Sex can be very different things for different people, and believe it or not, but it doesn't have to begin or end with penetration in order to be considered sex. Intercourse is often a defining principle for our language around sex, but there are some uncharted waters we should all look to discover, and that is the wonderful world of outercourse. Which then segues us into the much-needed conversation of non-penetrative sex positions.
While having someone be inside of you (or the reverse) can seem like the most physically intimate act one can experience, outercourse in non-penetrative sex can emphasize intimacy on another level. Pleasure can be felt and highlighted on parts of the body that might only receive attention during foreplay. Outercourse serves as a reminder to treat the appetizer like the entree it truly is, and the end result can be transformative to how we see and experience sexual pleasure.
Ready to take your love-making to new levels of intimacy? Below are four non-penetrative sex positions to try tonight.
Missionary
Missionary is an old-faithful when it comes to tried and true sex positions. Similar to the missionary position, this variation of the intercourse version, the receiving partner will lay on their back and the giving partner will position themselves on top of them. Instead of penetration being involved, the giving partner will grind against the receiving partner so that the focal point is arousal through clitoral stimulation, rubbing, kissing, and touching.
Pretzel Dip
A perfect position for clitoral and nipple stimulation, the Pretzel Dip position involves the receiving partner sitting back with their legs spread. While propped up on their knees, the giving partner will play with the receiving partner's clit. During this action, they can intensify things even further by upping the ante with kissing and nipple play with either the other's free hands or mouth. The giving and receiving partners can take turns and incorporate actions like kissing, oral sex, mutual masturbation, and/or nipple stimulation.
The Chairman
The Chairman sex position involves the receiving partner utilizing the giving partner as a "seat" so to speak as they grind their way to ecstasy. The receiving partner will straddle the partner's legs while faced away, allowing the giving partner to be able to stimulate their clit as they receiving partner grinds against them. They also have freedom to grab breasts, play with nipples, kiss their partner's neck and back, as well as bring in a sex toy or two.
Magic Mountain
Mutual masturbation is the name of the game when it comes to the Magic Mountain position. In order to do this position, both partners must sit down facing each other with their legs bent. Sit close enough so that if either partner feels like reaching out to touch the other, they can.
Both partners will engage in self-pleasure while watching the other, their facial expressions, the way they bite their lip to hold back a moan, the way they twist their nipples to intensify their pleasure, the way they lick their hand before touching themselves, etc. The end result is an extremely intimate vulnerable act that adds a new layer to the way you view masturbation.
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Overall, April is a month of feeling things through, taking more intuitive risks, investing in yourself, and balancing your needs with the needs of your relationships.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what April has in store for you.
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleARIES
April is your month to shine, Aries. With the chaos of March now over, you are starting to see the progress of where life is and how everything has turned out even better than you were expecting. The month begins with the Sun in your 1st house of self, and you are feeling more confident, courageous, and in tune with yourself. With a Full Moon in your sister sign on April 12, relationships are also coming full circle for you now, and you are claiming your peace this month.
Mercury finally goes direct on April 7 and then enters your sign from April 16 to May 10, and this is going to clear up any miscommunications that you have been through. With Mercury now in your sign, your conversations are lively, your mind is inspiring, and you are thinking one step ahead. Before the month ends, Venus enters your sign from April 30 to June 6, and love is also moving forward for you now. Overall, this is a month where you are experiencing some happy outcomes and loyal support.
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleTAURUS
April is a month of passion and purpose, Taurus. You are living in your abundance, and are focused on valuing yourself and the things you are bringing to fruition right now. Venus, your ruling planet, goes direct on March 12 after being retrograde in your financial house since March 1, and you are moving into the month experiencing more opportunities and also feeling more respected in what you are accumulating for yourself and standing your ground on.
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GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleGEMINI
This month is all about the options becoming available to you now, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month on April 7, you no longer feel as held back or out of place as you may have in the past weeks. With Mercury now direct, your thinking is clearer, and you are seeing the opportunities in your career and professional world that you may have missed before.
The more you can embrace your authenticity, the less time you will spend doubting how others perceive you, remember that this month.
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CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCANCER
This month is all about balancing your time and energy wisely, Cancer. You are being reminded not to overwork or overwhelm yourself in April, and to focus on doing the things that are within your control right now. The Sun is in your 10th house of career for most of the month so you are feeling really passionate about the things you are developing in your life right now, but it’s all about finding the right balance between your personal goals and your needs in your relationships as well.
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LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleLEO
Things are turning around for you for the better, Leo. April is a dynamic month, and you are owning your inner alchemist. With a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication on April 12, you are getting the messages you have been looking for and the mental clarity you have found is bringing closure to some of your close relationships. This month is about being flexible and trusting the changes that are happening for you right now.
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VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVIRGO
This month is all about building new foundations in your life, Virgo. You are feeling more supported and in tune with your own inner needs and interests, and it’s bringing you closer to people and systems that resonate. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct this month on April 7 after being retrograde for the past few weeks; bringing more clarity, understanding, and compassion to your partnerships in life. You are focused on love this month and are working together with others to make your dreams come true.
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LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLIBRA
This is a big month of closure for you, Libra. The Sun is in your 7th house of love for most of April, and your heart is in the right place. With Venus, your ruling planet, going direct on April 12 after being retrograde since March 1, you are finally able to take a breath. You are not experiencing as many obstacles when it comes to communication matters and you are feeling like you have the tools you need to move forward right now.
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ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleSCORPIO
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April is a new beginning for you, Sagittarius. You are focused on putting the action and effort behind your goals, and you are being proactive within the opportunities that you are looking for right now. With a Full Moon in your 11th house of aspirations mid-month, you are letting go of the way you thought things would play out for you and are owning a more abundant version of things.
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CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleCAPRICORN
April is about putting one step in front of the other with patience and dedication and trusting the decisions you are making for yourself right now, Capricorn. The Sun is in your 4th house for most of the month, and you are yearning for your safe spaces, comfort foods, and loyal people. Giving yourself more time to decompress, take care of yourself, and ground your energy is essential this month.
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AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleAQUARIUS
April is about giving yourself time to process, accept, and gain a new perspective, Aquarius. You are being guided towards friendship, connection, and community, and are understanding what may be creating the discord in your life that has been distancing you from that. The Full Moon this month is happening in Libra on April 12, and you are ready to let go of feeling like you have to do it all at once or all alone. This month is a reminder to take your time with all the experiences you want to have, trusting that they will come to fruition for you.
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PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecolePISCES
This is a month where your heart is shining, and you are feeling in tune with the progress you have made in your life and within your relationships, Pisces. You are owning your value, your worth, and the beauty of who you are, and are ready to leave the past behind. With Mercury and Venus both going direct in Pisces this month after being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you are in a better space than you have been, and there are fewer obstacles and miscommunications in your life.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole