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The Era Of Social Distancing Has Made Social Media A Lifeline For Connection
I have a love/hate relationship with social media. I keep my social dealings pretty basic—Facebook for family, Instagram for friends, WhatsApp for travel. I had an extremely brief run on Snapchat until Instagram Stories became a thing and I was able to rid myself of one less app on my phone. Now under the current circumstances we're in (*enter* coronavirus), social media has become a lifeline to the rest of the world, and I'm being bombarded with multiple requests from everyone I know to join apps to connect.
While I'm grateful for a network of folks who want to make sure they see my face and hear from me, it's also overwhelming, not to mention it's taking a toll on my phone's storage. I've never TikTok'd or Marco Polo'd but now I feel the pressure is strong to keep up. My social anxiety doesn't translate well on social media either. Sharing updates on what I'm eating, where I'm going, and who I'm with kind of seems like something my mom would have begged for when I was 15, and at nearly 30, I prefer a good ole phone call or text over anything else. But quarantine life is different, because now I don't see anyone's face, ever, except for my mom who finally got her wish and knows exactly what I'm eating (whatever's in the kitchen), where I'm going (to the living room), and who I'm with (her).
As someone who has always streamlined their social media, but also wants to stay in touch, here's my take on navigating these quarantine-popular apps.
Zoom
I was vaguely familiar with the video conferencing platform Zoom because prior to the world ending I was interviewing for jobs and this was the form of communication most companies preferred. It cut out having to travel to various offices around New York City and only required me to wear a blouse, most of the time paired with sweats. These meetings were usually set up by some HR executive who probably had a certification in Zoom practices because using Zoom with friends is way trickier.
The main reason is that Zoom requires planning, therefore taking away any spontaneity out of your virtual linkup. Setting up a Zoom chat went something like this…
I sent a text asking, "Hey, who's free Thursday at 8 pm.. for a girl's night in on Zoom?" Everyone was free as I suspected because, hello, quarantine. I texted meeting info with a note for everyone to look cute for each other. Thursday at 8:08 p.m. no one including myself was on the call because even in quarantine I'm running late. I texted asking if everyone is hopping on and one person replied. I logged on looking about as cute as one possibly could in an oversized tee, but luckily my pal had on the same "outfit" ignoring my previous request.
We chit-chatted trying to save the tea for when our missing friend arrived, but she never did. She didn't respond until the next day because she fell asleep, probably of boredom. We rescheduled for a Zoom brunch at 2 p.m. that Saturday. I was five episodes deep into Netflix's Tiger King trying to solve a murder when I realized it's 2:02 p.m. I looked at my phone, no one texted. I continued my investigation on the couch until both my friends backed out because of [insert excuse here] and I finally took a well-deserved nap after all my hard detective work. I woke up two hours later to a text from another friend I invited to join the "brunch" in a separate text thread asking what happened.
The takeaway? HR executive with Zoom certification is not in my future. Despite all the kinks I hit, I'll still be re-scheduling our linkup via Zoom. I appreciate that there's no messaging or posts to keep up with on Zoom so you can use when you want and forget about it after.
Marco Polo
Speaking of keeping up, Marco Polo is an app that's kind of like leaving video voicemails for one person or a group. My church friend convinced me to download this when quarantine rules went into effect as a way to keep up with the other outreach team members. I was into it that week recording a greeting to the other eight members, checking in during the Sunday service live-stream, and seeing my church friend's play-by-play as she watched The Handmaid's Tale for the first time, in the separate chat we started. It was all fun and games, and Jesus until a week later when I was 70 unwatched messages deep and my church pal was searching for me in our one-on-one thread. Oops!
Never-ending group chats were always a turn-off for me, and essentially that's what Marco Polo becomes when it's a bunch of people. I might put off watching one message which eventually piles up into many until I feel SO guilty that I decide to put off watching any altogether. My social anxiety manifests differently and in this instance, although I felt completely comfortable with my friend who initially invited me into the group, I didn't have personal relationships with the others. It just felt strange giving updates on my life to those who weren't a part of it, especially during these uncertain times when my updates aren't always cheery. I say leave the Marco Polo chats for close friends and family and if you want to continue a conversation, pick up a phone.
Houseparty
Houseparty is probably my favorite quarantine-trendy app for face-to-face time. I'm a 90s kid at heart and HP gives me all the AIM feels just with video. It follows the same format of letting people know when you're logged on, or in HP's case "in the house". It even takes it one step further by showing friends who log on if you're already videoing with someone which is a little invasive for me, but not so invasive if you're curious to see who is talking to who because what better way to pass the time than by cyber-stalking? You can lock your chat room if you want, but there's no fun in that.
I enjoy Houseparty mostly because of the games—trivia, Heads Up, Quick Draw, and something called Chips and Guac that I have yet to try. It's much more enjoyable than just staring at someone's face if you're all talked out. I had a game night with a friend which consisted of us sipping drinks in our respective homes, he DJ'd, and we played games till I woke up on my living room floor at 3 a.m. covered in Oreo crumbs.
I should mention that at some point I snuck away from game night to munch on Oreos because that's what I do after a night out and that was the closest experience I've had to "going out" in weeks. Houseparty and tequila combined will pop any social media introvert's cherry, just save the shenanigans for a Friday night.
The Verdict:
A phone call is still my preferred method of communication unless you think I might want to see your face (aka you're my Grandma, my BFF, or trying to be my husband), but we're only a month into this quarantine thing so that might change. There's still plenty of time for me to become a Zoom-certified HR exec (I'm pretty sure I made that up), to watch those 70 Marco Polo videos and reply with "LOL", and I may or may not have a secret TikTok account that will go public my next tequila-filled Houseparty chat. Or not.
Social media your own way, not because you feel it's some sort of quarantine-mandated rule. The ones that matter most will find a way to reach you.
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Jazmine A. Ortiz is a creative born and raised in Bushwick, Brooklyn and currently living in Staten Island, NY. She started in the entertainment industry in 2012 and now works as a Lifestyle Editor where she explores everything from mental health to vegan foodie trends. For more on what she's doing in the digital space follow her on Instagram at @liddle_bitt.
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
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The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
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Exclusive: After Focusing On His Career For So Long, David Banner Is Now Ready To Find A Wife
During the Fight Night: The Million Dollar Heistpremiere, David Banner, who stars in the film, opened up about his weight loss and his desire to get married and start a family. At 50, David has accomplished many feats, from rapping, producing, and acting, and now he's ready for the next phase of his life. "I want to get married," he tells xoNecole.
"I'm tired. I want to find my wife, have some kids. We chase all of these esoteric goals, and sometimes we look back, and we left the things that really matter. I looked up one day, I had all of them, the music accolades, the film accolades, not all the ones that I want, but a lot of them. I had accomplished my goal, had chased my goal so long that when I looked up, I saw that I ran off and left everything else."
He also shares how working in the entertainment industry can sometimes affect his life and relationships with others. "We forget to be human beings, and people don't allow us to be human beings," he continues. "So, that's the reason why I said what I said, because I know what y'all platform means, and I want people to know that there are still some human beings that's up on that camera, and sometimes we hurt too."
Back in 2016, the "Like a Pimp" artist released the single "Marry Me" and shared in an exclusive interview with us how he is working on becoming his best self for his future wife.
"I just want to be the man that most Black women want to marry. I want to be a Black man that stands strong," he said. "I'm not perfect, but [I want to be the man] women want to marry and that kids want to be their father. I want to be that man. [When I die] I want people to say that that's a strong African man, I am proud that he's a part of my culture."
During our most recent interview with the "Get Like Me" rapper, he also revealed that he lost 35 lbs and dished on how important it is to take care of your body. "I have this thing that I want to be our children's superhero on the screen and off, and people always talk about mental health, but part of your mental health is what you put in your body," he says.
"People always talk about God. People always talk about the church, but the real church is your body, your temple. So I am treating my body and my temple as if God is in there."
Fight Night is out now on Peacock.
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Feature image by Gilbert Carrasquillo/GC Images