New York Fashion Week is like no other fashion event in the world. The semi-inaugural event that takes place in February and September sets the stage for a myriad of fashion trends you are sure to see everywhere come fall and spring, as the February collections show off F/W fashion and the September collections highlight S/S fashion.
This season, we are excited to see some of the 110 confirmed designers, including a few of our favorite Black designers like returning brands LaQuan Smith, Sergio Hudson, Theophilio, Victor Glemaud, and newcomers like Tia Adeola. Not to mention, the Council of Fashion Designers of America (CFDA) and Vogue Fashion Fund finalists are Fe Noel and No Sesso, two fashion brands led by Black women.
While it’s a well-known event that has been taking place since 1943, it exudes a mysterious ambiance. Questions like, “How do I get into the shows?” and “Do I have to pay to attend fashion week?” take over the minds of those who love fashion but don’t quite understand the perplexing game of NYFW. Thanks to a number of style influencers, we have been able to get a sneak peek of what it means to attend fashion week through their riveting content.
That’s why we tapped a few of our favorite fashion girlies to spill the tea on how they get ready for NYFW, a common misconception about the shows, and what advice they have for folks that want to learn more about the process. Ahead, find some fashion week gems from some fashion week pros.
Host/Beauty & Fashion Expert
Courtesy of Blake Newby
How long she has been attending NYFW:
"Five years."
Her favorite part about fashion week:
"I love that I get to see so many people who I wouldn't normally see. In some ways, it really feels like an industry family reunion."
How she gets ready for NYFW:
"Boy, how long do you have? Well, as a huge beauty girl, it's a must that my glam is in place — that means hair is done, facials are had, nails are done, and of course, the fashions. So I go about many avenues to get my outfits together. That includes fashion pulls from designers, running around the city doing buys, and ordering from online.
"The thing about NYFW is you can change three to four times in a day, so you have to be prepared. In addition, I also ensure that my schedule is as organized as possible — there's so much going on and often overlapping, so pre-planning your days is an absolute must."
A common misconception about attending fashion week:
"That there is any ounce of leisure. Fashion week is nonstop and can certainly be exhausting. While it's such a great time, make no mistake, it's a job."
Her advice for fashion lovers who want to join in on the fun:
"Look into open-to-the-public brand activations happening! There are actually so many. Additionally, it's such a fantastic opportunity to get some great content. Visit some of the areas where shows are happening, and there are always great street-style photographers looking to capture great outfits."
Founder/CEO
Courtesy of Ah-Niyah Gold
How long she has been attending NYFW:
"Eight years."
Her favorite part about fashion week:
"Fashion week always feels like a creative reunion. I love seeing my friends who travel in for the shows."
How she gets ready for NYFW:
" Working in PR, I'm required to begin planning for fashion week months out with clients, especially if we are doing a runway show. It requires intense prep and strategy sessions with the teams to get things in place. It's always a beat-the-clock for me."
A common misconception about attending fashion week:
"That it's just fun. While I do enjoy myself when time allows, it's an extremely intense period."
Her advice for fashion lovers looking to join in on the fun:
"Fashion week is a lot more inclusive than it has been. Designers are even hitting the streets of the city to do public shows which is always fun."
Style Expert & Founder of HighLowLuxxe
Courtesy of Jenee Naylor
How long she has been attending NYFW:
"I’ve been attending NYFW for a couple of years at this point; however, the experience still feels new every time! This will be my fifth NYFW, and it’s always an exciting, inspiring, and event-filled experience."
Her favorite part about fashion week:
"There are so many reasons why I absolutely love fashion month in general! As someone who considers themselves an expert, I really appreciate the opportunity to celebrate the creativity and art form of fashion itself. The entire experience is full of personal expression and is the best opportunity to learn about new designers and upcoming trends. In my opinion, NYFW is the most exciting US-based fashion week and features some of my favorite designers."
How she gets ready for NYFW:
"When it comes to preparing and curating my wardrobe for fashion month, I usually create a mood board to help pinpoint the looks, theme, and overall aesthetic for each city. Then I’ll really take my time finding specific pieces and unique items until I have entire looks put together. It's really important to try on your outfits beforehand and get an indication of how it feels on your body and to imagine how the outfit may look photographed. Oftentimes I’ll take a mirror pic of me in the outfit to have a quick reference in helping plan my outfits and itinerary."
A common misconception about attending fashion week:
"I think a big misconception about attending fashion week is that you need to have an action-packed, 100% confirmed itinerary to show up. Although there should be intentionality in attending fashion week and thoughtfulness in terms of the financial commitment, it's such a wonderful thing to experience. I’d definitely recommend that fashion enthusiasts and creators attend even if there’s uncertainty around whether you’ll get into certain shows or go to the hottest events. Just being in the mix offers so much inspiration and opportunity to network and grow."
Her advice for fashion lovers looking to join in on the fun:
"For those looking to attend fashion week, it’s really important to understand your 'why.' What is it that you’re looking to gain from the experience? Do you want to network; is it a goal to attend certain fashion shows; are you aiming to get your picture taken by a particular outlet? Attending fashion week can be a costly investment, so having concrete goals is really important. Check out my Fashion Month Recap Newsletter from last October, where I talk about my top 3 tips for attending fashion month."
Content Creator & Writer
Courtesy of Simi
How long she has been attending NYFW:
"This will be my second full year!"
Her favorite part about fashion week:
"Seeing all the beautiful fashion!"
How she gets ready for NYFW:
"It starts off with really hydrating and relaxing skincare and body care. I get my nails done. I get waxed, the whole nine. Then I organize my outfits either via show or per day and REST a lot the weeks prior!"
A common misconception about attending fashion week:
"That the purpose is to be seen. It's not. It's to take in the art of the designers and connect with like-minded people. If you're not intending to drool over exquisite looks and sing your praises to some of your idols, it's not really worth it!"
Her advice for fashion lovers looking to join in on the fun:
"Come! And let the city take you. Dress your best, in a way that is uniquely and totally you. You never know who you might bump into! Don't feel pressured by others' expectations. Have FUN! Be you. Let your style speak for you. And always, always, always, be kind to those around you!”
Blogger/Content Creator & Founder of A Styled Mind
Courtesy of Ashley Weddington
How long she has been attending NYFW:
"Since 2016."
Her favorite part about fashion week:
" Reconnecting with other creators I only get to see during this time of year."
How she gets ready for NYFW:
"As far as styling goes, I usually scroll through my IG and see what pieces were some of my standout favorites and that I wouldn't mind recreating a look around. From there I'll review my fashion wishlists and see if there are any pieces I have yet to purchase that would be fitting for the occasion. After I place my orders, I create a list in my Notes of full outfits, including accessories and shoes, to make sure I have everything I need. And sometimes, even with all of that 'preparation,' I'll still pull last-minute outfits together during the week in the midst of the chaos.
"Regarding shows/events, I've been going for so many years that I have a basic email template that I use to send to all of the brands whose presentations I'm interested in attending for that season. Once the official schedule drops (3-4 weeks prior), I'll go through and send out all of my emails which usually end up being anywhere from 30-40. From there, I'll follow up one more time the week before if I still have not received a response and create a final schedule in my notes of all of the events I've been confirmed for broken out by day and time."
A common misconception about attending fashion week:
"It's all fun and no work. As glamorous as it looks, it is extremely tiring and there is an immense pressure to attend every show/event, capture content, and post in the moment... all while remembering to eat."
Her advice to give fashion lovers looking to join in on the fun:
"Networking is key, so be sure to work on building authentic relationships with PR agencies and always follow up with any brand contacts you've worked with in the past or would love to partner with in the future! Don't feel pressured to buy an entire new wardrobe for every season or feel pressured to keep up with every single trend. Wear what makes you feel the most confident and is authentic to you!”
