![Quantcast](http://pixel.quantserve.com/pixel/p-GS-HF4BKvzCmv.gif)
![Normani Talks Letting Go Of The Need To Be Perfect & The Heartbreak Behind "Fair"](https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yOTYxMzk2Ni9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTc1NjE1MTc2N30.-EUgQC1G5NAaVhQ2m2WKzd99iXRnqq3b7UO_L-PPz9I/img.jpg?width=1200&height=600&quality=90&coordinates=0%2C286%2C0%2C3125)
Normani Talks Letting Go Of The Need To Be Perfect & The Heartbreak Behind "Fair"
Normani has been in the music industry since she was a teenager as a part of the girl group Fifth Harmony. But since their split, the 25-year-old singer has been working hard to prove that she can make it as a solo act.
She released “Motivation” in 2019 with a memorable video that paid tribute to her favorite artists growing up and in that same year she teamed up with Sam Smith for “Dancing with a Stranger.” In 2021, she released the head-bobbing slow jam “Wild Side” featuring Cardi B and shut down the 2021 VMA’s with an incredible performance.
Normani has received a lot of support from people who want to see her win but she is also faced with doubters who question her authenticity as she seems to be projecting an image and not her real self. However, that narrative is changing thanks to her new song “Fair.” Since its debut, “Fair” has earned a lot of praise from fans and artists alike such as her former collaborator Cardi B.
BEAUTIFUL …@Normani you look gorgeous and the song is soo good.Keep going ,keep working. https://t.co/srGojYiBVC
— Cardi B (@iamcardib) March 18, 2022
The song shows Normani’s vulnerable side and it gives fans a peek into the real person behind the artist. The multi-hyphenate sat down with Zane Lowe for Apple Music Radio and they discussed a variety of things such as the story behind “Fair,” letting go of perfection, and her new album being “the best music I’ve made thus far.”
On Being Vulnerable with “Fair”
“This record is another layer of who I am and my experiences and I feel like, I grew up in the public eye so you know it’s been very, very scary and very complicated. A sense of forcing myself into this idea of perfection to protect myself but this is the first time that I’m just free-falling in a sense and it’s scary. This is me being vulnerable and really captures a true and raw point in my experience that I wanted to share.”
On Making “Fair” While She was Experiencing Heartache
“What makes it so special, like I was saying, it captured me in the moment as I was experiencing in real-time. Like I was going through it emotionally. That day I wasn't sure if I could even really pick myself up to go to the studio. But ended up, and this was the result.”
She added, “And it’s therapy for me as much as it is for everyone else it’s for me. Putting this record out I didn’t know it was gonna be for me too.”
On Learning How to Let Go and be Herself
“Being 15 years old and not being able to be a traditional 15-year-old, teenagers make mistakes without getting reprimanded. I really think it took a toll on me in a large way. I guess having that experience so early and I think that I look up and I’m like, ‘damn you’re not even freeing yourself to just be.’ You have such a tight grip and not because I want to, but because I’ve always had to, which is a disservice to me and [my fans.]”
On the Need to Feel Validated
“I had to check myself. I think it was me and James Blake, we were having a conversation. We were just talking about just validation. I’ve never been one to need [applause] but you get used to it and when you don’t it’s like okay, maybe this isn’t—it doesn't feel as important.”
On Wanting to Be More Present
“I’m practicing gratitude too. Because it’s so easy to say and look at what everybody else is doing and what you’re not and then you’re constantly chasing after the next thing and the next thing and the next thing. With 'Motivation' I totally missed it. With 'Wild Side' I promised myself that I wouldn’t and I promised to be so, so present.”
On No Longer Being Hard on Herself
“I’m giving myself grace and I’m allowing myself to go through the process but also have room to grow. I’m sometimes like I wanna do everything, everything has to be—all the time, now, but I’ve never experienced what it was like to be a new artist for me.”
