September is all about getting organized, working together with others, having patience, and believing in your dreams. There are real possibilities and opportunities for growth this month, but it’s all about perspective and where you choose to focus your vision. With Virgo Season in full swing, there is more to get done and do than any other time of the year, as Virgo is all about accomplishing the mission. However, rushing your intentions or the work you are doing can lead you to places that don’t serve, and having patience with yourself and others while handling business this month is key. Use your intuition wisely, trust your instincts, and get creative.
On September 5, Venus moves into Virgo and is ready to clean house. Anything or anyone that isn’t healthy or beneficial to your heart is not sustainable in this energy, and Venus in Virgo expects the best of the best. This month is about recognizing the power you hold in life, and knowing you deserve everything you truly want in love. A few days later, Mercury goes retrograde for the third time this year. Mercury will begin its retrograde transit in Libra from September 9 to September 23 and will finish its retrograde transit in Virgo from September 23 to October 2.
With both of these signs being very logical signs, it’s all about the mind and communication right now. This time is about paying attention to the signs, not getting too ahead of yourself, and of taking things one day at a time. Know that the messages will come, but it’s also equally important to tap into and understand your own personal truths as well so that you can communicate that clearly.
The Full Moon occurring mid-month on September 10 is happening in Pisces, and it is the Harvest Full Moon of the year. This Full Moon is all about dreams coming true and manifestations appearing. A Full Moon in Pisces gets emotional, and overall this is a time of deep growth happening within and without. On September 22, Libra Season begins, and the energy moves from detail-oriented, goddess energy Virgo, into relationship-oriented, love-focused Libra. With Libra Season moving through, new relationship developments will be taking place at the end of the month and September is a time of working together with others instead of alone.
The New Moon in Libra on September 25 before the month ends is bringing this love energy front and center, and by the end of the month, you should be setting your intentions for love, connection, and balance. September is overall about giving yourself and others grace and believing in the beauty and magic of what is becoming for you. Here's what else the month has in store for your zodiac sign.
Aries Horoscope for September 2022
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleSeptember is a month of paving new paths for yourself and seeing new doors open for you in life, Aries. The focus is on the work you are doing right now, and the return you are seeing. It’s all about finding the balance between your work priorities and what your body and your health need from you as well. With the Sun moving through your 6th house of daily routines for most of the month, this is the time to get organized, make space, and focus on what is best for you overall.
Mercury goes retrograde this month and will be moving retrograde in your 7th house of love and relationships from September 9 to September 23. With a New Moon also in this area of your chart on September 25, the message is clear right now, and that is that sometimes it’s better to come together with others and work as a team, rather than trying to have the upper hand. Seek the peace within your relationships, and take note of what abundant circumstances are appearing for you.
Taurus Horoscope for September 2022
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis month is all about emotional freedom, joy, and connection, Taurus. There are a lot of positive experiences for you to enjoy in September, and you are feeling like you have your people around you, supporting you every step of the way. This is the month to share the love and allow yourself to receive it as well. When you can live in your authentic truths, you inspire others to as well and people are meeting you where you are.
The Sun and Venus are moving through your 5th house of romance for most of the month, and love is truly on your side right now. The intentions you have been setting when it comes to your love life and your close relationships are seeing fruition, and it feels good to know where you stand with others and vice versa. The Full Moon on September 10 is a time of revelation when it comes to your friendship and community, and you are gaining clarity on who has been there for you through it all this month.
Gemini Horoscope for September 2022
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleSeptember is all about having patience, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going into retrograde this month, there is a need to take things slower, water your seeds, and give yourself grace through what is becoming for you right now. The more you can live day by day trusting yourself, your value, and your gift of manifestation, the more you can allow the universe to meet you halfway. Lists of gratitude serve your soul well this month, and it’s all about perspective.
Mercury will be in retrograde in your 5th house of romance for a few weeks, then it will move into the area of your birth chart having to do with the home and your foundations in life. Overall this month is about finding the balance between having fun and protecting your energy, and sometimes you need time to figure out which is which. The New Moon in fellow air sign Libra happening at the end of the month on September 25 will be an awakening experience for you and will allow you to reconnect with your hope and inspiration.
Cancer Horoscope for September 2022
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleThis is a groundbreaking month for you, Cancer. Things are changing for you this month but they are overall changes that have needed to be made and are setting you up on the path toward success. September is all about flowing through change and finding your ground no matter what is happening around you. Remember that the Universe has your back, and go from there. You are stronger than you know.
There is a Full Moon happening on September 10 in fellow water sign Pisces, and this Full Moon will be giving you all the insight and clarity on where expanding your horizons is necessary, and on seeing the bigger picture. With Mercury moving retrograde in your 4th house of home, family, foundations, and your inner world for most of the month, foundations are shaking and you are getting the opportunity to rebuild for yourself in a way that makes more sense for you. Remember that what leaves your life is not sustainable for you to continue and that the detours you are experiencing this month are blessings.
Leo Horoscope for September 2022
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleNow that Leo Season has passed, you are getting the opportunity to regroup, reflect, and get some much-needed rest, Leo. There is an energy of a lot happening in your life this past month and for September, and allowing yourself and your mind time to process means everything right now. Don’t overthink things or sell yourself short, and trust that giving yourself time and grace to work through what is appearing for you now will be better for everyone in the long run.
With the Sun and Venus moving through your 2nd house of income, value systems, assets, and self-confidence in life for most of the month, you are gaining clarity on what you are putting out, what you are receiving, and if this is where you want to be in life. You deserve to live abundantly and find stability in this success, and September is the month of recognizing what you need and if you are truly getting that in life. Don’t be afraid to flip the script this month, switch things up, and ask for what you want.
Virgo Horoscope for September 2022
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVirgo Season is underway, and the spotlight is on you right now, Virgo! September is your month of stepping up, leading the pack, and showing up for yourself and your life. You are feeling powerful every step of the way this month and are not only proving to others what you are capable of, but most importantly proving it to yourself as well. Remember that who you are is beautiful and enough, and allow your authenticity to shine in all its glory this month.
Your ruling planet Mercury will be going retrograde on September 9 and will begin its transit in Libra and your 2nd house of income, before moving into Virgo and your 1st house of self from September 23 to October 2nd. Overall, this is a time of going over your finances, replanning, and valuing yourself more than anything. With Venus in Virgo from September 5 to September 29, the confidence will be with you to move through anything, and there will be love showering on you in magical ways. You can get through anything, Virgo, and you are doing so with a smile on your face this month.
Libra Horoscope for September 2022
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleSeptember is a month of balance and synergy for you, Libra. This is the month where you are experiencing a coming together in your life, and love and magic are unfolding for you right now. With a lot of energy in Libra this month, things are moving fast for you, but you’re dancing with life as if it is nothing to you but another day. The cycles of life are moving, and you are finding a lot of gratitude for the way things have panned out for you.
With Mercury going retrograde in your sign from September 9 to September 23, Libra Season beginning on September 22, a New Moon in Libra on September 25, and Venus entering Libra on September 29, the message is clear right now; and that is to spend more time on yourself and for yourself. Don’t be afraid to be a little more selfish this month, as this is the time for you to recognize the gifts you hold, the beauty within you, and the power you have in life. Repeat, “I love who I am, and I love who I am becoming” throughout the month.
Scorpio Horoscope for September 2022
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleSeptember is all about clarity and recognition for you, Scorpio. Truths are coming to the surface this month that cannot be denied, and the answers are right in front of you. This is the month to listen to your heart, open your mind, and prepare for a new day. Remember that you are beautiful and capable no matter who else can see that, and the more you believe in yourself and all that is possible for you in life, the more blessings that can show up for you this month.