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image courtesy of Ashley Weddington
- 5 Looks Cardi B Shut Down Paris Fashion Week In ›
- 5 Times Lori Harvey Shut Down 2022 NYFW ›
- Issa Wrap! NYFW Has Ended & Here's Who Stole All Of Our Edges ›
- Inside Style Writer Joce Blake's New York Fashion Week Diary ›
RELATED
The essence of effortless poise and refinement shines bright through the iconic university colors of indigo blue, red, and white. Every October, Howard University students, alumni, staff, and friends gather on the prestigious campus in Washington, D.C. to take part in time-honored traditions and events, which is Homecoming. This year's theme, “The Meccaverse,” was a week-long celebration of Howard University’s heritage, including the Homecoming football game and Bison Pep Rally, the Fashion Show, Greek Life Step Show, Homecoming Day of Service, Lavender Reception, and the iconic Yard Fest Concert.
As 2024 marked the 100th anniversary of the Howard Bison trek back to The Mecca and after two years of virtual events due to the COVID-19 pandemic, this was to be a celebration of a lifetime. We enlisted HU alumnus Sharmaine Harris, a luxury retail buyer, as she revisited her alma mater as eyes on the yard for fashion-forward outfits mixed with personal style and campus pride for the weeklong celebration.
Before we get to the looks, discover how attending Howard University impacted her career in fashion and her day-to-day style:
Credit: Sharmaine and Friends
xoNecole: Describe your personal style. Did attending Howard have any impact on developing it?
Sharmaine: Howard taught me that there’s no such thing as being TOO dressed. There’s always a reason to “put it on” and look presentable, even if it’s just for a day of classes. Standing out was celebrated and encouraged with my peers embracing the opportunity, giving me the confidence to try new styles and trends.
xoNecole: How did Howard shape your career as a luxury buyer?
Sharmaine: I studied Fashion Merchandising, through which I was fortunate to have professors who were very connected to the industry and able to give first-hand accounts of opportunities and what to expect post-college. I was also able to build a network through my peers and other Howard Alum, which has opened doors to endless possibilities both within fashion as well as daily life.
The same confidence instilled in me through my style has also been rooted deeply within me as I step into any role or project I’m faced with throughout my career.
xoNecole: This year marked Howard’s 100th-anniversary Homecoming celebration. Can you describe what the weekend looked and felt like?
Sharmaine: I’ve gone to many Howard Homecomings since graduating, but this year’s 100th anniversary felt like a huge family reunion filled with nothing but love. It was beautiful to see so many Bison return home looking great and radiating joy. It was beautiful!
xoNecole: What makes Howard fashion different from other HBCUs?
Sharmaine: Being that Howard is The Mecca, we have such a diverse population with each individual having their own spin on fashion. Getting dressed is second nature for us, but the layered confidence is our secret ingredient to make any look come together. Through that comfortability to push barriers, we have a legacy of setting trends, as indicated by the many alumni we have in the fashion and entertainment industry.
Keep scrolling for the top street style moments from The Mecca's Homecoming weekend:
Credit: Lacey Gallagher
Credit: Alan Henderson
Credit: JaLynn Davis
Credit: Dylan Davis
Credit: Caleb Smith
Credit: Kendall W.
Credit: Jordyn Finney
Credit: Vanessa Nneoma
Credit: Dr. Mariah Sankey-Thomas
Credit: Caleb MacBruce
Credit: Tiffany Battle
Credit: Teniola
Credit: Ilahi Creary
Credit: Nicolas Ryan Grant
Credit: Dylan Davis
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image courtesy of Sharmaine Harris
Anyway, in my personal opinion, when it comes to sexual activity, there should also be etiquette that should be applied — you know, “rules of conduct” (or engagement) for how we should expect to be treated and how we choose to treat others. Because, even if you don’t hear about sex being presented in the form of needing to have manners, having a certain level of decorum, and/or requiring a mutual level of dignity, that should absolutely be the case.
And just like some of the lifestyle etiquette tips that I learned back in the day have stayed with me all of this time, it’s my hope that if you aren’t applying (or requiring) the following 10 sex etiquette suggestions (all 10 of ‘em too) that you will start…so that they will remain with you as well.
