Here we are. Right on the brink of cold, flu and COVID season combined. And who would've thought that when it comes to proactively fighting these viruses as well as combating some of the symptoms that come right along with them, having sex would be a truly effective, all-natural and totally satisfying remedy?
Before getting into that, though, I think it's important to put on record that while the cold, flu and COVID are all viruses, they are not one and the same. While I'm pretty sure you hear about what makes COVID, well, the way that it is ad nauseum (you can check out some CDC info here), as you're navigating through things like fevers, sore throats, coughing, congestion, headaches, fatigue, shortness of breath and other things that can make being sick an absolute nightmare, it's important to keep in mind that while a cold and the flu are both respiratory viruses, the flu has much more severe symptoms.
Not only that but the first 3-4 days are when you typically catch the brunt of it all with colds and the flu taking 1-2 weeks to fully get past. It's also important to keep in mind that if you happen to have a fever, chills and a load of fatigue, that is usually not a common cold; that's usually the flu; however, if you're not exactly sure, you can always make an appointment to see your doctor (because again, COVID).
Now with all of that out of the way, how in the world does copulation (and/or oral sex) prove to be just about as effective as "an apple a day keeps the doctor away"? Sit tight. You might just be surprised.
Sex Lowers Your Stress Levels
There's nothing good that comes from being stressed out all of the time. That's why I'm such a huge supporter of people being extremely proactive when it comes to balancing out the stress triggers that are in their life. That said, I'm pretty sure it comes as no shocker to you that when you are stressed, it can compromise your immune system (more on that in just a sec). When that happens, your body can actually produce flu-like symptoms (ugh). That's the bad news. The good news is when you have sex, it raises your endorphin and oxytocin levels which are both feel-good hormones. Sex also has the ability to lower your cortisol (your natural stress hormone) levels as well as your blood pressure — and when it comes to managing stress, that is always a good thing.
Sex Boosts Your Immunity
There is absolutely no way that you can fight off viruses that lead to sickness if your immune system is shot. One way you can do that is by checking out the article, "Ready To Try 10 Quick & Easy Immune-Boosting Hacks?" on our site. Matter of fact, one of the points in it happens to give sex a big ole' shout-out. While it's kind of a long and scientific tale, the main reason why sex is so great for your immunity is because it helps your system to produce the kind of antibodies that are able to fight off viruses, bacteria and other germs that could lead to you not feeling very well. So, if you've not been making sex much of a priority these days, here's a really solid reason why you should definitely consider doing so.
Sperm/Semen Is a Multivitamin
An article that I wrote for the site a couple of years ago that received quite a bit of traction was, "Do You Swallow? The Unexpected Health Benefits Of Sperm". While I know that going down/giving head may not be everybody's cup of tea (check out "Sooo...What If You HATE Oral?"), there's absolutely no way around the fact that sperm and semen (the fluid that carries sperm) are literally like a multivitamin. They're packed with protein, vitamins B12 and C, zinc, calcium, magnesium, potassium, citrate, sugar, sodium, melatonin and more with a teaspoon of it equaling to around a stick of gum (five or so calories).
Since sperm/semen also contain oxytocin and progesterone, not only can they help to strengthen your immune system, they can help to get — or keep — you in a good mood too. Sperm/semen also have a great reputation for helping to decrease depression-related symptoms, speed up the healing process of wounds, fight aging signs, reduce inflammation and increase your overall lifespan. Plus, since the cold nor the flu can be spread via sexual fluids (sperm, semen or vaginal fluids), that's one more reason to consider giving sperm/semen a shot (pun intended); especially as a "intercourse alternative" until you're up to feeling better.
Kissing Increases Your Immunoglobulin A (IgA) Levels
If you like to kiss a lot and you rarely ever get sick, there could be a correlation between the two. Something that is located within the mucous membranes of your lungs, sinuses, stomach, intestines and bodily fluids are antibodies known as Immunoglobulin A (IgA). These are cool because they help your body to get better at fighting off illnesses.
So, when you and your partner exchange saliva, you are actually increasing each other's IgA levels. There are even studies which cite that having sex 1-2 times a week can significantly boost your IgA levels too. Crazy, huh?
Orgasms Can Clear Up Congestion
Are you someone who fakes orgasms? If so, this is a good reason to quit — right here and right now. Believe it or not, experiencing an orgasm can help to clear up a clogged up nose! While scientists and medical professionals are still trying to unpack exactly why this is the case, what they believe is, going through all of the phases of an orgasm — excitement, plateau, orgasm and resolution — can work together to help to clear out your nasal passages. And since a stuffy nose is one of the most annoying things about being sick, this is definitely some pretty good food for thought.
Orgasms Are a Natural Pain Reliever
Remember how I gave a shout-out to endorphins earlier in this piece? Another benefit that comes from them is they're a natural painkiller. So, whenever you are touched or touched, that helps to stimulate the release of them. In fact, there is plenty of data to support that sex helps to reduce the discomfort that is associated with headaches and even migraines. Sex can help to soothe body aches too. So, if you happen to be someone who tries and avoids sex when your head is pounding, according to science, it's something that you actually should be totally open to running to instead of away from. Let me tell it, it beats the hell outta Advil and NyQuil. Maybe that's just me, though.
Certain Positions Can Reduce the Chance of Spreading Germs
Even though viruses like colds and the flu cannot be spread via sexual fluids, they can when someone coughs or sneezes (which is why still wearing a mask during this pandemic is so important). That's why you can definitely still run the risk of getting your partner sick if you decide to have sex while you are contagious (which is around two weeks with a cold or COVID and 3-7 days for the flu). Still, if you want to be able to get into some of the benefits that sex provides after the first few days of falling ill, the key is to get into positions where you and your partner aren't exactly face to face like spooning, doggy style and/or reverse cowgirl.
Sex Improves Your Quality of Sleep
One way that you can definitely make yourself vulnerable when it comes to catching a virus is not getting enough sleep ("getting enough" means sleeping no less than 6-8 hours every night, not every once in a while). That's because a result of sleep deprivation is a weakened immune system and, as we already addressed, the worse off your immune system is, the more susceptible you are to falling ill. I think we all can attest to the fact that a good round of sex can produce some of the best sleep EVER. That's because sex increases hormones like oxytocin, prolactin, progesterone, endorphins and dopamine — all of which help you to feel really good as they relax your system and calm your mind as well.
Like I said, virus 2.0 season is right in our faces (pun intended); that's unavoidable. But if you're open to having more sex than usual, you literally increase your chances of avoiding them. I can't think of a more gratifying, pleasurable and rewarding way to do it either. I really can't.
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Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and SkylarCj Hart @hartbreakToday, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak