There are a lot of things that can be the underlying cause of a bad mood. A lack of sleep. Anxiety. Hunger. PMS. Alcohol. Depression. The consumption of too much sugar and/or caffeine. Stress. The list really does go on and on. But there's a theory I read recently about that triggers a bad mood that really caught my attention.
According to a researcher by the name of Roy Baumeister, the reason why a lot of us find ourselves not being in the best of moods is due to, what he calls, "ego depletion". The long short of it is, whenever we're tempted by something (or someone) and we push our willpower to the limit, it drains our cognitive abilities and that results in being irritable, snappy, distant, rude, annoyed—and all of the other things that come with being in a bad mood. (The ego is a trip, ain't it?) So, if you're currently in a bad mood, reflecting on your current struggles with temptation may be something to think about.
But, if you're usually on top of the world, it's been a couple of weeks now and, no matter what you do, you can't seem to get back to your old self again, avoid the urge to Google your way into a diagnosis; see your doctor instead. On the flip side, if you simply woke up on the wrong side of the bed or you know your willpower is running on fumes, there are also plenty of studies to support that your diet can make all of the difference in the world.
So, before you go ham on a co-worker or send a pop-off text that you very well could end up regretting, use your lunch break or make plans to go home to eat a few of these foods. It might be just what you need to get a smile back on your face.
Sweet Potatoes
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Did you know that sweet potatoes are considered to be a perfect food? With good reason too because they contain pantothenic acid (vitamin B5), niacin (vitamin B3), vitamin B6, vitamins A and C, potassium, manganese, magnesium, copper, beta-carotene, antioxidants and fiber—and that's just for starters! Thanks to all of the nutrients that are in them, sweet potatoes help to keep your heart healthy, boost your immunity, regulate your blood sugar, fuel your brain, reduce anxiety and, due to the fiber, iron and magnesium that's also in sweet potatoes, they are an awesome source of energy too.
There are two main reasons why sweet potatoes can make you feel better. First, the antioxidant beta-carotene that's in them will help to keep free radicals from damaging your brain. Secondly, sweet potatoes can lower oxidative stress which is directly linked to stress and anxiety.
Mood Booster: A "happy way" to enjoy sweet potatoes is to DIY some sweet potato flatbread (leave a comment in the comments section if you actually do end up making some because, I'm telling you, it's delicious!).
Salmon
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I don't know about you, but salmon is one of my favorite foods. It's got omega-3 fatty acids, is a wonderful source of protein, it contains just about every kind of B vitamin you can think of and it's loaded with both potassium and selenium. Something that's really cool about salmon is, thanks to the protein that's in it, it can help to control your appetite so that you can maintain your weight. It's also the kind of food that fights inflammation.
Salmon will put a smile on your face because, the more omega-3 that you consume, the more you increase the chances of not experiencing depression-related symptoms. Salmon also has the ability to keep your brain flexible; this matters because the more "flexible" your brain is, the more effective your brain's neurotransmitters are.
Mood Booster: One way to feel joy in your soul again is to try this honey-soy salmon recipe out.
Bananas
Protein. Fiber. Potassium. Vitamins B6 and C. Manganese. Copper. Every time you eat a banana, this is what you're putting into your system. It's another kind of food that maintains blood sugar levels as it improves digestive and kidney health. Something else that's cool about bananas is if you're someone who works out, the potassium in this particular fruit is able to reduce muscle soreness and cramping. Bananas are also loaded with (the good kind of) carbohydrates which means that peeling one on your lunch break is one of the quickest ways to get you through the rest of the day.
One more thing—the tryptophan and folate that are in them will regulate your moods and help to reduce depression symptoms too. Eat up!
Mood Booster: Wanna get out of that funky mood in under an hour? How about some banana oatmeal pancakes for breakfast?
Olive Oil
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If you don't already have a bottle of olive oil in your pantry, cop a couple of 'em. Olive oil has omega-6 and omega-3 fatty acids, antioxidants, vitamins E and K and anti-inflammatory, antibacterial and anti-cancer properties in it. Bottom line, if you want to keep your heart, joints and brain in good shape, olive oil will help to make that happen.
On the good mood tip, olive oil is able to boost your body's serotonin levels. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter chemical that is connected to your brain's appetite, sexual desire, sleep, memory and yes—your moods.
Mood Booster: It's OK to treat yourself to a little bread (especially if it's naan or pita) every once in a while. When you do, lift your spirits with a little olive oil dipping sauce.
Quinoa
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Quinoa is a seed that is usually mistaken for a grain (including by me). Anyway, if you're looking for the kind of food that is pretty much a multivitamin in a bowl, quinoa's got you. For starters, it's got manganese, thiamine, zinc, phosphorus, folate, copper, riboflavin, magnesium, protein and vitamin E all up in it. If you're looking for a gluten-free food, quinoa qualifies as being that as well. A food that reduces body inflammation, quinoa can hook you up with that too. Quinoa is also the kind of food that keeps your bones healthy and strong.
Something else that's great about quinoa is it's the kind of food that is packed with protein, along with amino acids. So, if you know that lately you've been consuming foods that have your blood sugar levels on a roller coaster ride (eh hem, like basically any kind of white starch or sugar), you can rely on quinoa to level you out and stabilize your moods in the process.
Mood Booster: I don't know how you couldn't lighten up after having a mango quinoa burrito bowl.
Ghee Butter
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If you're not familiar with what ghee butter is, it's basically like a form of clarified butter; only it's simmered over heat a bit longer. The end result is the kind of butter that is packed with vitamins E and K, linoleic acid (a fatty acid that reduces body fat and inflammation), butyric acid (a fatty acid that maintains gut health) and Vitamin K2 that helps to keep tooth decay at bay.
Another awesome thing about ghee butter is it has ojas in it. If you take yoga, you probably know that an oja is an Ayurveda term that stands for "life force". They are what's able to reduce stress and detox the body from things that are related to poor diet and nutrition. So yeah, you can't go wrong with putting a teaspoon or two of ghee butter into your food.
Mood Booster: You can find ghee butter at your local grocery store (or on Amazon). But if you want to take a stab at making some at home, you can find a step-by-step recipe right here.
Seaweed
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Seaweed is a form of algae; that's true. But it's also a type of food that shouldn't be slept on. It contains iodine and tyrosine which is great for your thyroid, along with fiber, riboflavin, thiamin, manganese and copper. Something else that seaweed gives you is a good dose of the carotenoid fucoxanthin; it has 13.5 times the amount of antioxidants that are found in vitamin E and it's what protects cell membranes better than vitamin A does. (Just make sure to consume seaweed in moderation; especially if you have an iodine sensitivity.)
The reason why seaweed makes the "happy food list" is because it's another food that has a lot of tryptophan in it. The more tryptophan you have, the better (and sometimes sleepier), you'll feel.
Mood Booster: Love on yourself—and that mood of yours—with a little seaweed risotto.
Red Wine
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If you don't currently have a bottle of red wine in your house, get at least one. It's packed with antioxidants that fight off free radicals, it builds up your immune system, increases bone density, fights heart disease, reduces the risk of having a stroke, cancer and type 2 diabetes too.
And just how is red wine proven to improve your moods? Well, it releases the neurotransmitters including serotonin, dopamine and opioid peptides. After that happens, red wine gives you a euphoric feeling. Just make sure to try this tip once you get off work. Sometimes euphoria can be mistaken for tipsy or even lit, if you know what I mean.
Mood Booster: Got a little time on your hands? Make some vegan ragu that has red wine in it for you and a friend while sharing stories that will make each other laugh.
Honey
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Honey is literally one of the sweetest things for your health. Not only does it taste delicious, but the benefits are endless. Honey is full of antioxidants, can help to lower blood pressure and improve cholesterol levels, will give you an energy boost during the day and is a great sleep agent at night, suppresses coughing, manages weight, fights allergy symptoms, relieves nausea, improves diabetes, promotes good bacteria in intestines…girrrl, honey is pure bomb.
And yes, honey is another food that is able to get you into a good mood, thanks to the polyphenols that's in it. In fact, if you want to read how honey benefits you holistically, there's a pretty interesting study on it here.
Mood Booster: I'll just say this and then drop the mic: HONEY. LAVENDER. POPSICLES. **Are you smilin' yet?**
Raisins
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Nature's candy. A lot of us remember growing up and hearing that phrase as it relates to raisins, but what it all boils down to is it's dried-up grapes. What makes raisins a pretty cool snack is it contains iron, copper, B-complex vitamins, catechins (which fight off free radicals), fiber, magnesium and potassium. Something else that raisins have in them are polyphenolic phytochemicals which are not only antibacterial agents, but they are also great at maintaining eye health.
The reason why this particular dry fruit rounds out the lift-your-spirits list is because I recently read an article that said sad people tend to eat a lot of chocolate while happy people are constantly chopping on raisins. I'm not sure about all-a-dat but I'm not a scientist. Anyway, if you're feeling low, a handful of nature's candy is a lot worth a shot!
Mood Booster: If you like to watch someone prepare a meal and then make it yourself, you'll absolutely dig Tish Wonder's YouTube channel. The recipe that has plenty raisins in it is her red lentil coconut curry. Enjoy!
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Different puzzle pieces are creating bigger pictures these days. 2024 will mark a milestone on a few different levels, including the release of my third book next October (yay!).
I am also a Professional Certified Coach. My main mission for attaining that particular goal is to use my formal credentials to help people navigate through the sometimes tumultuous waters, both on and offline, when it comes to information about marriage, sex and relationships that is oftentimes misinformation (because "coach" is a word that gets thrown around a lot, oftentimes quite poorly).
I am also still super devoted to helping to bring life into this world as a doula, marriage life coaching will always be my first love (next to writing, of course), a platform that advocates for good Black men is currently in the works and my keystrokes continue to be devoted to HEALTHY over HAPPY in the areas of holistic intimacy, spiritual evolution, purpose manifestation and self-love...because maturity teaches that it's impossible to be happy all of the time when it comes to reaching goals yet healthy is a choice that can be made on a daily basis (amen?).
If you have any PERSONAL QUESTIONS (please do not contact me with any story pitches; that is an *editorial* need), feel free to reach out at missnosipho@gmail.com. A sistah will certainly do what she can. ;)
Exclusive: Dreka Gates Talks Farm Life, Self-Mastery, And Her Wellness Brand
Dreka Gates is making a name in wellness through authenticity and innovativeness. Although we were introduced to her as a music manager for her husband, Kevin Gates, she has now carved out her own lane outside of music as a wellness entrepreneur. But according to Dreka, this is nothing new.
In an xoNecole exclusive, the mom of two opened up about many things, including starting her wellness journey at 13 years old. However, a near-death experience during a procedure at 20 made her start taking her health more seriously.
“There's so many different levels, and now, I'm in a space of just integrating all of this good stuff that I've learned just about just being human, you know?” Dreka tells us. “So it's also fun because it's like a journey of self-discovery and self-mastery. That's what I call it. So it's never-ending.”
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If you follow Dreka, then you’re familiar with her holistic lifestyle, as she’s no stranger to promoting wellness, self-care, and holistic living. She even lives part-time on a Mississippi farm, not far from her grandmother and great-grandmother’s farm, where she spent some summers as a child.
While her grandmother and great-grandmother have passed on, Dreka reflects on that time in her life and how having a farm as an adult is her getting back to her roots. “So the farm was purchased back in 2017, and it was like, ah, that'll just be a place where we go when we're not touring or whatever,” she said.
“But COVID hit, and I was there, and I was on the land, and I just started remembering back to going to my grandmother's during the summertime and freaking picking peas and going and eating mulberries off the freaking tree in the bushes.
“And she literally had cotton plants. I know some people feel weird about picking cotton and stuff. She had cotton plants and I would go and pick cotton out of her garden. And she had chickens, and I literally just broke down in tears one day when I was on the farm just doing all the things, and I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh. I'm literally getting back to my roots.”
"I literally just broke down in tears one day when I was on the farm just doing all the things, and I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh. I'm literally getting back to my roots."
You can catch glimpses of Dreka’s farm life on Instagram, which shows her picking fruit and vegetables and loving on her animals like her camel Eessa. Her passion for growing and cultivating led her to try and grow all of her ingredients for her wellness brand, Dreka Wellness. However, she quickly realized that she might be biting off more than she could chew. But that didn’t stop her from fulfilling her vision.
Watch below as Dreka talks more about her business, her wellness tips, breaking toxic cycles, becoming a doula, and more.
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How Actress And Comedian That Chick Angel Entered Her Second Act With "One Margarita"
Actress and comedian, Angel Moore, best known by her moniker, That Chick Angel, knew from a young age that her name would preface a certain celestial ambition: to become a star.
She recalls an instant connection with Keshia Knight Pulliam's portrayal of Rudy on The Cosby Show, which sparked her desire to become an actor, “I was like, 'I want to do that,” she tells xoNecole. "Acting is always what I have done, whether it be church plays, school plays... it's what I've done for a lot of my life."
As many “church kids” can attest, the altar doubled as a stage for nurturing natural talent, and Angel’s experience was no different. "Growing up in the church, they’re going make you sing in the choir — so singing was a part of my life, probably even before acting became a part of my life." Angel's role as the youngest of four also played well with bringing out her comedic sensibilities. "It kind of became my role, an unspoken role, to bring levity to my family. I was always the comedic little sister that lightened up the mood," she says.
Angel’s trajectory into the industry may not have been the one she imagined, but is far from unexpected.
Credit: Ted Sun
Her formal training in acting, including earning an MFA from the University of California, Irvine, led her to explore musical theater and eventually stand-up comedy. This instinct for humor created a non-linear yet harmonious path, landing her in roles on hit TV shows like Black-ish and A Black Lady Sketch Show, preparing her for what would come next.
Last summer, her spontaneous freestyle launched Angel into her second act: a hit-making rapper. What started with a TikTok video of a preacher warning Louisiana State University students of the supposed dangers of women in Mexican restaurants, soon turned into an instant summertime anthem.
She debuted a freestyle on her podcast Here's the Thing, co-hosted with Kevin Fredericks (KevOnStage), asking Fredericks for a beat, and began freestyling what is now “One Margarita.”
While she admits that she usually “can’t land the plane” doing freestyles, this time it stuck. Producers Casa Di and Steve Steven Terrell blessed the track with a beat that took flight, transforming a cautionary sermon into a chart-topping hit.
Moore has since gone from interviewing celebrities on the NAACP's red carpet to becoming a recipient of the NAACP’s 2023 Outstanding Social Media Personality award, what she notes as a “full circle moment.”
At times, life can feel like one long dress rehearsal, but That Chick Angel is proof that when it's your time to take the stage, no one can stop your shine.
xoNecole: You’ve shared that a lot of the inspiration behind your songs is to just have fun. Has that always been your motivation as an artist/entertainer? Or have you ever dealt with any perfectionism that can stall the flow of fun?
That Chick Angel: “In the very beginning of my content creation career, I was trying to do this ‘perfectionist’ type of thing, and I quickly stopped because nothing was getting done. I was waiting for perfect, but perfect wasn’t showing up. Eventually, I got to a place of, ‘Girl, we’re not going to worry about perfect, we’re going to worry about done,’ and I was able to focus on my true purpose: bringing joy into the room.
“That's where you get the ‘funness’ behind the songs and content I create online or even in my podcast. Not to say that we can’t have deep moments — I will never try to belittle my intelligence or my experiences for a joke, but I also want to speak the truth about situations as well.”
You’ve been creating content since 2009. In what ways has the power of social media played a role in your success?
“I started making content when I got pregnant with my first baby, and it was just a creative outlet. This is my 15th anniversary of [creating] content, so I am blessed to be one of the OGs that started before we knew what the heck was going on.
“At the time, I was very adamant about keeping my professional acting life separate from my content life because I didn't know the value of my content. I remember telling my friends when I would be recording stuff, ‘I don't know why I'm doing this, but I feel like I'm supposed to be doing this.’ I continued to make content, not knowing what it would all amount to. What it has amounted to, career-wise, is that I’ve gotten to establish my brand and say who I am before someone else even had the opportunity to fix their lips to tell me who I am in the space.”
"I continued to make content, not knowing what it would all amount to. What it has amounted to, career-wise, is that I’ve gotten to establish my brand and say who I am before someone else even had the opportunity to fix their lips to tell me who I am in the space."
Credit: Ted Sun
You're a wife and mother of four boys — how do you find balance between the demands of motherhood with your entertainment career?
“I'm a card-carrying member of the Beyhive and I remember seeing the clips of when Blue Ivy started performing with Beyoncé. I'm not an emotional person, but I remember tears welled up seeing Blue Ivy on stage with Beyoncé. It wasn't so much about Blue Ivy in that moment, it was seeing Beyoncé be a consummate performer and a mother at the same moment, at 100 percent. That’s what I long to be: to not have to shrink what God has purposed in me and all the gifts He's given me while being a mother. And not have to shrink being a mother to be all the things God wants me to be.
“Are there times when one has to take precedence? Absolutely. But I feel like I have created a life where I get to do both things: be a family woman and be a businesswoman and not having to sacrifice one for the other.”
One of the things I appreciate about "One Margarita" is how it playfully embraces sexual freedom. How have your personal experiences, including growing up in the church, shaped your views on sexual freedom as the woman you are today?
“It creates safety for a woman to be able to clearly and unashamedly say what she wants. When we have conversations around consent, it’s two people saying, ‘This is what I like, would you like to do this with me?’ And the other person saying, ‘I would like to do this.’ Until we make women know that it is okay for them to verbalize what they want, we're constantly putting them in unsafe places if they don't feel like they can say yes or no.”
"That’s what I long to be: to not have to shrink what God has purposed in me and all the gifts He's given me while being a mother. And not have to shrink being a mother to be all the things God wants me to be."
Credit: Ted Sun
Your latest single, "I Just Wanna Shake My," captures your fun and audacious spirit, and with your EP coming this fall, what can new and existing fans expect from your debut EP?
“They can expect me to walk through whatever door God opens. In 2023, I didn’t know I would have a trap song that has over 20 million streams, but I'm sure the Lord did. My ultimate goal is to release this EP, create a one-woman show around the songs, and tour it in 2025 so I can bring out more of my comedic elements and acting. Whatever doors are going to open, Angel is going to run through and say, ‘God what do you want me to do with it?’"
For more of That Chick Angel, follow her on Instagram @thatchickangel.
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Featured image by Ted Sun