Earlier this year, R&B singer and reality TV star, Monica, filed for divorce from her husband, Shannon Brown and had the internet shook. Their whirlwind romance began in June of 2010 when the NBA star played the romantic interest in her music video for "Love All Over Me", and only five months later, the two were married in a secret ceremony in Los Angeles.
After nearly a decade, the couple have now decided to call it quits, and according to Monica, their split has been fairly amicable. Despite the 38-year-old entertainer's recent history of being fairly private about her personal life, she's taken a much different approach when it came to this season of The Family Hustle. The "So Gone" singer stopped by The Wendy Williams Show and got real about navigating life after loss and how she manages living in the same house as the man she's divorcing.
Anyone who's ever experienced grieving a relationship knows that the process is never easy, and unfortunately, Monica has had to do it publicly. Along with being a world-renowned songstress and mother-of-three, she also had to deal with criticism from people who really didn't even know her situation:
"The reality show started taking place before the divorce did, let's be clear, or I would not have gone on. Flat out. This is not something I could have predicted, and I'm highly offended when people ask me, 'is that storyline for the show'? I've never in 24 years have done anything for a show. I've never sold anything that wasn't true. I don't play like that."
She went on to say that she continued to film the show even after things got rocky in her life to stay true to herself and avoid compromising her integrity. She told Wendy:
"Had that been going on, I would not have been on the show, but since I was already there and I had made a commitment not only to myself but to two of my very close friends. You don't walk away just because something's happening with you. I'm not on the show alone."
Although this may have been one of the most confusing points in her life, Monica says that her divorce has also given her clarity. She explained that she and her husband still share a home while working out legal proceedings and their communication has been ever:
"It sometimes takes difficult things to lead you to where you need to be. And it was some conversations that needed to be had and some communication that needed to be had. That's what brought us together, so it really opened up the dialogue in the house. We're not feuding or beefing or anything, at all."
Contrary to popular belief, not all breakups have to be bitter, and according to Monica, her relationship with her ex is far from it. While in relationships, we have a tendency to bite our tongues to preserve the feelings of our partners, but when we are separated, we have the freedom to let it all hang out. She explained:
"It's really been peaceful because both of us are comfortable with speaking, you understand? Sometimes it gets too quiet, and it had gotten too quiet. You get to nine years, we made it through some of the trenches. So, now we're communicating."
This soul-singing songstress also noted that due to the responsibility of being a full-time mom, CEO with an international audience, she'll be putting her hot girl summer on hold until next year, but until then, she's adapting to life after love by trying new recipes, and we are here for it.
When's the potluck, sis?
Watch the full clip below!
Monica's New Beginning www.youtube.com
Featured image via The Wendy Williams Show
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Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and Skylar
Cj Hart @hartbreak
Today, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak