Twenty years ago, Mara Brock Akil gifted the culture with a sitcom that would single-handedly repurpose what it meant to see successful black women on prime time television. This gift ended up being the brilliantly black super-show,Girlfriends. Girlfriends changed the landscape of what it meant to be black women, as it depicted who we are when we step into our whole selves, giving us permission to step outside the confines of corporate America and simultaneously listen to our music, drink chai lattes, date as much as possible, and be black AF at the same damn time. We all loved us some Joan, Toni, Lynn, and the infamous Maya Denise Wilkes, and we still do.
Maya, played by Golden Brooks, immediately became a standout favorite, cementing her place as a cultural phenom who must be protected at all costs (liiiike, I'm serious--whatever that cost is to make sure sis is good, I'm writing the check).
Most recently, Brooks had us all out here collectively screaming "Oh, hell, yes!" as she took to Instagram to celebrate her jaw-dropping 50th birthday. And ladies, we were shooketh by the fact that she is somehow cheating the aging process, by not aging at all.
Since we don't believe there's a such thing as talking about Girlfriendstoo much around here, what better way to celebrate with her, than detailing how precious she is to black women.
So, Happy Birthday, Queen Golden! Here's 5 things about Golden Brooks we should all celebrate:
Golden understands the importance of using her platform to amplify the voices of black women.
Brooks is notorious for using her platform for good. Her social media is filled with references to in-demand messages, from getting out to vote, to wearing masks, all the way to the demand for justice for Breonna Taylor. In her latest movie, The Waiting Room, a BETher initiative to promote Breast Cancer Awareness, Brooks takes the time to visit the conversation of the importance of conducting self-checks. She shared with the New York Post:
"Sadly, [breast cancer] is a condition that really hits African-American women. It's a scary moment when you hear the diagnosis that you have breast cancer. Early detection is everything. As women, we just have to really be on it—so it's good to get those Pap smears and mammograms."
The Waiting Room takes a look at a broken relationship between Cynthia (Brooks) and her daughter, that's tested after Cynthia receives a cancer diagnosis and struggles to cope with the disease.
She adores her daughter (who is a real life Barbie, and the perfect blend of mom and dad).
In 2009, Brooks gave birth to her daughter, Dakota, who she often shows off on Instagram. Dakota, who's dad is DB Woodside (The Temptations, Suits, Lucifer) is an exact replica of both mom and dad, making her one of the luckiest girls in the world.
In a caption on Instagram, she wrote:
"I know you still like me to carry you like you're still a baby when you're sad, I know your favorite pass time is still snuggling up with me for our movie nights and I CANNOT believe my Dakota Woodside is going to the 6th grade!! So proud of you baby girl. These kids have seen a lot in these past few months. More than most in their lifetime. You handled it all like a boss kid!"
Golden often references Maya on her social media.
Nostalgia for the win! Listen, I don't know if who enjoys reminiscing about Maya more: me or Golden, but her social media is filled with enough hilarious Maya references and Girlfriends shout-outs to hug our worlds. Seeing her have fun with a character that we all hold as a staple, is almost too much to handle. She often repost fan clips of watching the show or checks in to see what episodes people are watching for the day.
"We made magic! ONE of my favs was this episode! With my talented @traceeellisross We ALL did the damn thang!! Will be forever grateful to ALL the gang!! Thank you guys for sharing all of these amazing clips!!"
Ah, my heart.
She gives us looks!
Don't let the age fool you, sis is not new to any of this. Brooks keeps up updated with various flawless selfies and pic posts through her social media accounts. One says, "Just taking in the LOVE." Another, "Just smile because..."
Golden is loving and supportive of everyone in black culture.
In addition to her Girlfriends, daughter, selfies, and awareness posts, Brooks is all about supporting and loving on those around her, particularly in the black culture. From Kobe, to Naya Rivera, to promoting friend's businesses. She sends prayers (Sinbad), wishes special birthdays (TV Husband, Khalil Kain), and more, Golden shows how much of a gem she really is.
Being a light in dark times, is such an underrated characteristic.
--
Thank you for everything, Golden!
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Featured image via Joe Seer / Shutterstock.com
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Again, the answer never changes because, if there is one thing that Shellie Reneé Warren is gonna get, it’s 6-8 (sometimes nine) hours of sleep. However, since my chronotype (check out “Ever Wonder What Personality Traits Make Someone A 'Morning Person'?”) means that I like/prefer to write in the wee hours of the morning, sometimes I will sleep for the night for five hours and take a nap in the day. And y’all, that is just fine with me because I am well aware of the fact that napping does everything from give me more energy, heighten my alertness and even make me more creative to decrease stress levels, strengthen immunity, and reduce my chances of experiencing a heart attack or stroke.
My problem is I will oftentimes go “overboard” with my daytime zzz’s. What I mean by that is, in order to get the most out of a nap, they say thatyou shouldn’t sleep for longer than 25 minutes or so; otherwise, you could wake up feeling sluggish (I don’t but…). Also, it can make resting, soundly, at night a bit of a struggle.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? We should get quickies in? Yeah. And it’s funny that the word “quickie” would come up because just like a sex quickie can do wonders for you (and it can — check out “12 Super Solid Reasons To Have A Quickie Every Single Day”), it’s a full-circle moment when I say that something that can improve the quality of your sex life is to have a power nap (a nap that lasts between 10-30 minutes).
Wanna know how the two things correlate? Honestly, it’s no secret that sleep and sex work together to optimize both (check out “6 Fascinating Ways Sex And Sleep Definitely Go Hand In Hand”). Today, though, we’re going to tap into how a nap, specifically, can have you partaking in some of the best sex that you’ve experienced in a minute. I’ll explain.
Naps Reduce Stress
GiphyIf you’re feeling super stressed out right now, you are not alone. There is plenty of data out here that says that most of us are stressed for at least a couple of reasons at a time — and that can impact your sexual health on a few levels. For one thing, it can bring about feelings of depression and/or anxiety. Stress can also throw your hormone levels off (including your cycle) which can weaken your libido. Stress can make you want to put distance between you and your partner (yes, literally).
Stress can also make it challenging to get aroused or to have an orgasm. And just what can help to decrease stress? Taking a nap. Since sleep has a way of helping you to “get off of the clock” and relax a bit, that can lower your stress levels and “reset” your body so that you are calmer — and that, in turn, can do wonders for your sex drive and ultimately your sex life.
Naps Improve Your Mood
GiphyThere is one person in my life, and fairly 80 percent of the time, she’s in a super good mood. Oh, but let that girl go without sleep, and…who is this woman? LOL. There’s research behind why this happens. When a person is sleep-deprived, it messes with their brain chemicals, and that can amplify emotions like anger, restlessness and sadness. In fact, one study revealed that people who had their sleep disrupted throughout the night, they ended up having their positive outlook on life reduced by about 30 percent.
And geeze, who wants to have sex when they’re not feeling very good? Anyway, since serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps to regulate your moods, your sleep patterns, and your libido and sleep is what helps to keep it in balance — by taking a nap, not only can it help you to feel better, it can also increase your desire for sex (it can also build up your endurance which is also…sexually beneficial).
Naps Increase Your Focus and Concentration
GiphySomething that some of my clients bring up is how, when it comes to having sex, sometimes the flesh is willing while the spirit is weak because, although the desire for intimacy is there, so much is going on that they aren’t able to get still enough to focus on experiencing copulation with their partner. This also tracks because, when you don’t have enough rest, your brain finds itself not working in harmony and that can make it hard to do everything from approaching life with a sense of flexibility to making necessary decisions.
Certain data also reveal that a lack of rest can cause you to have a really poor attention span and not process things in context (the more you know). So, if you really want to get some yet it’s hard for you to focus long enough to make it happen, ask your bae to lie down with you and take a nap. Between the sleep and the snuggling (check out “Fall's Coming: 8 Wonderful Health Benefits Of Cuddling”) — you may wake up with your mind and body totally on the same page. #wink
Naps Can Make You Feel Better About Your Body
GiphyEven if, overall, you feel really good about your body, I think that we all have moments when we feel less attractive than others — and who wants to have sex when they don’t really feel…very sexy? Well, something else that sleep, in general, can do is increase your confidence in your body.
For one thing, if you want to lose a few pounds, sleep can actually make that happen by helping your body metabolize the glucose (sugar) that’s in it so that you can better manage your appetite. Other studies go on to share that since sleep deprivation can impact one’s mental health and emotional stability in a negative way, of course, getting enough rest would increase body positivity.
Shoot, science even goes so far as to say that insomnia can cause people to have an elevated level of dissatisfaction when it comes to their body image. Don’t take their word for it, though. Look in the mirror before a nap. Then look in a mirror after waking up from me. Do you feel better? I’d be surprised if you don’t.
Makes Your Brain Bigger…Which Could Make Your Orgasms Better
GiphyI saved the best for last by design. Now if you’re wondering how in the world a nap can improve (and possibly increase) your orgasms — oh, there is a method to the madness…trust. For starters, the saying that your biggest sex organ is your brain? That isn’t a myth. Long story less long, the brain is what houses your central nervous system and that is what controls how men and women sexually function (yes, literally).
And since the brain also releases feel-good chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin during sex and brain activity significantly increases in women during sexual activity (especially right before she orgasms) — well, would it trip you out to know that when you take a nap, your brain actually expands? A bigger brain (that’s healthy) can potentially intensify your sexual experiences (and your climaxes) — and who doesn’t want that to go down?
____
Like I said earlier, I never have to be convinced to get a nap in. However, if your sex life has been a bit stagnant lately, you’ve been feeling a little sluggish and you’re not sure what to do — I’m hoping that a nap can get you right.
There’s enough science to prove that it can. All you need to do is give it a shot.
Now where’s your pillow and sleep mask, chile?
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