The Sun and Venus will be moving through your 11th house of friendship for most of September, and this is a good month to expand your horizons, network, and meet new people. Focus on your intentions right now and know that the key to manifesting is to believe it is already so, rather than getting stuck in the vision of worry or of what you don’t want. The New Moon at the end of the month is closing some chapters in your life, and you are ready for this release.
Sagittarius Horoscope for September 2022
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleSeptember is an inspiring month for you, Sagittarius. This is the month to move forward with your passions and tap into your inner courage and creativity. Remember that you are protected and supported every step of the way on your journey in life and that your wise soul is needed in this world. It’s all about your aspirations and expressing yourself and your gifts in September. It’s time to shine, Sag!
The energy is in your 10th house of career and reputation this month, and this is a good time for following through on your goals and knocking off your to-do list. Personal achievements are being made in September, and the light is shining on you right now. With Mercury moving retrograde in your house of intentions, hopes, and dreams for most of the month, your goals may be looking different right now than they did before, and that’s okay. Instead of doing things how you always have, look for new ways to express yourself and be open to new possibilities right now.
Capricorn Horoscope for September 2022
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleLove is flowing through your world this month, Capricorn. Soulmate connections are in your life, and there is so much love around you in September. This is the month to come together with others and allow your heart to experience all the beauty and joy that this life has to offer you. Opposites attract, and that is the energy you are feeling this month. You are seeing that previous conflicts or disagreements don’t have a space in your heart today, and you are tapping into the forgiveness, grace, and commitment that is in your life right now.
With the Sun and Venus in fellow earth sign Virgo for most of the month and moving through your house of adventure and travel, this is a good month to go on an adventure. Take that trip that you’ve been putting off, read that book that’s collecting dust on your shelf, and expand your horizons. The Full Moon in Pisces mid-month is also coming through with all the intuitive guidance you are looking for. This is a month of enlightenment, communicating from the heart, and following your intuition.
Aquarius Horoscope for September 2022
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleSeptember is a month of new beginnings for you emotionally, Aquarius. Your heart is opening up to something new, and you are walking through new doors this month. September is your time to be free, live free, and allow yourself to rewrite your story. Remember that this life is yours to live and that you don’t need approval from anyone else to be happy. You deserve this fresh start that this month is bringing into your life.
With Mercury moving retrograde in a spiritual, adventurous, and inspiring area of your chart this month, the clarity may be a little more difficult to attain for the time being. Work with what is presenting itself to you, and know that everything you need to know will be shown to you at the right time. Be patient when it comes to plans and detours, and trust that when you follow your intuition, you will be on the right path. The New Moon happening before the month ends is bringing things full circle in your life and clearing any obstacles that presented themselves to you in September.
Pisces Horoscope for September 2022
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecoleImportant achievements are being made this month, and you are getting the positive recognition you deserve, Pisces. September is a month of victory for you, and a month to move through confidently. Be your biggest cheerleader this month and allow others to show you their support as well, trusting that it’s coming from a genuine place and that you are deserving of the success that is unfolding for you now. You are moving mountains in September and claiming your blessings.
With a New Moon in your sign mid-month on September 10, you are seeing your intentions manifest into your reality. This New Moon is all about positive recognition, and seeing yourself in the beautiful way you wish others to. Self-love rituals are key this month, and you deserve to be adorned and treated right. With the Sun and Venus also moving through your 7th house of love for most of September, there is a lot of harmony, grace, and love showering down upon you this month, soak it in.
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Taja, an actress known most for her role on BET’s The Oval, and businessman/model Ryan Easter tied the knot on July 27 in an intimate and beautiful wedding in LA - surrounded by friends and family. During our 40+ minute conversation, the newlyweds opened up about the inner work journey they both went through individually to become their best selves.
Taja revealed that her grateful and light spirit came after being in a depressive state and doing a great deal of healing and education. And Ryan shared how losing a parent as a youth affected how he showed up in the world and the truths he had to face to embrace who he is wholly.
The pair also chatted about the power of intention, the importance of working through trauma, and the work they do every day to honor their partnership. There’s a reason their glow is so beautiful! It comes from the inside.
