You may think gel is gel and it's a one size fits all type of thing, but you might want to rethink that. When it comes to styling products, gel specifically, there are a few important factors to consider: the formula, ingredients, and hold. The needs of the gel may vary depending on your hair type or the style you're trying to achieve. Moisture is another important factor. We want great shape, hold, and curls, but we don't want to put our hair through any unnecessary breakage or dryness.
The key to healthy, bouncy, and hydrating curls is all about the gel, its ingredients, and using it for the right purpose. Here is a complete breakdown of what types of gels to use (and my top recommendations) for the best results on your natural hair. Let's break this guide down to types of holds, ingredients, and ideal styles.
Soft Hold
Krissy Lewis/xoNecole
I never really used soft hold gels to create a protective style because I wanted my style to last as long as possible. I figured, the firmer the hold, the longer it would last but that's not always true. Yes, you need a gel with hold, but you also want a gel that will moisturize, protect, strengthen, and soothe your scalp. Curls B Smooth Curl Butter Gel has to be one of the best protective styling gels in the market right now.
First of all, the slip is almost like butter (pun intended). It makes creating your style so much easier and acts as a butter-and-gel-in-one. It immediately softened and moisturized my hair, making braiding a breeze. I did use another butter for extra moisture and I strongly recommend that if your hair is on the dryer side. It's also very gentle but effective so you don't have to worry about your style unraveling or becoming undone.
Krissy Lewis/xoNecole
Ingredients…
The main ingredient in this formula is bean tree. Bean tree is a natural, clear liquid that comes from castor and grapeseed. Bean tree conditions the scalp and hair, retains moisture, and absorbs quickly without leaving a greasy feel. This ingredient alone makes this a great choice for protectives styles because you want to retain as much moisture as possible.
Medium Hold
Krissy Lewis/xoNecole
Medium hold gels are ideal for braid/twist-outs because it allows your hair to still have movement and body yet gives you the right amount of hold to keep your hair in place. Curls B Defined Curl Defining Gel is a great option for perfecting your braid/twist outs.
When I tried it, I applied my moisture products on my freshly washed hair then coated my strands with the gel and began to braid my hair. It brought out my curl pattern and added moisture without any flakes. To maintain my braid-out, every night I braided my hair into 2-6 jumbo braids and threw on my bonnet. By day three, I re-moisturized my hair with the curl defining gel and still didn't experience any dryness or flakes. With some gels, the more you use, the more likely you'll experience some type of build-up, but with this particular gel, you avoid all of that.
Krissy Lewis/xoNecole
Ingredients…
Its main ingredient is quinoa which adds strength and protection to your hair while enhancing your curls and adding shine to your style. For braid/twist-outs, you'd want a gel that will give you some hold and a lot of movement. It also moisturizes, nourishes, adds shine to your curls, and helps prevent breakage.
Firm Hold
Krissy Lewis/xoNecole
Firm hold gels are ideal for wash n' go to keep the style in place, minimize frizz, and let your style last even longer. I'm just going to tell you now, I'm not the biggest fan of wash n' go's. For type 4 hair, it's very drying and the shrinkage will have you looking like you got a haircut.
To be honest, the Curls B N Control Curl Sculpting Gel does exactly what it says– let you be in control. When I used this to style my wash n' go, I noticed immediately that it enhanced my curls but also kept them firm and in place. The hold is more intense than the one for braid-outs, however, it's still moisturizing and allows movement with your hair. My hair was still very soft and my wash n' go lasted for more than just a week. I didn't reapply any gel, just oils and a bit of water.
Krissy Lewis/xoNecole
Ingredients…
The main ingredient in this gel is Aloe Leaf Juice. If you don't know Aloe is the GOAT when it comes to beauty for your hair and skin. Aloe Leaf Juice helps repair dead skin cells on the scalp, conditions your hair, leaving it smooth and shiny promoting hair growth and preventing itching on the scalp.
So Overall…
Krissy Lewis/xoNecole
It's very important to use gels that are helpful to your hair instead of harmful. A lot of us type 4 naturals rely on gels for our style so you may want to use one that will benefit you. It's also important to know what gel works best for the style you are trying to achieve as well as the hold and ingredients.
So to recap...
For twist/braid-outs, you want something that moisturizes, brings out your curls, and has a lot of body. For wash n' go's, you need something firm but VERY moisturizing (especially for type 4 hair), reduces frizz, and keeps your style in place. For protective styles, you want something that has slip, promotes moisture as well as retains it. You also want a firm enough hold that can keep your style without drying it out!
I highly recommend trying the gels by CURLS, it's effective, affordable, and has healthy/helpful ingredients for our crowns. However, if you decide not to, please stay away from harmful ingredients like drying alcohols, sulfate, parabens, and mineral oil/petroleum and use something that actually benefits your hair.
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The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and SkylarCj Hart @hartbreakToday, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak