

Although I’m going to forever be the woman who thinks that ladies should never be ashamed of their age — because aging is a beautiful thing as well as a blessing — that doesn’t mean I think that we should be out here just letting ourselves go. The reality is, that we can tell the truth about our birthdays and still earn a ton of compliments about how good we look on each and every one of them when we are aware of the many ways to slow down the physical appearance of aging.
By factoring in things like eating healthy, drinking less alcohol, exercising, not using beauty products that contain harsh chemicals, and keeping stress down to a minimum, you are playing a significant role in keeping your skin (and hair) looking younger than it actually may be.
Today, to go along with those things, I’ve provided 12 other tips that can help slow down the aging process as far as how you look goes. The cool thing about all of them is they are all-natural, easy to implement, and have been proven to be effective.
1. Eat Some Broccoli and Cauliflower
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As I was doing a bit of research for this article, my 'something new' was learning thatthe Latin word cruciferae means “cross bearing;" apparently, it’s because many “mustard-related” veggies have four petals that resemble a cross (interesting). Ironically enough, if you want to keep your skin looking youthful and healthy, cruciferous vegetables can be its (pardon the pun) saving grace. Not only doveggies like broccoli, cauliflower, and arugula help to restore some of the immunity that declines as we get older, they can help tolower the risk of a breast cancer diagnosis.
Also, because they areloaded with vitamin C, the collagen that’s in that particular nutrient can help to reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles too.
2. Consume More Fatty Acids
A simple explanation of fatty acids is they’re the kind of fats that are actually good for you, especially as far as your heart is concerned.The reason why your skin and hair like them so much is because they contain properties that help to protect them both from UV damage, they can keep your skin and hair hydrated and, when it comes to your hair, specifically, fatty acids are able to help to prevent hair loss (something that can become an issue as you get older).
Another cool thing about fatty acids is they have the ability to keep the surface layers of your skin looking smooth and even. One way to get fatty acids into your system is to take an omega supplement orfish oil supplement. Another option is to consume foods that are loaded with them. Some of those includesalmon, chia seeds,pasture-raised eggs, spinach and anchovies.
3. Create an Essential Oil Blend
Any time that I’m given the opportunity to shout out some type of essential oil, you can absolutely believe that I am going to do it. Today, since the focus is slowing down the appearance of aging,I’m going to share a few that can help you out in that department. One that I like a lot is rosemary oil. To me, it provides a radiant glow without a (super) oily residue. Beyond that, it also helps to fight off the kind of free radicals that can lead to cellular damage and make your skin look older than it actually is.
Sandalwood oil is another great option; that’s because it contains properties that can help to smooth out the appearance of fine lines. Another essential oil to consider is neroli; it’s been known to help with cell renewal (so that your skin loses more dead skin cells; frankincense can do this as well). Add one or all of these to a carrier oil (to dilute the potency in them), and you’ll have a great moisturizer to put on your skin before turning in at night.
4. Bathe in Milk
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Although I can’t tell you the last time that I drank a cup of milk (I’m more of an oat milk gal, myself), if there’s one thing that I will do, with the quickness, ishop into a tub that is filled with some dairy milk in it. Why? Well, between the vitamins A and D along with the lauric acid that’s in it,milk is awesome when it comes to gently exfoliating your skin, deeply moisturizing it, and reducing skin inflammation.
In fact, if you’ve been looking for a chemical-free type of skin cleanser, some skin experts say that washing your face in milk can be just as (if not more) effective than many popular skincare products. Oh, andwhile we’re on the topic, when it comes to your hair, milk can also reduce dryness, heal dandruff, and reduce split ends. Yep, cosmetically, milk totally has your back in a myriad of different ways.
5. DIY a Blend of Shea Butter and Aloe Vera
If you’ve ever looked at (eh hem) certain other folks and wondered why some of them look twice their age, a big part of it is because, if they’ve spent years in the sun and didn’t protect their skin in the process, the UV rays have damaged it.Photoaging is one term for it and it can lead to things like wrinkles, hyperpigmentation, and a loss of skin’s elasticity. And while it is indeed true that the extra melanin in our skin helps to slow down the aging process, never fall for the okey-doke that you don’t need sunscreen as well.
That said if you’d prefer an all-natural DIY alternative, mix some shea butter and pure organic aloe vera gel together. Not only willshea butter help to protect your skin from the damage that the sun can do, but it will also moisturize it and protect it from cellular damage; plus, it’s rich in vitamins A and E. As far asaloe vera gel goes, it will deeply hydrate your skin, work to prevent sun damage from happening in the first place and, if you happen to have eczema or psoriasis, it can reduce inflammation and irritation that spending time in the sun may trigger too.
6. Drink Some Black Tea
If you’re a tea drinker, the fact thatblack tea can help you to live longer (by reducing your risk for heart disease and a stroke), is already enough of a reason to drink it on a consistent basis. However, as far as slowing down the signs of aging goes, another dope thing about black tea is it contains antioxidants that canprotect your skin from sun damage from the inside out. Plus,the polyphenols in them (which are basically organic compounds) can help to slow down the development of fine lines and wrinkles, slow down the gene that slows down the production of collagen in your system and, black tea is good at strengthening your hair over time as well.
7. Watch Those Straws
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OK, so last year, Allure published an article entitled, “Is Your Stanley Tumbler Changing Your Face?” Guess what the answer was? Basically, yes. Not if you suck on a straw every once in a while, but if you’re doing it constantly, you are very much so on your way to having more fine lines around your mouth than you probably would like. Now, is there some type of a workaround? Apparently, there aresome anti-wrinkle straws that are making their way into the marketplace space; however,being intentional about not pursing your lips together so much and also making sure that the skin around the outside of your lips is well-moisturized at all times? Those hacks also can come in pretty handy.
8. Exfoliate Your Hands and Your Neck
This point, I’ve stated before. Y’all, even before I reached the age that it personally mattered, if there was one thing that irked me to no end, it was seeing a woman whose face looked one age while her neck looked another. SMDH. Listen, it doesn’t matter how much you try, and conceal your actual years on this planet if you’re overlooking the needs of your neck and hands while doing it. Why? Well, if two things are gonna “tell on you,” they would be it. That’s why, aside from (of course) washing and moisturizing those parts of your body, it’s also important that you exfoliate them too.
When it comes to your neck,some dermatologists recommend doing the exfoliation process with a product that contains alpha-hydroxy acid. Another option is to exfoliate your neck and hands with an all-natural body scrub that’s made from fruit (some recipes arehere); ones like strawberries contain a “grit” that can help to remove dead skin while the antioxidants in them will help to give your skin a healthy glow.
9. Scrub Your Scalp
A part of the reason why I wrote the article, “10 Things Your Scalp Has BEEN Waiting For You To Do,” for the platform is because if there’s one part of our body that tends to not get the kind of pampering and care that it deserves, it’s our scalp. And,as far as TLC goes, one thing that is an absolute must is exfoliation on wash days. Not only will it help to break up dandruff flakes and get rid of dry skin that may cause itchiness and irritation, but scalp exfoliation is alsogreat for your hair overall. For one thing, it helps to remove any build-up that could be clogging your hair follicles, and it helps to reduce stress so that your hair can grow healthy and strong (which is always a plus as you get older).
10. Apply Horsetail Plant Oil
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Speaking of hair,since it’s been reported that more than half of women over 50 will experience some level of at least semi-noticeable hair thinning or hair loss,in part due to the changes that come along with perimenopause and menopause, horsetail plant oil is something else that you might want to keep in your possession.The silicon and antioxidants in the oil will help to prevent hair thinning and the phenolic compounds in it will help to keep oxidative stress and damage at bay.
11. Deep Breathe
As far as your health is concerned, you may have already heard or read somewhere that deep breathing can help to reduce stress (and sincea lot of serious health issues are directly tied to stress, that’s a good thing to keep in mind).However, did you also know that since deep breathing can make you calmer, that can ultimately help your body to produce more collagen which, in turn, can help you to look youthful? Yep, by devoting just five minutes, twice a day, to deeply inhale and exhale, you can get anxiety off your back while alsobringing more oxygen to your skin, which helps with cell renewal and rejuvenation.
12. Sleep on Your Back
And finally, how do you sleep? Is it on your stomach? On your side? Or on your back? If the answer is “C,” even if you’re just doing it for comfort’s sake, you are actually benefitting your health on a few different levels.Sleeping on your back helps you to breathe better, can help to clear up sinus, headache, neck, and back tension; and, because your face is not rubbing against your pillow and sheets all night long, it just might reduce the chances of you experiencing breakouts too. Also, as far as aging goes, since moving around on your bedding can also create friction on your skin that can ultimately result in fine lines — well, that’s just one more reason to consider sleeping on your back, at least a couple of times a week.
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See, I told you. By just making a few minor adjustments to your lifestyle (and doing them consistently), you can be well on your way to being one age and looking another. Try these and tell me it ain’t so!
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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I’ve gotta say that, for the most part, my friends are pretty damn chill. There is one (major) exception, though — and it’s an odd one. Even after all these years and countless times of me giving them the same answer, if there is a time when they think they are my mama, it’s when they see an email come through at an odd hour of the night. Then, all of a sudden, here they come asking me when do I get sleep if I’m emailing at (say) three in the morning.
Again, the answer never changes because, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna get, it’s 6-8 (sometimes nine) hours of sleep. However, since my chronotype (check out “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”) means that I like/prefer to write in the wee hours of the morning, sometimes I will sleep for the night for five hours and take a nap in the day. And y’all, that is just fine with me because I am well aware of the fact that napping does everything from give me more energy, heighten my alertness and even make me more creative to decrease stress levels, strengthen immunity, and reduce my chances of experiencing a heart attack or stroke.
My problem is I will oftentimes go “overboard” with my daytime zzz’s. What I mean by that is, in order to get the most out of a nap, they say thatyou shouldn’t sleep for longer than 25 minutes or so; otherwise, you could wake up feeling sluggish (I don’t but…). Also, it can make resting, soundly, at night a bit of a struggle.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? We should get quickies in? Yeah. And it’s funny that the word “quickie” would come up because just like a sex quickie can do wonders for you (and it can — check out “12 Super Solid Reasons To Have A Quickie Every Single Day”), it’s a full-circle moment when I say that something that can improve the quality of your sex life is to have a power nap (a nap that lasts between 10-30 minutes).
Wanna know how the two things correlate? Honestly, it’s no secret that sleep and sex work together to optimize both (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”). Today, though, we’re going to tap into how a nap, specifically, can have you partaking in some of the best sex that you’ve experienced in a minute. I’ll explain.
Naps Reduce Stress
If you’re feeling super stressed out right now, you are not alone. There is plenty of data out here that says that most of us are stressed for at least a couple of reasons at a time — and that can impact your sexual health on a few levels. For one thing, it can bring about feelings of depression and/or anxiety. Stress can also throw your hormone levels off (including your cycle) which can weaken your libido. Stress can make you want to put distance between you and your partner (yes, literally).
Stress can also make it challenging to get aroused or to have an orgasm. And just what can help to decrease stress? Taking a nap. Since sleep has a way of helping you to “get off of the clock” and relax a bit, that can lower your stress levels and “reset” your body so that you are calmer — and that, in turn, can do wonders for your sex drive and ultimately your sex life.
Naps Improve Your Mood
There is one person in my life, and fairly 80 percent of the time, she’s in a super good mood. Oh, but let that girl go without sleep, and…who is this woman? LOL. There’s research behind why this happens. When a person is sleep-deprived, it messes with their brain chemicals, and that can amplify emotions like anger, restlessness and sadness. In fact, one study revealed that people who had their sleep disrupted throughout the night, they ended up having their positive outlook on life reduced by about 30 percent.
And geeze, who wants to have sex when they’re not feeling very good? Anyway, since serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps to regulate your moods, your sleep patterns, and your libido and sleep is what helps to keep it in balance — by taking a nap, not only can it help you to feel better, it can also increase your desire for sex (it can also build up your endurance which is also…sexually beneficial).
Naps Increase Your Focus and Concentration
Something that some of my clients bring up is how, when it comes to having sex, sometimes the flesh is willing while the spirit is weak because, although the desire for intimacy is there, so much is going on that they aren’t able to get still enough to focus on experiencing copulation with their partner. This also tracks because, when you don’t have enough rest, your brain finds itself not working in harmony and that can make it hard to do everything from approaching life with a sense of flexibility to making necessary decisions.
Certain data also reveal that a lack of rest can cause you to have a really poor attention span and not process things in context (the more you know). So, if you really want to get some yet it’s hard for you to focus long enough to make it happen, ask your bae to lie down with you and take a nap. Between the sleep and the snuggling (check out “Fall's Coming: 8 Wonderful Health Benefits Of Cuddling”) — you may wake up with your mind and body totally on the same page. #wink
Naps Can Make You Feel Better About Your Body
Even if, overall, you feel really good about your body, I think that we all have moments when we feel less attractive than others — and who wants to have sex when they don’t really feel…very sexy? Well, something else that sleep, in general, can do is increase your confidence in your body.
For one thing, if you want to lose a few pounds, sleep can actually make that happen by helping your body metabolize the glucose (sugar) that’s in it so that you can better manage your appetite. Other studies go on to share that since sleep deprivation can impact one’s mental health and emotional stability in a negative way, of course, getting enough rest would increase body positivity.
Shoot, science even goes so far as to say that insomnia can cause people to have an elevated level of dissatisfaction when it comes to their body image. Don’t take their word for it, though. Look in the mirror before a nap. Then look in a mirror after waking up from me. Do you feel better? I’d be surprised if you don’t.
Makes Your Brain Bigger…Which Could Make Your Orgasms Better
I saved the best for last by design. Now if you’re wondering how in the world a nap can improve (and possibly increase) your orgasms — oh, there is a method to the madness…trust. For starters, the saying that your biggest sex organ is your brain? That isn’t a myth. Long story less long, the brain is what houses your central nervous system and that is what controls how men and women sexually function (yes, literally).
And since the brain also releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin during sex and brain activity significantly increases in women during sexual activity (especially right before she orgasms) — well, would it trip you out to know that when you take a nap, your brain actually expands? A bigger brain (that’s healthy) can potentially intensify your sexual experiences (and your climaxes) — and who doesn’t want that to go down?
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Like I said earlier, I never have to be convinced to get a nap in. However, if your sex life has been a bit stagnant lately, you’ve been feeling a little sluggish and you’re not sure what to do — I’m hoping that a nap can get you right.
There’s enough science to prove that it can. All you need to do is give it a shot.
Now where’s your pillow and sleep mask, chile?
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