Quantcast
RELATED

Model, entrepreneur, and humanitarian Sabrina Dhowre Elba is opening up about the importance of preserving her identity following her marriage to actor Idris Elba.

The pair has been together since 2017 following a chance encounter at a jazz club in Vancouver. At the time, Idris was in town filming Mountain Between Us and decided to check out the club while Sabrina was out celebrating a friend's birthday.


That same year, Idris and Sabrina made their debut as a couple by attending a film premiere. As their bond progressed, Idris and Sabrina would showcase more about their lives by going to more events, publicly speaking about one another, and sharing intimate moments on social media.

In 2019, the couple tied the knot in Morocco. Over the years, in addition to their romantic relationship, Idris and Sabrina have professionally collaborated on several projects, including their genderless skincare brand S'Able Labs, their Coupledom podcast, and their humanitarian work.

During a recent interview with The Breakpodcast, Sabrina revealed why she felt it was essential to maintain her identity even after marrying a high-profile celebrity and the struggles she faced during that process.

Sabrina Elba On Maintaining Her Identity After Marrying Idris

In the July discussion, the 35-year-old explained it was important for her to preserve her identity because she wanted to be seen as an equal regardless of being married to Idris.

"It was really important to me to maintain my own identity," she said. "Sometimes that can be hard when someone else's identity is so strong and so big, all the reasons why I love him for, his massive personality."

Further into the interview, Sabrina claimed that although she tried numerous ways to maintain her identity and her independence by speaking up about specific issues that were important to her and sharing various social media posts, it wasn't well received by some people.

"I'm still going through this discovery. I don't want to lose that and not be afraid to explore what that is because I heard early on, 'Why are you talking? You've just married someone [famous].' Or 'Why are you on [social media] posting?'" she stated while mentioning what inspired her to stand her ground.

"I was like, okay, let's not silence someone's voice. My mom always told me the most important thing you have in this world is your voice. I was like, I'm still going to talk about whatever I want to talk about. If I want to post a pair of shoes, I'm still going to post a pair of shoes. I'm not going to change my identity."

Sabrina On Her Past Struggles

When asked about the negative comments she’s received, Sabrina disclosed that it wasn't necessarily the remarks that rubbed her the wrong way but rather people's attitude toward her when she would talk about certain things and post online.

"It was almost the attitude towards me of there's no reason that you should be speaking up or talking about things you care about because you're only here because of him," she stated. "I remember thinking, you know what, that's your prerogative because I'm still going to say, talk, and be whoever I want to be."

Despite the adverse reaction, Sabrina added that none of this made sense to her because she grew up in an African household where women could express themselves. However, with Idris' help and guidance, Sabrina revealed she found her voice while navigating through the storm.

"It didn't make sense to me because I grew up with such a strong woman. My mom was a strong African woman, no one would have taken that from her," she said. "I thought, let me just figure out what I want to say and who I am. I was going through this exploration, and Idris [was] just hand-holding because he's like really good at that. I feel like I've come now to a place where I can say I'm quite proud of who I've developed into over the past couple of years. "

Sabrina wrapped up her statement by saying she is now content with the person she has become and what she stands for.

"I maybe couldn't have said that like four years ago, maybe I was still going through that kind of journey. But now I feel quite settled and in a groove and quite good about who I am and the things that I have been able to speak on. That feels refreshing," she stated.

Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.

Feature image by Victor Boyko/Getty Images for Global Citizen

 

RELATED

 
ALSO ON XONECOLE
'We Had To Heal To Love': Taja Simpson And Ryan Easter’s Journey To Lasting Love

How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.

One of my favorite things about interviewing married couples and hearing their diverse “How We Met” stories is the way they affirm true love and integral beliefs. One principle that I wholeheartedly believe is that one must truly know and love oneself before effectively doing it for another human being, and Taja Simpson and Ryan Easter’s story affirms this.

KEEP READINGShow less
The One Thing That Leads To Happy Relationships Is Actually A Struggle For Many

Recently, while doing an interview for my latest “book child,” someone asked me to share what I found to be a constant issue within long-term relationships. One of the first things that came to my mind: “It’s really fascinating how many people will end a relationship for not receiving what they haven’t even been great at giving themselves.”

Y’all, I will forever-and-a-day say that if you don’t want someone else to hold you accountable (oftentimes in some very uncomfortable and unpredictable ways) and/or you don’t want someone to put an allegorical mirror in your face to reveal who you really are, to yourself, stay single.

KEEP READINGShow less
LATEST POSTS