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On Being ‘Demure,’ The Internet Term Empowering Us To Be More Mindful & Measured

In a world that’s seemingly losing all of its cool, it’s time to be more demure. And we have TikTok creator Jools Lebron to thank for that. Beauty influencer @joolieannie singlehandedly breathed new life into our social lexicon with a phrase that embodies mindfulness with a “cutesy” lifestyle to match.


In her now mega-viral video posted on Aug. 2, Jools shared the final results of her makeup look stating, “You see how I do my makeup for work? Very demure. Very mindful.” Adding, “See how I look very presentable? The way I came to the interview is the way I go to the job… I’m very modest, I’m very mindful,” ushering us into our demure era.

@joolieannie

#fyp #demure

The internet instantly clung to the phrase for its situationally malleable tone and ability to capture the essence of nuanced interactions. What you wear to work, how you do your makeup, how you engage in conversations, and how you handle minor conflicts all offer an opportunity to exhibit a demure, mindful approach that many are now adopting.

If you’re wondering where the word has been hiding all this time, look no further than the Merriam-Webster dictionary. By definition, demure means to be “affectedly modest, reserved, or serious,” however, Jools’ spin on the term offers a fresh perspective. Rather than merely denoting modesty, “demure” leads with the intention to embody quiet confidence and embrace a playful yet thoughtful approach to your daily life.

This revival of demure is more than just a linguistic trend; it's a reflection of internet culture’s playful yet powerful role in shaping our language.

Social platforms like TikTok have become breeding grounds for new expressions, where creators are able to redefine words and concepts with a single post. From 'therapy-speak' that has popularized words like gaslighting, boundaries, and toxicity, to our collective fascination with decoding our attachment styles, and diagnosing ourselves and others with terms like narcissists and ADHD.

The internet is no stranger to turning complex concepts and terminologies into everyday vernacular. However, the resurgence of "demure" in this context is not just about reviving an old-fashioned term — it's about embracing a new, mindful way of being that contrasts with the overstimulating nature of our current culture.

“Demurity” reflects a growing desire for balance, subtlety, and intentionality in how we present ourselves to the world and invites us to consider how we interact with the world with greater intention.

To be mindful is to be considerate. To be cutesy is to be authentically yourself. To be demure is to be measured. In other words, "I don't do too much, I do just enough. I don't go overboard, I don't go underboard" as Lebron put it in a recent video. "I'm not the basement, I'm not the attic. I'm where you live. I'm very demure."

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Featured image by Yana Iskayeva/Getty Images

 

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