4 Tips To Help Navigate The Holidays Alone While Serving In The Military
It's called the most wonderful time of the year for a reason, right? The holidays are usually a joyous occasion. Depending on where you live, there may be fresh snow on the ground, the beautiful scenery of the leaves changing, homes decorated with wreaths, some may have already put lights up on their houses. It is a time to bring people together, share wonderful memories, and of course, get in some good old fashioned holiday eating. But for someone serving in the military, this may be one of the most difficult times of the year.
When I arrived at my first duty station, it was three months before the holidays. I didn't know that I had to put in my leave request so far in advance, so when I did two weeks prior, my request was denied. I was heartbroken.
It also meant that I would be spending my first holiday alone away from my family. What was usually a season I looked forward to quickly became one that I dreaded as the time became closer. When the day came, I immediately felt my anxiety rising and as a result, I isolated myself, didn't take any calls, and turned what should have been a happy occasion for my family, into one filled with worry and despair. Over the years, I learned how to navigate being away from my family during the holidays. What was once a season I dreaded turned into a season that I found myself loving again.
Here are a few tips for navigating the holidays while serving in the military.
Make Friends With Your Coworkers
Gone are the days of going into work and leaving without establishing a relationship with your coworkers. They know exactly what you're going through and how you are feeling. If they aren't active duty themselves, usually they are the spouses of someone serving and are going through the exact same thing. When I established these relationships, not only did I have amazing people to spend the holidays with, I created lifelong friendships with people I still keep in touch with to this day.
Reach Out To Your Family
It's hard enough spending the holidays alone, but you shouldn't make your family suffer your pain as well. Express your concerns, but don't drown them with your "woe is me" stories. When I began to communicate with my family during the holidays, it made the transition a lot easier. I was able to let them know they didn't have to worry. In hindsight, they didn't. I had my extended military family and let's be honest, I did not have to hear about the latest family drama.
Get Into The Holiday Spirit By Helping Others
It can be daunting to spend the holidays alone, but that doesn't mean you can't get into the holiday spirit. Do the things that bring you joy during the holidays. Do you have an amazing egg nog recipe? Make it for your job's holiday potluck! Does everyone always seem marvel at your holiday decor? Offer to help someone decorate. Volunteer your services to make someone's holiday brighter and in return, you'll find that it will make yours brighter as well.
Seek Help When Needed
If you are really struggling during this holiday season, don't be afraid to ask for help. The military offers plenty of resources such as Military One Source, The Military Crisis Line, and you can always speak to someone in your Mental Health unit at your base. You don't have to go through these feelings alone. Reach out and to someone and let them know what you are going through. Remember there is always someone who is willing to help you if you let them.
Going through the holiday season as a service member can be tough, but it doesn't have to be. These tips are a great start to help you have the best holiday season you can. They have helped me through some of my toughest times as a military member and I hope they can help you too.
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Shan Britton is a veteran of the United States Air Force. She is a mother who enjoys writing, traveling, and loves all things 90's R&B. She currently resides in Houston, TX.
Your Guide To Letting Go Of What No Longer Serves You Based On Astrology
Letting go is a gift we are given and a strength that we find throughout our lives. There are times when we want to grab ahold of what we are experiencing and sensing, and times when we need to let go of something that was once everything to us or what we wanted for ourselves. The moment you conclude that you need to let something go in your life is the moment that your brain fights to make that happen for you.
In Astrology, there is an area of your birth chart that is designed for you to understand where you will be letting go a lot in this lifetime, and exactly how to do so. We dive through the birth chart as we seek a deeper understanding of ourselves and let go of what no longer serves us, and there are tools available to help us do so. If you don't know where your South Node is in your birth chart, you can use a free calculator like this one here.
What Does Your South Node Represent in Astrology?
When it comes to what we are destined to let go of or move away from in this lifetime, we look to the South Node. The South Node is the area of your birth chart that has to do with your past lives, karma, lessons, old habits and traits, gifts, and energy you are moving away from in this lifetime.
Your South Node is opposite your North Node, which is your destiny and the energy you want to move towards.
We can learn a lot from our South Node and it’s an area of our life where we tend to gain the most wisdom. By understanding why some patterns in your life tend to play out in the same ways, you can be more conscious of the choices you make in the now and let go of who and what doesn’t serve you in the process.
South Node Insights: Letting Go
The South Node is our natural gifts and talents, but also where we don’t need to focus so much of our energy on, taking us away from where we need to be developing, which is the North Node. So when you are looking to let go of something, gain a new perspective, or feel more trusting in what you are doing right now, you can examine your South Node.
We learn from our South Node by not making the same mistakes over again, letting go of what needs to be let go of, and understanding what we need in order to create space for our new beginning.
Read below for your South Node on how to let go of what no longer serves you.
Aries South Node: Letting Go of Independence for Connection
You are used to being independent and figuring things out on your own. In this lifetime, however, you are being asked to lean on others for support when you need it. You are working on letting go of the ego and focusing more on the heart. By extending your compassion for others, you discover a part of yourself that leads you toward empowerment and allows you to let go of a false sense of safety.
You are meant to experience harmonious, fortunate, and compatible love in this lifetime, and you will do so by opening your heart to others and letting go of people who don’t support you or whom you can’t count on.
Taurus South Node: Releasing Overdependence and Superficiality
With your South Node in Taurus, you are letting go of the need to acquire by focusing on the depth and intention of what you are obtaining. Your relationships tend to have a lot to do with your financial world, and these things can get twisted and distorted if you are not being careful.
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of what doesn’t serve you by following your heart and your intuition more and focusing more on the feeling you want for yourself rather than the things themselves. You are also working on letting go of overdependence or superficiality in relationships, by connecting with the people whom you have a deep and spiritual bond with.
Gemini South Node: Finding Freedom in Authenticity
For you, letting go means following your freedom. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime, and the less you can focus on how you are going to be perceived, the more you can live the life of your dreams. With a South Node in Gemini, you are moving away from the commotion of life. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is traveling, getting out of your comfort zone, and being in new environments.
In past lives, you may have given too much of your focus on your social successes and business pursuits, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on the bigger picture. What helps you let go is understanding that once you do, better is available to you.
Cancer South Node: Trusting Yourself Beyond Emotional Impulses
With a South Node in Cancer, you are learning to trust yourself and your logic more than your emotional world in this lifetime. By letting go of feeling like you have to be the one to nurture and support everyone and allowing people to do that for you, you lead your destiny.
With your South Node in Cancer, you are letting go of emotional impulsiveness or making decisions irrationally before you have thought about them.
In past lives, you were led by your emotional world, and in this lifetime, you are meant to think more about your long-term goals and intentions. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is knowing that you are more than what you can give to others.
Leo South Node: Prioritizing Community Over Recognition
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of the need to be seen and recognized and focus more on your need for community and soul companionship. You are moving away from the “I” and moving closer to the “We.” What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is giving your focus to humanity, the progress you want to make in this lifetime, and who you want to make it with.
You are learning how to work with others and let go of the need to figure everything out yourself. The more you connect with the people who make you want to team up and form a relationship, rather than the people who make you want to be alone, the better for you.
Virgo South Node: Embracing Compassion Over Perfection
In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to do everything yourself and to have everything all together. You can let go of what no longer serves you by thinking more with your heart than you do with your mind and by trusting this gift of yours. By focusing more on your spirituality, emotional connections, and creativity, you let go of a timid side of you that can disrupt your relationships or the bonds you make.
In past lifetimes, you were focused on perfection. In this lifetime, you are meant to focus on compassion. By surrendering more to the flow of things, you can let go of what no longer serves you while remaining open for what does.
Libra South Node: Rediscovering Your Independence
With your South Node in Libra, you are meant to experience the gifts of independence, freedom, and inner clarity in this lifetime. In the past, you may have been more dependent on the people around you and made a lot of your focus on love. However, in this lifetime, you are being reminded to not lose your identity in others. You can let go of what no longer serves you by only moving towards the things that feel authentic to you.
You are meant to feel confident, inspired, and free in your relationships, and if you don’t feel this way, then that is a sign you are around energy that doesn’t serve you. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime.
Scorpio South Node: Letting Go of Struggles and Embracing Ease
With your South Node in Scorpio, you have lived many lives and have experienced a lot emotionally. In this lifetime, you are learning how to trust the process more and to understand that not everything has to be difficult or trying for you. You can experience great things with ease, and you’ll know you are in the right place when things are just falling into your lap.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is focusing more on the things and people who make you feel safe, stable, and comfortable. Instead of always seeking the rush or the thrill, bring your attention more towards the things that ground you.
Sagittarius South Node: Building Connection Through Learning
Your South Node in Sagittarius urges you towards connection with your community and your immediate environment. In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to be everywhere at once, rather than with the people who matter most to you. You are moving away from knowing everything and into learning everything.
By looking at life as a place where you will learn, grow, and connect, you can let go of the things that stretch you too thin or don’t serve your heart.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is expressing yourself more, meeting new people, and spending time on a cause or creative project that inspires you.
Capricorn South Node: Choosing Home and Foundations Over Status
In this lifetime, you are meant to put more value and effort into your personal life, home, family, and foundations in life. In past lifetimes, a lot of your focus was on your reputation, achievements, and successes, and in this lifetime, you are meant to bring your energy more to the home base, family, and stability in life.
You will know if something is right for you if you want it because it makes you feel safe and nurtured, rather than just something that looks pleasing to the eye. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is by focusing more on your personal life rather than your public, and what you truly see for yourself here.
Aquarius South Node: Shining in Your Individuality
With an Aquarius South Node, you are meant to shine, be seen, and express yourself in this lifetime. You are letting go of the lone wolf energy you are used to, and working on taking up space. You are able to let go of what no longer serves you by being confident in yourself and the decisions you are making.
If someone doesn’t make you feel like the best thing in the entire world, then they aren’t right for you. In past lifetimes, you gave a lot of your energy to your community and the people around you, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on yourself and your path more. It’s all about doing what makes you feel good and trusting that you deserve to.
Pisces South Node: Honoring Logic While Embracing Intuition
Your lesson in this lifetime is that your mind is your gift. In past lives, you were very intuitive, psychic, and spiritual, and in this lifetime, you are learning to trust and honor the logical part of yourself more. You may tend to put your all into your relationships and not get the same energy back, and you are working on taking care of yourself first before you can give to another.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is trusting your body and the signals it gives you when you are around certain people or energy that doesn’t serve. Get organized, figure out your needs, boundaries, and wants, and get clear on who you are and what you want for yourself.
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Tyler Lepley Said He Knew He Would Marry Miracle Watts When They Met
Tyler Lepley and Miracle Watts quickly became one of our favorite couples to watch, so when the Harlem actor finally put a ring on it, we were happy for our sis. However, Tyler received criticism for waiting "too long" to ask Miracle for her hand in marriage, especially after Miracle expressed wanting marriage on her YouTube page.
In a Q&A with fans, the model was asked, "Do you see yourself getting married?" She replied, "Of course. Of course! I better see myself getting married soon. Soon."
The following question asked if it was "disrespectful for a man not to marry a woman after being with her for a certain amount of years if they both agree that marriage is something that they want?" The mom of one answered, "I do. I do. I do and we're coming up on that time... You better get it together."
Well according to Tyler, he knew Miracle was "the one" from jump and he just wanted them to take their time. He addressed the criticism head on while visiting The Breakfast Club with his Harlem costars.
"When it comes to any relationship, whether we're talking about my fiancée Miracle or my sisters right here (referring to his co-stars), it behooves us to really take our time with it," he said. "To figure out a place where we can get in, where it's a true give-and-take relationship, where we're really bringing something to the table and able to take something away from it."
He continued, "That takes time. We live in this microwave society where everything is supposed to be overnight. Social media makes it harder...makes it more difficult, because you're not able to grow at your own pace. You have to suffer your wins and your losses sometimes, well, all the time, in front of everybody."
The costars met on P-Valley season two and reportedly started dating in 2021. Not too long after, they became Instagram official and, in May 2022, revealed they were expecting their first child together. The couple announced their engagement On November 3, 2024.
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Feature image @miraclewatts00/ Instagram