I don't know about y'all, but if there is one very necessary task that I pretty much have to gas myself up to do, each and every time that I do it, it's shampooing and conditioning my hair. Back when I had a TWA (Teeny Weeny Afro), it was nothing to wash it in the shower and let it air dry as I go about my day. Yet now that I finally have a few inches—and, as my braider always tells me, a lot of hair density—there is no other word to describe wash day other than being an absolute chore. Still, it's something that has to be done if I want my hair to flourish.
I must admit that over the past three years or so, I have figured out a routine that makes wash day a lot less stressful and time-consuming. If you'd like to know my personal approach, I've included 10 tips that can make your own wash day a bit less of a headache than it (probably) currently is.
1. Set Up Some Entertainment
The longer my hair gets, the more I have to gas myself up to wash it. The reason why is because, sometimes, believe it or not, it's the rushing through the shampooing, conditioning and drying process on wash day that can end up doing your hair the most damage. What can help you to avoid rushing, so that you can handle your hair with the ultimate care, is to set up some sort of entertainment that can help to keep you in good spirits. It can be turning on some throwback jams or making the decision to catch up on a favorite show. My hair, right now, is a little past my chin and, from beginning to end, wash day takes about three hours (mostly because I try to deep condition for about 1.5-2 hours of that). Based on the length of your own locks, that can help you to get an idea of whether you'll be listening to one LP or watching two movies. Either way, it can help you to enjoy something that you might not have much time to do otherwise.
2. Give Your Hair a Little Bit of Steam
Out of all the tips that I'm about to share with you, the one that you may have never done or even considered before is steaming your hair. If you do this before actually shampooing your tresses, it can help to lift your hair's cuticles; that way, each strand is able to absorb both the water as well as the products that you're about to apply so much easier.
You can steam your hair by either using an actual hair steamer. Or, if money is a little tight right now, another approach is to simply stand in the back of your shower (so that the water doesn't get all over you), with the water as hot as possible and with your bathroom door closed for a good 7-10 minutes. As a bonus, your face can get a little bit of a steam detox treatment too.
3. Treat Your Scalp
Before we get into how to properly wash your hair in a way that will help you to save time, let's talk about your scalp for a hot sec, shall we? After all, it is the foundation of your hair. Since it's not hard to collect build-up that can irritate your scalp, I'm a big fan of detoxing it before shampooing and conditioning your hair. Don't worry—it actually sounds like more complex of a process than it actually is. You can decide which kind of detoxing you'd prefer to do by checking out the article on our site entitled, "Treat Your Scalp To A Little Bit Of Detoxing This Weekend".
4. Don’t Forget to Pre-Poo
Once your hair is all steamed up and your scalp is detoxed (the steam can help to open up your pores which makes the detoxing process more potent), it's now time to apply one more prep step and that's to do some pre-pooing. The long short of this is it's all about applying an oil to your hair, basically for two main purposes. For one thing, the oil can help to add a little more moisture to your hair which can help to protect it from any stripping of natural oils that shampooing might do. Secondly, pre-pooing makes the next step that I'm about to discuss oh, so much easier. Just make sure that you go with an oil that will nourish your locks. Coconut, avocado, jojoba, grapeseed and even virgin olive oil are all really good ones. Simply wet your hair with lukewarm water and apply a healthy amount of oil to your hair; not enough to make it all greasy, but definitely enough that it gives your tresses enough "slip" to make it super manageable.
5. Then Do Some Detangling
It's gonna be pretty difficult to thoroughly wash your hair, if it's all stuck together and/or tied up in knots. That's why it's a good idea to do some detangling before you actually apply any product. Once your hair is wet and your preferred oil of choice is applied, I recommend using your fingers—at least first—before using a detangling comb. Wet hair is mad fragile, so you don't want to immediately start hacking away at your hair with a styling tool. Anyway, make sure that you start, not at the roots of your hair but actually the ends. Feel around for any fairy knots and try and separate them with your fingers. Then work your way up the shaft. Once you can, at least for the most part, run your hands through your hair, you can then separate your hair even more with a detangling comb. If you need some help with figuring out which detangling comb (or brush) would be best for your hair, I checked out a few YouTube videos that can probably point you into the right direction. You can view them yourself here, here and here.
6. Use a Sulfate-Free Shampoo
Our scalp tends to collect a fair share of sweat (especially if you work out on a regular basis) while our hair gets full of dirt and product over a period of time. This is why it's necessary to have a wash day, to begin with. As far as how often you should shampoo (and condition) your hair, it kind of depends on your own hair type and lifestyle. However, a lot of professional stylists would recommend that unless your hair is type 1-3a (because those types have strands that are straighter which makes it easier for our body's natural oils to run completely down the shaft which causes the hair to get oily faster), every 10-14 days is pretty standard. The reason why you shouldn't wash your hair more than that is that there is such a thing as "overdoing it"—stripping your hair of the natural moisture that it has and needs which can cause your hair to become dry and brittle which can ultimately cause breakage.
Whew. Now with all of that said, just make sure that you avoid sulfate shampoos. The reason why is because they contain ingredients that can further strip your hair. There is just one caveat to this particular tip. If you've been using a lot of product and you need to make sure that you remove all of it, a sulfate shampoo can help to get the job done. Just make sure that you don't incorporate it into your wash day routine on a regular basis and that you definitely deep condition your hair after using it in order to replace the moisture that was lost.
As far as the kind of sulfate-free shampoos that are best, I personally use shampoo bars that are made of honey and/or Jamaican black castor oil (Etsy has many options). Also, Naturally Curly did us all a solid with their article "Top 30 Sulfate-Free Shampoos". You can probably find a shampoo that is just perfect for you there as well.
Oh, and for those of you who may be like, "So, what about co-washing instead of shampooing?" Eh. That's something that is totally up to your own discretion. What I will say is if you do decide to "wash" your hair with conditioner rather than with shampoo, at least try and shampoo your hair, every third wash day. While co-washing can help your hair to retain even more moisture, there comes a time in every woman's life when her hair needs some old-fashioned washing. Feel me?
7. Shampoo in Sections
If one of the main reasons why you semi-loathe wash day is because your hair seems to end up a matted mess, that's probably because you don't wash your hair in sections. Once you've finished shampooing, apply a little of the pre-poo oil that you already used to your fingers and then section your hair off into four main parts. If you want, you can hold each piece with plastic—not metal, plastic—hair clips. Then, wash each section, one at a time. That way, you can effectively clean all of your hair (and scalp) without your hair getting all tangled up in the process.
8. Deep Condition
I honestly don't think that I will ever do an article on hair care where I won't recommend deep conditioning locks. Ever since I've made a point and purpose to do it, my hair has felt so much softer and I've been able to retain so much more length. Deep conditioning is all about applying a conditioner to your hair and letting it sit for more than just a couple of minutes. As I said earlier, I try and let mine fully saturate the cuticles of my hair for at least 1-2 hours; sometimes, even overnight.
While you could use pretty much any conditioner, my personal recommendation is to look for one that is "branded" as being a deep conditioner (Essence has a cool list here). Those tend to be thicker in consistency which can help to give your hair more moisture. An added tip would be to add some Chebe powder to your conditioner; it'll help to restore the pH balance of your hair while also making it feel super soft. I use it every wash day and I've definitely seen a difference since I started adding it to my hair routine.
9. Let Your Locks Air Dry as Much as Possible
Now that your hair is all clean and well-conditioned, it's time to start prepping it for styling. While some people are extremely anti-heat, I'm actually not that girl. I've found that blow drying my hair on wash days (and then not really using any heat on my hair until the next wash day rolls around) has helped to reduce tangles and fairy knots. The key is to get a quality dryer, to allow your hair to air dry at least 50-60 percent before applying any heat, to use a cream-based thermal heat protectant on your hair, and to make sure that your blow dryer is set to no higher than medium. Applying all of these tips (not just one, all) will significantly decrease your chances of hair damage. It can also really speed up the time it takes to finish up your hair routine on wash day.
10. Put Your Hair into a Protective Style
While I would really like to have my soul glowin', every day of the week, I've gotta admit that I experience a lot less breakage when I keep my hair in a protective style during the weekday and then let it do its own thing, in all of its glory, on the weekend. For the record, a protective style doesn't have to be braids or twists. It can also be a wig or weave. Whatever you decide to do, the objective should be to do what you can to keep the ends of your hair from being exposed to the outer elements while keeping you from manipulating your tresses a lot.
Welp. That's it. It might seem like a lot at first, but once you get into the swing of this routine, you should be able to finish in three hours or so (even less if you opt to deep condition your hair for only thirty minutes or so). Anyway, here's to healthy and clean tresses, sis. The kind of hair that makes it well worth enduring…wash day.
Join our xoTribe, an exclusive community dedicated to YOU and your stories and all things xoNecole. Be a part of a growing community of women from all over the world who come together to uplift, inspire, and inform each other on all things related to the glow up.
Featured image by Shutterstock
- Tips for Sensitive Scalp - Natural Hair - xoNecole: Women's Interest ... ›
- Uncommon (But Totally Natural) Things That Are Great For Hair ... ›
- Hair Grease Might Be The Key To Natural Hair Growth - xoNecole ... ›
- I Tried Dove Amplified Textures On Type 4 Natural Hair - xoNecole ... ›
- What Your Natural Hair Needs: Spring Edition - xoNecole: Women's ... ›
It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
There’s just something about HBCU Homecoming that just hits different. Whether it’s your first time stepping onto the yard since graduation or you’re a regular at every Homecoming tailgate, HBCU pride is undeniable. It’s a vibrant celebration that unites the legacy of excellence and tradition with the energy and resilience of Black culture.
The experience goes beyond a typical college reunion; HBCU Homecoming is a family reunion, a fashion show, a cultural festival, and a week-long turn-up that embodies what it means to be unapologetically Black and educated. For HBCU alumni, the journey back to the yard each year is rooted in a love and pride that’s hard to put into words but impossible to deny.
From statement pieces to tech must-haves, every item represents the intersection of Black pride and HBCU love, ensuring that you show up to the yard in style and with intention. So whether you’re repping your alma mater for the first time since graduation or looking for fresh pieces to express your HBCU pride, these essentials will have you standing out, because, at HBCU Homecoming, it’s not just about showing up—it’s about showing out.
Thread Goals
diarrablu Jant Pants in Alia Noir
High-waisted, wide-legged, and ready to shut down the yard, the Jant Pants by diarrablu bring a whole new meaning to campus chic. Handcrafted in Dakar, Senegal, these free-flowing jacquard pants are perfect for stepping onto the yard with style and ease—making them a must-have for any HBCU alum’s closet.
Silver & Riley Convertible Executive Leather Bag Classic Size in Olive
This all-in-one luxury bag isn’t a bestseller for nothing. The Silver & Riley essential is made of Italian calfskin leather and thoughtfully designed, as it can be worn in four different ways: a shoulder bag, crossbody, a top handle, and a backpack. Chic and elegant, the Convertible Executive Leather bag is “the bag that every woman needs in her collection.”
Renowned Women's Intuition Cotton Graphic T-Shirt
Renowned
Renowned’s Women’s Intuition Cotton Graphic T-shirt features a bold graphic print inspired by the power and essence of women’s intuition. With its striking design, this all-cotton tee is a vibrant thing, making it a statement piece that celebrates feminine energy.
Mifland Million M Mesh Crop Shirt
Talk about bold, the Million M Mesh Crop Shirt combines edgy style with comfort, featuring Mifland’s signature print on a semi-see-through mesh fabric. Show up and show out in sophisticated flair.
HBCU Love FUBU
Melanin Is Life Melanated & Educated - I Love My HBCU Hoodie
Show off your HBCU love with this piece that represents everything you gained from your alma mater: a top-tier education, a community that lifts you up, and a deep sense of esteem for yourself and your culture. Wear it loud and proud, because being melanated and educated isn’t just a flex—it’s a legacy.
HBCU Culture Spelmanite Sweatshirt in Navy
Spelmanites, rep your Spelman pride with this unisex crewneck sweatshirt, designed for ultimate comfort and a relaxed fit. Made from a cozy cotton/polyester blend, this classic sweatshirt is as durable as it is stylish—making it an ideal piece for any Spelmanite showing love for their alma mater.
HBCU Culture Howard Is The Culture T-Shirt
Rock the ultimate flex by showcasing your Howard U love with HBCU Culture’s Howard Is The Culture t-shirt. This unisex tee offers a comfortable, relaxed fit that’s perfect for celebrating your HBCU spirit without sacrificing style or comfort.
DungeonForward FAMU - Strike Bucket - Reversible
DungeonForward’s Strike Bucket Hat brings versatility and style to the FAMU Crown collection with its reversible design, giving you two looks in one. Featuring a sleek black snakeskin-embossed brim lining and a bold outline Rattler emblem, this hat is all about repping your Rattler pride in style.
DungeonForward Savannah State University - HBCU Hat - TheYard
The Savannah State University HBCU Hat by DungeonForward is more than just a hat—it’s a symbol of Tiger pride and a nod to the culture. Perfect for gamedays, tailgates, or just showing off your HBCU love, this hat lets you carry a piece of the yard wherever you go.
Tech the Halls
Anker iPhone 16 Portable Charger, Nano Power Bank
Stay charged up with the Anker Nano Power Bank, which features dual USB-C ports, a foldable connector, and a compact design, making it perfect for those HBCU tailgates and late-night parties you pull up to.
Drip Check
Wisdom Frame 14 Square Sunglasses
Elevate your look with these angular square-frame sunglasses by Wisdom, bringing an ultramodern edge to any outfit. The sleek design makes them perfect for blocking out the haters while you stunt on the yard.
Coco and Breezy Eyewear Fortune in Gray Turquoise
The Fortune Glasses in Grey Turquoise is a bold statement piece to any Homecoming weekend ‘fit that “embody our fearless and outspoken DNA.” With their color and edgy design, these frames by Coco and Breezy are perfect for anyone looking to stand out and express their unapologetic confidence.
Howard U Lapel Pin
Rep your Bison pride wherever you go with this Howard U Lapel Pin from Pretty AmbVision. Whether adding it to your jacket, shirt, or bag, this pin is the perfect way to showcase your love for your alma mater while rocking your HBCU love with honor and distinction.
Mifland Standard Rucksack Mini
The Standard Rucksack is designed to evolve like that HBCU pride—getting richer, bolder, and better with time. Durable, stylish, and built to last, this Rucksack by Mifland is a timeless piece equipped with versatile carrying options and fully adjustable back straps for ultimate comfort.
Stay Fresh, Stay Blessed
Slip Pure Silk Sleep Mask in Pink
Keeping it cute starts with beauty sleep. This luxurious silk mask is an essential for a reason. If protecting your skin and waking up refreshed is your priority, look no further than this Homecoming essential.
Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier Lemon Lime - Hydration Powder Packets
Stay hydrated and energized throughout Homecoming weekend with this Liquid I.V.® Hydration Multiplier in Lemon Lime. Just add a packet to your water bottle, and bless your body with 2-3 times more hydration than water with every packet. Because staying hydrated is the key to popping up and showing out all weekend long!
Loop Experience Plus Earplugs High Fidelity Hearing Protection
Designed for your hearing protection, these sleek earplugs reduce noise without compromising sound quality—perfect for enjoying the band’s halftime show, late-night parties, and DJ sets. Whether you’re front row at the step show or hitting the yard, your ears deserve to be protected in style!
Black Girl Magic Glass Cup
Sip in style and celebrate your melanin with the Black Girl Magic Glass Cup. Perfect for morning coffee, your favorite iced drink, or showing off your HBCU pride on the yard—this cup is all about keeping it cute while radiating your endless supply of Black Girl Magic.
Glow Up & Show Out
Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30
What Homecoming weekend can be complete without an assist from this beauty find? Formulated to blend seamlessly into melanin-rich skin (no white-cast), protect your glow while you turn up with the Black Girl Sunscreen SPF 30.
Sienna Naturals Issa Rae's Wash Day Ritual Set
Issa Rae’s Wash Day Ritual Set from Sienna Naturals includes the H.A.PI. Shampoo, the Plant Power Repair Mask, Dew Magic, and Lock and Seal to get your crown right. Whether you’re repping your coils or rocking a new color on the yard, these products restore and nourish your strands, keeping your hair healthy, strong, and Homecoming-ready!
54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter
Stay glowing from the tailgate to the after-party with the 54 Thrones Ivorian Cocoa + Ghanaian Coconut Beauty Butter. Infused with African-sourced ingredients, this rich, multi-purpose butter is the answer to keeping your skin soft and radiant through all the festivities all Homecoming long.
Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil
Keep your lips looking luscious and nourished with the Saie Glossybounce Hydrating Lip Oil. Perfect for adding an extra pop to your pout before hitting the yard or freshening up between events, this lip oil is a beauty essential for staying camera-ready all weekend.
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image by Visual Vic/Getty Images
Nick Cannon Reflects On Insecurities That Led To The Demise Of His Marriage To Mariah Carey
Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey were once a lovey-dovey couple. They often looked very cozy during red carpet appearances, renewed their vows every year, and started a family by welcoming twins Moroccan and Monroe. But while they may have looked like couple goals on the surface, Nick revealed that he was dealing with insecurities in their relationship.
The Wild 'n Out host stopped by the Ray Daniels Presents podcast and reflected on the time he was married to the legendary vocalist.
"I didn't actually really care what the world thought because the perception, you know, that is what it is. People are going to love you one day, hate you the next day," he said. "I could care less about that. … But going to myself with that pressure of, 'Who am I?' "
Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage
He continued, "I got married in my 20s, you know what I mean? To the biggest star in the world. "My trajectory was here," he said, gesturing downwards, "and then hers — she's already in a different stratosphere."
The couple got married in 2008 after only dating for a few months and the actor instantly got immersed into Mariah's lavish lifestyle.
Nick admitted that he got "really comfortable with it." However, he was still questioning his manhood, especially after becoming a dad in 2011.
"I'm carrying a purse, the diaper bag and, you know, I'm standing on the corner like, 'Wait.' She's rocking being the alpha," he said.
He added, "I believe she needs a dude like that. I'm just not that dude."
His insecurities began to take a toll on his mental and physical health. The comedian said he was getting mad at himself and "had a gut." “It was like, ‘I’m not being the dude that God put me on this earth to be,” he shared.
However, Nick said he and Mariah never had any problems and that she empathized with what he was going through. Since their divorce in 2014, the former couple have seemingly stayed on good terms.
They both have shared some beautiful family moments together on social media, including celebrating their kids birthday in April.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by Ethan Miller/ Getty Images