us, Rocsi threw her hat in the ring, and the connection was instant. “You just can’t buy chemistry like we have,” she tells us. “We are legit like big brother, little sister—fighting, cracking jokes, telling each other off. When you watch the show, it’s like watching family.”
Mixing News, Culture & Sports—Minus the Snooze
With We Got Time Today, Rocsi and Deion cover everything from the latest headlines to celebrity tea and, of course, sports. But instead of stiff, rehearsed segments, the show keeps it loose and unpredictable.
“We’re not breaking the mold—it’s not rocket science,” Rocsi jokes. “We just bring our own flair, our authenticity, and our personalities to it. Deion has firsthand experience in sports, so when we talk about athletes, he brings a different perspective.”
And the best part? Unlike traditional talk shows that rush through quick interviews, We Got Time Today actually takes its time. “A lot of shows might give you one or two segments with a guest,” Rocsi says. “With us, we actually sit down and have real-life conversations.”
Her Top Guests (So Far!)
From music icons to relationship experts, the show has already had some unforgettable guests—but a few stand out for Rocsi.
“Ice Cube was our first guest, and he’s just legendary,” she says. “Kirk Franklin had us cracking up when he broke into a full choir freestyle for our Christmas special. And anytime we get Dr. Bryant on to put Deion in the hot seat? That’s my favorite!”
And of course, there’s Nick Cannon. “Nick was amazing,” she adds. “You already know he’s going to bring the energy and say something wild.”
Tag-Team Hosting with Deion: The Inside Scoop
While Deion Sanders is best known for his football greatness, Rocsi says he’s also one of the funniest people she’s ever worked with.
“He’s goofy—like, really goofy,” she laughs. “A lot of people didn’t know that side of him, but now they do. He can crack a joke, and if you’re too sensitive, good luck, because he will go in. But the best part? I throw it right back at him! Sometimes we just look at each other like, ‘Okay, that was a good one.’”
But beyond the laughs, she admires his insane work ethic. “Watching him juggle everything he does is just super admirable,” she says.
How "We Got Time Today" Brings That "106 & Park" Energy
Photo by David Livingston/Getty Images
For those wondering if We Got Time Today feels like 106 & Park 2.0, Rocsi says it’s a whole different vibe.
“The only comparison I’d make is that it’s a destination for the culture,” she explains. “It’s a platform where our people can come, feel safe, and have real conversations. But other than that, this is Deion’s world—we’re just having fun in it.”
The Talk Show Shake-Up: Why This Show Hits Different
Unlike traditional networks, We Got Time Today lives exclusively on Tubi, proving that streaming platforms are changing how we watch talk shows.
“Tubi is giving more people opportunities and making content more accessible,” Rocsi says. “Deion is a huge Tubi fan—he literally loves Black cinema—so it just made sense for him. And honestly? He’s got me watching it too!”
Real Ones Only: Women Holding Each Other Down
Rocsi credits her best friend, Chantelle, for always keeping her grounded. “She kept pouring into me, reminding me of who I am,” she shares. Even Deion Sanders makes sure to give her flowers, often calling her “the hostess with the most.”
In the industry, she’s built lasting bonds with women like Julissa Bermundez, Angie Martinez, and Angela Yee. “Julissa and I still kick it—her house is basically Sephora, so I just shop there,” she jokes. She also cherishes her friendships with Melyssa Ford and Robin Roberts, who have offered unwavering support. “Robin has always been there for me,” Rocsi says, reflecting on the wisdom she’s gained from the legendary journalist.
With the show’s first season wrapping up, Rocsi is grateful for the experience and excited for what’s next. “We’re having a good time, and the audience can feel that,” she says.
And if you haven’t tuned in yet? Well, Rocsi and Deion got time—so you might as well make some too.
Catch We Got Time Today now streaming on Tubi!
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