Quantcast
RELATED

The other day, I was scrolling through my YouTube homepage, and I came across a video by YouTuber Bria Jones titled “your fear of BEING SEEN is holding you back from your fullest potential…let’s change that.” In the almost 19-minute video, she discussed the many reasons why people may have a fear of being seen and how it can negatively impact their lives. By avoiding being seen, you are masking your true self from others and letting others control your life. One of the solutions Bria suggested was tapping into your inner child because children are usually happy, free, and authentically themselves before the world tries to change them.

One of the reasons why I clicked on the video is because I, too, struggle with being seen. Since last year, I’ve been on a spiritual journey, which has helped me build up my confidence and uncover things about myself, the good and the not-so-good. When I was a child, I was always the center of attention.


You could find me somewhere smiling, talking, showing off my cuteness. But I quickly realized that not only brought a lot of positive attention, it brought a lot of negative attention as well. And as I got older, I became more concerned about what others thought of me and being careful not to step on anybody’s toes. I had become the complete opposite of who I truly was on the inside. It was painful, but I felt paralyzed and couldn’t do anything about it.

There would be moments when I could feel my authentic self trying to break free, but my body wouldn’t move. I’d become scared of being seen. Looking at me, you may not think this was something I deal with or have ever dealt with. I’ve always been fashion-forward, hair done, nails done, smiling, laughing, and I be outside (sometimes). However, there were so many experiences I had that, because of this fear, I was in my head and couldn’t allow myself to enjoy the moment even when the attention was already on me. I would deflect or try to avoid the attention altogether.

But while being on this spiritual journey has helped me a lot to get back to the true essence of London, I still have my moments where I struggle. Being a content creator comes to mind. It’s something about posting certain content on social media that sometimes holds me back from posting. I’m definitely not one of those people who likes to put EVERYTHING on social media, but I do want to create authentic content that connects with others and builds a community with my followers.

That’s why this video couldn’t come at a better time. The tips that Bria provided, such as tapping into your inner child and accepting that not everyone isn’t going to like you, but your content will connect with the right people, is the reminder I needed to always be myself. And for those who are judging you, send them love (in your head). Because, at the end of the day, I refuse to let anyone have that much power over me.

your fear of BEING SEEN is holding you back from your fullest potential...let's change thatwww.youtube.com

Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.

Feature image by Paolo Cordoni/ Getty Images

 

RELATED

 
ALSO ON XONECOLE
Black-woman-basking-in-light-of-the-sun-letting-go

Letting go is a gift we are given and a strength that we find throughout our lives. There are times when we want to grab ahold of what we are experiencing and sensing, and times when we need to let go of something that was once everything to us or what we wanted for ourselves. The moment you conclude that you need to let something go in your life is the moment that your brain fights to make that happen for you.

KEEP READINGShow less
How To Level Up Intimacy And Make 2025 Your Hottest Sex Year Yet

There is a running joke (that I’m actually quite serious about) that I find myself saying to married couples often: “Shoot, with all that comes with being married, y’all deserve to have as many orgasms as you possibly can.” And as someone who has been working with husbands and wives for over 20 years now, I make it my personal mission to provide all of the information that I can to ensure that achieving the peak of satisfactory sex happens — whether they’ve been together for two years, 10 years or 40 years.

KEEP READINGShow less
LATEST POSTS