I didn't notice it while I was spending the summer abroad in London. Or even during tailgates, kickbacks, and hazy nights in New Orleans with my favorite girlfriends, but I was always searching.
We dressed up and went out to get "chose".
Fingers crossed as we walked across uneven parking lots in uncomfortable heels. Hopes focused on bumping into a Mr. Right who would ease the pain of the last failed relationship.
Thinking back on it, we were in our best days. We were vibrant 20-somethings who were going places fast. Yet we missed the full essence of our beautiful journey wishing for what we thought was better.
Tears. There were always tears. Maybe not from all of us at once, but at least from one of us.
At any given time, one of us was wondering when he would call or why he was inconsistent. One of us had caught him in another lie or pulled up on him doing something he shouldn't.
We were constantly putting ourselves through a cycle of frustration – mad that we couldn't force grown men to act right, sad when we gained enough dignity to leave, lonely when they were gone, and relapsing for the warmth of a body next to ours.
The cycle of longing was never-ending.
I suppose we were resilient. Putting ourselves back together again after every letdown. Always encouraging each other not to give up on love. But, nonetheless, there was this feeling that we were missing out – long gazes at happy couples as we wondered what that felt like.
We spent all this time fearful that we would never know. Afraid that we might one day turn into Mary Jane from the TV show. None of us would admit it at the time, but it was obsessive – this thought that life would be complete with a man.
Yet, all around us were opportunities to be complete within ourselves.
At age 27, I finally got the memo that there was more to life than wishing it away. I realized that I was pretty damn bomb without a man to validate me.
In one of my proudest moments, I sat down and wrote a letter to my future husband. I promised to live my best life until he manifested into my world. I vowed physical fitness, travel, spiritual growth, prosperity, and wholeness within myself. I released the stress of forcing relationships and got serious about falling in love with me.
As soon as I wholeheartedly placed my focus on being the best I could be for me, my husband came along.
It was the most ironic thing I've witnessed in my life. I couldn't ask for a better partner. He is strong, loving, and emotionally available. With him, I can be my true and authentic self. He motivates me to match his ambition and encourages me to be the best version of myself. It's everything I was hoping for way back then.
But if I'm honest, when I reflect over my single days, it's a little embarrassing. I spent most of them wishing to be married. Eventually, God granted me my heart's desire. And although I am thankful for my husband, I realize that wishing my life away was a great misuse of my time.
Instead, I should've capitalized on the opportunity to throw myself into my dreams with all my might while I had no responsibility or obligation to consider the needs and wants of someone else. I'm still growing and thriving, but I often think about how much more I could've accomplished with a different mindset.
Hindsight is 20/20, but if I could get a do-over of my single days, I'd enjoy sleepovers with my friends that didn't include hour-long convos about some guy, go to Italy without worrying that it is too romantic for a single person, and take risks on passionate ideas that sound crazy to the outside world. If you do it right, marriage is amazing, but that doesn't negate the hard work and sacrifice that comes along with it.
While you're single you should splurge, see the world, enjoy sporadic girls' trips, workout like crazy, read so much that your eyes hurt, date around without expectations, and do the things that scare you.
More than that, I challenge you to be free.
Cherish this season in your life. Stop losing yourself in the idea of love and find yourself through experiences that make you better.
Besides, when you do all these things, the right type of love will come.
Featured image by Getty Images
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It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Alistair Berg/Getty ImagesStep 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Getty ImagesStep 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
DMP/ Getty ImagesStep 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Below, Angel shares the skincare products that make her skin glow and her go-to makeup looks.
Check out her routines below.
Skincare
Vogue/YouTube
Angel starts with La Roche-Posay Hydrating Gentle Cleanser. “I love skincare. Makes me feel good, makes me feel cleanse, especially after a long day because I’m always on the go,” she said. “I play sports, so my face is always drenched with sweat, and I always gotta keep it clean.”
Vogue/YouTube
Angel uses two moisturizers. She uses Fenty Skin Hydra Vizor Invisible Moisturizer SPF 30 first and follows it up with Cetaphil Soothing Gel Cream with Aloe.
"You have to use the thinnest layer and then the thickest layer," she said. "I learned these tips because one time I posted a skincare routine and they were like, you need to run that back. And they taught me you need to do thin then thick and then I could see the complete difference with my skin."
Vogue/YouTube
She keeps Laniege Lip Balm with her at all times, including during games.
Vogue/YouTube
One-Size Setting Spray is her go-to for keeping her makeup fresh on the court. “I usually spray my beauty blender with my setting spray,” she said. “People usually wet the beauty blender under the water, but why not set it with this.”
Vogue/YouTube
She rounds out her beauty routine with mascara, brows, and her lip combo using Rare Beauty Kind Words Lip Liner and Covergirl Clean Fresh Yummy Gloss. But before closing, she made sure to give flowers to the WNBA stars before her who were also known for getting glammed on and off the court.
“I gotta give kudos to the girls who were wearing makeup before. Lisa Leslie, Skylar Diggins, Candace Parker. Everybody already had their edges and their lashes, lipstick on," she said. "Tina Thompson; she used to wear a full red lip on her lips during the game, but that’s something I could probably never do.”
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Feature image by Vogue/YouTube