I like the word strange. Hell, I even like the throwback Cameo joint, “She’s Strange” (my dad used to play the entire hell out of that bassline back in the day). Strange doesn’t just mean “odd,” it also means things like unusual, extraordinary, and curious. Strange is also defined as being “outside of one’s previous experience” and “unacquainted.” In the right context with the proper understanding, there is nothing wrong with being strange — and wanting to know about things that are oftentimes considered to be strange as well.
And that’s why I gave this article the title that it has. After you check out these 12 fascinating facts about sex, I’m pretty sure that you will find at least five of them to be pretty damn strange…and honestly, when it’s all said and done, how cool is that?
1. “Having a Headache” Is the Worst Excuse Ever to Not Have Sex
GiphyImagine if you were in a long-term committed relationship, where monogamy (marriage) or exclusivity (dating) was expected, and every time you wanted to have sex, your partner claimed that they had a — le sigh — headache. Yeah, don’t even get me started on if your partner pulled the same stunt about going to work to get the bills paid, how you would really get just how annoying the “I have a headache” thing can be… I digress. Anyway, I don’t know who came up with that piss-poor excuse; however, if that’s your go-to, science says to find something else.
As wild as it may sound, it appears that the same brain chemical that triggers sexual desire is the one that can cause a migraine. If youadd to that the fact that endorphins from sex can actually reduce the tension of a headache — it really does look like the jig is totally up as far as that popular excuse is concerned. #Elmoshrug
2. If You Suck at Work, Umm…Suck at Home (Kinda)
GiphyIf you want a promotion at work, you might want to engage in some morning sex before you leave the house. Research indicates that having a healthy and fulfilling sex life can ultimately result in more productivity, engagement, and overall job satisfaction at the office. A part of the reason why is sex reduces stress. Another is that it causes endorphins (“feel good” chemicals) to kick in. Another is that sex helps to boost your creativity levels. So, if it’s been a while since you’ve indulged and your professional performance has dropped…there may be some dots to connect there.
3. Masturbation May Not Be Helping Your Sex Life As Much As You Think, Chile
GiphyI went to a Christian high school, and although I could write an entire book about so much of the BS that went on up in there (especially on the racist tip), there were some silver linings, too. One was the Bible teacher that I had during my last two years: Chuck Stanford. He was raw and researched and that combo made him a blessing. Anyway, I remember him saying that when you get caught up in the cycle of doing “everything but” (you know, intercourse), it could cause issues in your sex life up the road because you have put yourself in the habit of stopping at a certain point.
Guess what? Masturbation can potentially share in this — in a bit of a different way.
Although it has been proven that masturbation can improve the quality of orgasms, “sex with yourself” could also cause you to become sexually selfish and disconnected from your partner if you’re so used to “gettin’ yours” on your own that you no longer want to share the experience with them. Not only that, but it could also reduce the sensation of pleasure (if you’re a chronic masturbator), or it could lead to idiosyncratic masturbation style, which is what transpires when you have gotten so caught up in what you can accomplish alone that you struggle with replicating it — whatever “it” — may be with an actual partner.
Yes, “too much of a good thing” is, indeed, a thing.
4. As Much As Sex Is Crammed Down American’s Throats, Guess What?
GiphySex may sell; that doesn’t mean that it’s automatically a fulfilling experience, though — at least in the United States. I prefaced this fact this way by design because, as much as we see (and hear) sex in this country, it’s interesting that India currently holds the title for being the most sexually-satisfied country (guess the Kama Sutra really ain’t nothin’ to play with) with The Philippines, Mexico, Columbia, and South Africa not being too far behind. As far as who has the most exciting sex, Mexico and Nigeria get top ranking — meanwhile, who don’t you see up in this? Yeah…EXACTLY.
5. Bet You Don’t Know What “Gymnophoria” Means
GiphyChile, now, if you knew that the word “gymnasium” ultimately comes from a Greek word that means nakedness, hop in the comments and tell me how you found that out. Anyway, if you factor that in, I guess it makes sense that someone who deals with gymnophobia may fear nudity, or if they struggle with gymnophoria, they might be consumed with believing that people are mentally undressing them whenever they are in their presence.
6. A Man’s Hands Actually Prove Something
GiphyBack in my — eh hem — heyday, I had enough sex to know that the myth that never seems to die about being able to tell a man’s penis size based on his shoe size is just that: A MYTH. At the same time, what I will tell you that you should hone in on is a guy’s fingers. Word on the (science) street is if a man’s ring finger is longer than his index one, not only will his penis be longer, his testosterone levels will be stronger too. Do with that what you will.
