The Evolution Of Draya Michele From Fine Ass Girl To Fearless Ass Woman
Draya Michele has learned a lot of life lessons over the past few years.
Be careful whom you allow into your circle, because “friends” turn into the foes as quick as a camera flash. Be above the influence, because in a world of photoshopped and carefully cropped images, social media has become a way of controlling the masses, adding unnecessary pressure “to be perfect and to be cool and to be socially accepted,” as Draya would say. And probably one of the biggest lessons of all—and one that Draya has implemented since she first stepped foot in LA—stay focused on your business.
Whether you hate her or love her, one thing that you can’t deny is that Draya Michele is one boss chick. Maybe even somewhat of an opportunist, if you will, because stepping in front of the cameras wasn’t just a selfish attempt to be seen, it was strategic. It was what she felt she had to do in order to build the foundation of her swimsuit line Mint Swim. In order to make her dream happen she turned to the business of reality TV.
“Starting a swimsuit company is something that I've always wanted to do,” says Draya from her Los Angeles home. “I was blocked off from creativity and resources because I was in Pennsylvania, so when I got the call that I was able to do Basketball Wives and move to California, I said oh I have to do this, because this is going to be my chance to get my swimsuit company going.”
Over the last four years, we’ve watched Draya go from a naïve girl from Reading, Pennsylvania to a bold and feisty female who unapologetically speaks her mind—sometimes saying questionable things at the wrong time. She tells me that before the show she was just a girl who was happy to have a way out of Pennsylvania, even if it meant sacrificing her image for fame and a few hundred thousand dollars.
“I was so appreciative of Basketball Wives, and I still am. But I was very eager to get away, so I looked at it like, if this is what I've got to do to move to L.A.—if I have to argue with these girls for four or five months out of the year—then fine; then I can relax the other seven months and not think about them at all,” she says.
In between catfights and petty arguments, she kept her sanity by shifting the focus to growing a side business that would help pad her bank account long after the reality show checks stopped rolling in. Just a few years prior, the now 30-year-old birthed the idea for Mint Swim out of her apartment, turning her den into a makeshift office with custom shelving to house her growing collection of sexy and chic designs that tease the eye and tempt the pocketbook. The swimsuit line has been just as much of a staple in her life as the show that made her famous. And in case you were wondering, Draya has her hands in every aspect of the business from designing to pitching, which she runs with the help of only one other full-time employee—no blueprint, no business plan, just creativity and a will to win.
Perhaps having a more concrete plan would’ve saved her time and money from costly mistakes. She admits to wasting a lot of money on unnecessary things but credits her experiences to help her learn the tricks of the trade, such as shopping around to get the most bang for her buck. To a business owner, lower costs mean higher profit margins.
“It’s best to shop around and get a good price because there are a lot of people out there that'll take advantage of you."
"They'll know that you're new in the industry and they'll look at you as you're green and they'll overprice you. So you have to just do research and check prices between different companies and make people compete, you know? That way you save money and you get the best deal.”
[Tweet "You get ripped off a lot by trying to do things fast."]
Each year the company has continued to double in size, to the point where it has exceeded the money she makes from she show that made her famous, and it has become her primary source of income. She no longer has to rely on the checks that girl fights and club appearances has afforded her, she’s now her own boss and can make her own rules.
“Once my swimsuit company began to grow and develop and it became the number one income source for me, and I saw how much more money I was making from swimsuits than reality TV, I decided that I'm done arguing for four months out of the year. I just didn't want to do it anymore.”
Recently, she announced her resignation from Basketball Wives. In an interview with Juicy Magazine, she says that she “mentally checked out of it” and that she lost the joy of going to work. It’s possible, too, that the show wasn’t just killing her vibe, but killing her image as well. I tell her that being in that kind of space [with reality TV] seems to bring out the worst in people, and that I felt like she was just ready to go.
“I just wanted to focus on my company and make sure that I never ever put myself in a situation that someone was able to bash my company on TV or just put me in a space where I'm not taken serious as a designer because this [fashion] world's really serious to me."
