The first time I saw the video for TLC's "Unpretty", I watched it repeatedly. It resonated with me because it was the narrative so deeply embedded in my black girl psyche. I, like many other women, have struggled with maintaining a positive self-image, inspiring a culture that encourages dangerous surgeries that require painful recoveries.
Cardi B, who credits her rise to the top to her investment in her image, recently toldGQ that she decided to get butt injections four years ago after developing an insecurity fueled by her personal and professional lives. The risky black market operation, which left her dizzy and in tremendous pain, was performed by a shadetree surgeon. Cardi's painful experience is a reality that is increasingly relevant to women of color in this day and age.
It's the same reality that celebs like K. Michelle and Jenelle Salazar Butler (popularly known as Get Bodied By J) are also opening up about. These women are speaking their truths about the societal pressures that drove them to seek physical augmentations, a dangerous trend made extremely popular among women of color in the entertainment industry over the last decade. The celebrities' recent admissions shed light on an industry that exploits black bodies and employs a deadly insecurity among black women.
Society has spoken, and big booties are the wave.
This fact leaves many women of color in the limelight to compare and question their natural bodies, especially when their shapes don't reflect the "ideal black body type." This deadly insecurity has caused more and more women to seek alternative methods of reaching their beauty goals, including detox tea, waist trainers, and one of the latest trends, minimally invasive cosmetic surgery.
In 2016, the American Society of Plastic Surgeons announced that butt implants were the fastest growing type of plastic surgery and can cost upwards of $10,000, causing many women who cannot afford the procedure to seek out back alley operations that consist of placing silicone in their butts or other materials like hydrogel or bi-polymer. And while the result can present women with the asses that they're after, K. Michelle might be a glimpse of the host of complications that Instagram bodies can come with.
Last year, K. Michelle opened up on The Real about how her trouble with men led her to develop a negative self-image that she felt she could resolve with cosmetic surgery.
"I had a big ass. I already had one. I was insecure. I was like, 'I want a big ass, I want some titties, I want some teeth. This is what I wanna do.'"
The R&B singer continued on to discuss the pain she felt after the cosmetic surgery as a result of her body rejecting the injections. She said that over time, the surgeries began to affect her overall health, causing her to be extremely fatigued.
She explained that she began aching to a point where she could no longer walk and decided that it was time for a change.
"I just did it. It felt good. It was a temporary bandage on some issues with me, and it felt good at the moment. Now I just want to be me, who my mama made me."
Last year, she announced her decision to have her butt injections removed, but the process has not been easy. A tearful K. Michelle recently went live on Instagram during a blood transfusion in an effort to document her recovery. In the live video the Love and Hip Hop alum said tearfully:
"I've been sick. I'm doing better. So I love y'all, so much. It's been so rough. I've had blood transfusions, everything. It's been a really rough week. But I thank y'all for everything. I'm ok. I'm crying because I'm happy. I'm not crying because I'm sad. It's been so painful. It's been a lot. So I just thank God that I made it out on the other side."
Although she had undergone surgery in January to remove her butt implants, K had undergone complications despite her initiative to take the necessary steps to get her health and her body back right. In a lengthy Instagram post, she got transparent about just how traumatic her journey to getting her body back has been:
"January 12, I started a journey to correct a mistake I did over 6 years ago. The first surgery went well, so we thought, until my body started to shut down while I was on tour. For 26 cities, I was on steroids to walk and keep down infection, causing me to get off stage and be rushed to ER over 4 times and then the next day back on stage. I later found out the silicone had spread and I would be rushed back into surgery."
"Last Wednesday, I entered surgery barely functioning with my legs and an infection. The surgery to remove all of this from me lasted a long 6 hours. The following days were spent with paramedics until they realized my blood count was severely low and I was rushed into [the] ER where I was admitted. 2 blood transfusions later, I've been released and started therapy today [to] heal and walk. I have the most skilled and amazing reconstructive surgeon in Beverly Hills and I'm blessed to be here. It hurts my heart to know there are girls out here who can't afford to have the best and are just sitting around in pain and infection. I thought I was strong but this changed my life. I saw my life flash right in front of me."
"Rough" is an understatement and her journey is only a glimpse of what the reality of her and women like her have and will go through as a result of a decision based on a temporary fad.
It takes so much bravery to publicly confront the consequences of ripping the bandaid off of the insecurities that make us feel so damn unpretty. Fitness guru and self-love advocate Get Bodied by J has also opened up about her painful recovery process after having her butt injections removed in attempt to educate others. In one of her videos she said:
"If I had self-love in 2010, I would have never done this."
Both celebrities have been extremely candid throughout their healing processes and hope to prevent other women from making the decision that led to this ultra painful period in their life. K. Michelle said in an interview with Steve Harvey:
"Everybody was doing it. A lot of your favorite artists, we went to the same person. They're sick too, but I just talk about mine. I don't lie to y'all. I don't tell y'all, 'Oh, this is great!' It'll catch up. So I said, if I can show them my body, and what I did, I can also show them the outcome and the consequences of it. So I've been very open about it."
K. Michelle mentioned how easy it is to get swept up in following beauty trends, no matter what the cost, even if they happen to be deadly. Women like Get Bodied by J and K. Michelle have chosen to share their experiences to inspire positive self-image in other women and to remind them that nothing about them has to be artificial for them to be beautiful.
For generations, society has imposed their standards of beauty to exploit black bodies: beginning with women like Sarah Baartman. These standards have driven women of color to extraordinary lengths to reach unrealistic #BodyGoals. As women, we have to make the decision to save ourselves from ourselves, refute these ideals, and develop beauty standards based on our natural bodies.
Self-love is imperative to healing as a culture.
Featured image via The Real/FOX
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Mercury enters Aries from April 16 until May 10, and what you were trying to see through or understand better while Mercury was retrograde here last month, you are experiencing a breakthrough now. Mercury in Aries is insightful and courageous, and people are more likely to speak their minds and initiate conversation with this energy. Mars then enters Leo from April 18 until June 17, reminding us that sometimes it’s okay to be a little more selfish and to focus on what you need right now. Mars in Leo brings forth confidence, creativity, and passion, and brings an exciting energy to charge of your life and advocate for yourself.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, bringing some earth sign energy into the mix, grounding and nurturing what you are creating in your life right now. On April 27, we have a New Moon in Taurus, and this is an abundant and fruitful New Moon. This is one of the best New Moons of the year for you to set your intentions for your financial world and a time for seeing new opportunities for abundance. On the last day of the month, Venus moves into Aries until June 6th, and love requires a little more passion, independence, and excitement during this time.
Overall, April is a month of feeling things through, taking more intuitive risks, investing in yourself, and balancing your needs with the needs of your relationships.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what April has in store for you.
AriesKyra Jay for xoNecoleARIES
April is your month to shine, Aries. With the chaos of March now over, you are starting to see the progress of where life is and how everything has turned out even better than you were expecting. The month begins with the Sun in your 1st house of self, and you are feeling more confident, courageous, and in tune with yourself. With a Full Moon in your sister sign on April 12, relationships are also coming full circle for you now, and you are claiming your peace this month.
Mercury finally goes direct on April 7 and then enters your sign from April 16 to May 10, and this is going to clear up any miscommunications that you have been through. With Mercury now in your sign, your conversations are lively, your mind is inspiring, and you are thinking one step ahead. Before the month ends, Venus enters your sign from April 30 to June 6, and love is also moving forward for you now. Overall, this is a month where you are experiencing some happy outcomes and loyal support.
TaurusKyra Jay for xoNecoleTAURUS
April is a month of passion and purpose, Taurus. You are living in your abundance, and are focused on valuing yourself and the things you are bringing to fruition right now. Venus, your ruling planet, goes direct on March 12 after being retrograde in your financial house since March 1, and you are moving into the month experiencing more opportunities and also feeling more respected in what you are accumulating for yourself and standing your ground on.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, and it’s all about you right now. This Taurus Season is smoothing things out for you in love, with new relationship developments unfolding and life flourishing for you. The New Moon this month is in your sign on April 27, it’s time for a new beginning. You are truly embracing your strength in April, making things happen for yourself, and no longer doubting your future and what is possible for you.
GeminiKyra Jay for xoNecoleGEMINI
This month is all about the options becoming available to you now, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month on April 7, you no longer feel as held back or out of place as you may have in the past weeks. With Mercury now direct, your thinking is clearer, and you are seeing the opportunities in your career and professional world that you may have missed before.
The more you can embrace your authenticity, the less time you will spend doubting how others perceive you, remember that this month.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, highlighting the romance in your life and bringing forth understanding and compassion within your close relationships. You are letting go of old attachments or self-doubts that haven’t been serving your love life, and are growing closer to your own heart in the process. Before April comes to an end, Mars enters your 3rd house of communication, and you are overall leaving the month focused on your progress, your vision, and taking up space because you deserve to.
CancerKyra Jay for xoNecoleCANCER
This month is all about balancing your time and energy wisely, Cancer. You are being reminded not to overwork or overwhelm yourself in April, and to focus on doing the things that are within your control right now. The Sun is in your 10th house of career for most of the month so you are feeling really passionate about the things you are developing in your life right now, but it’s all about finding the right balance between your personal goals and your needs in your relationships as well.
The Full Moon in Libra on April 12 will be a time to devote your energy to self-care, close loved ones, and overall getting some time to decompress. You are ready to let go of the things that don’t make you feel safe or nurtured and are receiving an emotional renewal right now. The New Moon in Taurus at the end of the month is a time to focus on your intentions on your community, friendships, and aspirations in life, and to pay attention to where you can create more abundance here.
LeoKyra Jay for xoNecoleLEO
Things are turning around for you for the better, Leo. April is a dynamic month, and you are owning your inner alchemist. With a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication on April 12, you are getting the messages you have been looking for and the mental clarity you have found is bringing closure to some of your close relationships. This month is about being flexible and trusting the changes that are happening for you right now.
On April 18, Mars enters your sign until June 17, and this is huge for you. You began the year with Mars retrograde in your sign, so you are getting the opportunity now, to rewrite some of the things that weren’t working for you at the beginning of the year. You are overcoming previous obstacles, and experiencing a breakthrough in your life this month. Before April ends, there is a New Moon in Taurus, highlighting your career, reputation, and professional life. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for what goals you want to come to fruition for you now.
VirgoKyra Jay for xoNecoleVIRGO
This month is all about building new foundations in your life, Virgo. You are feeling more supported and in tune with your own inner needs and interests, and it’s bringing you closer to people and systems that resonate. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct this month on April 7 after being retrograde for the past few weeks; bringing more clarity, understanding, and compassion to your partnerships in life. You are focused on love this month and are working together with others to make your dreams come true.
Mid-month, Mars moves into your 12th house of closure and endings, and there is a journey of healing that you experience until June 17. You are motivated to understand yourself better and are looking at the past more right now in order to do so. This is a month of recovering and healing from what has been, for new foundations to be built upon. The New Moon on April 27 is a beautiful way to end the month, as you are getting glimpses of a new, abundant, adventure that is ahead of you.
LibraKyra Jay for xoNecoleLIBRA
This is a big month of closure for you, Libra. The Sun is in your 7th house of love for most of April, and your heart is in the right place. With Venus, your ruling planet, going direct on April 12 after being retrograde since March 1, you are finally able to take a breath. You are not experiencing as many obstacles when it comes to communication matters and you are feeling like you have the tools you need to move forward right now.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on April 12, and you are ready to let go of what isn’t working for you. You have been through a lot recently and have gained the clarity you need to let go of old attachments. Venus moves into your house of love before the month ends, and you are leaving the month feeling more in tune with where things are moving forward for you, rather than what you are leaving behind. Your heart moves through a journey in April, and your emotions are showing you a lot.
ScorpioKyra Jay for xoNecoleSCORPIO
April is a month of success, progress, and dreams coming to fruition, Scorpio. You are focused on your health, your priorities, and creating space for the new beginnings that you are creating in your life right now. The Full Moon mid-month is a big closure moment for you, and you are owning the fact that you have healed and you are no longer the same person you were in the past. This is a month of stepping into your power and feeling supported in doing so.
Mid-month, Mars enters your 10th house of career and public life and you are shining within your purpose. Over the next month and a half, you are going to be gaining some new opportunities that will be serving your professional life and goals. This is the month to show up and to let your skills, talents, and authenticity shine. On April 17, there is a New Moon in your opposite sign, Taurus, and you are leaving the month with some pleasant surprises in store for you in love as well.
SagittariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleSAGITTARIUS
April is a new beginning for you, Sagittarius. You are focused on putting the action and effort behind your goals, and you are being proactive within the opportunities that you are looking for right now. With a Full Moon in your 11th house of aspirations mid-month, you are letting go of the way you thought things would play out for you and are owning a more abundant version of things.
On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus, which will be highlighting your health and what your body needs more of right now. This is a New Moon to set your intentions for your everyday life and to create a new, beneficial routine that will make things easier for you at the end of the day. Before the month ends, Venus enters your 9th house of adventure, and you are leaving the month with your sights set high. Travel plans are likely, and this is a good time to create some new plans for yourself.
CapricornKyra Jay for xoNecoleCAPRICORN
April is about putting one step in front of the other with patience and dedication and trusting the decisions you are making for yourself right now, Capricorn. The Sun is in your 4th house for most of the month, and you are yearning for your safe spaces, comfort foods, and loyal people. Giving yourself more time to decompress, take care of yourself, and ground your energy is essential this month.
Mars enters your 8th house of transformation mid-month and will be fueling your need for some change, excitement, and emotional rejuvenation over the next month and a half. You are entering an impactful moment of the year for you, and you are motivated toward change right now. The New Moon at the end of the month is in a fellow earth sign, highlighting the romantic new beginnings you are entering now. Overall, this month is a process, and you are opening new doors while finding gratitude in what is here for you now.
AquariusKyra Jay for xoNecoleAQUARIUS
April is about giving yourself time to process, accept, and gain a new perspective, Aquarius. You are being guided towards friendship, connection, and community, and are understanding what may be creating the discord in your life that has been distancing you from that. The Full Moon this month is happening in Libra on April 12, and you are ready to let go of feeling like you have to do it all at once or all alone. This month is a reminder to take your time with all the experiences you want to have, trusting that they will come to fruition for you.
Mars enters your house of love and partnership on April 18, and you enter a passionate and steamy time. Romance is in the air for you as you move through the month, and you are spending more of your time with those who you want to move forward with. Venus also moves into a relationship area of your chart before April ends, and you are surrounded by love and community. Overall, this month is showing you that you are not alone and you don’t have to go through the heavy stuff alone either.
PiscesKyra Jay for xoNecolePISCES
This is a month where your heart is shining, and you are feeling in tune with the progress you have made in your life and within your relationships, Pisces. You are owning your value, your worth, and the beauty of who you are, and are ready to leave the past behind. With Mercury and Venus both going direct in Pisces this month after being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you are in a better space than you have been, and there are fewer obstacles and miscommunications in your life.
You have been through a journey of understanding yourself better through your goals, perspectives, and interests, and have been committing yourself to your authenticity. On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus happening, and this New Moon is a good time for communication matters, getting your message across, and for your creative pursuits. With the clarity you feel within your mind and heart right now, you are making a lot of progress in April and feeling pleased with where life is headed.
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Featured image by Kyra Jay for xoNecole
