

Sometimes, when a married couple comes to me and says that they are struggling with feeling truly connected with each other, I'll recommend that they have sex, every day, for a month (check out "Having Sex Every Day. For A Month. Straight. Can Transform Your Marriage."). I won't lie to you. Some of them end up looking at me like I have totally lost my mind. In fact, oftentimes the initial response/reaction will be, "Who has the time to do all of that?!" I mean, we've all got 24 hours in a day, right? On average, many of us easily spend as much as 2 ½ hours on our various social media accounts and sex? Well, men can climax in around five minutes and it takes us somewhere between 20-25 (foreplay included). So yeah—seems to me that if you've got almost three hours to be on Instagram or TikTok, you've easily got 30 minutes to copulate.
And here's the thing—aside from the sheer pleasure that sex (well, at least good sex) offers, there are so many other reasons why making it a top priority, yes on a daily basis, is something that you really should strongly consider doing. If you hear me but you're not fully convinced, I've got 10 (and there are so many more than this) strong arguments for why sex—and more specifically, climaxing during the act—should become as essential as having three meals a day. Every day.
1. Orgasms Will Make Your Immune System Will Be Stronger
Without a strong immune system, our health is consistently compromised. And guess what? The more orgasms you have, the stronger your immunity ends up becoming as a direct result. First up, sex is a pretty good form of exercise (per 24-minute session, men can burn about 100 calories and we can burn around, pardon the pun, 69) and when we get cardio in, it helps our body to fight off germs and free radicals. Also, the more we have sex, the more our immunoglobulin levels (the antibodies in our blood) increase; if we orgasm, they go up even more. Another cool point is when we have orgasms, we actually give our body a nice lil' lymphatic massage. The awesome thing about that is when this part of our body is stimulated, toxins are able to leave our body easier. And that's always a good thing.
2. Orgasms Will Help You Stress Will Be Less
Nothing and no one is worth you stressing yourself out. I mean it. Stress is linked to heart disease, asthma, diabetes, depression, obesity, accelerated aging, and even premature death. Well, something that is increased during an orgasm is oxytocin. What's dope about this particular hormone is it's got the nicknames "the happy hormone" and "the love hormone". That's because, a part of what it does, is send chemical messages to your brain to feel better and closer to your partner. Since both of these things help to relieve a significant amount of tension, you can probably get why having an orgasm can have you feeling like you're walking on clouds—and giggling incessantly while you're doing it.
3. You’ll Look Younger From Having Orgasms
Something that transpires during an orgasm is your body releases a hormone known as HGH. What that stands for is human growth hormone. Well, the amazing thing about this particular point is whenever you cum, HGH is released. Something that happens in connection with that is your system receives a surge of collagen which makes your skin look more soft, supple and radiant. Right. Folks be out here spending millions on department store creams when all they need is to get some more often. I've even read that having sex 2-3 times a week can cause you to look as much as 10 years younger over time.
4. You’ll Feel Sexier From Having Orgasms
When you get a chance, please check out the article, "10 Sensuous Ways To Boost Your Sexual Self-Esteem". There really is no way around the fact that having sex—again, good sex—makes you feel sexier. It's a great way to feel more comfortable in and confident about your body. It helps to affirm aspects of you that make you attractive and special. And, when you're able to give and achieve orgasms, it can bring forth an inner assurance and boldness that is completely unmatched.
5. Orgasms Will Cause Less Headaches to Happen
I'm not sure who came up with the "I've got a headache" as an excuse to not have sex. Whoever it was needs to have this article forwarded to them because actually, right after you orgasm, your oxytocin and endorphin levels surge to the point where any pain that you're feeling is able to significantly decrease. This includes discomfort that is associated with headaches and migraines. As a bonus, orgasms can also increase blood flow to your brain, which gives it more nutrients and ultimately makes you mentally sharper as well.
6. More Orgasms Can Help Regulate Your Period
Is your menstrual cycle literally all over the place? Something that happens when we climax is a flow of blood and nutrients that our body needs rushes down to our reproductive organs. As a direct result, it can actually end up regulating your period. Believe it or not, there are studies which actually support the fact that women who have an orgasm, a couple of times a week, are far more likely to have a period every 26-33 days than those who experience them less often.