Normani: “Fair,” Moving On After Heartbreak, and Ghosting Zane’s Text | Apple Music
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Karwai Tang/Getty Images
This Black Woman-Owned Creative Agency Shows Us The Art Of Rebranding
Rebranding is an intricate process and very important to the success of businesses that want to change. However, before a business owner makes this decision, they should determine whether it's a rebrand or an evolution.
That's where people like Lola Adewuya come in. Lola is the founder and CEO of The Brand Doula, a brand development studio with a multidisciplinary approach to branding, social media, marketing, and design.
While an evolution is a natural progression that happens as businesses grow, a rebrand is a total change. Lola tells xoNecole, "A total rebrand is necessary when a business’s current reputation/what it’s known for is at odds with the business’s vision or direction.
"For example, if you’ve fundamentally changed what your product is and does, it’s likely that your brand is out of alignment with the business. Or, if you find your company is developing a reputation that doesn’t serve it, it might be time to pump the brakes and figure out what needs to change.
She continues, "Sometimes you’ll see companies (especially startups) announce a name change that comes with updated messaging, visuals, etc. That usually means their vision has changed or expanded, and their previous branding was too narrow/couldn’t encompass everything they planned to do."
Feature image courtesy
The Brand Doula was born in 2019, and its focus is on putting "the experiences, goals, and needs of women of color founders first," as well as brands with "culture-shifting missions."
According to Lola, culture-shifting is "the act of influencing dominant behavior, beliefs, or experiences in a community or group (ideally, for the better)."
"At The Brand Doula, we work with companies and leaders that set out to challenge the status quo in their industries and communities. They’re here to make an impact that sends ripples across the market," she says.
"We help the problem solvers of the world — the ones who aren't satisfied with 'this is how it's always been' and instead ask 'how could this be better?' Our clients build for impact, reimagining tools, systems, and ways of living to move cultures forward."
The Brand Doula has worked with many brands, including Too Collective, to assist with their collaboration with Selena Gomez's Rare Beauty and Balanced Black Girl for a "refresh," aka rebrand. For businesses looking to rebrand, Lola shares four essential steps.
1. Do an audit of your current brand experience — what’s still relevant and what needs to change? Reflect on why you’re doing the rebrand in the first place and what success would look like after relaunching.
2. Tackle the overall strategy first — before you start redesigning logos and websites, align on a new vision for your brand. How do you want your company to be positioned moving forward? Has your audience changed at all? Will your company have a fresh personality and voice?
3. Bring your audience along the journey — there’s no need to move in secret. Inviting your current audience into the journey can actually help them feel more connected to and invested in your story, enough to stick around as changes are being made.
4. Keep business moving — one of my biggest pet peeves is when companies take down their websites as soon as they have the idea to rebrand, then have a Coming Soon page up for months! You lose a lot of momentum and interest by doing that. If you’re still in business and generating income, continue to operate while you work on your rebrand behind the scenes. You don’t want to cut existing customers off out of the blue, and you also don’t want so much downtime that folks forget your business exists or start looking for other solutions.
While determining whether the rebrand was successful may take a few months, Lola says a clear sign that it is unsuccessful is negative feedback from your target audience. "Customers are typically more vocal about what they don’t like more than what they do like," she says.
But some good signs to look out for are improvements in engagement with your marketing, positive reviews, press and increase in retention, and overall feeling aligned with the new branding.
For more information about Lola and The Brand Doula, visit her website, thebranddoula.com.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image courtesy
Ever since I can remember, attending New York Fashion Week was a dream of mine. Sitting in the front row at the shows, getting snapped up by the photogs, being featured on some of my favorite platforms, and showing up as THAT GWORL meant everything to me. I went to my first NYFW in 2014 and I legit felt like I was living in a dream. I got my first invite to a show at Lincoln Center, and it felt like I was the Black Carrie Bradshaw.
Over the years, things started shifting for me. The way I viewed this coveted series of events began affecting my mental health. While I thought I had a strong sense of self, fashion week had me wondering who I was and if I was worthy.
The hardest truth: it’s draining. Schedules are packed from dawn to dusk with endless engagements—you’re constantly stressing over what to wear, how you’ll come across in photos and on social media, and whether you’ll even make it into the shows.
The Dream vs Reality
Courtesy
In 2018, I penned an essay sharinghow New York Fashion Week made me doubt myself. Then, I was living in Denver, traveling to the Big Apple to partake in the fashion week festivities. I had been excited about becoming one of the street style icons photographers captured, but when I arrived at my first show of the season at Industria, I noticed a disheartening trend. Photographers mostly focused on white and Asian women, often overlooking Black women. As I entered the show, I felt even more intimidated, questioning my worth and wondering if I wasn’t good enough for the front row.
While I was still trying to figure out my place in the space, there was still a beauty behind the chaos. B.C., before COVID-19, the atmosphere was real and somewhat inclusive. Within the dynamic landscape of social media, TikTok content creators have become highly valued assets, triggering a ripple effect of significant changes and transformations.
Since I am such a huge empath, I feel all the things and intensely. A year ago, I wrote, “This fashion week definitely hit different for me. It felt heavier and not as fun as it used to be. One day, once I’ve processed everything with my therapist, I’ll be able to talk about the psychological Olympics that overwhelm me, from what to wear to not being accepted by certain groups — it’s just so much. And we don’t talk about what it does to your mental. I’m definitely living in the BOTH/AND space — it felt grueling, and I felt blessed.”
I’m ready to talk about it now. In reality, the fashion industry is not for the faint of heart. Although I cherish the sense of community and sisterhood I have built, there are moments when loneliness creeps in. From panic attacks to feeling like you’re having a perpetual hangover, it’s just so stressful.
Someone gets to decide whether you’re worthy of partaking in a show or party without actually knowing you. That kind of judgment does damage to your self-esteem. As time passes, I find myself with limited patience for individuals who harbor uncertainties about my identity and contributions.
In the realm of fashion week, an exclusive atmosphere exists, reminiscent of the "mean girls" clique. Some individuals derive pleasure from denying others the opportunity to join their circle, both metaphorically and physically. And now, this thing that used to bring me joy has become a reminder of what I haven’t achieved even though my friends and family look at me, and it appears that I am living my best life.
Then, there’s the absence of inclusivity, particularly in terms of body diversity, has left a lasting impression on me as the reflection of women who look like me, a size 14, dwindle every season.. The 2020 of it all had the brands wanting to check the boxes and “do it for the culture.” But now, four years later, the promises of inclusion have worn off, and the runways and presentations are back to their white-washed-size-4 ways.
A New Perspective
Courtesy
Now, as a resident of Brooklyn, I've made a conscious decision this season to experience New York Fashion Week on my terms. This means prioritizing events and shows that genuinely resonate with me and align with my values. No more going to events to be seen — I am more concerned about how my life feels than what it looks like to others. NYFW can often be overwhelming with its fast-paced schedule and plethora of options, but I'm choosing to approach it mindfully.
No more 12-hour days where I don’t eat and spend $300 on Ubers.Rather than feeling pressured to attend every event or show, I'm focusing on curating a personalized experience. I'm taking the time to research designers and brands whose ethos and aesthetics align with my own. This allows me to connect with the creative vision behind the collections and appreciate the artistry and craftsmanship that goes into each design.
By attending shows that speak to me, I'm not only supporting the designers I admire but also immersing myself in a creative environment that inspires and invigorates me. I'm able to engage with like-minded individuals, exchange ideas, and gain fresh perspectives on fashion as the amazing art form I have always loved it to be.
For me, NYFW is about more than just seeing the latest trends. It's an opportunity to immerse myself in a vibrant community of creatives and celebrate the transformative power of fashion. By attending events that fill me up, I'm not only experiencing the spectacle of NYFW but also enriching my creative journey.
See how I take care of my mental health — very cute, very demure, very mindful.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image courtesy