“You're meeting me now after I've done all this work, but I had to go through it to get to that space and be in a very happy, healed relationship,” Taja says. Check out the layered conversation below.
xoNecole: I’ll start with the most obvious question: how did you two meet, and what were your initial feelings about each other?
Ryan Easter: We connected through friends. At the time, I was in New York, and she was back and forth between LA and Atlanta. But our mutual female friends were together and decided they needed to set me up. So they confirmed I was looking for something serious and then sent me her picture.
And I was like, "Okay, she looks good - a chocolate drop." But then I thought, "What's wrong with her? So, I called them up, and one of them was messing with me and said, "Oh, she's a little crazy." I was like, "Whoa, I can't do crazy anymore. I've dealt with that before. I’d rather stay by myself than deal with that again." Then she clarified, "No, I'm just kidding. She's crazy in a good way. She's a lot of fun and has her stuff together. That’s how it started for me.
Taja Simpson: I was just going about my life, getting ready for another season of The Oval, when I got a text from my friend Natasha. She said, "Hey, I don't think you're dating anybody, but I have a friend I think you should meet. He's a great guy." She gave me this huge pedigree, saying they had been friends for 19 years. I thought, "Wow, he sounds amazing." But when she sent me a photo, I didn’t like it.
Later, I thought about it and figured it could just not be a good picture. So she sent his Instagram which had all these modeling fitness pictures and stuff. And then I was like, wow - you had my whole husband this time and didn’t tell me - now I told her she could give him my number.
"I was just going about my life, getting ready for another season of The Oval, when I got a text from my friend Natasha. She said, "Hey, I don't think you're dating anybody, but I have a friend I think you should meet. He's a great guy." She gave me this huge pedigree, saying they had been friends for 19 years. I thought, "Wow, he sounds amazing." But when she sent me a photo, I didn’t like it."
Taja Simpson & Ryan Easter
Photo by @jorgemezaphotos
xoN: I love that because, you know, there's all these conversations about the ways people meet, and I still feel like friends and family are one of the best ways. It’s like they know you! What are your thoughts?
Ryan: Yeah, absolutely! You feel a great sense of obligation to be the best version of yourself because you’re not just representing yourself; you’re also representing the person who referred you. I can’t go out there acting like a fool and have them looking at their friend like, "Why did you hook me up with this clown?" It’s like, we're gonna be clear and honest about our intentions. And if it works, great, and if it doesn't, it's okay.
Taja: Exactly. When he called, we spoke that day for like, an hour. The rest was history. We just connected, and it was great. After that, we started talking every day, and now here we are.
xoN: Okay, so tell me about your first date! Do you remember where you went? What did you do? How was the vibe?
Taja: Our first in-person date was two months after we met over the phone. This was during COVID, so we got introduced in July 2020 but didn’t meet until September. From July to September, we were doing video dates and phone calls, building up this excitement about meeting in person. I was really nervous. I thought, "Oh my God, is it going to be like it was over the phone?" We really connected and vibed. I was there to pick him up at LAX, and I felt like this was it. I thought, "God put this brother in my life to be this good, this perfect." It felt too good to be true.
I actually had a friend meet us at the airport to film our meeting without him knowing. I told her to stay in the corner and keep the camera hidden. When he was coming down the escalator, I had this whole plan to run up to him in slow motion and jump into his arms. When I saw him, I froze. I was so nervous that I couldn’t move! He came up to me, gave me a big hug, and swung me around, and I just thought, "Wow!" Everything I planned went out the window.
Ryan: I was really excited to meet her, too. Technically, our first date was at Firestone Brewery. After the airport, we went back to her place to drop off my stuff, and then she said, "I like to drink beer," so she took me to a brewery nearby.
