As Told To is a recurring segment on xoNecole where real women are given a platform to tell their stories in first-person narrative as told to a writer.
This is Roberta Moradfar's story, as told to Charmin Michelle.
I am Santa Monica's favorite face sculptor.
And I love and enjoy every aspect of what I do.
My company is EFFACÈ Aesthetics. We specialize in expert facial aesthetics and beauty and have managed to build a solid business model around what we're most passionate about.
To put it blatantly, I am here to give my sistas the best botox, lip injections, fillers, or a variety of other premium services, to anyone looking to revitalize and refresh—allowing you to glowingly live your best wrinkle-free life.
In December 2019, I had the grand opening of my first full-service medical spa, and it was the most rewarding moment of my career. We have amazing aestheticians that have become a family of bomb women looking to serve you facial rejuvenation on a diamond-encrusted platter.
It takes years to achieve what we have, lots of practice, and ongoing education to keep up with the latest and greatest in aesthetics. And with lots of hard work, my platform is super prideful of our trained artistic eye and thorough comprehension of facial anatomy (blood vessels, nerves, and muscles' locations and functions), all the while having the motor skills to be able to smoothly, yet gently, achieve desired results.
My journey to where I am today, as with all entrepreneurs, was anything but easy.
But struggling with acne since the age of 14 and knowing the psychological effects it can have on any young man or woman, is why I was determined to become invested in skincare. Most importantly: ethnic skincare.
Changing Perceptions & Erasing The Stigmas
I started out as an ICU nurse in New Jersey when I was 22 years old and transitioned into laser and aesthetics just a few years after moving to Los Angeles at 25. I was hired at a well-known laser and aesthetics company based in Los Angeles. I had always loved beauty and skincare, but here, I began to really understand the science of medical grade cosmetic products and treatments. It helped me realize that all the expensive products that I would buy in department stores were just that: expensive products.
For many years, plastic surgery and aesthetics were always geared towards a rich, upper class society. And we were made to believe it's a "white thing" to get your lips and Botox done. There seems to be a lack of trust regarding products and services that claim to be safe for all skin types.
And ladies, why is this? Because graceful aging and rejuvenation is for us too!
Social media has been instrumental in showing and proving that. Celebrities, reality stars, and social media influencers have openly documented their aesthetic journeys, and sharing procedures that help keep their appearances fresh, regardless of race, but especially within the black community. This has influenced the younger generation to become much more open-minded to the idea of aesthetics, no matter ethnicity, and thus encapsulating what I preach every day.
As a result, we have seen an increase in that demographic, where they have been getting procedures like preventative Botox as well as minor enhancements using fillers.
I was actually so happy to see Deion Sanders become the first male spokesperson for Botox—or as I like to call it for the fellas, "Brotox". I especially think it was cool because not only is he promoting aesthetics services for men, but he's also a black high-profile athlete. I believe he has really sparked the interest of men who fear being "feminine" for wanting to follow through on anti-aging procedures.
Maybe She's Born With It, Maybe It's My Work
One of the most frequent components of my line of work, is constant questioning as to which service would be best to those of us who are hesitant to move forward with any face sculpting procedures.
And in response, my comprehensive list of misconceptions vs. benefits came into fruition:
Botox
Misconceptions: People often mistake full-looking lips as having "Botox in their lips" (that would be filler). Another misconception is that Botox makes you look unnatural.
Importance: Botox is a great preventative intervention to premature aging when done conservatively.
Fillers
Misconceptions: inserting a syringe in the lips will give you a “duck" look, or you'll look like the cat lady if you continue getting fillers. Another common misconception is that once you start getting Botox and fillers, it'll look worse once you stop so you're forced to continue.
Importance: Getting fillers usually helps you look more rejuvenated and they often go well when combined with Botox and other non-invasive treatments such as chemical peels or laser resurfacing.
Skin Treatments
Misconceptions: You'll appear to have bleached your skin if you get a peel. Or that chemical peels leave you with burns or that it hurts. Another one is that only one session of a laser treatment is needed for desired results.
Importance: Everyone needs to do at least one peel a year to help stimulate skin cell turnover—you'll have baby butt skin.
Laser Hair Removal
Misconceptions: You have to be a certain skin tone for this procedure, or that you can't have a dark complexion. Another one is that only a few sessions is needed for permanent hair removal. A really common one is that it hurts!
Importance: Laser hair removal is—hands down—a lifesaver! Everyone that has unwanted hair needs to do it!
A Journey Continued
Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I take in a few deep breaths and feed myself positive affirmations. I then follow that up with a little prayer.
Works every time.
I also try to routinely schedule myself for deep tissue massages. Because I have strange body mechanics while injecting, my neck, upper back and shoulders need adjusting from time to time, and I do occasionally see a chiropractor for that as well. I enjoy a good dinner with some cocktails with girlfriends, especially when we haven't had a moment to catch up on what's new in our lives.
I enjoy walks every other day, and my fiancé and I either do yoga together, or he swims laps in the pool for cardio as I watch on drinking a green juice.
Lastly, I read. I love self-care books and right now I'm reading Marie Kondo's The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, and realizing during COVID-19 how all of our "things" really don't matter. So, I think after reading this book, trips to HomeGoods and Marshalls will be a wrap.
—
Fortunately, for my team and I, we haven't seen any affects from our current state of this pandemic, and business is actually booming thanks to our online beauty products—and social media. While most companies are losing money, we have been doing the exact opposite, which we don't take for granted.
As for what's next, we're introducing a team of highly-skilled physicians at EFFACÉ that will add services to our brand. We'll also be bringing on an in-house psychiatrist on weekends that specializes in depression IV therapy (which has been proven to be more effective and safer than medications).
But most importantly, we're going to continue to serve and encourage women—and men—to have the audacity to be fearless in feeling beautiful again.
And we'll do so one chemical peel, laser hair removal session, and Botox injection at a time.
To continue to follow Roberta's journey, you can find her on Instagram at @effacebyroberta.
RELATED
Check out the following 15 things that you can do (five per category), beauty-wise, to embrace all that spring has in store — things that will have you out here looking even more radiant than you already do!
Hair
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1. Clarify your hair. Sweat, dead skin cells, product build-up, minerals in your water, excessive sebum, whatever falls into your hair when you’re outdoors (like pollen) — all of these things play a significant role in why it’s important to clarify your hair from time to time and clarifying is simply about using things that will help to get rid of the residue that’s on your strands. Clarifying is actually why I don’t cosign with people who say that you should NEVER use sulfate shampoos; I just believe that you should ONLY use them to clarify your locks (so long as they aren’t too harsh on your hair).
So, what are some signs that your hair needs clarifying?
If your hair feels oily or sticky; if it’s hard for it to hold a style; if your scalp is itchy or irritated; if you notice that your hair is shedding more than it should (which is 50-100 strands a day); if your hair is dull and/or (bonus) if you are about to color-treat your hair (because build-up will make it difficult for the color to “take”). You can clarify your tresses with a clarifying shampoo (check out a list here). Or, if you’d prefer to take the all-natural route, apple cider vinegar, baking soda, bentonite clay, and even Aloe vera are awesome options (click on each of the words to learn why and how to apply them in this way).
2. Exfoliate your scalp. Honestly, the main way that I know it is time for me to wash my hair is when my scalp tells me so. When it’s itchy and/or flaking, that’s my cue. Oftentimes, what I will do is either provide my scalp with a good rinse (I really like TPH BY TARAJI Master Cleanse Scalp Treatment) or a scalp exfoliant. That’s because, just like your hair can experience residue, your scalp can as well (especially when it comes to dead skin cells and product build-up). Plus, a scalp that isn’t exfoliated can end up having clogged hair follicles which can ultimately mess with your hair growth.
If you want to go the exfoliant route, there are scalp scrubs that you can buy. You can also crush some aspirin up, add a bit of water to it, and rub it on your scalp, create a brown sugar and oatmeal scalp scrub or you can check out some other recipes here.
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3. Address those ends. It can’t be said enough that, if you’re trying to grow out your hair, it doesn’t matter how much you take care of the roots of your hair if you’re neglecting your ends in the process. In fact, a huge part of the reason why a lot of people don’t end up reaching their hair (length) goals is because their locks end up breaking off just about as fast as their hair grows from their scalp. One way to avoid this from happening is to “baby” the entire mess out of your ends — and y’all, a product that I’ve been using that helps me to do this oh so very well is Amika Starfruit Oil. Listen, stuff that has worked for me personally, I do my best to shout-out and this product right here? It’s the truth! It’s a lightweight oil that feels kind of like a serum that really does create shine, lessen frizz and help to make your hair feel so much stronger — including your ends. Now, it ain’t cheap; still, a little bit goes a long way which makes it worth the expense (at least it does to me). Anyway, whether it’s getting a trim, dusting your ends (removing split ends and fairy knots on your own) or just giving your ends some much needed TLC, this would be the time to do it…especially so.
4. Toss out expired hair products. Be honest with me and yourself — you know you’ve got some hair products that should’ve gone on to glory a long time ago, simply because the lettering is faded and/or you really can’t remember when you purchased it (check out “Resolving To Kick Your Product Junkie Habit? Here's Your Game Plan For 2024.”). I’ll be real with you, unfortunately, most hair products don’t come with an expiration date; however, a good rule of thumb to follow is if your products change color, smell, or texture, it’s probably time to toss ‘em out.
And when it comes to shampoos and conditioners specifically, many experts say that around six months is when it’s time to get some new stuff. Oh and also, please wash your brushes, combs and clean out the teeth of your hair dryers, and thoroughly wipe off your flat irons. You’d be amazed how much gunk can get caught up in all of those things. #yuck
5. Replenish your collection with lighter water-based ones. Since warmer weather tends to lead to hair that has more oil and residue than during the cooler months, if you’re going to buy some new hair products make sure that they contain less oils and butters and more water instead. The reason why is because the last thing that you want is for it to be a nice spring-like day with the wind blowing and yet your hair doesn’t move one bit because it’s so weighed down by all of your hair products. If you’d like a few recommendations of what to get for this season, check out BuzzFeed’s “27 Products That’ll Take Your Hair From Winter Drab To Spring Fab.”
Skin
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1. Get a professional facial. It’s pretty common that, as it heats up outside, you may want to wear less make-up — at least during the daytime hours because between the sweat and everything? It can just be easier to take the “less is more” approach. If that is exactly how you roll (or you do like make-up and you would like for it to go on more smoothly), consider getting a professional facial as soon as possible. I’m good for getting a back facial at the turn of every season and there is nothing like having a professional esthetician get all up in your skin and treat issues in ways that you simply can’t (because you haven’t been trained to).
When it comes to your face, professional facials are bomb because they can deeply cleanse, exfoliate, hydrate, improve the texture, and treat trouble areas all at the same time. I promise you, after getting a facial from someone who really knows what they are doing, your skin will glow on a completely different level!
2. Clean all of your make-up tools. Chile, guess how often the average American changes their sheets (SMDH): every 24 days…that’s damn near once a month. Now guess how often you’re supposed to do it: no less than once a week and actually every 2-4 days if you have pets or allergies. If most folks aren’t doing this, I can only imagine how few are cleaning their makeup brushes, etc. And how often should you do that? Every 7-10 days (more often than that, if you can). And although you shouldn’t wait for spring to do this, this is just a reminder to set aside a day to clean everything at once.
For tips on how to properly clean your brushes, check out the YouTube channel ItsMyRayeRaye’s post here. Tips on how to clean cosmetic sponges? Roxslayofficial’s page can help you out here. And if you tend to put your brushes and sponges in a drawer in your bathroom, invest in a nice vase for your brushes or something like a magnetic brush organizer. As far as your sponges go, a cute soap dish that has holes in it or an egg case will work.
3. Look for skincare products that contain antioxidants and ceramides. Since there’s a pretty good chance that you’ll be out in the sun more often, you need to make sure that your skin is protected from the damage that free radicals, air pollution, and UV rays can do. One way to do this is by looking for skincare products that are packed with antioxidants. Ones that immediately come to mind include vitamin C extract, and vitamin E oil as well as products that have niacinamide (vitamin B6) and polyphenols listed on the label.
Something else to look for is skin products that contain ceramides;they are lipids that easily makeup 50 percent of the outer layer of your skin. When you apply skincare items that contain them, those ceramides help to hydrate your skin, protect the barrier, and slow down the signs of aging. I use ceramides on my neck at night and baby, no regrets. Not a damn one.
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4. Go without make-up more often. Whenever someone tells me that I don’t look my age, I thank genetics and the fact that I didn’t start wearing make-up (other than mascara and lipstick which is pretty much how I get down now) until I was well into my 20s. There is no way around the fact that prolonged cosmetic use (especially when it comes to certain ingredients), yes, can speed up the aging process of your skin. It can also lead to breakouts; cause your pores to appear larger than they actually are; throw off the pH balance of your skin; create the appearance of fine lines, and it can weaken your skin’s barrier. That’s why it’s a good idea to give your skin a break by going make-up-free sometimes.
Since spring cleaning is the theme, focus more on skincare than cosmetics so that, by the time the summer season arises, if you go swimming, you don’t have to worry about going au naturel because your natural skin will be so on-point on its own (check out “I've Been Doing At-Home Chemical Peels. Here Are The Pros And Cons.,” “Why Your Skin, Hair, And Nails Need Hyaluronic Acid Like...Yesterday” and “These 12 Things Will Make Your Skin Glow All Of The Time” for some prepping tips).
5. Don’t forget about sunscreen. BLACK WOMEN NEED SUNSCREEN — and yes, I am yelling it because I know far too many of us who were told that because our skin is so beautifully melanated, sunscreen isn’t really necessary. The lies you tell. Problem is, when you read articles like Healthline’s “The Sunscreen Gap: Do Black People Need Sunscreen?” you’ll notice that — surprise, surprise, and totally insert my sarcasm here — some medical professionals don’t emphasize the importance of us using sunscreen which causes some of us not to prioritize it.
However, the reality is that UV rays can damage our skin just like anyone else's, not to mention that sun drama can also lead to things like hyperpigmentation. So, if you’ve never used sunscreen before, make this the year that you absolutely do. Some of the best sunscreens for our skin are located here, here, and here.
Nails
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1. Opt for a shorter length. Not to brag but I actually have some really pretty hands and nails. That’s why, before the pandemic, I was in the nail shop all of the time; however, once we went into lockdown, I decided to keep my nails low and I haven’t really grown them out since. Something about watching all of those videos about how many germs get trapped up in there just creeped me out, chile.
Anyway, since it’s spring and you’ll be outdoors, pollen is flying everywhere and you may be doing things (like outdoor sports) that require you to use your hands in a more active way if your nails are currently on the longer side right now, you might want to go with a shorter length. Not only is it hygienic and practical, from what I’ve seen (here, here, and here), but it’s shorter nails that are also trending right through here too.
2. Do a deep hand and foot soak. While certain — cough, cough — folks are out here debating about how often you should wash your feet (the things that have tons of sweat glands and literally spend most of their time on the floor or ground), I’m encouraging you to go above and beyond and do some regular foot (and hand) soaking. They’re relaxing. They exfoliate your skin. They can also help to deeply hydrate your skin. They increase blood circulation. They also help your hands and feet to look youthful for a longer period of time.
Although there are a variety of different hand (here) and foot (here) recipes to choose from, one of my faves is to soak in an herbal tea blend — one that also has some Epsom salt and coconut milk in it. Chamomile tea can help to soothe you. Sage contains medicinal properties. Hibiscus can help to even out your skin tone. Epsom salt is great because it also helps to exfoliate and hydrate. Coconut milk is awesome because it deeply moisturizes, stimulates the production of collagen and it also exfoliates too. Soaking your hands and feet for about 30-45 minutes can make your skin’s texture feel totally different. Try it and see!
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3. Pamper your cuticles with an essential oil blend. The base of your fingernails and toenails is your nail bed and right underneath those are your cuticles; the purpose of your cuticles is to keep bacteria from infecting your new nails as they grow out from your nail bed. Honestly, it wasn’t until I started getting hangnails that I started to pay my cuticles some real attention (in between professional manicures). I was getting them because my cuticles were dry which means that I was neglecting them. Now, I’m on top of that because hangnails are ANNOYING (and sometimes even painful).
I care for my cuticles by keeping my cuticles trimmed, pushing them back and making sure that they are well moisturized. Although there are cuticle creams that you can buy, I prefer to apply a blend of tea tree oil (it kills bacteria and fungus), geranium oil (it has astringent and anti-inflammatory properties), and avocado oil which deeply moisturizes. It makes my cuticles feel and look great.
4. Go without polish for a while. Listen, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna do, it’s get a pedicure — usually twice a month. I’m so serious about it that, even the day that my house literally blew up a few years ago (check out “My House Burned Up. Three Days Before Christmas. What It Taught Me.”), after I assessed the damage (95 percent of my stuff was gone) and talked to the fire marshal about what caused it (my HVAC), I went on to my nail appointment (dead serious). Polished toes always make me feel better and you can’t steal my joy. That’s why I hate it when my nail tech will tell me that it’s time to take a polish break sometimes.
Still, I heed the advice because, when your fingernails and toenails aren’t given the opportunity to breathe, that can lead to fungal and bacterial growth, weaker nails, dry nails, permanently stained nails, and all sorts of other drama. Ideally, since your toenails especially are covered up more in the fall and winter months, that would be the most ideal time to follow through with this particular suggestion. If you didn’t do that, though. Give your nails a month or so without any polish over the next few weeks. It might feel rough at first but it’s worth it in the long run.
5. Return to polish with lighter hues. When it comes to nail polish hues, I tend to lean into the darker ones. Spring isn’t really the time for that, though. Yeah, if ever there is a time to go with some Easter egg colors, the spring season would be it. And as far as spring color trends for this year go, you’re super stylish if you go with light neutrals, bright green, or pearly shades — or you can get super creative via InStyle’s “20 April Nail Ideas to Freshen Up Your Manicure.”
And speaking of polish (and spring cleaning), I’m pretty sure you’ve got some old bottles that need to go. For the most part, their shelf life is between 12-24 months. If it’s been longer than that, let them babies go. It’s spring. Time for new things, sis. NEW THINGS!
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