Muni Long Opens Up About Domestic Violence: ‘You Don't Expect The Love Of Your Life To Turn Into Your Enemy’
Since leaving songwriting full-time to pursue her dream of being a singer, Muni Long has seen mainstream success. Her song “Hrs & Hrs” went viral during the pandemic and won her a Grammy, and since then, she has had everyone singing, “Twin, where have you been?” which are the lyrics to her song “Made For Me."
But while her star was rising, she was battling hardships in her personal life. In August, Muni released her new album, Revenge, and during her visit to The Terrell Show, she opened up about what inspired her recent music, particularly her song “Revenge."
“One song that just evokes a lot of emotion is the title track, “Revenge,” because I talk about some domestic violence there in the bridge. And I don't think a lot of people understand, like, I've been through a lot, and I just don't talk about it,” she revealed.
When asked how faith played a role during this turbulent time in her life, she shared how it was difficult as she was often told to just pray. “I’mma just say this, a lot of times, organized religion and old-school thinking will have you in bondage to some very misogynistic beliefs and ideals. And so a man can do wrong a million times, and you should forgive him because that is the blank thing to do, right? It's the right thing to do. It's the Christian thing to do, it's the feminine thing to do, it's the wife thing to do, right?” She explained.
Photo by Santiago Felipe/Getty Images
“But what about all this stress and drama and all that whatever, and him knocking me upside my [head?] How much of that should I take before a grown-up realizes that I'm out of control and I need to get help? There's only so much you can do for somebody who doesn't see the error in their ways. I was a little bit embarrassed that it was happening to me."
She continued, “I present myself as this very strong [person,] which I am, but when you got somebody that's like 200 pounds coming at you, it's nothing you can do. Yeah, you want to leave. They follow you. It's very, very nasty. I don't wish it on anyone. It's not that I didn't want to leave, but the way that my life was set up, you don't expect the love of your life to turn into your enemy.”
The mother of one made a plan, which included becoming a successful singer as a way to finally leave. Because, as she said, “I just knew, like, no one's coming to save you. It was me who walked down the aisle, so I'm gonna have to figure out how to get up out of this.”
Back in 2022, the “Ruined Me” singer revealed she had lupus, and in 2023, she shared that she was autistic and that repressing her autism led to her having lupus. While talking to Terrell, she said she hasn’t had any flair-ups since leaving her relationship. If you or you know someone dealing with domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (800)-799-7233 or text START to 88788.
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“One song that just evokes a lot of emotion is the title track, “Revenge,” because I talk about some domestic violence there in the bridge. And I don't think a lot of people understand, like, I've been through a lot, and I just don't talk about it,” she revealed.
When asked how faith played a role during this turbulent time in her life, she shared how it was difficult as she was often told to just pray. “I’mma just say this, a lot of times, organized religion and old-school thinking will have you in bondage to some very misogynistic beliefs and ideals. And so a man can do wrong a million times, and you should forgive him because that is the blank thing to do, right? It's the right thing to do. It's the Christian thing to do, it's the feminine thing to do, it's the wife thing to do, right?” She explained.
Photo by Santiago Felipe/Getty Images
“But what about all this stress and drama and all that whatever, and him knocking me upside my [head?] How much of that should I take before a grown-up realizes that I'm out of control and I need to get help? There's only so much you can do for somebody who doesn't see the error in their ways. I was a little bit embarrassed that it was happening to me."
She continued, “I present myself as this very strong [person,] which I am, but when you got somebody that's like 200 pounds coming at you, it's nothing you can do. Yeah, you want to leave. They follow you. It's very, very nasty. I don't wish it on anyone. It's not that I didn't want to leave, but the way that my life was set up, you don't expect the love of your life to turn into your enemy.”
The mother of one made a plan, which included becoming a successful singer as a way to finally leave. Because, as she said, “I just knew, like, no one's coming to save you. It was me who walked down the aisle, so I'm gonna have to figure out how to get up out of this.”
Back in 2022, the “Ruined Me” singer revealed she had lupus, and in 2023, she shared that she was autistic and that repressing her autism led to her having lupus. While talking to Terrell, she said she hasn’t had any flair-ups since leaving her relationship. If you or you know someone dealing with domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (800)-799-7233 or text START to 88788.
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London Alexaundria is the contributing editor for xoNecole. She is an alum of Clark Atlanta University, where she majored in Mass Media Arts and has worked in journalism for over ten years. You can follow her on Instagram and TikTok @theselfcarewriter
Your Guide To Letting Go Of What No Longer Serves You Based On Astrology
Letting go is a gift we are given and a strength that we find throughout our lives. There are times when we want to grab ahold of what we are experiencing and sensing, and times when we need to let go of something that was once everything to us or what we wanted for ourselves. The moment you conclude that you need to let something go in your life is the moment that your brain fights to make that happen for you.
In Astrology, there is an area of your birth chart that is designed for you to understand where you will be letting go a lot in this lifetime, and exactly how to do so. We dive through the birth chart as we seek a deeper understanding of ourselves and let go of what no longer serves us, and there are tools available to help us do so. If you don't know where your South Node is in your birth chart, you can use a free calculator like this one here.
What Does Your South Node Represent in Astrology?
When it comes to what we are destined to let go of or move away from in this lifetime, we look to the South Node. The South Node is the area of your birth chart that has to do with your past lives, karma, lessons, old habits and traits, gifts, and energy you are moving away from in this lifetime.
Your South Node is opposite your North Node, which is your destiny and the energy you want to move towards.
We can learn a lot from our South Node and it’s an area of our life where we tend to gain the most wisdom. By understanding why some patterns in your life tend to play out in the same ways, you can be more conscious of the choices you make in the now and let go of who and what doesn’t serve you in the process.
South Node Insights: Letting Go
The South Node is our natural gifts and talents, but also where we don’t need to focus so much of our energy on, taking us away from where we need to be developing, which is the North Node. So when you are looking to let go of something, gain a new perspective, or feel more trusting in what you are doing right now, you can examine your South Node.
We learn from our South Node by not making the same mistakes over again, letting go of what needs to be let go of, and understanding what we need in order to create space for our new beginning.
Read below for your South Node on how to let go of what no longer serves you.
Aries South Node: Letting Go of Independence for Connection
You are used to being independent and figuring things out on your own. In this lifetime, however, you are being asked to lean on others for support when you need it. You are working on letting go of the ego and focusing more on the heart. By extending your compassion for others, you discover a part of yourself that leads you toward empowerment and allows you to let go of a false sense of safety.
You are meant to experience harmonious, fortunate, and compatible love in this lifetime, and you will do so by opening your heart to others and letting go of people who don’t support you or whom you can’t count on.
Taurus South Node: Releasing Overdependence and Superficiality
With your South Node in Taurus, you are letting go of the need to acquire by focusing on the depth and intention of what you are obtaining. Your relationships tend to have a lot to do with your financial world, and these things can get twisted and distorted if you are not being careful.
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of what doesn’t serve you by following your heart and your intuition more and focusing more on the feeling you want for yourself rather than the things themselves. You are also working on letting go of overdependence or superficiality in relationships, by connecting with the people whom you have a deep and spiritual bond with.
Gemini South Node: Finding Freedom in Authenticity
For you, letting go means following your freedom. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime, and the less you can focus on how you are going to be perceived, the more you can live the life of your dreams. With a South Node in Gemini, you are moving away from the commotion of life. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is traveling, getting out of your comfort zone, and being in new environments.
In past lives, you may have given too much of your focus on your social successes and business pursuits, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on the bigger picture. What helps you let go is understanding that once you do, better is available to you.
Cancer South Node: Trusting Yourself Beyond Emotional Impulses
With a South Node in Cancer, you are learning to trust yourself and your logic more than your emotional world in this lifetime. By letting go of feeling like you have to be the one to nurture and support everyone and allowing people to do that for you, you lead your destiny.
With your South Node in Cancer, you are letting go of emotional impulsiveness or making decisions irrationally before you have thought about them.
In past lives, you were led by your emotional world, and in this lifetime, you are meant to think more about your long-term goals and intentions. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is knowing that you are more than what you can give to others.
Leo South Node: Prioritizing Community Over Recognition
In this lifetime, you are working on letting go of the need to be seen and recognized and focus more on your need for community and soul companionship. You are moving away from the “I” and moving closer to the “We.” What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is giving your focus to humanity, the progress you want to make in this lifetime, and who you want to make it with.
You are learning how to work with others and let go of the need to figure everything out yourself. The more you connect with the people who make you want to team up and form a relationship, rather than the people who make you want to be alone, the better for you.
Virgo South Node: Embracing Compassion Over Perfection
In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to do everything yourself and to have everything all together. You can let go of what no longer serves you by thinking more with your heart than you do with your mind and by trusting this gift of yours. By focusing more on your spirituality, emotional connections, and creativity, you let go of a timid side of you that can disrupt your relationships or the bonds you make.
In past lifetimes, you were focused on perfection. In this lifetime, you are meant to focus on compassion. By surrendering more to the flow of things, you can let go of what no longer serves you while remaining open for what does.
Libra South Node: Rediscovering Your Independence
With your South Node in Libra, you are meant to experience the gifts of independence, freedom, and inner clarity in this lifetime. In the past, you may have been more dependent on the people around you and made a lot of your focus on love. However, in this lifetime, you are being reminded to not lose your identity in others. You can let go of what no longer serves you by only moving towards the things that feel authentic to you.
You are meant to feel confident, inspired, and free in your relationships, and if you don’t feel this way, then that is a sign you are around energy that doesn’t serve you. You are meant to do things your own way in this lifetime.
Scorpio South Node: Letting Go of Struggles and Embracing Ease
With your South Node in Scorpio, you have lived many lives and have experienced a lot emotionally. In this lifetime, you are learning how to trust the process more and to understand that not everything has to be difficult or trying for you. You can experience great things with ease, and you’ll know you are in the right place when things are just falling into your lap.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is focusing more on the things and people who make you feel safe, stable, and comfortable. Instead of always seeking the rush or the thrill, bring your attention more towards the things that ground you.
Sagittarius South Node: Building Connection Through Learning
Your South Node in Sagittarius urges you towards connection with your community and your immediate environment. In this lifetime, you are letting go of the need to be everywhere at once, rather than with the people who matter most to you. You are moving away from knowing everything and into learning everything.
By looking at life as a place where you will learn, grow, and connect, you can let go of the things that stretch you too thin or don’t serve your heart.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is expressing yourself more, meeting new people, and spending time on a cause or creative project that inspires you.
Capricorn South Node: Choosing Home and Foundations Over Status
In this lifetime, you are meant to put more value and effort into your personal life, home, family, and foundations in life. In past lifetimes, a lot of your focus was on your reputation, achievements, and successes, and in this lifetime, you are meant to bring your energy more to the home base, family, and stability in life.
You will know if something is right for you if you want it because it makes you feel safe and nurtured, rather than just something that looks pleasing to the eye. What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is by focusing more on your personal life rather than your public, and what you truly see for yourself here.
Aquarius South Node: Shining in Your Individuality
With an Aquarius South Node, you are meant to shine, be seen, and express yourself in this lifetime. You are letting go of the lone wolf energy you are used to, and working on taking up space. You are able to let go of what no longer serves you by being confident in yourself and the decisions you are making.
If someone doesn’t make you feel like the best thing in the entire world, then they aren’t right for you. In past lifetimes, you gave a lot of your energy to your community and the people around you, and in this lifetime, you are meant to focus on yourself and your path more. It’s all about doing what makes you feel good and trusting that you deserve to.
Pisces South Node: Honoring Logic While Embracing Intuition
Your lesson in this lifetime is that your mind is your gift. In past lives, you were very intuitive, psychic, and spiritual, and in this lifetime, you are learning to trust and honor the logical part of yourself more. You may tend to put your all into your relationships and not get the same energy back, and you are working on taking care of yourself first before you can give to another.
What helps you let go of what no longer serves you is trusting your body and the signals it gives you when you are around certain people or energy that doesn’t serve. Get organized, figure out your needs, boundaries, and wants, and get clear on who you are and what you want for yourself.
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How Different Fruit Juices And Smoothies Can Actually Benefit Your Vagina
Lately, I’ve been thinking about dropping 10 pounds. And you know what — I know immediately what I can do to make it happen, damn near immediately: cut out fruit juice. Listen, even though there are benefits to fruit juice consumption (otherwise, there would be no need to write this article), I’d be totally irresponsible if I didn’t also put on record that the sugar in fruit juice can definitely help you to pack on the calories if you’re not careful.
Just think about it — if you purchase a carton of juice that says each serving is 120 calories per eight-ounce glass, and you have three or four of those bad boys over the course of one day, you’ve just downed 360-480 calories alone. So yeah, if anything needs to be consumed in moderation, fruit juice would be it (although, for the record, some of the juices that contain the least amount of sugar include cranberry, papaya, orange, pomegranate, and tart cherry juice, and, by far, 100 percent fruit concentrate is best because it’s commercial brand juice in its purest form).
However, let’s also keep in mind that 1) not all juices are created equal (for instance, using a juicer to make your own is going to be better for you, for sure; 2) fruit juice can help to hydrate, detoxify and energize you, and 3) there are nutrients in fruit juice that can do your body some real good…so long as you don’t overdo it. And today, we’re going to tackle 10 that are good for your vagina, especially so.
Are you ready to learn about which juices (and smoothies) will bless your va-jay-jay in a mighty way?
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1. Apple Juice
When it comes to juices that also don’t contain a ton of sugar, it might surprise you that apple makes the list when you stop to think about how sweet it actually is. And whether it’s the high amount of fiber that apples contain, the pectin that’s in it that will help to keep your gut healthy, the fact that apples are easily made up of at least 80 percent water, or the fact that this is a fruit that has properties in it that help to reduce inflammation, apple juice can benefit your vagina on a few different levels. The more healthy bacteria that are in your gut, the greater your chances are of avoiding a yeast infection, and the more hydrated your system is, the more natural lubrication your vagina will have.
2. Avocado Smoothie
Whenever you decide to puree fresh fruits and/or veggies in a blender, what you typically end up with is a smoothie. Smoothies can be good for you because they can be a quick and easy way to pack a lot of nutrients in one serving. That said, another way to boost your vaginal health is to treat yourself to an avocado smoothie (and yes, avocados are a fruit).
One of the best things about avocados is the fact that they are basically a superfood thanks to the impressive amount of nutrients that are in them, including protein, fiber, vitamins B, C, E, K, folate, copper, magnesium, and potassium. Avocados are also another fruit that is good at maintaining gut health, and they’re packed with antioxidants, too.
Vitamin B is helpful if you’re looking for an all-natural way to combat vaginal dryness (so is vitamin E). Copper can help to reduce the appearance of premature gray pubic hairs. Magnesium is awesome because it helps to reduce symptoms that are associated with PMS, menopause, and even PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome). Antioxidants are what help to keep (vaginal) infections at bay.
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3. Cranberry Juice
A ton of water and fiber are in cranberries. Not only that, but they have some vitamin A, vitamin E, and copper in them as well. The reasons why (pure) cranberry juice is top-notch in the vaginal health department is because it contains chemical compounds known as polyphenols that help to fight off UTIs (urinary tract infections), they can keep your blood vessels healthy (which helps to improve and intensify orgasms), and the vitamin C that’s also in it can help your body to produce more collagen which can keep your vagina youthful for a longer period of time (check out “Keep Your Vagina Like A (Literal) Fountain Of Youth”).
4. Mango Juice
If, like me, you enjoy a good mango sans all of the stringiness — a great alternative is mango juice. Every time you enjoy a glass, you can feel good about the fact that you are getting quite a bit of fiber, vitamin C, copper, folate, vitamin A, and vitamin E into your system. Vitamin A is cool because it will help to boost your immunity (which means fewer vaginal infections), and the folate can help to reduce your chances of being diagnosed with HPV (human papillomavirus).
Something else to keep in mind about mangoes is they can help to keep your skin and hair healthy — which is also relevant when it comes to maintaining vaginal health (check out “Vaginas Age Just Like Everything Else. You Can Slow It Down, Though.”).
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5. Pineapple Juice
If the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of pineapples and what they can do for your vagina is they make it taste better, I actually touch on that in the article, “10 Ways To Have An 'Extra Sweet' Vagina.” The reality is nothing can make your vagina taste like a fruit smoothie (because it wasn’t designed to); however, there are certain foods that can cause your secretions to be more…pleasant to the palate than others — and yes, pineapples are one of them.
Some other reasons why your vagina will appreciate you consuming pineapple juice is because an enzyme in it known as bromelain helps to promote tissue healing (including vaginal tissue that may be irritated). Plus, there are nutrients in pineapple that also reduce inflammation, and the off-the-charts amount of vitamin C that is in it will reduce your chances of experiencing recurring BV (bacterial vaginosis) while also helping to keep your pH levels and vaginal odor in check.
6. Lemonade
At the end of the day, lemonade is simply a mixture of lemons, water, and whatever sweetener you choose to use — and that’s why it also makes this list. You already know that the water in lemonade will help to keep your vagina nice and hydrated, so let’s focus on the lemons for a moment.
Without question, lemons are packed with vitamin C, which helps to synthesize sexual hormones like testosterone, estrogen, and progesterone. Something else that’s dope about lemons is they can help your body absorb iron better.
Vaginally, this is relevant because there is a direct link between iron deficiency and bacterial vaginosis.
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7. Banana Smoothie
Let’s tackle another smoothie. Fiber, potassium, vitamin C, and antioxidants are all found in bananas, and all of these nutrients work together in order to improve your blood sugar levels, keep your digestive system in good shape, and give you energy. Potassium is great for your vagina because it helps to keep your vaginal muscles (i.e., your pelvic floor) from weakening, and the energy boost can definitely help your libido if your mind is in the mood more than your body may be after being completely worn out from the demands of the day.
8. Peach Juice
As far as taste goes, peaches are one of my all-time favorite fruits, so it’s really just a bonus that they are really good for my (and your) health and well-being. Aside from being a pretty good source of vitamins A and C, peaches also help to reduce allergy-related symptoms (which, yes, can sometimes lead to vaginal inflammation), can help to boost your immune system (so that you experience less vaginal infections), and they can keep your blood sugar at reasonable levels so that you end up with fewer yeast infections.
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9. Grapefruit Juice
Now, before I get into this one, I do think that I should give you a heads-up that if you are taking a form of birth control that has estrogen in it, ask your doctor if you should drink grapefruit juice. The reason why I say that is science has proven that sometimes grapefruit juice can impact the levels of estrogen in the body (the more you know). Beyond that, though, grapefruit juice can be good for your vagina because it boosts immunity, is great for your skin’s health and well-being, can help to reduce inflammation, and will also deeply hydrate your system.
10. Berry Smoothie
Berry smoothies are delicious, and so it’s simply the icing on the cake that your vagina will benefit from them. Aside from the vitamin C and fiber that is also in them, it’s important to take note of the plant compounds that raspberries, blueberries, and raspberries have because many of them mimic estrogen, which can be helpful if you’re someone who is in the latter stage of perimenopause and you’re looking for an all-natural form of relief. Another dope thing about berries is the antioxidants in them can help to decrease oxidative stress, which ultimately reduces your chances of having a vaginal infection.
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I don’t know about you, but I’m always interested in finding out things that will help to keep my vagina in optimal condition. So, if juice is one of your favorite life pleasures, again, so long as you don’t drink an entire carton (or bottle) in one sitting, know that your vagina will enjoy a glass of these 10 options just as much as you will. And isn’t that a delicious thing to know? Absolutely.
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