There's a common misperception surrounding beauty standards and the black woman. Historically, black women have been the "purveyors of curves," which includes our thick thighs, small waists, big butts, big breasts, and full lips. I would say I have 4 out of 5. But just like all of us aren't naturally blessed with an abundance of tits and ass, all of us aren't blessed with a Kerry Washington pout.
While many women of color are fortunate to naturally be shaped like a "brick house" with body and lips galore, not everyone has that genetic makeup. It was one of the reasons I found myself sitting in the doctor's office last December, waiting to get lip injections. Yes, you read that right, lip injections.
I'm not sure where my dislike for my lips began – or if I would even call it a "dislike." I think I first started noticing I wasn't happy with them four years ago. It was January 2014 and my shoulder-length hair, that I had long associated with being a woman, had fallen out after trusting the wrong stylist. Without my hair, I became more aware of my face shape and the strength of my features. I looked more androgynous and felt that, along with my hair, my femininity now evaded me.
Lip injections wasn't the first place that my mind went to help me feel a little more womanly.
I started with my brows. As an entertainment journalist who does a lot of on-camera celebrity interviews at press junkets and the like, I had begun to feel like something was missing. After failing miserably a handful of times to fill in my brows myself, a makeup artist suggested I look into microblading, a process that would permanently fill in my brows. Call me naive but it was shocking to me to learn that many people were waking up with full brows as the result of microblading. After researching the procedure, I had my brows tattooed (known as "powder brow") in July 2016.
With my hair slowly growing back and my new eyebrows on fleek, I was also interested in fuller lips in hopes of looking less androgynous and more feminine. It was around that time that I started seeing fuller lips start to trend, so much so that every cosmetic brand seemed to be coming out with their own version of an "injection gloss," promising fuller lips. I have lips, but I wouldn't have minded them being a little more pronounced.
Out of curiosity, I purchased several of these glosses, but quickly discovered they were just a gimmick and a waste of money.
Still, I tried to be content with my small lips and I looked for "natural" remedies for fuller lips, which included homemade concoctions like mixing coconut oil with cayenne pepper.
I quickly grew tired of trying to mix potions in the kitchen, so I decided to up the ante and look into more long-term options for fuller lips. I had known about lip fillers for a minute, but admittedly, I second-guessed my desire to have them as a real possibility because I was convinced it was something black women didn't "do."
But, I found a handful of beauty vloggers online that were women of color that showed me differently. Dymond Goods, AliyahsFace, and DollFaceBeautyx were all transparent about their journeys and experiences with lip fillers. And their transparency helped to further affirm that I wanted my lips done too.
New year, new lips was the motto. I made my appointment for December 19 at LaserAway in Santa Monica where, one of the beauty vloggers that inspired my decision, Dymond Goods, had gotten her lips done. As I sat with the ice pack on my mouth and waited for the nurse to prep the needle, I thought briefly about the harsh comments I'd probably be met with for choosing to be candid about my experience:
"But your lips were fine…"
"You should just be happy with what God gave you…"
"Embrace your natural beauty…"
"You're black, your lips are already full!"
"You must not love yourself if you would alter yourself…"
I believe it's semantics to say it's "okay" to take a needle to permanently put ink on your body or holes through your ears, nose or belly button, yet it's abhorrent to take a needle with a natural acid that's also used medically to temporarily enhance your lips.
Note: lip fillers are not permanent.
The product used was Juvederm Ultra, which is made of hyaluronic acid, a naturally occurring component within your body.
So, lip injections only last about six months to a year as the product dissolves and your lips will return to their normal size if you choose not to get a refill. The time it takes for the product to dissolve is also dependent upon how much is used in the procedure. I only used half a syringe because I didn't want my lips to look obnoxiously obvious. But the results are so subtle that my roommate who's been my friend for over ten years hasn't noticed.
Weeks later, I confidently say that I plan to go back to LaserAway to finish the syringe. Having gone through the thirty-minute process once and the pain of the needle being a 5 out of 10, I think my lips can be even fuller.
Left - Before Lip Injections, Right - After Lip Injections
In speaking with Dymond prior to my procedure about criticism she's received online, she poignantly reiterated that "Self-improvement isn't self-hate," and I wholeheartedly agree.
There was once a time when I was self-conscious about my skin tone and my weight, but I'm so elated to have come to a really great space of self-love. Long before the lip injections, I came to a place of wholeness where I began to walk into a room with a big blonde afro, red lipstick and my best accessory, my self-confidence.
Just like my eyebrows, fuller lips simply help to further accentuate my look, it's an accessory.
Regardless of what objections others may have, I encourage you to do whatever helps you to feel like your best self. Sometimes it's as simple as getting your hair done, beating your face, or buying designer clothes. Other times feeling like your best self may be a more invasive process like braces to fix a crooked smile, and for others, it's liposuction or breast implants.
Regardless of what your "fix" may be, we have one life to live, do whatever makes you happy.
Would you consider getting lip injections? Why or why not? Sound off in the comment section below.
The Mecca Of Fashion: The Top Street Style Moments At Howard Homecoming
Outfits were planned, bags were packed, and cameras were ready to capture Howard University's collegiate spirit during its centennial Homecoming celebration. Not only does it hold the number one ranking as the most elite Historically Black College and University or its top performing academics, diversity of students and alumni, but the HBCU also leaves a legacy of style and grace.
The essence of effortless poise and refinement shines bright through the iconic university colors of indigo blue, red, and white. Every October, Howard University students, alumni, staff, and friends gather on the prestigious campus in Washington, D.C. to take part in time-honored traditions and events, which is Homecoming. This year's theme, “The Meccaverse,” was a week-long celebration of Howard University’s heritage, including the Homecoming football game and Bison Pep Rally, the Fashion Show, Greek Life Step Show, Homecoming Day of Service, Lavender Reception, and the iconic Yard Fest Concert.
As 2024 marked the 100th anniversary of the Howard Bison trek back to The Mecca and after two years of virtual events due to the COVID-19 pandemic, this was to be a celebration of a lifetime. We enlisted HU alumnus Sharmaine Harris, a luxury retail buyer, as she revisited her alma mater as eyes on the yard for fashion-forward outfits mixed with personal style and campus pride for the weeklong celebration.
Before we get to the looks, discover how attending Howard University impacted her career in fashion and her day-to-day style:
Credit: Sharmaine and Friends
xoNecole: Describe your personal style. Did attending Howard have any impact on developing it?
Sharmaine: Howard taught me that there’s no such thing as being TOO dressed. There’s always a reason to “put it on” and look presentable, even if it’s just for a day of classes. Standing out was celebrated and encouraged with my peers embracing the opportunity, giving me the confidence to try new styles and trends.
xoNecole: How did Howard shape your career as a luxury buyer?
Sharmaine: I studied Fashion Merchandising, through which I was fortunate to have professors who were very connected to the industry and able to give first-hand accounts of opportunities and what to expect post-college. I was also able to build a network through my peers and other Howard Alum, which has opened doors to endless possibilities both within fashion as well as daily life.
The same confidence instilled in me through my style has also been rooted deeply within me as I step into any role or project I’m faced with throughout my career.
xoNecole: This year marked Howard’s 100th-anniversary Homecoming celebration. Can you describe what the weekend looked and felt like?
Sharmaine: I’ve gone to many Howard Homecomings since graduating, but this year’s 100th anniversary felt like a huge family reunion filled with nothing but love. It was beautiful to see so many Bison return home looking great and radiating joy. It was beautiful!
xoNecole: What makes Howard fashion different from other HBCUs?
Sharmaine: Being that Howard is The Mecca, we have such a diverse population with each individual having their own spin on fashion. Getting dressed is second nature for us, but the layered confidence is our secret ingredient to make any look come together. Through that comfortability to push barriers, we have a legacy of setting trends, as indicated by the many alumni we have in the fashion and entertainment industry.
Keep scrolling for the top street style moments from The Mecca's Homecoming weekend:
Credit: Lacey Gallagher
Credit: Alan Henderson
Credit: JaLynn Davis
Credit: Dylan Davis
Credit: Caleb Smith
Credit: Kendall W.
Credit: Jordyn Finney
Credit: Vanessa Nneoma
Credit: Dr. Mariah Sankey-Thomas
Credit: Caleb MacBruce
Credit: Tiffany Battle
Credit: Teniola
Credit: Ilahi Creary
Credit: Nicolas Ryan Grant
Credit: Dylan Davis
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image courtesy of Sharmaine Harris
From Hot Chicken To Hidden Gems: Your Guide To Exploring Nashville Like A Local
Whether you travel for culture, food, the arts, or something more personal, it’s time you take a trip to Nashville.
Also known as Music City, Nashville is a vibrant hub of culture, creativity, and Southern hospitality right in the heart of Tennessee. My first time visiting the city was last year, and I was pleasantly surprised at how lively and full of character the city is. Renowned for its rich musical heritage, from country to blues, Nashville draws visitors with its lively nightlife, historic landmarks, and delicious culinary scene.
While the city is often labeled a bachelorette destination because it really is a lit place to host one, it offers so much more than just that.
Even just a weekend in the city is enough to experience a lot of what Nashville offers. Most people associate Nashville with traditional country music, but Nashville holds a deep connection to Black artists who also helped shape its music scene, contributing to genres like gospel, soul, and country. There are opportunities throughout the city to take a walk down memory lane and learn the history of how music expanded and changed the city. Nashville is also underrated for being a foodie city, even though it boasts some delicious local favorites like smoking BBQ and hot chicken.
Nashville is the type of city that can be great for a more chill solo trip or a turned-up girls' trip. This guide will showcase all the places to visit and things to do in Nashville that are Black girl-friendly. From museums to rooftops to must-eat restaurants, you’ll be able to plan the perfect trip to Music City.
Where to Stay in Nashville:
Hyatt Centric Downtown Nashville
Courtesy of the Hyatt Centric Downtown Nashville
The Hyatt Centric Downtown Nashville, newly opened in 2021, is a contemporary hotel that places you right in the heart of the action. I loved staying here because it was within walking distance of Broadway and a lot of other popular attractions, so I had less of a need for a car or taxis. The rooms were chic and modern, and the floor-to-ceiling windows offered views of the city skyline. Some of the larger suites are perfect for families or groups, and I loved that they include record players complete with a selection of music to fit your taste.
The hotel boasts a rooftop pool and bar, as well as an on-site restaurant called Ella’s, which emphasizes locally sourced ingredients. After a long day of exploring, it was nice to have a food option right in the hotel so that I could go from dinner to my pajamas in a matter of minutes. Plus, its prime location makes it easy to access major music venues, vibrant nightlife, and diverse dining options, ensuring a well-rounded Nashville experience. When you stay here, you have to try the housemade mozzarella sticks or salmon piccata at Ella’s. Absolutely delicious!
Hutton Hotel
The Hutton Hotel is another great option for anyone looking for a cozy stay that has a lot to offer. Located in the West End, the hotel was recently upgraded, and the interior gives off a blend of comfort and sophistication. The hotel has its own music venue, Analog, which hosted an R&B show while I was there and gave off sexy speakeasy vibes.
Throughout the year, they have a calendar full of other live performances and events available for both guests of the hotels and non-guests. This is a great option for anyone who doesn’t want to be directly in the mix of Broadway and Downtown, but still within a reasonable distance to the fun.
Where to Eat & Drink in Nashville
1. Hattie B’s Hot Chicken
No trip to Nashville is complete without a trip to Hattie B’s to indulge in a local staple, Hot Chicken. This popular eatery serves up crispy fried chicken in the form of wings, tenders, and sandwiches, with varying levels of heat, from mild to "shut the cluck up!" Hot Chicken’s origin in Nashville has a funny backstory that can be traced back to the 1930s when it was created as a way to spice up fried chicken for a jilted lover.
Today, Hattie B’s not only celebrates this local tradition but also highlights the contributions of Black women like Chef B, who helped put Hot Chicken on the map. Outside of chicken, Hattie B’s also serves up sides like mac n cheese, dirty fries, and fried pickles. No matter what else is on the agenda, it’s a must-try experience that encapsulates Nashville's culinary spirit.
2. Pancake Pantry
For the best start to your day, head to Pancake Pantry for a breakfast that will leave you full and satisfied. They have locations in both Downtown and Hillsboro Village, but the quality of food is consistent across locations. Famous for its fluffy pancakes that are made from scratch every morning, there’s no wonder a line wraps around the block every day.
During my visit, I tried their classic pancakes with some candied bacon on the side, and it was worth the wait. If pancakes aren’t your thing, they have a well-balanced menu with offerings for everyone, including kids.
3. The Cupcake Collection
There’s always room for dessert, which means a stop at The Cupcake Collection, a Black-owned bakery that specializes in gourmet cupcakes and other treats. Founded by a mother who turned her passion into a business, this shop features a rotating selection of flavors made with love and quality ingredients.
From classic vanilla to unique creations like sweet potato and peach cobbler, grab a couple of different ones to satisfy your sweet tooth. The sweet potato cupcake came highly recommended and was likely the best cupcake I’ve ever had in my life. You don’t want to skip this place!
4. Suite Twelve25
No trip of mine is complete without a stop for brunch and mimosas, and Suite Twelve25 brought not only good food but the vibes as well. This is definitely the kinda spot that you go to with the girls to start off Sunday Funday correctly. They have a menu that features brunch faves like chicken and waffles, shrimp and grits, and breakfast tacos.
A DJ spins tunes throughout, and we heard everything from hip-hop to reggae to R&B throwbacks. The inside is Instagrammable so come dressed to impress for the content. And if you really want to get the party started, opt for one of their mimosa towers and get ready to turn up Nashville style!
5. White Limozeen
Nashville has the rooftop game on lock, and White Limozeen is an absolute must-visit for everyone. Located on top of The Graduate by Hilton Nashville, this Dolly Parton-themed rooftop is a whole vibe. The aesthetic and decor are largely pink, giving it a stylish and quirky feel. You can go to enjoy a meal or just pop up to the rooftop for drinks and a view. They have unique and girly cocktails to try out, and the champagne Jell-O shots are too cute to pass up.
There’s limited outdoor seating, so a reservation is a must. Before you leave, make sure that you get a picture with the large Dolly Parton head figurine.
Things to Do in Nashville
1. National Museum of African American Music
The National Museum of African American Music is a must-see for anyone interested in the rich musical legacy of African Americans. This museum showcases the profound impact of Black artists across various genres, including jazz, blues, R&B, and hip-hop. It was inspiring to see the trajectory of the relationship between Black people and music across time and genres. I learned a lot about prominent figures in music that I was unfamiliar with, as well as the history of some of the musical icons that we all know.
This is an interactive museum, so expect exhibits and engaging storytelling, but also opportunities to create your own music beats and even practice recording in a pretend studio. It’s an enlightening experience that highlights the cultural contributions of Black musicians and their influence on the music we love today.
Courtesy of Robin D. Thomas
2. Nearest Green Distillery
A visit to the Uncle Nearest Distillery is essential for whiskey enthusiasts. This is located outside of Nashville, in Shelbyville, but is 100% worth the drive. This historic distillery pays tribute to Nearest Green, the first known African-American master distiller, who taught Jack Daniel the art of whiskey-making. It was inspiring to learn about the legacy of Mr. Green, who was born into slavery, especially considering the barriers in an industry that was largely unwelcoming to Black individuals.
The distillery offers guided tours that delve into Green's life and contributions, educating guests about the historical significance of Black distillers in America and also curated tastings so that visitors can sample their award-winning spirits. If you get hungry, on-site is a BBQ spot that has the most amazing brisket grilled cheese and collard greens, plus some other BBQ favorites. Also on the property is the Humble Baron, a bar that currently holds the Guinness World Record for being the longest-continuous bar in the world. It boasts a 514-foot-long bar and also has live music at certain times.
3. Hit Up Broadway
No visit to Nashville is complete without experiencing the lively atmosphere of Broadway’s honky-tonk bars. This iconic strip is home to numerous bars featuring live music, dancing, and vibrant nightlife. This is where you’ll see all the bachelorette parties and even locals just looking to have a fun night out.
The street is typically closed to traffic, so at night, you can stroll down the strip, popping in and out of different bars and taking in the true Nashville music scene. With each bar offering a different vibe, it’s the perfect way to immerse yourself in Nashville's renowned music scene.
4. Live Music at Historic Venues
Nashville’s music scene is legendary, and experiencing live music at some of its historic venues really encapsulates the full Nashville experience. Some of the most well-known venues include Ryman Auditorium and the Grand Ole Opry, but throughout the city, you can also catch shows at smaller spaces. No matter what genre is your favorite, you’re likely to be able to find a show that fits your interests. These venues not only offer great music but also rich histories that tell the story of Nashville’s musical evolution.
Nashville’s blend of rich history, culture, and culinary delights makes it a fantastic destination for those looking to explore somewhere new. Once known as mostly a party city, Nashville has been expanding and rebranding as a place that offers so much more. There’s so much you can do during a solo adventure or a curated girls' trip.
Whether you’re sipping whiskey at Uncle Nearest or indulging in delicious hot chicken, there’s something for everyone to enjoy in Music City.
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Featured image by f11photo/Getty Images