1. Discuss Sex-Related Things That Will Directly Impact Y’all’s Health
GiphyDoes even one day go by when someone on Instagram, X, or TikTok isn’t talking about why someone should or should not know another person’s body count (check out “6 Things About The Whole 'Body Count' Debate That Should Be Discussed”)? Although I have been known to say that the kind of things we’re proud of, we tend to brag about without hesitation, that doesn’t mean that I think people are owed that type of information.
That being said, that doesn’t mean I’m not aware that there is science to back up that the more sex partners men have, the more that they increase their chances for being diagnosed with cancer; that a higher amount of sex partners can impact whether or not you get married (and that it tends to lead to divorce more often as well), and that an uptick in partners can even increase your chance of becoming a substance abuser.
Not to mention the fact that, as Dwayne Wayne once said on A Different World episode (that featured a great performance by Tisha Campbell), “the longer the list, the greater the risk” (of contracting an STI/STD) — however, if we’re looking at this point from nothing more than a sexual one, really what someone deserves to know is if you’ve been tested for STI/STDs within the past 6-12 months and, if not, if you’re willing to get tested prior to having sex with them. Anything else really is privileged information and totally up to the individual to share — both directions too.
2. This Includes Afterplay. Beforehand.
GiphyChile. I can’t tell you how many times someone has told me that they found themselves either embarrassed or flat-out pissed about how a sexual experience went. It wasn’t because of the sex itself; it was more about how things were handled afterward. Now, if you’ve never seen the (wow) 35-year-old film When Harry Met Sally (Billy Crystal, Meg Ryan) before, there’s a scene where Billy Crystal’s character talks about men trying to figure out in their mind how long they should hold a woman after having sex with her.
To me, the modern version of this is after sex, when someone asks, “So, what are you about to do?” because that sounds like code for, “You ain’t got to go home but…” Listen, when two people have real feelings for each other and/or are in a long-term dynamic, this point is — or at least, should be — pretty irrelevant.
However, if you’re in a casual sex dynamic or a situationship, I promise you you're putting yourself in a position to “feel some type of way” if you merely assume that afterplay means cuddling all night long while he thinks it’s more like polite convo for 10 minutes and then bouncing (or vice versa). If you don’t want to be bedside blindsided, discuss beforehand how you each prefer to get down.
3. Ask Before Sexting
GiphyI don’t care if the two of you have never had sex before or if you’ve been doing it for a while at this point, but if sexting has never (pardon the pun) entered the chat, you both really should ask before you start sending NSFW stuff into each other’s devices. Some people don’t like it. Some people prefer to know when stuff like that is coming because they don’t want what is being said or shown to be exposed to those around them.
Some people prefer not to “shift gears” (as far as their energy field is concerned) when it comes to being in one mindset and all of a sudden receiving sex-related content that they weren’t prepared for. Believe it or not, there is data to support that the art of sexting can improve coitus overall. However, the same research says that it needs to transpire under the umbrella of mutual respect and clear communication. I agree 1000 percent.
4. No Means No. This Applies to Us Too, Ladies.
GiphyMedia culture can be so…irresponsible, sometimes. Since we’re talking about sex, specifically, today, take when it comes to men and sex. Contrary to popular belief, no, that is not all that they think about and no, they aren’t always in the mood — for a myriad of reasons. And that’s why, I think it also should go on record that just like it’s wrong for a man to try and push a woman past her “no,” women shouldn’t do it either.
It truly isn’t said enough that you shouldn’t simply call it seduction if a guy doesn’t want to and you keep trying to get him to anyway while defining it as coercion when the shoe is on the other foot. The saying “no means no” shouldn’t have a gender bias on it. Everyone should have their boundaries respected — at all times too. Full stop.
5. A Clean and Comfortable Scene
GiphyFresh bedding. A clean bathroom. A washcloth and towel for your partner. Flip-flops (to walk around and/or take a shower in). Lubricant. Bottled water. These are the kinds of things that immediately come to mind when I think of what should automatically come with someone spending intimate time in your home. It’s also what you should be fine with requiring should you choose to have sex at someone else’s house too.
Because even if there aren’t things like scented soy candles and a ton of ambiance, you and your partner at least need to feel like you both are in a space that is clean. This should be a hands-down non-negotiable, by the way.
6. Turn ALL Devices Off
GiphyI don’t know if this means that the sex is/was really wack or you’re just a phone addict in denial but if you are “one out of every five individuals” who checks their phone during sex, I’ve got a bevy of questions for you. SMDH. For this one, in general, though, I don’t have a lot more to say other than, I don’t know how anyone could think that checking their notifications during sex — any kind of sex — isn’t rude as hell and definitely a reason for someone to hard pass on wanting to “engage” with them ever again.
So yeah, for this one, let’s go with an automatic “all devices off” rule. Since most people only want sex to last somewhere between 7-13 minutes anyway (is that per round…or???), I’m pretty sure that whatever IG Live that you’ve been waiting on can wait. Goodness.
7. Have Your Own Stash of Condoms on Deck
GiphyAssuming that the guy should always bring the condoms is about as sexually irresponsible as a guy thinking that he doesn’t need them because the woman he’s about to have sex with should be on birth control. My point here is that you really need to have your own condom collection. One, so that you’re always prepared. Two, so that you can select the condoms that you prefer (most guys are totally fine with that). Three, no matter what you might think that it implies, mature folks get that it means you are serious about protecting your health and well-being.
And what if discretion is what you’re the most concerned about? No worries, there are all kinds of condom carriers out here that basically look like tiny wallets (for example, here).
8. Keep Cleansing Cloths Around
GiphyHygiene is important, is it not? Although going into graphic detail about it may be something that most people would want to avoid, sometimes sexual activity happens spontaneously with no bathroom close by. And listen, even if the movies act like (for instance) oral sex after getting all sweaty from dancing all night in the club is hot, my mind automatically goes to it being kinda gross. So, at least keep some rinse-free cleansing cloths on deck if you don’t want to wait until you can hop into a shower. A pack in your purse or glove compartment can go a really long way. Straight up.
9. Don’t Be a Show-Off
GiphyOne guy who I had sex with back when I was in college, I was so excited about — initially. At the time, he was fine, and then some mo’ fine. To be honest, although we were very cool and spent a couple of years on campus together before I — eh hem — indulged, the main reason why I wanted to sleep with him is because I thought that his looks were a preview of his performance level. Boy was I wrong. Any time I refer to our, umm, time together, I call it “Cirque du Soleil sex” and even that is being generous because that man was trying to put me into every twist and turn that he could in under 20 minutes.
It’s like he was trying to prove that he could hold it down…and all that ended up doing was backfiring — supremely so. Moral to the story here: sex should be about two people enjoying each other, not low-key trying to compete or “outdo” one another. Anyone who says otherwise is truly bringing poor form to the bedroom, whether they realize it or not.
10. Watch Your Words. Afterwards.
GiphyOn the heels of what I just said, if sex with your partner was pretty much the equivalent of watching paint dry, it’s still important to be thoughtful about what you say. Lack of empathy, being inconsiderate of their feelings, talking to them in a way that would damn near cause you to blow a gasket (or melt into the floor) if they did the same thing to you — all of this files under hella rude behavior.
And while we’re here, please watch your body language — you know, heavy sighs, eye-rolling, stonewalling…if you don’t want to have sex with them again, that is totally your right; that doesn’t mean that you have to humiliate them in the present, though. You know, A LOT of people carry their ego in the bedroom — male and female.
That’s why I write articles like “So, 10 Women Sat Down And Told Me Why They Fake Orgasms...More Times Than Not” and “Men Fake Orgasms (And 14 Other Semi-Random Things About Them In Bed).” So, whatever transpires, try to be kind and compassionate. Karma shows up, even in the bedroom. Make sure it’s proud of how you handled yourself. One way or another, you’ll be glad that you did.
____
Sex etiquette. As you can see, it’s a very real and necessary thing. I’m curious, though. When you get a chance, hop in the comments to share some other “copulation manners” that you think are important, along with how you handle matters when they are missing or go awry. Hey, when it comes to having better sexual experiences, we’re all in this together.
Kinda. Sort of. You know what I mean. LOL.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Drazen Zigic/Getty Images