

Heavy periods, weight gain, mood changes, pain, and acne. Sounds like normal symptoms of that dreaded time of the month, right? Maybe. But it actually could be more than that. It could also be symptoms of a hormonal disorder called polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). PCOS is a condition that affects a woman's ovaries. Women who have PCOS often experience irregular periods (infrequent or prolonged) due to PCOS' effect on the reproductive hormones. Doctors aren't exactly sure what causes PCOS and in fact many women don't even know they have it and often chalk the symptoms they are experiencing up to menstrual cycle symptoms.
PCOS affects women of all races and ethnicities who are of reproductive age. In fact, one study's findings "suggests that there are no racial or ethnic influences on the prevalence of PCOS." So, while black women are not necessarily more prone to PCOS, they are often misdiagnosed or misunderstood. "Most of my PCOS warriors are white or Hispanic. I've found that black women have had trouble with their diagnosis. They have no idea that they have it. In the black community, a lot of us aren't even aware of what PCOS is or how to support each other. But as an overall community, we are being recognized more, and more women are doing their research and finding fellow PCOS sisters. We're finding out how to change this stigma of people brushing it off like it's not real," said Alicia W. shared with xoNecole.
September is PCOS Awareness Month and women like Alicia, Mieko, and Tanny are doing their part to educate and bring awareness of the disorder, all while educating women on PCOS. Check out their stories below.
Alicia W.
I remember having severe cramps, like I was on my cycle. Not too long after, I began to think something was wrong. I was trying to Google what was wrong with me until the pain got out of control. It got so bad my boyfriend took me to the emergency room. After arriving at the hospital, I was told that a cyst had ruptured and I was given the diagnosis of PCOS. Before then, I knew something felt a little weird and a little off.
"I was experiencing period symptoms, but they were happening without a period and they were coming more frequently than my period was coming. I brushed off all of those symptoms. I never thought to look into PCOS because I was going to my OB/GYN every year and it never came up."
In terms of treatment, I have been on just about everything you can possibly imagine. So, initially when they diagnosed me, they told me that all I needed to do was lose weight. No medicine, no nothing. I ended up dealing with the same symptoms for two years. I came home and started going to my current OB/GYN. I tried Metformin and it was horrible. It was not for me. It made me sick every time. I even tried to take it off and on along with birth control. But with birth control, my hair growth, also known as hirsutism, was getting worse. I was getting cystic acne and having more pain.
What I'm doing now is Ovasitol. I just started this year and it has been what works best for me by far. It's amazing. Ovasitol is a powder supplement. You mix it in your water or whatever drink you choose. It helps to level out hormones, control cravings, and regulate your cycle. I still have symptoms, but they are more manageable. The only thing you can't really reverse is the hair growth. That's the only thing that has not been managed. Literally after a month of Ovasitol (even without taking it regularly), my period came back after six months of not having one. I also take Goli gummies as well, just as an additional vitamin to help give me some energy in the morning.
"I hope that more black women feel empowered to talk to their doctors about PCOS. As black women, we are completely overlooked because we are traditionally heavier or have more curves. We are immediately told to lose weight which is not the answer for everyone. When we tell them about our symptoms, they attribute it to needing to lose weight. They rarely look into anything else."
One day, I put a little quiz on my Instagram story for women to take to see if they have PCOS symptoms. I received about 35 DMs from black women saying, "Oh my God, I think I have PCOS!" I was thinking what in the world is happening when these women are going to see their doctors? My advice to other women would be to ask questions and be sure they are listening to their bodies. I would also encourage other women to raise awareness because there are so many women out there going through the same thing.
To continue following Alicia's journey, be sure to follow her @lelestyleme.
Mieko B.
After about two years of my partner and I trying to conceive, I finally made an appointment with my OB/GYN and expressed to him my concern of not conceiving. My periods were usually normal. Every now and then, they would be three to five days late but I didn't think too much of it and I also would get painful cramps and heavier cycles with larger than usual blood clots. I also noticed the last few years I've been getting more unwanted body hair which was pretty embarrassing. I even found myself hiding it from my partner.
"It did take a few appointments, bloodwork, HSG, and then finally my laparoscopic and hysteroscopy procedure for my doctor to finally say that it was PCOS. It seemed like my doctor did not want to diagnose me before getting all of those tests done but after doing research myself and matching up some symptoms, that's when I pretty much self-diagnosed myself."
Since I was only diagnosed a month ago, so far I've mainly been focusing on regulating my diet, being that I want to tackle this the most natural way possible. I've cut down on my sugars and white flour. I've increased my omega-3 intake and other supplements. I've also increased the amount of light exercises I do and added more stretching to my regimen.
After being diagnosed with PCOS, the effects have been more emotional than physical. Although I do have physical symptoms more around ovulation and my period, it doesn't affect me as much as the mental side. The emotions of knowing that I have been diagnosed with this and that it will take me more effort to finally conceive, it has become a bit discouraging and I tend to blame myself.
"Every month, for pretty much the past two years, I cry every time my period comes and this was even before officially being diagnosed because I just knew something was wrong. I do feel that I am more prone to have mood swings and I have a major shift in my emotions and little things make me cry easily now."
My words of advice to other black women living with PCOS is to stay strong! When you're dealing with something so personal, you tend to question why this is happening to you. Never blame yourself or beat yourself up over this diagnosis, try your best to come up with a regimen that will specifically help you and your symptoms and stick to it. Most importantly, remember that you are not alone.
To continue following Mieko's journey, follow her @Scxbanx.
Tanny B.
I experienced a wrath of vaginal and hormonal issues that had an impact on my health. I was extremely anxious, moody, had a low libido, dry scalp, skin problems, my periods were irregular or would appear for more than 14 days, and one of the biggest detectors for me was consistent vaginitis due to my hormone imbalances.
"I went from WAP to DAP, had a painful vagina, and recurrent bacterial vaginosis no matter what I did to cure it. I tried at-home remedies, over-the-counter drugs, I even meditated on my vagina but nothing worked."
I visited several physicians until I found one with the patience to investigate my health problems. I was diagnosed with PCOS in 2017, after an extensive hormone and blood test which showed disproportionate hormones and excess in androgen. To this day, it is rare to find a physician to diagnose and provide real PCOS advice. I didn't receive any advice or helpful info after my diagnosis.
After I received my diagnosis, I wasted no time to do my own research on how I could improve my symptoms. At the moment, I take several vitamins and supplements to improve my well-being and fight PCOS symptoms. Myo & D-Chiro Inositol, Vitamin D, Omega-7, a probiotic, a multivitamin, and maca root powder, to name a few. I've realized it's so important to stay active and maintain a PCOS-friendly diet.
I cope with my PCOS roller coaster by venting through my blog vtalksgyn.com. It's the best way to connect with other women and to let other black women know that they are not alone in the fight. I also struggle with low libido which has a direct affect on both my mental and sexual health. For a long time, I had no sexual confidence because I felt like my vagina just didn't work. Throughout the years of experimenting with various supplements, products, foods, and birth control, my symptoms are kept at bay by staying true to my daily regimen. I have a strong support system of friends who work to understand my journey which makes my day-to-day hardships just a little easier.
"When I received the news that I had PCOS, I cried for an entire week and had absolutely no guidance. In my mind, it meant I would never have children and that my vagina was broken. One day, I decided that I would not be defeated by my disorder."
I want to scream, "PCOS is not the final destination!" Take control of your symptoms and become stronger than your excuses! Take one day at a time, listen to your body, and do what makes you feel best. We have to support one another and continue to have these types of conversations so none of us feel alone.
To continue to follow Tanny's journey, be sure to follow her @Vtalksgyn.
Featured image by Shutterstock
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Erica Green is a Clinical Research Associate, blogger, and a sneakerhead. She has a love for all things women and she's pretty sure that women are God's greatest creation. Connect with her on Instagram @ erica_britt_ or www.lovethegspot.com
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
I’ve gotta say that, for the most part, my friends are pretty damn chill. There is one (major) exception, though — and it’s an odd one. Even after all these years and countless times of me giving them the same answer, if there is a time when they think they are my mama, it’s when they see an email come through at an odd hour of the night. Then, all of a sudden, here they come asking me when do I get sleep if I’m emailing at (say) three in the morning.
Again, the answer never changes because, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna get, it’s 6-8 (sometimes nine) hours of sleep. However, since my chronotype (check out “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”) means that I like/prefer to write in the wee hours of the morning, sometimes I will sleep for the night for five hours and take a nap in the day. And y’all, that is just fine with me because I am well aware of the fact that napping does everything from give me more energy, heighten my alertness and even make me more creative to decrease stress levels, strengthen immunity, and reduce my chances of experiencing a heart attack or stroke.
My problem is I will oftentimes go “overboard” with my daytime zzz’s. What I mean by that is, in order to get the most out of a nap, they say thatyou shouldn’t sleep for longer than 25 minutes or so; otherwise, you could wake up feeling sluggish (I don’t but…). Also, it can make resting, soundly, at night a bit of a struggle.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? We should get quickies in? Yeah. And it’s funny that the word “quickie” would come up because just like a sex quickie can do wonders for you (and it can — check out “12 Super Solid Reasons To Have A Quickie Every Single Day”), it’s a full-circle moment when I say that something that can improve the quality of your sex life is to have a power nap (a nap that lasts between 10-30 minutes).
Wanna know how the two things correlate? Honestly, it’s no secret that sleep and sex work together to optimize both (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”). Today, though, we’re going to tap into how a nap, specifically, can have you partaking in some of the best sex that you’ve experienced in a minute. I’ll explain.
Naps Reduce Stress
If you’re feeling super stressed out right now, you are not alone. There is plenty of data out here that says that most of us are stressed for at least a couple of reasons at a time — and that can impact your sexual health on a few levels. For one thing, it can bring about feelings of depression and/or anxiety. Stress can also throw your hormone levels off (including your cycle) which can weaken your libido. Stress can make you want to put distance between you and your partner (yes, literally).
Stress can also make it challenging to get aroused or to have an orgasm. And just what can help to decrease stress? Taking a nap. Since sleep has a way of helping you to “get off of the clock” and relax a bit, that can lower your stress levels and “reset” your body so that you are calmer — and that, in turn, can do wonders for your sex drive and ultimately your sex life.
Naps Improve Your Mood
There is one person in my life, and fairly 80 percent of the time, she’s in a super good mood. Oh, but let that girl go without sleep, and…who is this woman? LOL. There’s research behind why this happens. When a person is sleep-deprived, it messes with their brain chemicals, and that can amplify emotions like anger, restlessness and sadness. In fact, one study revealed that people who had their sleep disrupted throughout the night, they ended up having their positive outlook on life reduced by about 30 percent.
And geeze, who wants to have sex when they’re not feeling very good? Anyway, since serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps to regulate your moods, your sleep patterns, and your libido and sleep is what helps to keep it in balance — by taking a nap, not only can it help you to feel better, it can also increase your desire for sex (it can also build up your endurance which is also…sexually beneficial).
Naps Increase Your Focus and Concentration
Something that some of my clients bring up is how, when it comes to having sex, sometimes the flesh is willing while the spirit is weak because, although the desire for intimacy is there, so much is going on that they aren’t able to get still enough to focus on experiencing copulation with their partner. This also tracks because, when you don’t have enough rest, your brain finds itself not working in harmony and that can make it hard to do everything from approaching life with a sense of flexibility to making necessary decisions.
Certain data also reveal that a lack of rest can cause you to have a really poor attention span and not process things in context (the more you know). So, if you really want to get some yet it’s hard for you to focus long enough to make it happen, ask your bae to lie down with you and take a nap. Between the sleep and the snuggling (check out “Fall's Coming: 8 Wonderful Health Benefits Of Cuddling”) — you may wake up with your mind and body totally on the same page. #wink
Naps Can Make You Feel Better About Your Body
Even if, overall, you feel really good about your body, I think that we all have moments when we feel less attractive than others — and who wants to have sex when they don’t really feel…very sexy? Well, something else that sleep, in general, can do is increase your confidence in your body.
For one thing, if you want to lose a few pounds, sleep can actually make that happen by helping your body metabolize the glucose (sugar) that’s in it so that you can better manage your appetite. Other studies go on to share that since sleep deprivation can impact one’s mental health and emotional stability in a negative way, of course, getting enough rest would increase body positivity.
Shoot, science even goes so far as to say that insomnia can cause people to have an elevated level of dissatisfaction when it comes to their body image. Don’t take their word for it, though. Look in the mirror before a nap. Then look in a mirror after waking up from me. Do you feel better? I’d be surprised if you don’t.
Makes Your Brain Bigger…Which Could Make Your Orgasms Better
I saved the best for last by design. Now if you’re wondering how in the world a nap can improve (and possibly increase) your orgasms — oh, there is a method to the madness…trust. For starters, the saying that your biggest sex organ is your brain? That isn’t a myth. Long story less long, the brain is what houses your central nervous system and that is what controls how men and women sexually function (yes, literally).
And since the brain also releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin during sex and brain activity significantly increases in women during sexual activity (especially right before she orgasms) — well, would it trip you out to know that when you take a nap, your brain actually expands? A bigger brain (that’s healthy) can potentially intensify your sexual experiences (and your climaxes) — and who doesn’t want that to go down?
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Like I said earlier, I never have to be convinced to get a nap in. However, if your sex life has been a bit stagnant lately, you’ve been feeling a little sluggish and you’re not sure what to do — I’m hoping that a nap can get you right.
There’s enough science to prove that it can. All you need to do is give it a shot.
Now where’s your pillow and sleep mask, chile?
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Featured image by FG Trade/Getty Images