I remember being there, and we were kind of embracing, but not too much since it was technically the first time we were in physical proximity. You still have to play it cool, even after talking for a while. But every time I touched her, it felt good. I thought, "Yeah, this is it." When we hugged at the airport, I felt like, "Yo, this is home." At that moment, I knew she was the one.
xoN: Ugh, I love that. So when did the courtship start to develop into a relationship? Did y'all have that conversation?
Ryan: Initially, we were very clear about our intentions. We were both dating with purpose and had similar aspirations of eventually finding someone to marry, start a family, create businesses together, and live our lives to the fullest. We knew from the beginning that this was our goal and checked in with each other to see if we were on the same page.
After establishing our intentions, it was about having those small conversations. We discussed what was important to each of us—our needs, wants, likes, dislikes, triggers, and traumas. All those details are crucial for building a solid foundation for a healthy relationship. We spent a lot of time getting to know the real person, not just the representative we might present to the world.
Sometimes, it’s difficult because it requires us to be extremely vulnerable. For men, especially in our society, vulnerability is often frowned upon, making it hard to expose that sensitive side. You never know how people will react—some might use it against you, while others might protect you.
I think for her; it took her understanding that mentality that men have and use that to her advantage to make sure she's like, look, this is a safe space for you to allow me to see the full person that you are. I appreciated that because, like, I would tell her, if you really want a man to value you, he has to feel safe with you, right, not necessarily in a physical capacity but more so from an emotional standpoint; I need to feel like I can be safe with you emotionally.
So that courtship was a lot of just having those serious, sometimes difficult conversations about things we're going through in the past to things we aspire to accomplish in the future, to things that we're currently dealing with, and started to gain that understanding about who we are and what we aspire to be, and just continue to flow.
"So that courtship was a lot of just having those serious, sometimes difficult conversations about things we're going through in the past to things we aspire to accomplish in the future, to things that we're currently dealing with, and started to gain that understanding about who we are and what we aspire to be, and just continue to flow."
Taja: I mean, that's exactly right, and a lot of it we spoke about even before we met. Because it was this free thing where we didn’t know each other. We didn't have to be a representative. I was just my authentic self. It’s like - I'm an actor, and I got five or six characters that may come out in our conversation. I'll be funny, then the next moment, I'll be serious. It just happens.
I was very vocal about how I foresee my life going. Also, because I'm in entertainment, that played a part. I had met people before who couldn't handle that. They wanted a woman with a nine-to-five, a teacher, or just somebody with a very strict schedule. But that wasn't me. So I think we were super intentional when it came to dating and making sure we can build and grow together. So, we made that commitment prior to him leaving. He came to LA for a week, and the day before he left, it was like, okay, so this is it.
xoN: I’ve noticed that intention and vulnerability are both powerful words that you two keep using, which I think is essential for any long-term relationship. What are some of your other shared values?
Ryan: Also, we both understood the power of mindset. When you see successful or unsuccessful people, sometimes others will attribute their state to their family or money. And I'm not saying that that doesn't help. But there are a lot of people who have come from very humble beginnings and very troubled past that have gone on to do great things, and it all had to do with their mindset. They had to leave and see themselves doing what they desired to do before it became a reality in the physical realm.
I think a lot of those beliefs and mentalities that we shared was refreshing because, you know, we've all known people that every time you talk to them, something bad is going on. And it's such a drag because they can bring your energy down. We don't subscribe to that. Not saying that we don't go through tough times. But when we do, the question that we always ask ourselves is, what is it that I'm supposed to learn from this? I think those type of elements of just being in alignment mentally about how we view the world definitely help to solidify our relationship and our connection.
Taja: When we met, I was in a headspace of growth. We now call it believe, evolve, become because you have to believe that thing right in order to show up. We both understand that your vibration precedes your manifestation, so you have to vibrate and believe at a certain level. Act as if you have to be in that space, that energy, in order for that thing to come so you can evolve and then become whatever that said thing is. But I was in that headspace before we met, and I was clearing out people in my life.
I was really intentional with finding someone that was in that headspace, too. I was not okay with anyone being stagnant.
Taja Simpson & Ryan Easter
Photo by @jorgemezaphotos
xoN: You two seem so evolved individually and collectively. I'm curious, were there any challenges that you two had to get through together, and what did you learn from that experience?
Ryan: Being parents. And if your partner doesn't have a great pregnancy, then it can be tough, and it stretches you in a lot of ways. But I would definitely say the first five months of being new parents was a lot because we were both exhausted. And she's also trying to heal her body because giving birth puts a tremendous amount of stress on the woman's body. It gives you a different respect for the strength of femininity because I wouldn't want to go through that. And I was there the whole 29 hours.
So during that time I'm getting snappy because I need to rest. I have not been able to rest, and I'm sleep-deprived, and I don't feel like I got my foot in yet. And, and then, on top of that, you have this, this really small human that's completely dependent upon you. They can't do anything for himself, and that, even psychologically, that's a lot to carry. But the thing that I think that has helped us is that we understand that we won't always be on the same page. It's okay to have disagreements, but you always have to lead with love, meaning that if I'm upset with her or she's upset with me, we focus on what the issue is.
Taja: I had a horrible pregnancy and was still feeling like I want to be productive; it’s just part of who I am. And during the newborn phase, like he said, we were exhausted. We were zombies. I'm getting whiny. I need sleep. He's getting snappy and short, and we're having to figure out us. The hardest thing is trying to still learn how to effectively communicate in the midst of this space where you are exhausted; you don't feel good, nothing's going your way.
But I'm a big believer of being accountable, especially for women, because women are not always accountable. But we encourage each other to address the trauma and encourage positive self-thought and talk. Because what you think, speak, and do creates power for better and worse.
xoN: Were there any past traumas you had to heal from in order to love each other correctly, and do you feel comfortable discussing them?
Ryan: For me, the biggest thing was my father’s death at nine. You’re young, and you don’t know how to process the loss. It’s one of those things I thought I dealt with, but when I got into my adult years, I realized it didn’t. I always felt like I had to go above and beyond because I didn’t have my father there to be a man - I excelled in sports and academics, but it was based on an inadequate feeling.
I understand the importance of fathers in children’s life but you still have the power to be the best version of yourself whether your father is there or not. And I believe the almighty Creator will put people in your life to be the best version of yourself. I wanted to be that confident person for her and our children - and I didn’t want to carry that trauma into our relationship or our son. So I worked on it before us and I continue to now.
Taja: Mine was colorism. I grew up where the brown paper bag thing was a thing. There were kids I couldn’t play with because “I was too Black.” I had a family member who called me “Ew.” Like she’d literally say, come here, Ew, you ugly thing. And my family, for a long time, didn’t realize how it was breaking me. But eventually, my mom noticed and taught me more about self-esteem and then I started to do the work. But it still shows its head. I still would have thoughts that I’m not good enough because of how I look. I’ve literally not tried out for roles because of that. One of my friends’ friends has literally called out once that I was the only dark person at an event.
So when I started doing the work, I noticed the ways it showed up, like I just wouldn’t want to be in the sun long. I mean when I was younger, I used to pray to God to make me “better” or lighter. It took a long time to really get over that. There’s a book I wrote called Women Who Shine - where I got my thoughts out about this.
So he knows my sensitive spots and speaks to the little girl in me. It's so interesting how the things we go through when we’re young affect us in adulthood. Mental health is as important as physical health - and I’m grateful that he understands the importance of both of those.
xoN: Thank you for your vulnerability. I hope it helps someone else. Finally, I’ll close with this: what’s your favorite thing about each other?
Ryan: Definitely her mindset. She doesn’t have a victim mindset; she’s empowered. That’s so attractive. I believe that she prides herself on being a good, great communicator. She moves with integrity, you know, I think that's important. And you know, she also understands the importance of taking care of her physical, emotional, and mental wellbeing.
Taja: There’s so many. Where do I start? My husband is supremely supportive. I absolutely love that about him. Also, I love his intention. I love how effectively he communicates. I love how he fathers our child. I love how he looks. Because, praise God. Okay, I'm just gonna put that out there.
But you know what, my favorite thing about him is that I love that he's a man of integrity.
Integrity was the highest things on my list when I’d write out what I wanted in a partner. Because it’s everything. And so I love that I feel the level of safety that I feel with him, that I can completely be my 100% authentic self. I know that he's taking care of me, my heart, and our family. We're good.
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Feature image by @jorgemezaphotos
Or, if Christmas is your favorite time of the year, “Are You Ready To Have Some Very Merry 'Christmas Sex'?” may provide you with some holiday inspiration (speaking of Christmas, instead of rose petals, how about putting some poinsettia leaves on your bed? If you heard somewhere that they can be toxic, you’d have to eat like 500 of them for that to be the case, so no worries).
This year, along these same lines, I decided to share 12 creative things that you can do starting now through Christmastime. Each idea is festive, fun, and has its own aphrodisiac element to it that very well could turn this holiday season into some of the best sex that you’ve ever had. Ready?
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1. Snowstorm Sound Effects
Charge it to my mother being a New Yorker and/or me being born in Nebraska, but whenever I think of a romantic getaway, being in a log cabin that’s surrounded by nothing but pine trees and tons of snow is my idea of a really good time. Hmph, meanwhile, I’m writing this while Nashville is currently in the 60s-70s during the day. SMDH.
If you can currently feel my pain and you wish that you had a bit of snow around to get into the holiday season spirit, there are plenty of ASMR videos on YouTube that mimic snowstorms (like these here, here, and here) for you and your bae to cuddle up and listen or, umm, do other stuff to.
I mean, since science says that fall and winter are the best times for sex anyway (check out “Did You Know Fall & Winter Are The Best Times To Have Sex?”), why not do what you can to create as much of the ambiance as possible?
2. Paper Snowflakes (with Sexy Messages on Them)
Speaking of snow, when’s the last time that you’ve made some paper snowflakes? As a child, you may have created them for decoration. Now that you’re grown, though, put a bit of a twist to them by writing sexy messages on the back — you know, things like your favorite sex memory with your partner, a fantasy that you’d like to explore, or what you enjoy most about your man as far as intimacy goes.
You can put the snowflakes in your partner’s briefcase, underneath their pillow, or even hang them over your bed. If you’ve forgotten how to make them, no problem; click here for some instructions.
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3. Portable Fireplaces (or Flameless LED Candles)
Last year, I purchased something that I think is too cute for a friend of mine: tiny reusable bonfires. If you don’t happen to have a fireplace in your home, on some levels, they are the next best thing because they can create a romantic mood on a smaller level. I especially like tabletop firepits (like this one here) and even portable mid-century LED fireplaces (like this one here). Or, if you want something a bit larger, there are indoor tabletop fireplaces that are smokeless and odorless (like this one here).
Speaking of fires, if you and your partner plan on some R&B (meaning all night long) sex, I’d feel better if you went with some LED candles or something. You can put dozens of them all over your bedroom, have sex, fall asleep, and not have to worry about them one bit.
4. DIY Sex Gratitude Journal
How fitting is it that writer William Arthur Ward once said, “Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it?" Since Thanksgiving is the holiday when all are encouraged to express thanks for what they are truly grateful for, purchase a fresh journal, decorate it, and then fill it with things about intimacy with your man that truly moves you.
Then, read some of the entries out loud to him. Learning how to incorporate all five senses (in this case, hearing) into sexual activity (check out “How To Incorporate All Five Senses To Have The Best Sex Ever”) is how to make the experiences better than they’ve ever been.
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5. Homemade Candied Pecans
Pecan pie is pretty popular around this time of year. Well, did you know that pecans are considered to be aphrodisiacs? The main reason is that they are a fairly good source of zinc and zinc increases blood circulation, boosts your libido, and can even help with erectile dysfunction (if that’s something that your partner happens to deal with). So, why not curl up and snack on some homemade candied pecans (easy recipe here) while watching a movie or listening to some holiday music together? You never know how delicious the night may turn out to be because of it. Literally.
6. Cranberry (or Gingerbread) Syrup
A few years ago, I penned an article for the platform entitled, “12 'Sex Condiments' That Can Make Coitus Even More...Delicious.” In it, I shouted out chocolate syrup; however, today, I’m gonna go with something that is a little less…predictable. Chile, we already know that cranberry sauce is gonna be sitting on somebody’s Thanksgiving table, and there’s a pretty good chance that a gingerbread house (or at least some gingersnaps) is going to be available over Christmas, so why not pick up some cranberry or gingerbread syrup?
Since cranberries and ginger are both considered to be aphrodisiacs, it can be a super sexy move to dab a bit of syrup on some of your favorite sex pressure points (and his).
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7. A Lil' “Sex Christmas Tree”
Whether you plan on putting a (real, right?) Christmas tree in your living room or not, again, in the spirit of the holiday, get a small artificial one for a nightstand or the top of your dresser in your bedroom. Then you can hang a few sex-related items like flavored condoms, Santa hat nipple pasties, sex position ornaments, edible penis wraps, and picture strips — and whatever else your freaky lil’ mind can think of!
8. Edible Bows
Red velvet lingerie is definitely a nice touch during the holiday season. And although whether men prefer lingerie or nudity is really up to which guy you ask, I can’t think of one who is gonna have a problem with you wrapping your birthday suit up in a bow — especially if it’s an edible one. Yep, I actually came across a YouTube video (here) that walks you through how to make one of those. And although it’s not something that you can do in 10 minutes or less, I do think the end result will make it far worth the time investment. Don’t you?
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9. Pumpkin-Flavored Whipped Cream
Another sex condiment that I shared in the article that I referred to earlier is whipped cream. Since pumpkins are currently in season, acknowledge them by bringing some pumpkin-flavored whipped cream into the mix. You can always purchase the kind that’s already made (like this brand here), or you can even make a batch of your own (via a recipe like this here). That way, you can customize how sweet and thick you want the cream to be in order to stand up to your…plans. #wink
10. Bourbon Eggnog
Eggnog is definitely a signature holiday drink, and a few years back, I shouted it out in the article “12 Traditional Christmas Items That Are Low-Key Aphrodisiacs Too.” Why? Well, the vanilla, honey, and nutmeg that’s in it are all considered to be aphrodisiacs. If you add a bit of bourbon (which is a type of whiskey) to it, that can help to calm your nerves, which can ultimately make climaxing so much easier to do. A recipe for homemade bourbon eggnog is right here.
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11. Peppermint Chocolate Bath Bombs
Peppermint and chocolate will also be in abundance around the holidays, and, as life would have it, they are considered to be aphrodisiacs,too. So, whether you plan on soaking in the bath to prepare for what the night has to offer or you and your boo thang are going to hang out in the tub together (even better!), why not throw a few DIY peppermint chocolate bath bombs (recipe here) in there? The scent alone will make you want to turn each other into your desserts after you get up outta there.
12. Sexy Homemade Holiday Lip Balm
Even though I am well aware of the fact that some people hate to kiss (check out “Umm, What's Up With These People Who Hate Kissing?”), I also know that science says that kissing can help you find your ideal partner, and it can definitely make your sexual experiences better (check out “Wanna Climax More? KISS MORE.”). And although things like shea butter and batana oil (a personal favorite of mine) can give you some super smooth lips (after exfoliating them, of course), kissing will be even more scrumptious if you’ve got some flavored lip balm on.
A peppermint lip balm recipe is here (add a bit of Stevia, honey, or date sugar for flavoring), a chocolate lip balm recipe is here, and a vanilla lip balm recipe is here. Your man won’t be able to get enough of you — all holiday season long! ‘Tis the season, chile.
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