"Reality TV will make you say anything, whether it's hurtful, or whether it's going to take money out of your pocket. I just didn't want to take that risk anymore."
Every time I put myself in front of the camera it was another opportunity for someone to say anything they wanted about me. It didn't have to be true, it could just be hurtful and we had two million viewers, it's like, some of those two million are going to believe whatever was said about me.”
There’s no doubt that being a reality star equipped Draya with the tough skin that was necessary to start her own clothing line. The same confidence that she had to develop whenever a new episode aired exposing her to a flood of negative comments is the same confidence that was needed when she started posting her designs on social media.
In one interview she admits to not posting pictures of her models because she didn’t want to expose them to the hatred and backlash from her followers, but has since has changed her tune by launching Mint More. The new line of swimwear is for those full-figured beauties who are often neglected or left with less-desirable options in the swimsuit market. She found a gem in one of her models, Nancy, who she says she selected due to her confidence.
“Just being a plus-size model itself is hard because a lot of people are too ignorant and don't understand it,” she says. “[Nancy] was just everything I needed her to be, and the reaction was great. I thought people were going to talk about her size and her curves, but there were so many people that were happy and they were saying yes, Draya, finally. This is real, real women are shaped like this, this is amazing, what you're doing.”
Building Mint Swim has also given the designer the courage to launch other clothing lines, including Fine Ass Girls, which caters to a younger demographic, and also a menswear line, which she says is moving slower than anticipated.
Besides being her own boss, behind closed doors she’s also a devoted mother and wife-to-be. Yet, despite her obvious growth, Draya is still shedding the images of her past. Reality TV fights, rumors about her parenting, and who she has or hasn't dated have all overshadowed the woman that she’s attempted to portray to the public—a woman who’s soft and delicate, but still alludes strength and resilience.
Having her life play out in front of critical eyes hasn’t made it any easier to maintain a healthy relationship for the 30-year-old either. Earlier this year, we witnessed the falling out between her and on-again, off-again fiancé Orlando Scandwick, cornerback for the Dallas Cowboys before the couple reconciled and welcomed a baby boy. When I ask about this, she suggests that being well known made it difficult to keep her love affair going strong.
“We're learning to just not put everything on social media,” Draya says. “But the way that social media works, it's so pressuring to have your love life out there because you have this fear that if you don't post about it, it's not happening. I finally feel like I'm at the point where I don't have to post every single thing.”
So social media caused issues in your relationship in some way?
“I wouldn't blame it on social media, I would just blame it on the influence it has over actual people. We've got to learn to not let social media control us. People are obsessed with the way other people look on social media. At the end of the day, it's social media; you can trick yourself to look however you'd like.”
[Tweet "We've got to learn to not let social media control us."]
Draya is at a point where she’s less concerned about what people think, and more focused on managing her household and making her family a priority. Running to her son’s soccer games, her fiancé’s football games, and being her own boss doesn’t come without its struggles, but she says time management allows her to make sure that everyone in the house gets the attention that they need.
I ask her what being a woman and a mother mean to her.
“I think that we're here to uplift our men and raise our children. And being a mom means believing, leading by example, and trying to set a blueprint and create a legacy for what you created.”
It’s clear that Draya is starting to grow into her own. Is she perfect? Not at all. But she’s definitely not the same Draya that left Pennsylvania years ago. What we’re witnessing now is the evolution of a fine ass girl to a fearless ass woman—one who’s sexy and confident, and knows how to handle her own on and off the camera.
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Alaska Wasn’t On My Bucket List, But My Glacier Adventure Made Me A Believer
We all have bucket list destinations at the top of our lists. I visited one of those at the top of 2024: Japan! But what happens when you get an opportunity to go someplace that wasn’t on it? For me, that was Alaska. Now, I’d submitted my short film to the Anchorage International Film Festival, genuinely thinking it would be a long shot to get in with a short film about fibroids and Black women’s health.
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
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Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert