As I gear up for my fifth competition this year, I've noticeably received a lot of comments on my glow and fit physique, not to mention how much healthier I seem overall.
I turn 38 this year, and I can say that I am extremely happy, fit, and healthy. But it hasn't always been that way.
My motivation to take better care of my health started back in 2014. I received a huge wake up call when my menstrual period went missing for five months. I was also experiencing mood swings, a lot of anxiety and I was extremely tired all of the time. During a visit to my doctor to address the issue, the physician assistant had a hard time reading my vitals, so they ran some blood work and tests. We later found out that I was dehydrated and not getting the right nutrition, making me deficient in the vitamins necessary to function in everyday life.
The reality of it was, I was a detriment to myself.
Chasing checks and attempting to stay at the top of my game as a celebrity blogger came with a cost. Back then, I was more focused on the grind than I was about properly nourishing myself. I was so busy, I'd go a whole day without a meal and barely noticed. When I did eat, my diet was loaded with processed high sodium meals, fast food, and sugar-filled carbonated drinks.
My doctor gave me a stern warning that I might not live a long life if I kept with my current routine. That hit me deep.
I was only 33 at the time. With parents that passed very early from health issues, (my mom was 41 and my dad was 42 at the time of their passing), and my grandparents had also passed from numerous health issues. I felt as though I was going down the same path.
I took a deeper look at my family history and obesity, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes, heart disease, and cancer plagued my family tree. I am a huge believer that we don't pass down diseases from generation to generation; we pass down the eating habits and lifestyles that lead to those diseases.
I knew if I wanted to live a healthier, longer life than that of my parents, I would have to change my lifestyle ASAP. Once I changed my diet and cut processed foods completely out, drank more water a day, and started going to the gym daily, quite a few things happened almost immediately:
- I had more energy throughout the day and was able to be more productive
- I had less instances of depression, anxiety, and stress, and my mood improved overall
- My menstrual cycle regulated itself, and I experienced no PMS or cramps during that time of the month
- My hair grew
- My skin became clear and blemish free
- I have a lot more stamina, strength, and endurance. There was a time I couldn't run for two minutes on a treadmill, I can now run for a full 25 minutes without crawling off.
This is why I am happy to get behind the American Heart Association. Recently, I read a statistic that was hard for me to digest.
49% of Black women over the age of 20 have some sort of heart disease and may not even know it. That means 1 out of 2 women reading this likely exhibit cardiovascular risk factors such as diabetes, obesity, high cholesterol, stress, or a poor diet.
I mean, yes, we're the fastest growing group of entrepreneurs and now the most educated group in the US, but at what cost? We are also more likely to die at an earlier age when compared to women of any other ethnicities.
Our superwoman complex is costing us our lives.
All of these accolades and achievements we are gaining means nothing if we won't be alive to enjoy them. It makes me wonder when the wealth of our health will be more valuable than the riches in our bank accounts.
80% of deaths caused by cardiovascular disease or cancer could have been prevented if a healthier lifestyle had been followed. I can tell you from the work I've done to prioritize wellness into my own life, a healthy lifestyle begins with a personal commitment to take care of our inner selves above all else. That means mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
When I first introduced wellness into my life, I changed within as I did physically. After that doctor's visit, I found ways to bring peace to my life and nourishment my spirit. For instance, I now have a morning routine. I no longer answer emails and check into social first thing in the morning. Starting my days stressed because I would check in with the world before I checked in with myself did nothing but ensure they ended even more stressfully. Now, I spend an hour in meditation and quietness before I plug in.
This practice alone has drastically changed my life by reducing my stress levels and setting me on a positive path each day.
It's small changes and habits like this that can help us make physical changes in our bodies.
And by physical changes, I don't mean anywhere near as intense as my fitness journey, rather, I'm actually referring to small day-to-day healthy choices that have the power to change our lives. Those are the ones that have the greatest impact when it comes to our health. Introducing more fruits and veggies to our meals and drinking more water. Decisions like taking the stairs versus the elevator. Going for 20-minute walks. Lack of physical activity is a significant contributor to risk factors for chronic diseases.
Recently, I stopped taking Uber to the gym and now walk there and back for a total of 2 miles. Instead of taking the subway closest to my building, I now walk 10 blocks to the next station to get extra steps in.
These changes sound small, but go a long way in lengthening our days on this earth.
As Black women, we must save some of our magic for our own selves. We cast spells that save elections, flourish companies, and shift the culture. Surely, our individual health is worthy of that same magic.
The American Heart Association website is a great resource to help educate us on how we can bring wellness into our everyday lives.
It goes further than the tips I gave, and lists other simple, yet effective ways to keep our hearts healthy. Clearly, this world will continue to need our magic. Let's do all we can to make sure we're alive to continue casting it.
Necole Kane is a retired celeb blogger, media mogul, and the founder of xoNecole.com and My Happy Flo. After spending 7 years as a successful celebrity gossip blogger, the Maryland native launched xoNecole.com with the mission to promote positive images of women of color as well as empower, educate, and inspire millennial women to live their best lives. Keep up with Necole on Instagram and Twitter @hellonecole, or through her personal website NecoleKane.com.
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Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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Feature image by Franco Zulueta
There's something about snuggling up in your favorite blanket and watching a comfort show or movie on Netflix, and what better time to do just that than in December? As the weather outside gets cooler, staying in becomes more of the norm. Thus, Netflix and Chill is a go-to. Luckily, Netflix has released new Black films and series on their popular streaming platform.
From Tyler Perry's historical drama The Six Triple Eight, starring Kerry Washington, to the Will Packer-produced comedy starring Marsai Martin, Regina Hall, and Issa Rae, Little, this season is looking up.
See the full list below.
Little (12/1)
Regina Hall's character is a bossy tech mogul who has everyone scared of her, including her assistant, played by Issa Rae. However, when she transforms into her younger self (Marsai Martin), she learns how to be more kind to others.
Daddy Day Care (12/1)
Eddie Murphy stars in this film as a father who decides to open a daycare after losing his job.
30 For 30 Collection (12/2)
30 For 30 is an ESPN docu-series highlighting some of sports' legendary figures and moments. Some of the episodes include Winning Time: Reggie Miller Vs. The New York Knicks and Celtics/ Lakers: The Best of Enemies.
Jamie Foxx: What Had Happened Was (12/10)
In this special, the multi-talented Jamie Foxx returns to stand-up to give an unforgettable performance.
Blood, Sweat & Heels S2 (12/13)
The short-lived Bravo reality TV series documented the lives of a group of girlfriends making it in NYC. The show starred model-turned-podcaster Melyssa Ford, author Demetria Lucas, and the late TV host Daisy Lewellyn.
The Equalizer S1-3 (12/16)
The hit CBS show starring Queen Latifah is now available on Netflix. Watch the beloved actress kick ass and take names in this popular drama.
The Six Triple Eight (12/20)
The new Tyler Perry film starring Kerry Washington is a true story about the first and only Women’s Army Corps unit of color during World War II.
Christmas Game Day Ravens Vs. Texans (12/25)
While many will tune in to watch the Baltimore Ravens vs. Houston Texans game, others will tune in to watch Beyoncé perform during halftime.
Michelle Buteau: A Buteau-ful Mind At Radio City Music Hall (12/31)
Comedian Michelle Buteau's comedy special will focus on her life with twins, going viral, and much more.
Evil S3 (12/31)
While Evil was unfortunately canceled by CBS, viewers can rewatch the series on Netflix, with season three premiering December 31st.
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Feature image screenshot/YouTube