
Artist Jayson Aaron: The Most Courageous Thing A Man Can Do Is Open His Heart

Jayson Aaron is, in his own words, a philosopher with a fly exterior. Speaking of words, the model/creative also a man of many. So much so, that it turns our original half-hour interview into a conversation between friends that lasts just shy of 60 minutes.
But perhaps more importantly, Jayson Aaron is a man who's in the business of making his dreams—even the most audacious ones—a reality. "We only have a limited amount of time and if you're not living out your dreams, you're dying," he tells xoNecole. "That's just how I feel."
It's just over 30 minutes past the hour on a busy Friday morning and he pauses to apologize for the loud ambulance sirens that so rudely interrupt our lengthy yet lesson-filled chat. Those sirens become increasingly ironic considering the subject matter of the tale he begins to recount a few moments after. A home invasion, a gunshot to the chest, and an out-of-body experience that quite frankly sounds like a scene straight out of a sci-fi thriller. A moment, so unlike any he'd ever experienced before, that would not only reshape his outlook on death but on life as well.
And now, trying to coexist between two contrasting realities: earthly stress and ethereal tranquility, Aaron has shed his old man and picked up the mantle of this new one with one main goal in mind: to live life on his own terms and keep his inner peace. A peace that's perhaps above and beyond any he'd ever known, but one that he knows is possible to achieve. "I think that my journey, what it taught me and the trajectory that it sent me on was that I knew that if I would be here, there's a certain level of peace that I can obtain and that it just might be possible in this dimension," the L.A. native explains. "And so because of that: my decisions mean more to me now, my time is more valuable to me now. I can't just waste it."
xoNecole recently got the chance to talk all things life and love from Jayson's vantage point and here's what we saw:
I define myself as…
"...A philosopher in the realm of entertainment and fashion. What I studied in school was philosophy. My head was always in a book and I'm always listening to some form of inspirational audio, whether it be an audiobook, an interview, or a person whose words I admire. That comprises about 50 percent of my day and I think that's also the part that people don't know about me. How cerebral I am, which then influences all the art that I make."
The moment that changed everything taught me…
"...That rock bottom is the trampoline. And the reason why I say that is because oftentimes, it takes people to fall on their faces, not necessarily to get inspired because nobody wants to hit rock bottom, but what actually ends up happening is, you find out exactly what you don't want. And the best thing that anybody could do in their life is to make a new decision. From that point on, we have the opportunity to be able to decide exactly what we do want and how to use that negative energy, if you will, as fuel to get to the positive side."
Courtesy of Jayson Aaron
"The best thing that anybody could do in their life is to make a new decision. From that point on, we have the opportunity to be able to decide exactly what we do want and how to use that negative energy, if you will, as fuel to get to the positive side."
Life after "death" has led me…
"...On a journey of releasing my trauma through various ways in different modalities. I think that everything that we want is on the other side of our fears and it taught me that our emotions are what set the patterns for life, whether it be bad or good. It's the emotions that are oftentimes trapped in our body and causing us to be tense, and it's our emotions that we should release in order to live a proper, good, healthy, mentally healthy lifestyle. That moment made me more self-aware and that's the key to life."
Practicing self-awareness and my spirituality has made me...
"...Study myself a lot and what I found was that every effect has a cause. So if I were to feel a way about something, especially in an extreme way, you know, that's an effect caused by something-- probably a thought. So I've learned to trace that effect back and go back within my body, go back within my mind, to see exactly what it is. And it's usually a form of trauma that happened; I felt some type of way about it and I suppressed it instead of expressing it.
"But I've learned to stop placing my triggers on other people and address those things within myself and I think taking that stance on life has helped me grow and blossom into a new person. People trust me more because I trust myself more. I realized we're all reflections of each other, so I can't do anything to you that I'm really truly not doing to myself."
"I've learned to trace that effect back and go back within my body, go back within my mind, to see exactly what it is. And it's usually a form of trauma that happened; I felt some type of way about it and I suppressed it instead of expressing it."
Doing the self-work prior to my relationship allows me to…
"...Find my happiness again and that has nothing to do with anyone else because nobody else could give you that. I had to find that within myself, but because I'm here today [and] because I'm in a relationship, I'm able to profess that and I have that confidence. I have that glow. My eyes are brighter and my smile is bigger. So I attribute that to the relationship because I can now deal with and express myself within. It's all good things. I'm in love and I'm in love with life."
Being courageous in love means that…
"Essentially how you treat or view your woman is a large part of how you feel about the Universe. So, if I can openly love, in general, and if I can show love without fear to a woman, what that truly means is that I'm an open man in general. I have the confidence to go out into the world and know that what I want to make happen, can happen. So, in saying that, the most courageous thing a man could do is open his heart; one of the biggest complaints that I've gotten over the course of all my relationships, was how ice cold I am, how closed off my heart is.
"And again, going back into the conversation about processing trauma, how can you open your heart if you feel that the world is against you? Or you don't feel safe walking down the street? So, in that moment, yeah I'm professing my love for my girl, but at the same time, what I'm really doing is professing my love for the Universe. I'm saying that I'm open to receive all the blessings I deserve in life and because I get to share the experience with someone who I'm in a relationship with, they get to share in those blessings too."
"How you treat or view your woman is a large part of how you feel about the Universe. So, if I can openly love, in general, and if I can show love without fear to a woman, what that truly means is that I'm an open man in general. I have the confidence to go out into the world and know that what I want to make happen, can happen. In saying that, the most courageous thing a man could do is open his heart."
Finding my soulmate...
"...Is what I consider a purpose-mate. A purpose-mate is someone who has the same outlook on life as you and someone who is trying to make the same impact on the world as you are. As a person, you're strong; but as a unit, you're stronger. Behind every great man is a great woman; behind every great woman is a great man. I think that when you have a big dream, you need somebody who has a bigger capacity to hold that dream and there's only a handful of people who might be able to share in that.
"I do believe in love at first sight and before I thought I experienced it in the past. But when you're around the right person, there's a relaxation, which is something that I pay attention to because that means you're both on the same frequency. I'm tenacious about getting better and improving myself and getting out of my own fears. So I had to be with someone who I consider to be a purpose-mate."
Intimacy between partners should...
"...Provide a sense of security, emotional security, which is something that's invaluable. Everybody has different love languages so it should be expressed in different ways but I think being present, paying attention, [and] listening are all forms of intimacy that can't be replaced. Yeah, you can have sex but if you're just doing it for the action of it, then there's no substance. Everything that I do has to have substance, so being present in that space, in that touch, in that eye contact, in that conversation, in that hug, all those things mean more. Intimacy is the same as watering a plant; you have to be present, you have to love on it in whatever way is needed and do it consistently, and it can't be reactive, it has to be proactive."
"Everything that I do has to have substance, so being present in that space, in that touch, in that eye contact, in that conversation, in that hug, all those things mean more. Intimacy is the same as watering a plant; you have to be present, you have to love on it in whatever way is needed and do it consistently, and it can't be reactive, it has to be proactive."
What I know now about love is that…
"...There could be no way that I could properly love anyone else if I don't know what it means to love myself. So now, as I've grown, my experiences and viewpoints have grown. My outlook on women has changed. Before I was only looking at the outer shell of a woman, I was only looking at what I could get from her; that was the mentality I had and the mindset I operated from. But as I elevated my mind and how I treated myself, my version of love has changed, my version of love is an action that is designed to help increase the happiness of the other person.
"If I can be around you long enough, I'm going to get you to love yourself a little more and blossom more than you've ever blossomed before. My version of love is to help you see a greater perspective of what love is."
Courtesy of Jayson Aaron
"As I've grown, my experiences and viewpoints have grown. My outlook on women has changed. Before I was only looking at the outer shell of a woman, I was only looking at what I could get from her; that was the mentality I had and the mindset I operated from. But as I elevated my mind and how I treated myself, my version of love has changed, my version of love is an action that is designed to help increase the happiness of the other person."
What I know now about myself is...
"...That underneath all the things that I let go, I realized how loving I could be, how confident I could be; how far I could take my life. I realized all the things that I could touch. You know, I was surprised that I lived after getting shot. So now, I'm jumping higher than I've ever jumped before. I'm taking off limits, I'm doing things that I never thought were possible because my faith is strengthened. I have a deeper sense of faith in the Universe, in God, in myself and now life has gotten more fun. It took a while to get here, a lot of self-work and re-wiring of my brain but, now that I see life differently, I'm able to be happier in living it.
Want more of Jayson? Make sure to follow him on Instagram to keep up with him.
Featured image courtesy of Jayson Aaron.
- Ceylon Creators Series, Vol. 1 feat. Jayson Aaron - YouTube ›
- jayson aaron | Tumblr ›
- Jason Aaron - Wikipedia ›
- Jayson Aaron | IMVDb ›
- Jayson Aaron Profiles | Facebook ›
- Jayson Aaron - IMDb ›
- j a y s o n (@_JaysonAaron) | Twitter ›
- Breaking Borders & Barriers: Meet Jayson Aaron - Travel Noire ›
- Artist Jayson Aaron Nearly Died And Found A Path ›
- Jayson Aaron (@jayson.aaron) • Instagram photos and videos ›
Writer. Empath. Escapist. Young, gifted, and Black. Shanelle Genai is a proud Southern girl in a serious relationship with celebrity interviews, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, and long walks down Sephora aisles. Keep up with her on IG @shanellegenai.
Eva Marcille On Starring In 'Jason’s Lyric Live' & Being An Audacious Black Woman
Eva Marcille has taken her talents to the stage. The model-turned-actress is starring in her first play, Jason’s Lyric Live alongside Allen Payne, K. Michelle, Treach, and others.
The play, produced by Je’Caryous Johnson, is an adaptation of the film, which starred Allen Payne as Jason and Jada Pinkett Smith as Lyric. Allen reprised his role as Jason for the play and Eva plays Lyric.
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Tracee Ellis Ross Is Still Living A 'Robust' Life Despite Sometimes Grieving Not Being Partnered
Tracee Ellis Ross sat down with former first lady Michelle Obama and her brother Craig Robinson for their IMO podcast to have a candid discussion about dating, marriage, and family. At 52, the beloved actress is single, but is still open to finding her person. However, she realizes that she has to navigate dating differently, describing herself as a "unicorn."
“I’m a very unique sort of unicorn of a woman, so it's gonna take a unique person,” she explained. "And in the meantime, I've really learned how to live my life and enjoy it and not sit around waiting."
Calling herself a "choiceful woman," she has had to push against culture norms and found that many of her experiences with men around her age were challenging due to the toxic masculinity they had been raised in. Many of their views about relationships conflicts with how she lives her life, so she tends to date younger.
“It's not just that I'm older. I’m also very embodied. I am a full, very whole person who knows myself, who is in charge of my life and who lives a very full, just robust life," she said.
Regardless if they're younger or older, Tracee has made it clear that she isn't settling and won't be in a relationship for the sake of having a partner. Even when loneliness creeps.
“As much as grief does surface for me around not having children and not having a partner, I still wouldn’t want the wrong partner. At all, I’m not interested in that. You have to make my life better, it can’t just be ‘I’m in a relationship just to be in a relationship,” she said.
Fans have watched pieces of Tracee's life played out on social media and TV. Just one look at her Instagram, you see that the black-ish star lives her life to fullest and it's filled with fashion, family, and all-round fabulousness.
"Even though the grief does emerge, and that comes, and I hold that, I think of what I’ve done. I think I woke up every morning trying to do my best. I didn’t wake up one morning and be like I’m gonna mess this day up. So I must be where I’m supposed to be.”
She added, “And sometimes I think of all of the things I’ve done—the courage that I’ve had to have, what I had to learn to how to navigate as a single person with no one to hide behind. It's built a really beautiful experience around me and I have incredible friends."
The Black Mirror actress has spoken about dating before and has always stated that she doesn't allow singleness stop her from living her best life.
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