There’s nothing quite like opening a good book and getting transported to another place, period, or frame of thought. In the blink of an eye, you are a part of a character’s life, an author’s world. Another great aspect about reading books is that not only does it serve as a source of entertainment and education, it also boosts your brain and emotional health. Research shows that “regular reading can lower blood pressure, reduce stress, and improve sleep quality.”
But if I’m honest, getting lost in a reading session was much easier as a child. I had no full-time job, no child to run after, or other major responsibilities, so of course, finishing a book in one sitting was an easy task. And with reading programs like Pizza Hut BOOK IT! (I know I'm aging myself with this one), I was rewarded for doing an activity I already loved!
As I got older, I'd go through periods of reading for enjoyment, but somewhere along the way, reading became harder for me to prioritize. I had the desire to read more books, but couldn’t figure out how to get it done. Does this sound familiar to you? If so, follow along as I share my tips on how to read more books this year!
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Read More of What You Enjoy
Life is too short to read books you don't love! I used to carry the misguided mindset that my taste in books should "mature" as I age. I'd force myself to primarily read non-fiction or self-help books because that's what I thought I should be reading. But, no, that’s just not me. Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy those genres, but I’ve loved women’s fiction, contemporary fiction, and YA for decades and won’t stop any time soon.
Whether you're into science-fiction, faith and spirituality, memoirs, romance, thrillers, comic books, or non-fiction, the goal is to love whatever you're reading.
Choose a Mode of Reading
Physical Books
I derive a lot of comfort from holding a book in my hands and turning page after page. And don't get me started on the smell of the printed paper! If you nerd out over printed books like me, build your personal library with titles you adore! But before you visit a major bookseller, consider buying from your local independent bookstore. Websites like Bookshop.org give you access to local stores in your area that can benefit from your support.
If you’d rather not own a bunch of books, get a library card. Not only will you save money, but you’ll support your local library and, by extension, your community.
Audiobooks
As a working mother, it’s hard for me to sit still long enough to open a physical book, so I’ve had to default to audiobooks—and you know what? —I love them! You can easily listen to a book in your car, as you work out, cook, or wait for your girlfriends to show up for brunch. Platforms like Libby and Boundless link with your library card to give you access to thousands of books. If you prefer to read words on a screen, then I suggest electronic or e-books that you can read on your phone or a Kindle device.
Set a Reading Goal, Then Read Whenever You Can
You'll read more if you have an attainable goal broken down into pieces. For instance, if you plan to read a book in one week, divide the total number of pages by seven for a daily goal. Divide by however many days of the month there are for a monthly goal, and so on.
Reading first thing in the morning may work for some, but isn’t feasible for others. Instead, note the time of day you have the most availability. It helps to know when you have the most energy to read and what setting you're most comfortable in, too. Ultimately, if you want to read more books, you've got to spend more time reading.
Start a reading session while you wait at the DMV, during commercial breaks, or on your bus or train commute. Not everyone has time to dig into a book for hours, however, every bit matters– even if it's for five minutes at a time.
Read With Others
Reading with a friend or a group is a great way to hold yourself accountable to your reading goals and gush over what you love (or don’t love) about what you’re reading.
Book clubs are an easy way to find other book lovers. You can build your literary network of folks who enjoy the same books as you but also challenge you to step out of your comfort zone.
Through my virtual book club, I’ve read thrillers, historical fiction, and books with fantasy elements—all of which are genres I wouldn’t gravitate to on my own. By doing so, I ended up liking a few and exposed myself to different styles of writing.
What I love most about book clubs is that you can find or create one that meets your needs. Do you only want to read books written by African authors? There’s a club for that. Want to meet in person in your area or meet from the comfort of your home? Easy. Prefer to read a book of your choosing next to others who are doing the same thing, and then briefly recap what you’ve read? Silent book clubs exist for this very reason! Utilize social media and sites like Meetup.com to help get you started.
Keep Track of Your Reading Progress
Finishing a book is an accomplishment worth celebrating and recording. You can jot the titles on your own or keep track by using a platform. Sites like StoryGraph (hello, Black-woman-owned business!) and Goodreads are an easy way to read and write reviews, set reading challenges, and find community. I promise you'll look back at the end of the month or year and feel so proud of the number of books you've finished when you keep track of what you’ve read.
Whether you’re a seasoned reader who’s itching to reach a new goal or you’re new to reading as a hobby, I hope these tips encourage you to read more this year. Don’t feel pressured to stick to only one genre or use only one method to read. It’s perfectly fine to adopt a hybrid approach to reading if that works well for you.
Take your time to figure out a setting and rhythm that inspires you to dive into a story. The goal is to create a reading practice that fits into your life– not add stress to it. Happy reading, friends!
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RELATED
While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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What Is a Praise Kink?
The concept of praise kinks isn't new, but thanks to TikTok, a lot of people are now realizing they might identify as praise kinksters. Currently, the hashtag #praisek1nk is trending with 568.9 million views, with tons of creators posting about their love for compliments and words of affirmation during sex. I, too, love a good compliment during sex. I once had a lover sing my praises about how good I was at a certain bedroom activity. His affirmations gave me WAP, but does that categorize me as having a praise kink?
How To Know if You Have a Praise Kink
Just because you love receiving praise doesn’t mean you have a praise kink. Someone with a praise kink experiences an intense level of sexual excitement from being praised or verbally affirmed by their partner during sex. You might have a praise kink if hearing your partner tell you how pretty you are makes you cum or if the thing that makes sex go from good to great is hearing your partner's thoughts about how good you are at giving head. And if, during solo play, the thing that gets you all hot and bothered is recalling the times your partner called you a good girl, it’s probably a praise kink.
Generally, a kink is a sexual activity that is needed for someone to enjoy sex. When it comes specifically to praise kinks, if you need reassurance from your partner that you're sexy, or good in bed in order to orgasm, you have a praise kink.
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Examples of Praise Kink Phrases To Try With Your Partner
If you’re new to the term and looking to explore, you probably have questions about what phrases to use. It may take a lot of communication and some trial and error to figure out what phrases work best for you and your partner. Ultimately, the best phrases to use vary from person to person and are based on what sex acts you and your partner enjoy, or what parts of their body they like complimented.
To get you started, here are some generic praise kink examples to try out with your partner:
Praise Kink Examples:
- You're such a good girl/boy.
- You're so good at [insert skill].
- You look so hot when you [insert activity].
- Your [insert body part] is irresistible.
- You taste so good. I can't get enough of you.
- You just have the perfect [body part].
- Just like that… you’re doing so good.
- Who taught you how to be so good at [something?]
While many examples of praise kink involve specific verbal affirmations, praise can also come in the form of brief words or phrases like “yes,” “keep going,” or simply a moan. No matter what type you prefer, praise kink is all about finding what feels good and exciting, and turns you and your partner on the most.
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Originally published on November 4, 2022