7. DHEA and Estrogen Levels Will Increase with Orgasms
Did you know that orgasms can promote healthy hormone production? Let's start with your DHEA (dehydroepiandrosterone sulfate). It's the hormone that helps men to produce testosterone and women to produce estrogen. Well, every time that you orgasm, this level spikes up. That's a good thing because DHEA also contributes to things like stronger brain function, healthier body tissues, and great-looking skin. As far as estrogen goes, we need that to stay our gorgeous feminine selves and balanced estrogen levels play a significant role in that. Plus, estrogen is what keeps our vagina tissues in great shape—so that we can have even more orgasms. See how that all works out?
8. Your Blood Circulation Will Get Better From Orgasms
Steady blood flow is critical to our overall health and well-being. Guess what can help to make this happen? Yep, you already know. When you climax, the blood circulation in your body ramps up, to give all of your organs more vitamins, minerals, and oxygen. This helps to strengthen your cells, remove excess waste and boost brain power (for starters). Meanwhile, poor blood circulation can cause all kinds of problems including high blood pressure, muscle cramps, heart disease, strokes, and organ damage. If you see no other reason to have an orgasm a day, let this point serve as your motivation. It could help to save your life. Yes, quite literally.
9. You’ll Be More Faithful in Your Relationship
Oh, don't act like women don't cheat out here (check out "Women Cheat More Than We Think. What To Do If That's You."). Anyway, I remember a husband once saying to me that you don't want to eat when you're not hungry. His point was, when your sex tank is full, it tends to be more challenging to be tempted to cheat. Many couples totally agree with him. I have been told, countless times over the years, that when sex is good and consistent (both, not either or), there is far less of a desire to "dip out". Guess what? When it comes specifically to orgasms, there's a study that reveals that women who fake orgasms are far more likely to cheat than those who don't. I mean, if you'll lie in one area of your relationship, what's to stop you from lying elsewhere? Besides, how long can anyone go acting like they are fulfilled when they really…aren't?
10. Orgasms Will Help You Sleep Like a Baby
I don't know about y'all, but back when I was gettin' it in, there was no sleep that was better than following a couple of orgasms. It was literally like I was dead to the world in the best way possible. That's not some random happenstance. When you orgasm, the endorphin levels (including your oxytocin and prolactin hormones) in your body increase. At the same time, cortisol (your natural stress hormone) ends up decreasing. Plus, your pituitary hormone vasopressin is triggered when you climax and that can make you want to catch some extra zzz's too.
Yeah, while a lot of people are out here thinking that sex at night is due to convenience, another reason so many of us are fans is because it is one of the most effective ways to get a good night's rest too!
There you have it. 10 solid reasons to strongly consider having an orgasm, not every once in a while or even once a week—but every single day of your life. Your mind and body will adore you for it. Science has just proven it.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Your April 2025 Horoscopes Are All About Softening Into Love & Speaking Your Truth
April is a month to slow down and to fully grasp what has been. The month starts in fiery Aries Season, but we are also in the thick of Retrograde Season as we begin the month as well. Thankfully, Mercury finally goes direct on April 7, after being retrograde mid-March, and communication matters are clearing up. This is a month of mental clarity, a fresh start, and not being afraid to dream a little bigger.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, and this Full Moon brings relationship and financial matters full circle. This is the time to let go of what doesn’t make you feel balanced or in harmony and to create space for more peace to enter your life. Venus goes direct in Pisces on the same day, after being retrograde since March 1, and love is healing. With Venus now direct, there are more opportunities for commitment and longevity in love, and there is overall a greater feeling of romance, receptivity, and compassion in the air now.
Mercury enters Aries from April 16 until May 10, and what you were trying to see through or understand better while Mercury was retrograde here last month, you are experiencing a breakthrough now. Mercury in Aries is insightful and courageous, and people are more likely to speak their minds and initiate conversation with this energy. Mars then enters Leo from April 18 until June 17, reminding us that sometimes it’s okay to be a little more selfish and to focus on what you need right now. Mars in Leo brings forth confidence, creativity, and passion, and brings an exciting energy to charge of your life and advocate for yourself.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, bringing some earth sign energy into the mix, grounding and nurturing what you are creating in your life right now. On April 27, we have a New Moon in Taurus, and this is an abundant and fruitful New Moon. This is one of the best New Moons of the year for you to set your intentions for your financial world and a time for seeing new opportunities for abundance. On the last day of the month, Venus moves into Aries until June 6th, and love requires a little more passion, independence, and excitement during this time.
Overall, April is a month of feeling things through, taking more intuitive risks, investing in yourself, and balancing your needs with the needs of your relationships.
Read for your sun and rising sign below to see what April has in store for you.
ARIES
April is your month to shine, Aries. With the chaos of March now over, you are starting to see the progress of where life is and how everything has turned out even better than you were expecting. The month begins with the Sun in your 1st house of self, and you are feeling more confident, courageous, and in tune with yourself. With a Full Moon in your sister sign on April 12, relationships are also coming full circle for you now, and you are claiming your peace this month.
Mercury finally goes direct on April 7 and then enters your sign from April 16 to May 10, and this is going to clear up any miscommunications that you have been through. With Mercury now in your sign, your conversations are lively, your mind is inspiring, and you are thinking one step ahead. Before the month ends, Venus enters your sign from April 30 to June 6, and love is also moving forward for you now. Overall, this is a month where you are experiencing some happy outcomes and loyal support.
TAURUS
April is a month of passion and purpose, Taurus. You are living in your abundance, and are focused on valuing yourself and the things you are bringing to fruition right now. Venus, your ruling planet, goes direct on March 12 after being retrograde in your financial house since March 1, and you are moving into the month experiencing more opportunities and also feeling more respected in what you are accumulating for yourself and standing your ground on.
Taurus Season officially begins on April 19, and it’s all about you right now. This Taurus Season is smoothing things out for you in love, with new relationship developments unfolding and life flourishing for you. The New Moon this month is in your sign on April 27, it’s time for a new beginning. You are truly embracing your strength in April, making things happen for yourself, and no longer doubting your future and what is possible for you.
GEMINI
This month is all about the options becoming available to you now, Gemini. With your ruling planet Mercury going direct at the beginning of the month on April 7, you no longer feel as held back or out of place as you may have in the past weeks. With Mercury now direct, your thinking is clearer, and you are seeing the opportunities in your career and professional world that you may have missed before.
The more you can embrace your authenticity, the less time you will spend doubting how others perceive you, remember that this month.
On April 12, there is a Full Moon in Libra, highlighting the romance in your life and bringing forth understanding and compassion within your close relationships. You are letting go of old attachments or self-doubts that haven’t been serving your love life, and are growing closer to your own heart in the process. Before April comes to an end, Mars enters your 3rd house of communication, and you are overall leaving the month focused on your progress, your vision, and taking up space because you deserve to.
CANCER
This month is all about balancing your time and energy wisely, Cancer. You are being reminded not to overwork or overwhelm yourself in April, and to focus on doing the things that are within your control right now. The Sun is in your 10th house of career for most of the month so you are feeling really passionate about the things you are developing in your life right now, but it’s all about finding the right balance between your personal goals and your needs in your relationships as well.
The Full Moon in Libra on April 12 will be a time to devote your energy to self-care, close loved ones, and overall getting some time to decompress. You are ready to let go of the things that don’t make you feel safe or nurtured and are receiving an emotional renewal right now. The New Moon in Taurus at the end of the month is a time to focus on your intentions on your community, friendships, and aspirations in life, and to pay attention to where you can create more abundance here.
LEO
Things are turning around for you for the better, Leo. April is a dynamic month, and you are owning your inner alchemist. With a Full Moon in your 3rd house of communication on April 12, you are getting the messages you have been looking for and the mental clarity you have found is bringing closure to some of your close relationships. This month is about being flexible and trusting the changes that are happening for you right now.
On April 18, Mars enters your sign until June 17, and this is huge for you. You began the year with Mars retrograde in your sign, so you are getting the opportunity now, to rewrite some of the things that weren’t working for you at the beginning of the year. You are overcoming previous obstacles, and experiencing a breakthrough in your life this month. Before April ends, there is a New Moon in Taurus, highlighting your career, reputation, and professional life. This is a good New Moon to set your intentions for what goals you want to come to fruition for you now.
VIRGO
This month is all about building new foundations in your life, Virgo. You are feeling more supported and in tune with your own inner needs and interests, and it’s bringing you closer to people and systems that resonate. Your ruling planet Mercury goes direct this month on April 7 after being retrograde for the past few weeks; bringing more clarity, understanding, and compassion to your partnerships in life. You are focused on love this month and are working together with others to make your dreams come true.
Mid-month, Mars moves into your 12th house of closure and endings, and there is a journey of healing that you experience until June 17. You are motivated to understand yourself better and are looking at the past more right now in order to do so. This is a month of recovering and healing from what has been, for new foundations to be built upon. The New Moon on April 27 is a beautiful way to end the month, as you are getting glimpses of a new, abundant, adventure that is ahead of you.
LIBRA
This is a big month of closure for you, Libra. The Sun is in your 7th house of love for most of April, and your heart is in the right place. With Venus, your ruling planet, going direct on April 12 after being retrograde since March 1, you are finally able to take a breath. You are not experiencing as many obstacles when it comes to communication matters and you are feeling like you have the tools you need to move forward right now.
The Full Moon of the month is in your sign on April 12, and you are ready to let go of what isn’t working for you. You have been through a lot recently and have gained the clarity you need to let go of old attachments. Venus moves into your house of love before the month ends, and you are leaving the month feeling more in tune with where things are moving forward for you, rather than what you are leaving behind. Your heart moves through a journey in April, and your emotions are showing you a lot.
SCORPIO
April is a month of success, progress, and dreams coming to fruition, Scorpio. You are focused on your health, your priorities, and creating space for the new beginnings that you are creating in your life right now. The Full Moon mid-month is a big closure moment for you, and you are owning the fact that you have healed and you are no longer the same person you were in the past. This is a month of stepping into your power and feeling supported in doing so.
Mid-month, Mars enters your 10th house of career and public life and you are shining within your purpose. Over the next month and a half, you are going to be gaining some new opportunities that will be serving your professional life and goals. This is the month to show up and to let your skills, talents, and authenticity shine. On April 17, there is a New Moon in your opposite sign, Taurus, and you are leaving the month with some pleasant surprises in store for you in love as well.
SAGITTARIUS
April is a new beginning for you, Sagittarius. You are focused on putting the action and effort behind your goals, and you are being proactive within the opportunities that you are looking for right now. With a Full Moon in your 11th house of aspirations mid-month, you are letting go of the way you thought things would play out for you and are owning a more abundant version of things.
On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus, which will be highlighting your health and what your body needs more of right now. This is a New Moon to set your intentions for your everyday life and to create a new, beneficial routine that will make things easier for you at the end of the day. Before the month ends, Venus enters your 9th house of adventure, and you are leaving the month with your sights set high. Travel plans are likely, and this is a good time to create some new plans for yourself.
CAPRICORN
April is about putting one step in front of the other with patience and dedication and trusting the decisions you are making for yourself right now, Capricorn. The Sun is in your 4th house for most of the month, and you are yearning for your safe spaces, comfort foods, and loyal people. Giving yourself more time to decompress, take care of yourself, and ground your energy is essential this month.
Mars enters your 8th house of transformation mid-month and will be fueling your need for some change, excitement, and emotional rejuvenation over the next month and a half. You are entering an impactful moment of the year for you, and you are motivated toward change right now. The New Moon at the end of the month is in a fellow earth sign, highlighting the romantic new beginnings you are entering now. Overall, this month is a process, and you are opening new doors while finding gratitude in what is here for you now.
AQUARIUS
April is about giving yourself time to process, accept, and gain a new perspective, Aquarius. You are being guided towards friendship, connection, and community, and are understanding what may be creating the discord in your life that has been distancing you from that. The Full Moon this month is happening in Libra on April 12, and you are ready to let go of feeling like you have to do it all at once or all alone. This month is a reminder to take your time with all the experiences you want to have, trusting that they will come to fruition for you.
Mars enters your house of love and partnership on April 18, and you enter a passionate and steamy time. Romance is in the air for you as you move through the month, and you are spending more of your time with those who you want to move forward with. Venus also moves into a relationship area of your chart before April ends, and you are surrounded by love and community. Overall, this month is showing you that you are not alone and you don’t have to go through the heavy stuff alone either.
PISCES
This is a month where your heart is shining, and you are feeling in tune with the progress you have made in your life and within your relationships, Pisces. You are owning your value, your worth, and the beauty of who you are, and are ready to leave the past behind. With Mercury and Venus both going direct in Pisces this month after being retrograde in your sign for the past few weeks, you are in a better space than you have been, and there are fewer obstacles and miscommunications in your life.
You have been through a journey of understanding yourself better through your goals, perspectives, and interests, and have been committing yourself to your authenticity. On April 27, there is a New Moon in Taurus happening, and this New Moon is a good time for communication matters, getting your message across, and for your creative pursuits. With the clarity you feel within your mind and heart right now, you are making a lot of progress in April and feeling pleased with where life is headed.
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