7. According to Science, Seniors Have Top-Tier Sex
GiphyLess distractions. More privacy. Not having to worry about an unwanted pregnancy. Practice making perfect with the same partner. A keen awareness of one’s body. These are just some of the reasons why many seniors end up having better sex than when they were younger (and more than those who are younger than they are). Hmph.
And when you stop to consider the fact that many of our elders are running circles around folks half their age when it comes to sexual consistency and satisfaction — you might wanna watch less TikTok and go talk to your grandma if you’ve got some questions about how to enjoy coitus more. Dead serious.
8. Republicans Cheat the Most
GiphyAlthough I have plenty of thoughts about this upcoming election (and again, I digress), I’ll just put this out here, and y’all can also do with it what you will. When it comes to the party who is inclined to commit the most infidelity, it’s not “the donkeys” (some of y’all will catch that later). Moving on.
9. Some People’s Orgasms Can Last Longer than Commercial Breaks
GiphyListen, I’m all fora good orgasm; I don’t know if I’m down for one that lasts longer than six hours, though. Yep, apparently, the longest recorded orgasm for a woman is 6 hours and 30 minutes, and 8 hours and 30 minutes for a man. So, how long do climaxes last for the rest of us? Somewhere between 10-60 seconds — although if you’resomeone who can go two minutes, that is considered “normal” too.
And if you are, personally, I’m pretty impressed because that is the length offour average commercials (which is a pretty long time if you really stop to think about it).
10. Men’s Sperm Is Actually Pretty Damn Brilliant
GiphyI’m a fan of sperm. A huge part of the reason is that it played a pivotal role in what got me here (some folks need to remember that). Another is I continue to learn so many fascinating things about it (check out “Do You Swallow? The Unexpected Health Benefits Of Sperm”). Like did you know that a single sperm holds somewhere around 37.5MB worth of data?
Something else that’s a trip is a man can produce enough sperm in two weeks to impregnate every fertile woman on the planet. The more you know, chile. The more you freakin’ know.
11. An STI/STD Can Be in You for Years…and You Not Even Know It
GiphyThis one right here is something that I can personally cosign on. Many years ago, after coming down with a bout of both mono and strep throat, I also found out that I had chlamydia. At the time, I wasn’t sexually active, so I couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on. What my doctor told me was that it had been lying dormant in my system for what seemed to be a couple of years, and my other illnesses “activated” it.
If you add that to the fact that literally thousands of people have an STI/STD right now with no symptoms — moral to the story? Get tested every six months, y’all, and wear condoms. NO EXCUSES.
12. Yes, Sex Can Literally “Blow Your Mind”
GiphyOn this platform, I use the term “mind-blowing” when it comes to sex fairly often. And while it might seem like an exaggeration, there is scientific proof that says otherwise. Long story short, some activities (including sex and especially once you reach your 50s and 60s) can put the kind of pressure on certain parts of your body that can throw you into what is known as transient global amnesia (TGA) which is a form of memory loss that can last for up to 24 hours.
Although it can be frightening, it’s typically nothing to worry about, although if you can pull that off on your partner — talk about some serious bragging rights!
___
Now tell me that those sex-themed facts weren’t, oh so very literally, STRANGE.
Uh-huh. What are you gonna do with all of this intel is my question? (Hmm…)
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Now, I’ll be honest: as an avid TV-lover, I was well-prepared to hop on Zoom and jump into all the chatter around Bel-Air and her characters’ decisions. But after listening to her new EP Identity Crisis, I knew there was a lot more to talk about as well. During this exclusive conversation with xoNecole, Jazlyn Martin delved into the challenging journey she’s faced surrounding her identity, newfound fame, and family influence, and how it all plays a part in her art. Check it out!
xoNecole: So I know that your father is in the entertainment world, but when did you realize you shared the same passion?
Jazlyn Martin: I think it was very early on. I was a child who was full of attitude and fearlessness that would go after anything I wanted. I believe seeing my dad pursue music made me realize it was possible. I just had this hunger and fire, and my parents consciously fed and nurtured that - they are always all super supportive of whatever I do. So very, very early on, I was like, I'm meant to do this. And I just was like, I'm a star, and I know I'm a star.
xoN: Actually, let's talk about your family. What are some of your most important values, and how have your family and heritage played a part in shaping those values?
Jazlyn: I mean, my mom is like an angel; she's so graceful and kind, and I've had to work hard to get there. When I was young, I was very abrasive, headstrong, and stubborn. Whereas my mom gives an immense amount of grace in the way she carries herself. I had to learn that.
I think being strong is something I’ve always had. My parents always joke that they don't know where my personality came from. Because my dad is shy and timid and my mom is kind, and I'm a fireball. But my Dad always asked the important industry questions like, “Why do you want to do this?” And that instilled some purpose into me. It really carried me to keep going because it's so easy to be discouraged in this field, but that drive has helped me push through all of the challenges.
xoN: I bet. I have such a respect for actors and the way you all navigate the industry. Speaking of, let’s dig into “Bel-Air.” Were you a fan of the show? Did you have to go back and watch the episodes?
Jazlyn: So I actually did watch the show which is crazy because sometimes I don’t. I saw it was a reboot and was like, ‘Oh no, not another one.’ But I watched the first three episodes, realized how good it was, and ended up watching the whole season. I became a fan, and then a few months later, I booked the role!
I think the imagination is such a beautiful and powerful tool, and I feel like if you create something in your mind, it happens. It's a crazy thing, but I really just created Jackie's world - the house she grew up in, her parents leaving her, and everything. I created why she fell in love with dance. I really came at it from a human approach. If I see it, then the audience can see it.
xoN: Yeah, background plays into so much of how we deal with things, how we interact with people, and everything. And I feel like Jackie gets a lot of backlash. Like, we’ve all had a “Jackie Moment” to be real.
Jazlyn: She gets so much backlash! I just encourage people to give her grace and see the God in her because I do think she tells a lot of Black and brown girls' stories. People project on her, saying she’s too ratchet or hood, and I’m like does that mean she’s not loveable?
We have to be careful of what’s said and put out because Jackie has gone through things that I've never had to go through. The fact that she's alive and still highly functioning is a blessing. So what if she gets a little messy? I love her. Because she’s helped me extend empathy to people I don't necessarily want to or don't think deserve to have it. But she's 17, she's figuring it out, and she doesn't have parents. Like, that's such a huge factor.
"We have to be careful of what’s said and put out because Jackie has gone through things that I've never had to go through. The fact that she's alive and still highly functioning is a blessing. So what if she gets a little messy? I love her."
xoN: You mentioned how your character is viewed, which digs a bit into identity. So I want to talk a little bit about some of the emotional songs on your EP “Identity Crisis.” What inspired the track “Perfect?”
Jazlyn: When I was creating “Perfect,” I already had the EP title. So I kind of mapped out, like, the different conflicts I had in my head and categorized them into seven songs, and so one of my identity crises was being perfect. Because I feel like a lot of men tend to put women on pedestals. They're expected to be perfect - especially when you’re in the limelight. You know, you can't slip up. You can't say the wrong thing. Cancel culture is such a huge thing. And I just wanted to encourage people to give people grace to be themselves because that's not an easy thing to do.
I just wanted to take down this facade that I’m perfect because I never pretended to be. I never wanted to be. I think that's something people have placed on me, that I have it all figured out, I think I just carry it well, but that doesn't mean it's not heavy. I just wanted to be very vulnerable and honest. I think people think “perfect” is a compliment, but I think it's a cage because it doesn't allow room for error. It doesn't allow for you to be human and mess up and fail and take risks. So I just wanted to encourage grace.
xoN: Do you ever feel like you went through an identity crisis?
Jazlyn: I go through one constantly. Growing up, I didn't really have one. But I think as you get older and more aware and cognitive, you know how the world goes, and the world starts telling you who you are, instead of you deciding who you are. And I feel like being mixed played a big role in that, not feeling Black or Mexican enough. I wanted to belong to both worlds but didn’t so I was just “other.” That was an identity crisis in itself.
Also, being introduced to a level of fame has been interesting, too. I think we all go through identity crises all the time because we’re evolving and changing. It’s beautiful, but it’s also scary; you see yourself this one way, and then something happens, and there’s a shift. So yeah, I think it’s something we all go through but no one talks about.
"I think as you get older and more aware and cognitive, you know how the world goes, and the world starts telling you who you are, instead of you deciding who you are. And I feel like being mixed played a big role in that, not feeling Black or Mexican enough. I wanted to belong to both worlds but didn’t so I was just 'other.'"
xoN: I love that. And I know Hispanic Heritage Month is coming up, and you'll be speaking at the New York Latino Film Festival. Talk to me about what that moment means to you and what you hope to bring to the event. *Editor’s note: The interview was conducted before Hispanic Heritage Month began.
Jazlyn: I’m bringing some Afro-Latino-ness! I always grew up seeing Latinos being represented in a very specific way—very Spanish, not very Indigenous looking. So I'm really excited to bring the Black experience, with the Latino experience, to the stage because that's something a lot of people don't know exists.
People are always like, “Are you Black or Latina?” Well, I'm both! We were just dropped off in different parts. I’m excited to speak on that and highlight how prevalent anti-Blackness is within Latino communities. A lot of Afro-Latinos have faced an identity crisis because of it, including myself. It sometimes feels like you’re supposed to hate the other half of who you are.
For me, I held onto that little Black girl inside. I refused to let her go. And that’s what I want to represent when I speak—resilience and acceptance of our full selves. I’m also looking forward to meeting fellow Latino people, especially Afro-Latinos, and sharing our stories. It’s not a narrative that gets much attention, and I’m excited to represent.
xoN: I’m excited for you! Finally, with all the praise and recognition you’re receiving now, what has it been like to transition from working in music, dance, and acting to now being in the spotlight? How have you embraced this new level of fame?
Jazlyn: Um, it's overwhelming. I think that's the best word. Sometimes, I'm joyful, because I'm giving back to the community. People resonate with Jackie's stories and see themselves in her, which I think is the biggest compliment to me. But then sometimes, you know, I feel sad because I'm like, ‘Damn, I'm not doing enough,’ like I should be doing more. It's crazy, the industry is so fast-paced that you don't really try to celebrate wins. It's just a transition, an identity crisis of the like.
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Her influence extends far beyond the realm of clothing, encompassing everything from her rigorous Pilates routine to her meticulously curated skincare regimen.
Let’s keep it 1000— her words carry weight, and her recommendations are highly sought after. The fashion industry hangs on her every word, eager to know what trends she will embrace next. Her Instagram account, with its millions of followers, serves as a virtual runway, showcasing the latest must-have items and coveted accessories.
Recently, she sat down with StyleCaster to share what’s in her Hermès bag and there were a couple of items that grabbed our attention so let’s run them back.
YSL Sunglasses
Every girl needs a pair of sunnies at the ready. You never know who you need to avoid or when you wanna have a legit no-makeup day. Lori believes, “They just are the vibe.”
Chanel Hand Cream
“One thing you’ll never find me is ashy,” the star boasts. Of course, her hand cream of choice is Chanel which deeply hydrates, protects, and delicately scents your hands. Quickly absorbed, it leaves skin soft, supple, and long-lasting comfort. Best of all, your nails and cuticles are enhanced for a flawless manicure.
Rhode Peptide Lip Treatment
Apparently the Rhode hype is real. Lori shared that she likes to indulge in this nourishing delight that transforms her lips on the go so much so that she has one in every bag. According to the girlies, this ethereal formula glides on effortlessly, leaving your lips with a glossy sheen. It works diligently to deeply nourish and quench the thirst of dry lips, ensuring they remain hydrated and supple.
Baby Hair Brush
“The baby hair queen” herself has over 100 baby hair brushes because you gotta keep those edges slayed and laid. This Red by Kiss Ultimate Edge Fixer Professional Boar Hair Brush is a 3-in-1 baddie that features natural and gentle boar bristles that provide a massaging sensation on the scalp, improving blood flow and making it perfect for sculpting short, unruly baby hairs and taming flyaways. It also offers two types of ends for versatile use, including edge control gel application.
SKN by LH White Tea Toner
This toner serves as a good refresher for the model on the go. “It’s very fresh and keeps the skin hydrated. Any time I need a pick me up for my skin, I am whipping her out.”
During the sit-down, the multi-hyphenate also emphasized her strong work ethic and involvement in all aspects of her skincare brand, SKN by LH, from creative product development to Instagram curation. Lori debunks misconceptions about her not working, proudly stating that she earns everything she has and is deeply invested in her brand's success.
Honorable Mentions: Birth Control & Fan
We just had to add Lori's birth control must-have moment from the vid to the list, “Because you know… no babies,” as Lori said.
Additionally, whether folks know it or not, having a fan handy is key to maintaining a sweat-free beat and not appearing too glowy. No matter the season, keep a handheld fan, motorized or old-school, in your bag to quite literally keep cool. It’s the Lori Harvey-approved way to keep it cute.
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Featured image by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images