The room was a kind of sticky warmth that hinted that nobody was leaving without a good sweat.
I clipped my shoes onto the pedals and began to cycle slowly, warming up my stiff calf muscles as I mentally prepared for the workout ahead. The door closed shut, leaving me and a handful of others in a nearly dark room, lights dimmed and candles flickering at the front of the instructors' stage. Dani Robertson paced back and forth, warmly greeting individuals with smiles and promises of a judgment free zone where old and new comers could relax and unwind. There were no real rules but one—you had to quiet the negative thoughts for the entire 45-minute SoulCycle session and “choose happy."
“In my classes I like to call it 'happy hour,'" Robertson says. “It's basically a time where you go to class and set your own intention. You want to go and get some things off your chest. You want to sweat."
The idea of choosing to be happy—choosing to live a life that you love—may seem foreign to some and impossible to many, but for Robertson, it's become her life mantra. At 27, she's chosen a path where many fear to go, one where you eradicate self-doubt and ratify possibility. A year ago, Robertson wouldn't have guessed that she'd leave behind her "traditional" job in ad sales to venture into a career path that is still somewhat undefined, and three months ago you couldn't have told her that she would be leading a room of others on their own individual journeys of freedom and self-awareness.
Growing up in Atlanta, Georgia, Robertson didn't know what she wanted to do with her life. She tried sports and various activities in hopes of finding the one thing that made her feel “full," but all came up short when it came to fulfillment—or purpose.
What she did know was that she wanted something that made her feel alive and motivated her to wake up every morning in anticipation of the day ahead. Although money was important, it wasn't the motive. Living with just her mom and twin brother she understood the hunger for it, but refused to feed into it. “I realized at a young age that money is just a means to an end; it doesn't really complete anything internally," Robertson says. “I knew that people feared money. I knew it was something that was needed in order to do good and live a certain lifestyle. But I knew I wasn't going to allow that to bully me into a lifestyle that I didn't want."
"I realized at a young age that money is just a means to an end."
After graduating from Georgia State University, she took a job in New York at a publicity agency that she interned with the previous summer, but after two months of waking up to a job that robbed her of her joy, she quit. “I was like I can't be this miserable. I can't look forward to another week of this misery."
Thanks to a few connections and a surprisingly good interview, she snagged a position in ad sales at Nickelodeon. But like the previous job, she had a gnawing feeling that she was settling for a steady paycheck. “I've always believed in my heart that everybody knows how they feel within themselves," says Robertson. “It's nothing that they can describe. Everyone has their thing that they know deep within their heart, and one of the things that I knew was that I always felt like I was supposed to be happy. I always thought that was something I was supposed to always feel. I expected to feel it."
Thinking that a change of scenery would do the trick, Robertson left behind her New York lifestyle and transferred to the L.A. office under the assumption that the more laid-back atmosphere and sun-filled days would be just the antidote to her career woes. “I thought that would do it. I thought that would break the chain, and it didn't."
Robertson was unsure of her next steps, but remained opened to new experiences that would reveal the answer. When a friend invited her to the gun range she obliged (though she firmly states that she's against gun violence), and found herself gripping a shotgun, too scared to pull the trigger. “I was petrified. I did everything that you had to do and all I had to do was pull the trigger. It was probably the most symbolic moment of my life. I remember telling my friend I'm not ready; I don't think I have a good grip. And all I had to do was make my index finger move, and I was afraid. I somehow told my finger to move and I did it and then it was like everything was fine. It was like trusting what I believe in my heart and that I should be happy, and that if it doesn't make me happy, then for lack of a better reference, pull the trigger."
But as the experience showed her, firing the proverbial gun was easier said than done. She left Nickelodeon at the end of the summer, and by fall she was working in ad sales at Quantcast—a company that she describes as good, but not good enough. “Good is awesome, but in my life it's not good enough. I should reach for great and excellent, and I should literally max out what I can do. Good is cool, but if there's more, why don't I deserve to get more?"
Robertson stayed a few more months but her mind had already left the job, and as one door prepared to close, signs lit the path to another that stood open. The first came in the form of a friend, who encouraged Robertson to try out a SoulCycle class. The session proved to be both physically and emotionally challenging, forcing her to push beyond her limits as tears streamed down her cheeks. After one session she was hooked. “There were certain instructors who could literally call that out of me. They would inspire me to work harder, and I was moved, but I was scared. It was like I would love to do that, but I can't. That's not even my vibe. It just wasn't me, but I kept riding as rider."
Robertson quieted the thought of leading the pack until once again purpose gave her a nudge while attending a SoulCycle session at Oprah's “Live the Life You Want" tour. “I don't believe in coincidences; I believe that everything happens on purpose and with reason, and so it was there so I was like okay cool. It's a sign."
"I don't believe in coincidences; I believe that everything happens on purpose and with reason."
She took on a part-time position as a front-desk attendant at the Santa Monica studio while continuing to work full-time at her job and attending class as a rider, but by the spring she once again felt that it was time leave her full-time position to pursue the one thing that brought her fulfillment. “I remember being on the bike like this is fun, this is ridiculously fun. It was an amazing pressure to literally figure out what I wanted to do and what I loved, and what I cared enough to wake up early in the morning for. “
In her downtime, she also focused on finding happiness within herself through reading and meditation, what she refers to as training. “Sometimes your mind is so chaotic that it just won't settle down. You go to bed at night and you can't focus. You want to fall asleep but you can't fall asleep, and you have to be able to calm yourself down and get your mind to be at peace. So I learned a lot about that. I really just got in touch with me and what I wanted and what I thought I wanted, and I was riding more. I could tell that I was just feeling better."
During one particular session she unknowingly rode next to a scout. A week later she ran into the same woman on her way down the escalator when the scout stopped and asked if she ever considered being an instructor. “It was such a moment of validation and I was extremely shy at the moment. It's the sweetest compliment you can ever get, like you can do what you never thought you could do. It really opened me up emotionally."
After going through an intensive training program—one that challenged her core values and gave her an even deeper understanding of who she is—she was ready to guide others on their quest for finding their own happiness. “I've had certain riders tell me, 'Wow you really made my week' or 'I never thought I'd cry,'" she recalls excitedly. “Like this is real life. This is how life should feel. We should be moved."
And in Robertson's class you'll feel just that. As I pedaled feverishly over the next 45-minutes, I challenged myself to be present, to tap into the thoughts and emotions that often spill onto the pages of my journal and in the occasional text message to a confidant. As she sporadically shouted out affirmations I reflected on my own dreams and goals, and asked myself the same question that she did just a year ago: Why don't I deserve to get more?
“So often I was held back by fear. A beautiful quote that I heard is 'feel the fear, but do it anyway.' Don't run from fear but go deep within it. That's how you get rid of it and that's how you get better.
If you sit there and your life becomes average or not what you want it to be then it was your decision. And I just always felt that I was more powerful than fear."
Likewise, girl. Likewise.
Want to #chooseHappy and ride out with Dani? Head over to the SoulCycle location in Downtown Los Angeles.
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Yara Shahidi Shares Her Formula For Manifesting The Career Of Her Dreams
Yara Shahidi is a walking testimony of what it looks like to live out your wildest dreams, and she has managed to do it all in the harsh limelight of Hollywood without selling her soul. From acting and producing to hosting The Optimist Project podcast with SiriusXM to being a full-time college student at Harvard, now graduate, the 24-year-old has built a career that inspires while staying true to her values.
But how does she balance such a demanding yet "well-rounded" life while continuing to manifest new opportunities?
In a recent episode of The School of Greatness podcast with Lewis Howes, Yara opened up about her unique formula that has been instrumental to her success: following her curiosity. When asked how she manifests things in her life, Yara explained to the host, “There are many different ways. For some of the bigger things, it really is kinda getting downloads and moments of like, ‘Oh, I think that’s next.’”
She added, “Chasing curiosity means that my purpose is constantly unfolding in front of me. All I have to do is pay attention.” She described these intuitive “downloads” as waves of excitement or curiosity, deeper than that, as moments that spark her interest and give her clues about what to pursue next.
"Chasing curiosity means that my purpose is constantly unfolding in front of me. All I have to do is pay attention."
“A lot of what I think I’m interested in tackling comes from a wave of curiosity,” she said. “Like, for some reason, this is grabbing my attention, and I really couldn’t tell you why.” For Yara, those seemingly random sparks often turn into something deeper and more meaningful for the Bloom actress. She even recalled her podcast The Optimist Project flourishing as a result of a seed planted in her mind as a result of those waves of curiosity.
Whether it’s exploring new roles in her career or partnerships in the world of fashion and endorsements, her method of following the lead of those curiosities has led to incredible results.
One story Yara shared illustrated the power of curiosity-driven manifestation. Seemingly out of nowhere, she wrote down every endorsement deal she thought of having, not as a goal-oriented thing, but more so just writing down on a whim different brands that came to her head as a result of the sparks she is often led by.
Two years later, she realized she and her team had accomplished every single one. “It truly starts as this vision board,” she explained as she recounted the power of her and her team’s alignment on their curiosities. By letting her curiosity guide her, she’s been able to align those visions with the right opportunities. “What do we see?” she asks herself and her team, emphasizing the importance of shared alignment and intention in calling in the right opportunities for her life.
Curiosity is more than just a passing feeling for Yara, in fact, it’s a practice. From her TED Talk on the subject to her daily approach to life, she’s made it clear that tuning into what sparks joy and excitement is her formula for success. She noted that the curiosities are the true start of it all and the analytics or the “how” of achieving the goal comes later.
For Yara, it’s simple: let curiosity lead and trust the path to reveal itself.
Her journey reminds us that curiosity is often the key to uncovering our true purpose. By paying attention to what excites us, we can create a life that aligns with our values and dreams. As Yara’s story shows, following our curiosity might just be the first step toward manifesting the career and life we’ve always imagined.
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Featured image by Cindy Ord/Getty Images