Almost two weeks ago on March 31, 2019, at 3:55 p.m., Nipsey Hussle was pronounced dead. That day, the city of Los Angeles lost a leader, three children lost a father, a mother lost her son, and Lauren London was forced to say goodbye to the love of her life. Senseless violence has been a problem in communities of color for decades, and the death of Nipsey Hussle is proof that we can no longer procrastinate when it comes to change.
In a true act of unity, thousands of people gathered at the Staples Center in Los Angeles to celebrate the life of the gone-too-soon rapper. The last time that the 21,000-seat arena hosted a funeral was 10 years ago for Micheal Jackson's homegoing, and tickets to Nipsey's free-for-all memorial service sold out in 20 minutes. Thursday, friends, family, and fans alike packed out the venue and showed the world that thanks to Nipsey, the Marathon will continue.
If you weren't able to make it to Nipsey's Crenshaw-style celebration of life, here's everything you missed:
It Was A Family Affair
Along with words from Nipsey's children and brother, Mama and Daddy Hussle also had a few words to say on behalf of the man who they raised to later be a legend in the Crenshaw community. Mama Hussle, or Angelique Smith, revealed that she hadn't slept well for weeks leading up to Nipsey's death, and when she got that fateful phone call from the Los Angeles police department that Sunday, she knew why. Although she will never be the same after the loss of her son, she can't be more proud of the legacy he left. She told he told the audience:
"We have to be the light of change that we want in the world. I'm very proud of my son. My son, Ermias Joseph Asghedom, was a great man."
Lauren's son, Cameron, brought the crowd to tears when he shared a dream that he had only days after his death. He explained:
"I was in paradise and I was playing in the ocean water when Ermias popped up right behind me. He said, 'What's up, kiddo?' because that's my nickname to him. I told my mom about the dream and … I realized that Ermias told me what heaven was like. He told me it was paradise."
He continued:
"In the morning Ermias would say 'respect' at my window – so on the count of three I want everyone to yell 'RESPECT!'"
Real tears y'all. Real. Tears.
Stevie Wonder's Performance Was Destiny
"My procedure, stay crackin till my life's low / Then when I die, blue rag around my rifle / Hundred-thousand in my coffin, that's just life though / Play a Stevie Wonder song, smoke some flight, bro / Crack a pint of Actavis then pour in some Sprite, bro / Until that day I'm walking toward what's in my sights, though."
Nipsey Hussle rapped these lyrics in a song on his 2016 mixtape "Slauson Boy 2", and in a very eerie way, was foreshadowing his own death. In an effort to pay tribute to the Crenshaw native, Stevie Wonder was there to play a song and bring this Slauson Boy's story full circle. Before performing a 2-song medley of "Rocket Love" and Eric Clapton's "Tears of Love", Stevie had an important message for the audience in reference to senseless gun violence:
"We, to be a civilized nation, civilized world, we still are living in a time where ego, anger, jealousy is controlling our lives. It is so painful to know that we don't have enough people taking a position that says: 'Listen, we must have stronger gun laws. It's unacceptable. It's almost like the world is becoming blind. I pray that we grow; I pray that the leaders who have a responsibility to perpetuate life will do it by making sure that the laws will make it so very hard for people to have guns and to take their frustrations out."
Star-Studded Tribute
Along with Stevie Wonder, a number of other stars showed major love at the Crenshaw rapper's memorial service. Along with Jay-Z, Beyonce, Teyana Taylor, and Snoop Dogg, Barack Obama himself even wrote a letter sending his condolences to the late entrepreneur's family. In an emotional message read by Karen Civil during the service, President Obama wrote:
"While most folks look at the Crenshaw neighborhood where he grew up and see only gangs, bullets, and despair, Nipsey saw potential. He saw hope. He saw a community that, even through its flaws, taught him to always keep going."
"His choice to invest in that community rather than ignore it -- to build a skills training center and a coworking space in Crenshaw; to lift up the Eritrean-American community; to set an example for young people to follow -- is a legacy worth of celebration. I hope his memory inspires more good work in Crenshaw and communities like it."
Lauren's Tribute Was The Epitome Of Strength
Our heart truly goes out to Lauren London, who has handled this horrible tragedy with so much grace and resilience. I could only imagine losing the love of my life so suddenly and unexpectedly, and that's a loss that no amount of condolences can make better. She told the audience:
"I had to write something because I've never felt this type of pain before. His soul was majestic. He was the strongest man that I ever knew. He was brilliant. He researched everything; completely self-taught and always seeking knowledge."
"My pain is for my 2-year-old, who probably won't remember how much his dad loved him. I'm so honored and blessed that I got to experience such a man."
At the funeral, Lauren also read an emotional text that she sent Nipsey before his passing in a tribute that will give you all the feels. The text read:
"I've learned so much about myself with you. You've been my turn-up and my church. I wouldn't want to go through this journey with anyone but you. I look up to you in a lot of ways, and I strive to educate myself like you have. When we are at odds, I feel defeated and sad, knowing that we are so much better than that. I just want you know that you've been the greatest boyfriend to me. You aren't perfect, but I would never ask you to be. You and I work. We fit. And you're the coolest guy in the world to me. Still. I love you so much, unconditionally. I'm never gonna give up on you. My love and my devotion is to you."
In honor of Nipsey, Lauren also got a tattoo on her forearm to ensure that he's with her wherever she goes, forever. She wrote on Instagram:
"Real Love Never Dies. When you see me, you will always see him #LoveYouHussle #TMC"
The City Of LA Showed Up In Style
In honor of Nipsey's death, for the first time in 27 years, the Los Angeles Bloods and Crips made a truce. This truce marks the first ceasefire since the Rodney King riots and was organized as a tribute to the love that the late rapper brought to the city. Gang leader Big U told Instagram:
"We're having a gang truce and a gang rally so all the different gangs from LA can get together and celebrate the life and the gift of Nipsey. There's a lot of people who said they wanted to get together and come to a vigil and pay respect because Nipsey was the first real LA artist that was from LA."
Rest in Heaven, Nipsey. Thank you for your service to our community and for being a true role model. Nipsey was so much more than a hometown hero, he was a nationwide icon and he won't be forgetten.
Featured image by Shareif Ziyadat/Getty Images.
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Again, the answer never changes because, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna get, it’s 6-8 (sometimes nine) hours of sleep. However, since my chronotype (check out “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”) means that I like/prefer to write in the wee hours of the morning, sometimes I will sleep for the night for five hours and take a nap in the day. And y’all, that is just fine with me because I am well aware of the fact that napping does everything from give me more energy, heighten my alertness and even make me more creative to decrease stress levels, strengthen immunity, and reduce my chances of experiencing a heart attack or stroke.
My problem is I will oftentimes go “overboard” with my daytime zzz’s. What I mean by that is, in order to get the most out of a nap, they say thatyou shouldn’t sleep for longer than 25 minutes or so; otherwise, you could wake up feeling sluggish (I don’t but…). Also, it can make resting, soundly, at night a bit of a struggle.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? We should get quickies in? Yeah. And it’s funny that the word “quickie” would come up because just like a sex quickie can do wonders for you (and it can — check out “12 Super Solid Reasons To Have A Quickie Every Single Day”), it’s a full-circle moment when I say that something that can improve the quality of your sex life is to have a power nap (a nap that lasts between 10-30 minutes).
Wanna know how the two things correlate? Honestly, it’s no secret that sleep and sex work together to optimize both (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”). Today, though, we’re going to tap into how a nap, specifically, can have you partaking in some of the best sex that you’ve experienced in a minute. I’ll explain.
Naps Reduce Stress
GiphyIf you’re feeling super stressed out right now, you are not alone. There is plenty of data out here that says that most of us are stressed for at least a couple of reasons at a time — and that can impact your sexual health on a few levels. For one thing, it can bring about feelings of depression and/or anxiety. Stress can also throw your hormone levels off (including your cycle) which can weaken your libido. Stress can make you want to put distance between you and your partner (yes, literally).
Stress can also make it challenging to get aroused or to have an orgasm. And just what can help to decrease stress? Taking a nap. Since sleep has a way of helping you to “get off of the clock” and relax a bit, that can lower your stress levels and “reset” your body so that you are calmer — and that, in turn, can do wonders for your sex drive and ultimately your sex life.
Naps Improve Your Mood
GiphyThere is one person in my life, and fairly 80 percent of the time, she’s in a super good mood. Oh, but let that girl go without sleep, and…who is this woman? LOL. There’s research behind why this happens. When a person is sleep-deprived, it messes with their brain chemicals, and that can amplify emotions like anger, restlessness and sadness. In fact, one study revealed that people who had their sleep disrupted throughout the night, they ended up having their positive outlook on life reduced by about 30 percent.
And geeze, who wants to have sex when they’re not feeling very good? Anyway, since serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps to regulate your moods, your sleep patterns, and your libido and sleep is what helps to keep it in balance — by taking a nap, not only can it help you to feel better, it can also increase your desire for sex (it can also build up your endurance which is also…sexually beneficial).
Naps Increase Your Focus and Concentration
GiphySomething that some of my clients bring up is how, when it comes to having sex, sometimes the flesh is willing while the spirit is weak because, although the desire for intimacy is there, so much is going on that they aren’t able to get still enough to focus on experiencing copulation with their partner. This also tracks because, when you don’t have enough rest, your brain finds itself not working in harmony and that can make it hard to do everything from approaching life with a sense of flexibility to making necessary decisions.
Certain data also reveal that a lack of rest can cause you to have a really poor attention span and not process things in context (the more you know). So, if you really want to get some yet it’s hard for you to focus long enough to make it happen, ask your bae to lie down with you and take a nap. Between the sleep and the snuggling (check out “Fall's Coming: 8 Wonderful Health Benefits Of Cuddling”) — you may wake up with your mind and body totally on the same page. #wink
Naps Can Make You Feel Better About Your Body
GiphyEven if, overall, you feel really good about your body, I think that we all have moments when we feel less attractive than others — and who wants to have sex when they don’t really feel…very sexy? Well, something else that sleep, in general, can do is increase your confidence in your body.
For one thing, if you want to lose a few pounds, sleep can actually make that happen by helping your body metabolize the glucose (sugar) that’s in it so that you can better manage your appetite. Other studies go on to share that since sleep deprivation can impact one’s mental health and emotional stability in a negative way, of course, getting enough rest would increase body positivity.
Shoot, science even goes so far as to say that insomnia can cause people to have an elevated level of dissatisfaction when it comes to their body image. Don’t take their word for it, though. Look in the mirror before a nap. Then look in a mirror after waking up from me. Do you feel better? I’d be surprised if you don’t.
Makes Your Brain Bigger…Which Could Make Your Orgasms Better
GiphyI saved the best for last by design. Now if you’re wondering how in the world a nap can improve (and possibly increase) your orgasms — oh, there is a method to the madness…trust. For starters, the saying that your biggest sex organ is your brain? That isn’t a myth. Long story less long, the brain is what houses your central nervous system and that is what controls how men and women sexually function (yes, literally).
And since the brain also releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin during sex and brain activity significantly increases in women during sexual activity (especially right before she orgasms) — well, would it trip you out to know that when you take a nap, your brain actually expands? A bigger brain (that’s healthy) can potentially intensify your sexual experiences (and your climaxes) — and who doesn’t want that to go down?
____
Like I said earlier, I never have to be convinced to get a nap in. However, if your sex life has been a bit stagnant lately, you’ve been feeling a little sluggish and you’re not sure what to do — I’m hoping that a nap can get you right.
There’s enough science to prove that it can. All you need to do is give it a shot.
Now where’s your pillow and sleep mask, chile?
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Featured image by FG Trade/Getty Images