As a solo female traveler, I receive lots of questions, and a main one is, "How do I make friends when traveling?" In July, I sold my belongings to start my journey as a digital nomad. Since then, I have visited Cabo, Mexico City, Oaxaca, Playa del Carmen, Tulum, Aruba, Curacao, and Dubai. And that's just in the past six months!
Before I left home, one of my main fears was that I wouldn't make friends. Even as an extrovert, I dread small talk and shallow relationships. I was nervous that traveling full-time would leave no room for deep connections and that I would only have fleeting moments with random people I'd meet.
However, as my journey continues, I've realized that I am never truly alone. We are all more alike than we are different and we all have a desire for deep friendship. If you put yourself out there, you'll find your tribe.
I attended an Alicia Keys concert in Dubai solo and ended up singing and dancing the night away with a group of girls I met there. I stayed in a co-living space in Mexico City for three months and found an incredible community of people to share my time with there. In Oaxaca, I traveled solo and met a group of people at a party, and the following weekend we all met up in Tulum. I love serendipitous moments like these.
Solo travel opens the doors of infinite possibilities to make meaningful connections, so release your defenses, drop all the agendas and show up fully as yourself.
Here are 5 tips for making friends abroad:
1. Be open to new things or unexpected moments.
As a solo traveler, it's completely OK to feel out of place. You are in a new country or destination, after all! Don't be so hard on yourself if you don't hit it off right away with the first few people you meet. Have an open mind about the relationships you are forming and release the pressure. Some friendships might be seasonal, while some might develop into lifelong connections. You are not in control of the outcome, so be open and put yourself out there with no expectations.
2. Utilize social media.
It's called "social" media for a reason. Search for meet-up groups that align with your interests. Join Facebook travel groups, and don't be afraid to shoot your friendship shot in the DMs. Download WhatsApp. I didn't use this platform much before traveling, but it's one of the main apps I use to stay connected to people and find out about cool events happening nearby.
3. Go on free walking tours.
I love free walking tours because they provide you with so much history and context about the country. They're fun and a laid-back way to meet people who are also new to the city. Also, signing up for experiences on Airbnb will allow you to meet people with the same interests as you. You are usually more approachable and likely to connect with people when you show up solo.
4. Choose accommodations wisely.
With remote work and travel gaining more and more popularity, many companies are catering to the needs of travelers. Instead of staying in a hotel, try looking into different co-living spaces and even hostels. One co-living website that I used is called Outsite, and there are other similar options such as WifiTribe, and Remote Year.
5. Step outside your comfort zone.
You have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Strike up a conversation first, even if you stumble over your words, and keep going. One of the best things about traveling is meeting new people and broadening your perspective. The world is waiting to meet you!
Featured image by wagnerokasaki/Getty
Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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Feature image by Franco Zulueta
There's something about snuggling up in your favorite blanket and watching a comfort show or movie on Netflix, and what better time to do just that than in December? As the weather outside gets cooler, staying in becomes more of the norm. Thus, Netflix and Chill is a go-to. Luckily, Netflix has released new Black films and series on their popular streaming platform.
From Tyler Perry's historical drama The Six Triple Eight, starring Kerry Washington, to the Will Packer-produced comedy starring Marsai Martin, Regina Hall, and Issa Rae, Little, this season is looking up.
See the full list below.
Little (12/1)
Regina Hall's character is a bossy tech mogul who has everyone scared of her, including her assistant, played by Issa Rae. However, when she transforms into her younger self (Marsai Martin), she learns how to be more kind to others.
Daddy Day Care (12/1)
Eddie Murphy stars in this film as a father who decides to open a daycare after losing his job.
30 For 30 Collection (12/2)
30 For 30 is an ESPN docu-series highlighting some of sports' legendary figures and moments. Some of the episodes include Winning Time: Reggie Miller Vs. The New York Knicks and Celtics/ Lakers: The Best of Enemies.
Jamie Foxx: What Had Happened Was (12/10)
In this special, the multi-talented Jamie Foxx returns to stand-up to give an unforgettable performance.
Blood, Sweat & Heels S2 (12/13)
The short-lived Bravo reality TV series documented the lives of a group of girlfriends making it in NYC. The show starred model-turned-podcaster Melyssa Ford, author Demetria Lucas, and the late TV host Daisy Lewellyn.
The Equalizer S1-3 (12/16)
The hit CBS show starring Queen Latifah is now available on Netflix. Watch the beloved actress kick ass and take names in this popular drama.
The Six Triple Eight (12/20)
The new Tyler Perry film starring Kerry Washington is a true story about the first and only Women’s Army Corps unit of color during World War II.
Christmas Game Day Ravens Vs. Texans (12/25)
While many will tune in to watch the Baltimore Ravens vs. Houston Texans game, others will tune in to watch Beyoncé perform during halftime.
Michelle Buteau: A Buteau-ful Mind At Radio City Music Hall (12/31)
Comedian Michelle Buteau's comedy special will focus on her life with twins, going viral, and much more.
Evil S3 (12/31)
While Evil was unfortunately canceled by CBS, viewers can rewatch the series on Netflix, with season three premiering December 31st.
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