

We all know the feeling. Right before our cycle hits and not too long after a fibrous meal, we get the bulky discomfort in our stomach known as bloating. It’s similar to the feeling of having a balloon in your belly, making you feel swollen, puffy, and well, gassy. Bloating is a common digestive issue that many people experience at some point in their lives and is characterized by a feeling of fullness, tightness, and swelling in the abdomen, often accompanied by gas and discomfort.
Bloating can be caused by a variety of things. Maybe you ate a little too much food and now your stomach is processing the build-up of gas. Or maybe your hormones are regulating in preparation for the time of the month. Whatever the case may be, while bloating is a common occurrence in our body, it’s an uncomfortable feeling that you don’t have to live with once you identify the cause of it.
In fact, bloating could be revealing something important about our body that we may want to listen to. “It’s letting us know that something in our digestive system isn't quite right,” Carlie Saint-Laurent Beaucejour, MS, RD, LDN, registered dietitian nutritionist tells xoNecole. “It's a way for our body to let us know that it may have too much gas or air coming in. Or it could be something deeper depending on how frequently you get bloating.”
According to Saint-Laurent Beaucejour, "one in seven people experience bloating throughout the week, so it is a common bodily function. But just because something is common doesn't mean that's necessarily normal."
What Causes Bloating?
One of the primary causes of bloating is the consumption of gas-producing foods, such as beans, broccoli, onions, and cabbage. These foods contain complex carbohydrates that are difficult for the body to digest, leading to the production of gas in the gut. Other dietary factors that can contribute to bloating include eating too quickly, overeating, and consuming high-fat or spicy foods.
“What I see in my practice when someone says they’re bloated, it comes down to their diet,” she says. “Food definitely has an impact in causing bloating. Certain foods do produce gas, like cruciferous vegetables and beans, so someone's diet can be a common cause.” From what we eat to how we eat, Saint-Laurent Beaucejour says that when it comes down to our digestion, it all starts in the mouth. “Even how you chew your food can impact you if your food goes down too quickly. How you chew your food and swallow it affects digestion.”
In addition to dietary factors, certain lifestyle habits can also cause bloating. Swallowing air while eating or drinking can lead to the accumulation of gas in the digestive tract, along with chewing gum, drinking carbonated beverages, and smoking. One surprising discovery is that even not eating can make someone experience bloating in an unexpected way. “So many people are going long periods of time without eating. This can cause gassiness from excess air because you're just breathing but not eating,” she shares.
With so many causes of bloating, how do you determine the reason behind yours? For Saint-Laurent Beaucejour, it’s all about paying close attention to our bodies. “Really get curious — what did I eat recently? Have I done anything differently in my routine? Is there a particular food or food group that every time I do eat it, I'm noticing the symptoms?” she shares.
In order to keep track of these changes, Saint-Laurent Beaucejour says that food journaling is a helpful practice that she encourages her clients to implement on their health journey. “Food journaling can be helpful in determining and noticing the patterns of how you're eating. With food journaling, it's not so much that you are getting enough calories. It's more about paying attention to your daily habits,” she says. Listening, slowing down and food journaling can definitely be a way to see the cause of bloating.”
"Food journaling can be helpful in determining and noticing the patterns of how you're eating. With food journaling, it's not so much that you are getting enough calories. It's more about paying attention to your daily habits."
And while there always seems to be a new supplement and powders circulating online that promises to relieve our bloating, Saint-Laurent Beaucejour advises that one-size-fits-all remedies should be assessed with cautious curiosity. “I am a believer of personalized nutrition. Do what works for you. And if it's food-related, put food first,” she shares. “If you’re bloated and want to add supplements, can we get those nutrients incorporated into the foods from those green powders (like lettuce and kale) from actual food?”
She continues, “We're all different. Some research does back it up, but understand that these studies are sample sizes, they're not you as an individual. That's why meeting with a dietician or healthcare professional who can focus on you is so important.”
The first step to alleviating bloating is to identify and address your unique, underlying cause. And while bloating usually subsides spontaneously within a 24-hour period, it’s always helpful to have a few remedies and solutions in your back pocket for when bloating hits.
Reset Your Mindset
“I know my dietician, but it also comes down to self-talk and mindset. When you see bloating around your period, that can really mess with your head. Like, what am I doing? Why am I gaining this weight? But understand that bloating is temporary for the most part and for most people. Listen to your body and see what could be triggering it. Practice mindful eating by taking your time with eating, not rushing it, and chewing your food thoroughly so you can help your stomach not work as hard.”
Move Your Body
“Incorporate movement when you’re bloated. Take a 15-minute walk, ride a bike, or even just stretch to get my digestive system going.”
Stay Hydrated
“Hydration is something that we may not be getting enough of. So making sure you're staying hydrated, getting enough water, and avoiding foods that can dehydrate you like alcohol and caffeine is key.”
Natural Remedies
“Try drinking ginger and peppermint teas. I’m Caribbean, so we put cloves in a lot of our dishes. One of the reasons why we put cloves in our rice and beans is to help reduce that gassiness and bloating — so cloves can be very helpful.”
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Aley Arion is a writer and digital storyteller from the South, currently living in sunny Los Angeles. Her site, yagirlaley.com, serves as a digital diary to document personal essays, cultural commentary, and her insights into the Black Millennial experience. Follow her at @yagirlaley on all platforms!
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
Love Is The Muse: How Skylar And Temi Built A Creative Life Together
When Temitope Ibisanmi DM’d the word “muse” to Skylar Marshai, he knew he was shooting his romantic shot. He didn’t realize, however, that he was connecting with his future business and creative partner, too.
“I was the boyfriend,” Temi says. “Everybody out there knows, you’re the cameraman at that point.”
Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Today, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak